"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Breathe

Doggystyle

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Just though i'd stress the importantance of breathing correctly for inner games issues, i've have noticed that alot of the people i know that are very confident and outgoing have one similar trait, they all have deep heavy breathing, and the nervous guys i know have shallow breathing.

I myself was always shallow breathing, the only times i breathed deeply was to have a cigarette, so when i get in situations when i felt nervous i would automaticly reach for the fags to help relax me. While the nicotine rush does relax you for a few minutes, the main effect was from the deep breathing i was doing at the time.

When you get in situation when you feel nervous about something the body normally reacts in a way that makes the chest feel tight or the stomach gets that queasy feeling. I've found that whenever i notice these feeling whether in an uncomfortable event or just thinking about the event, just breathing really deeply filling your belly from using your diaphram and into chest counteracts the quesy feeling and chest tightness, making you much more relaxed and in control of the situations.

When you get nervous about something the thing that is happening is that you are too much in your head thinking. Focusing on your breathing takes you out of your head, helping to stop thinking about these negative thoughts that my be stopping you.

I have also noticed that I appear a lot more healthier, brighter eyes and more colour in my face since i have been breathing deeply. Also I seem to have a sort of aura that people want to be around, more authoritive like.

Whenever you get a negative thought in your head or you feel nervous, start focusing on your deep breaths. It will effect body language and voice too without really trying or being conscious of it, reactions and wit are sharper too.

Breathing deeply using my diaphram and chest is the essence of my innergame.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Azidoro

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Most people are not even aware of this. Guys like Ross Jeffries and the NLP community have been teaching the importance of breath since day one. Excellent tip man
 
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Very true. Breathing is such a basic, vital thing that's always overlooked. Hell I've used focusing on my breath during winter to reduce the feeling of cold and shivering. My friends would ask why I wasn't freezing and I'd just tell them to breathe, they still think I'm kidding ;)
 

Wolves

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kinda related to this, another tip would be to relax your body. A lot of guys when they're nervous (or sometimes even when they're not) just hunch their shoulders up a little bit or tense up their neck etc. and they don't even notice it... but other people do lol. Its important to be relaxed when interacting with anyone, if you're nervous you make them nervous, if you're relaxed and comfortable they'll be relaxed and comfortable, its that simple.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Azidoro

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2006
Messages
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Location
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Wolves said:
kinda related to this, another tip would be to relax your body. A lot of guys when they're nervous (or sometimes even when they're not) just hunch their shoulders up a little bit or tense up their neck etc. and they don't even notice it... but other people do lol. Its important to be relaxed when interacting with anyone, if you're nervous you make them nervous, if you're relaxed and comfortable they'll be relaxed and comfortable, its that simple.
Bump.
 
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