Cohabitation rules/expectations

[Technics]

I was wondering if you guys have a talk with your girl before you move in with her about any rules or expectations?

My girlfriends work are giving her a house basically free of rent and she has told me she would like me to move in (I will be living there rent free). I haven't lived with a girlfriend before and I've found one who I think I can live with so any advice would be appreciated.

I know alot of people here are against cohabitation but we won't be with eachother every day as I work away for a week then have a week off which I will stay with her then. On my week off she will be working days so will just see eachother at night and weekends before I'm off again for a week.

She basically said ''I don't want it to be you coming into my house, I want it to be our house.''

If this was a lease/contract I had to sign I don't think I would move in with her this early (1 year together) but seeings as I would be free to move out IF she started behaving badly, and the fact that we will only be living together every other week, I'm leaning towards doing it and would appreciate some advice.

 

[gravityeyelids]

Don't. Just don't. It's asking for trouble.

 

[El Payaso]

Don't do it. You probably don't want to hear this but it's a trap. But it's your girlfriend you say. You trust her. That's what the frog thought before it was stung to death by the scorpion that it helped crossed the pond.

Once you move in with her, you won't have your own space. You'll be all up in each other's grill. Familiarity breeds contempt. You'll find out so many little nuances about her that you don't like and so will she. It can be anything ranging from toilet seats to how someone leaves clothes laying around etc.

If things ever go south, guess who's getting kicked out? If you decide to move in, just make sure you have a backup plan.

 

[Technics]

So I've had a think about it and I've decided I'm not going to move in with her yet. As I've already told her I will move in, what's the best way to break it to her that I've changed my mind? She's going to ask why and I can't exactly tell her the truth.

 

[LMFAO]

The worst is going to the toilet after your girl takes a big sh!t.

I was only staying with a girl in a hotel for a couple of days, she didn't flush properly and have been put off from her from life after that.

You can just tell her that you want to let it flow naturally, and that you tried to force things with your ex and it messed things up.

 

[MtnMan]

The worst is going to the toilet after your girl takes a big sh!t.

I was only staying with a girl in a hotel for a couple of days, she didn't flush properly and have been put off from her from life after that.

You can just tell her that you want to let it flow naturally, and that you tried to force things with your ex and it messed things up.

hopefully you are not serious. Well I do no love to smell and see women $hitting....they are humans, and its part of the deal. Who really cares about that?
There are FAR FAR FAR worse dangers that are associated with cohabitation than seeing a leftover turd in the sh!tter.

 

[jurry]

Yea these responses are ridiculous. Just move in if you want bro not really that complicated. You're not signing or paying for shît.. if you like her its been a year its free nothing to lose. Id say try it out first like mauser said as you have your own place.

 

[LMFAO]

Yea these responses are ridiculous. Just move in if you want bro not really that complicated. You're not signing or paying for shît.. if you like her its been a year its free nothing to lose. Id say try it out first like mauser said as you have your own place.

Aren't you a woman posting as a man?

 

[Technics]

I assume you rent a place?

Keep your place. Try living with her on a trial basis, explain it as such. Do NOT give up your own place. Try if for a month, and see how it goes. If it is not working out, you can simply go back to the way things were,and it won't cost you one red cent more than normal.


Explain this to her as I have explained it to you.


On a happy note??
Because she WANTS you to move in, she will likely be putting out like crazy to entice you.

At the moment I'm just renting a room off a work friend as we've moved to a new town. My girlfriend will be coming in a week or so, so I just rented the room until we could go into her work house. I can still do the trial and have this place to fall back on.

The thing in my favour though is the fact that I work away for a week and then I'm back in town for a week so it won't be 24/7 with her. Anyway will see how it goes.

 

[stevo]

She might be sincere with her request with no ulterior motive (of speeding up your relationship to the "next phase" of I do) but I have learnt if I get to that point of cohabitation it would be having her move into my place rather than the other way around even if hers was free.

Call it ego or whatever but there's nothing more shattering than a girl pulling the "i call the shots because this is my house" attitude, but girls are different.


If you do move in, let her know the minute she starts to change, you're out. and keep money to the side to make sure getting accommodation last minute is a possibility

Also remember the fine print:
You moving in is marital try out and also confirms marriage is a possibility. You moving in gives her more power in the relationship. You moving in reduces your SMV and options. If you move in, moving out almost would end your relationship.

 

[jurry]

Aren't you a woman posting as a man?

Arent you a douchebag with no argument?

 

[skinnyguy]

If you aren't banging her 3 times a day, move out.

 

[:-)]

If you aren't banging her 3 times a day, move out.

I'm not sure if you're joking or if you really think that you're coming across as 'alpha' in this post. Which is it?

P.s. What did you think of my poem?

 

[Married Buried]

The worst is going to the toilet after your girl takes a big sh!t.

I was only staying with a girl in a hotel for a couple of days, she didn't flush properly and have been put off from her from life after that.

You can just tell her that you want to let it flow naturally, and that you tried to force things with your ex and it messed things up.

That's why you get a place with 2 bathrooms. Live with a chic she should have her own bathroom.

 

[logicallefty]

I agree with the idea of keeping your place and moving in with her on a trial basis, or have her keep hers and come to yours. Doing an official lease with a gf seems extreme to me. However a nice fb, text, or email chat about your expectations is a must IMO. Then later if she misbehaves you can reference it and call her out on it and she won't be able to backpedal out.

 

[Moroder]

Just for my understanding: Have you been spending some serious time with this chic in situations where either of you couldn't bail out, but need to to stay with each other? (Vacations with stolen passports, rotten foods and unexpected riots come to mind) This is what I would call getting to know each other in the true colors mode. And this is what I would make a requirement for moving in with a woman.