"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Bookstore Approach

BobbyJ

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I just stopped by the bookstore after work today to peruse through the Neil Strauss book. I'll buy it eventually when I get paid. Anyways, as I was heading out, I passed a cute girl looking at some audio books.

As I passed her by, I said, "Oh, you're one of those lazy readers?"

Her: Haha, no, the book I need is only available in audiobook here.

Me: What book is it?

Her: I can't remember the name of it, but it's a self-help book.

Me: Is it one on improving your memory?

Her: Haha, no. It's a self-help book that my boss wanted me to read.

Me: If I were you, I'd be worried about my job security if my boss told me to read a self-help book.

Her: I'm not worried, I got plenty of job security.

Me: Yeah, janitorial jobs tend to have lots of job security.

Her: Haha.


Unfortunately, she was married and I'm not into dating married chicks. But it was fun.


BobbyJ
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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DinoCassanova

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Well, good practice at cold-approaching if nothing else, right? Incidentally, how could you tell she was married? I assume you noticed a ring, and during that quick exchange you were clearly able to tell it was a wedding ring?

Mild constructive criticism: Where were you going w/that "janitorial" job thing? Seems like kind of , I don't know, rather a bit of a harsh neg, or it seems like it just came out of left field in the conversation you were relating. If anything, this is just my view, what I would have done to keep the conversation rolling would have been asked what she does for a living when it got to that point. Even if she was / is married, she was still talking to you rather openly it sounds like, so she seemed receptive. You might have been able to take that one a bit further.

~Dino
 

SELF-MASTERY

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If she weren't married, I would follow the janitorial joke with this:

you: (your janitorial joke thing)

HER: laughs

you: no serious where do you work?

or

you: (your janitorial joke thing)

her: laughs

you: (take and feel her hands) you don't have janitors hands, what do you really do for a living???

That's just my personality--- Might not work for you.

I think you made a good approach.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by BobbyJ
Unfortunately, she was married and I'm not into dating married chicks. But it was fun.


BobbyJ
And this is why I still consider this a successful approach; you had a good time regardless the outcome. :up:
 

Inc. ©

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I was laughing reading that stuff you said....you'll be successful, keep at it!
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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dirtysouth

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You're self-help book crack about her job security was good. The janitor comment, well, I didn't understand.

But who cares, you still talked up a hottie in a bookstore. Points for that!
 

BobbyJ

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The Janitor response.

When she started mentioning her job and her job security, she was making it seem like she had a very good job. There was this real confident and happy tone to her voice as she mentioned her job.

So I was under the impression that she had a great job with great job security. And janitor was the first job that I thought of that a lot of people really don't want to do, and so there's a lot of job security. I know that janitorial jobs aren't considered the greatest jobs, and I was pretty sure that she wasn't a janitor.

Also, I was just talking to an old buddy from school and he was telling me that he was getting a new, better job. I didn't ask what it was, I just jokingly said that he was going to be a janitor and he started laughing. The janitor comment is kind of random, but it's all in the delivery.


I live in a college town and some girls (& guys) don't know what they want to do for a living. And in the event that the girls are older than me or the girls I normally date, I'll joke that they should become one of those Walmart Greeters.

Another fun line to use when I meet girls around where I live is to guess their major in school. If they seem to have a ditzy/fun personality I'll usually name off one of the more intellectual/nerdy majors like Math or Molecular Biology and if they seem like a hardworking brainiac, I'll just ask them which beauty school they go to. And we usually have a laugh at that.

I like doing this because in most college towns, the first questions people ask are "What are you studying" or "What's your major?" So it adds some pizzaz.


BobbyJ
 

crossboss

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Bobbyj

Hey, you seem to be pretty funny. Do you think you could put a post on how to be funny? Just do a search, "Building Blocks of Being Funny" Post there. Hope to hear some your input.
 
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