"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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can i hear some stories?

venser

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what are some stories you guys tell when wooing the ladies?

i always tell this one about how i got jumped once by like 4 guys when a fight went awry and how i snapped this one guys ribs and thats why i have a scar on my back. its a little exaggerated as i kinda bend the truth. it was a fight and hte other three guys didnt jump in until after i had already beaten up the first dude. and hten the cops came before the other 3 could really do anything that crazy. (i did end up with a scar on my back cuz of it though) heh. shrug.

what about you guys? any stories you guys like to tell? either to ladies or even just other dudes.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Bvbidd

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Fighting stories are lame. I've been in a sh!tload of fights all the time, it never helped me with the opposite sex. It actually turned them off, made me look anti-social. The guy that starts sh!t and can't make friends is the image you put off.
 

War Against Betaism

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I usually just come up with stories on the spot, adding a dose of my imagination of course to spice things up. But not so much. I usually don't tell stories unless there was a recurring memory of me doing something similar in a given situation.
 

WesCottII

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I tend to rip stories from comedians. (observational comedians that is)
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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mpimpin

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the story telling game is lame. Unless she tells me something and I can relate to it I don't go around telling stories. If your stories are lies that is really lame, and if they are true...come on keep a little mystery it'll do more for your game then telling that story.

I know at least in my case (and Im probably sure that in most of yours too) my great memories and stories are more ones that I would share with my guy friends rather then trying to impress some girl. Especially since mine usually have to do with random, crazy, drunk, and/or stupid good time stuff. The kinda things guys get a kick out of but women find unattractive
 

Quiksilver

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The only one I tell with any consistency is the one about me getting chased by cops on the sidewalk, when they caught me and face planted me into the pavement, they saw I wasn't who they were looking for. It's more detailed, but, yeah.. (I heard them toot their siren and pull up behind me as I was walking...so i started running. I had weed in my pocket. funny, they didnt even bother to look.

And the other one, that is so popular now that my friends tell it for me, is getting busted at a party b/c I had coke on my jeans(to this day dont kno how it got there). I was completely shi ttered, and in the back seat of a cop car(cuffs on, apparently you can rip the steel grating off with your hands), I lied about my name and phone number... memory is a little hazy(was plastered at that point) I really don't know how he got my parents number. So he drove me home, I had to sit the back of his cruiser for about an hour before my parents showed up, they were out at dinner, and I DO remember saying this as we were parked in my driveway:
Me: "Dude, I'm not feelin well, can you let me out?"
Him: "Nah, we're just gonna wait for your parents to get back.."
Me: "Dude I think I'm gonna puke."

He didn't answer...

About 3 seconds later.... BLOOOAAAHHHH!

yakked all over the back of his seat, onto the grate, through the grate, and onto the back of his shirt. I just remember him yelling: "Fvck" quietly.

Guess what? He let me out of the car then :)

He then went on to give me a $125.00 fine for public intoxication.

My parents got home, I didn't say a word, went inside and went to bed with yakk all over my shirt/trousers.

Gooood night.

Funnily enough, I saw him again a few months ago while picking up a police report for theft(we had the outdrive on our boat stolen from the lot:p) at the station, and he laughed, telling me he only gave me the fine cause I A)lied about name/number, and B) hurled all over him. Though I suspect it was B more than A.

I have a couple more cop stories, but I don't want to bore you guys.
 

mpimpin

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Wolf said:
I agree, unless it relates to the situation chances are they will not care as much about your great aunt's pet hamster as much as they would about something which they can relate to. And if they are too long and boring they lose interest pretty quickly...

:up:
 

Snow Plowman

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People who interact with each other tell stories here and there...its natural.

I usually talk about stories that happened a day or two ago, if its a time where were just going back on forth talking about stuff then I'll tell her about my saga dealing with homeless people...its like 10+ stories.
 

venser

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Quiksilver said:
The only one I tell with any consistency is the one about me getting chased by cops on the sidewalk, when they caught me and face planted me into the pavement, they saw I wasn't who they were looking for. It's more detailed, but, yeah.. (I heard them toot their siren and pull up behind me as I was walking...so i started running. I had weed in my pocket. funny, they didnt even bother to look.

And the other one, that is so popular now that my friends tell it for me, is getting busted at a party b/c I had coke on my jeans(to this day dont kno how it got there). I was completely shi ttered, and in the back seat of a cop car(cuffs on, apparently you can rip the steel grating off with your hands), I lied about my name and phone number... memory is a little hazy(was plastered at that point) I really don't know how he got my parents number. So he drove me home, I had to sit the back of his cruiser for about an hour before my parents showed up, they were out at dinner, and I DO remember saying this as we were parked in my driveway:
Me: "Dude, I'm not feelin well, can you let me out?"
Him: "Nah, we're just gonna wait for your parents to get back.."
Me: "Dude I think I'm gonna puke."

He didn't answer...

About 3 seconds later.... BLOOOAAAHHHH!

yakked all over the back of his seat, onto the grate, through the grate, and onto the back of his shirt. I just remember him yelling: "Fvck" quietly.

Guess what? He let me out of the car then :)

He then went on to give me a $125.00 fine for public intoxication.

My parents got home, I didn't say a word, went inside and went to bed with yakk all over my shirt/trousers.

Gooood night.

Funnily enough, I saw him again a few months ago while picking up a police report for theft(we had the outdrive on our boat stolen from the lot:p) at the station, and he laughed, telling me he only gave me the fine cause I A)lied about name/number, and B) hurled all over him. Though I suspect it was B more than A.

I have a couple more cop stories, but I don't want to bore you guys.
lol. once some friends and i trashed this abandoned house and the cops showed up. they gave a really lame speel about what we were doing as illegal. called our parents, drove us home and the school suspended us for a week. i still remember the cops who did it. im really cool with one of them now cuz he almost gave me a ticket a week after it happened. he let me off cuz he recognized me and now we say hey to eachtoerh all the time. (he and his partner are at my school alot)
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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