Being more confident IN ALL situations.

[VAboi]

I'm going to be a senior now and Im nervous about starting school. How do you find people to sit with? I get nervous pretty easily....

 

[jeffthechef]

Why do you get nervous?

There are only two reasons that i can think of right now as to why anyone would be nervous in SOCIAL situations.

1. They feel inferior
2. They don't want to "screw up;" they try to please others rather than be themselves. They kiss the asses of others in order to feel accepted

Tell me the source of your nervousness

But if it's one of the two i mentioned or both...Think like a king. Would you be afraid to sit and eat with your citizens? (Don't think too far into this example...i have a feeling some people are going to say..well if you're an evil king bla bla)
No reason to feel inferior and no reason to please others..

 

[LinkinParkROX]

This'll save you a LOT of trouble later. Do the boot camp.

 

[Analyzeit]

It's only a bit of nervousness buddy.

Knowing why isn't going to help.

But jeff's right don't go round feeling inferior but do not think like a king, you go round thinking your the man and your better then everyone else and everyones going to think your a joke, having an attitude that your the king is not good. Your equal man, equal but better. The questions now weather "would you be afraid to sit with your citizens?" and it's not like that it's would you be afraid to go sit with your equals? I'm not saying don't be better stay as equal, i'm saying don't think your the king, No one likes a king but people do like an equal even if the equal is better then them.

But jeffs right on the second one you have no reason to try please other people, none at all.

And i guess to only way to get over this is experience so try a few things in the boot camp it'll get your confidence up.

 

[jeffthechef]

It's only a bit of nervousness buddy.

Knowing why isn't going to help.

But jeff's right don't go round feeling inferior but do not think like a king, you go round thinking your the man and your better then everyone else and everyones going to think your a joke, having an attitude that your the king is not good. Your equal man, equal but better. The questions now weather "would you be afraid to sit with your citizens?" and it's not like that it's would you be afraid to go sit with your equals? I'm not saying don't be better stay as equal, i'm saying don't think your the king, No one likes a king but people do like an equal even if the equal is better then them.

But jeffs right on the second one you have no reason to try please other people, none at all.

And i guess to only way to get over this is experience so try a few things in the boot camp it'll get your confidence up.

I DID NOT SAY HE SHOULD BE ARROGANT. NOT ALL KINGS ARE ARROGANT. Most kings are confident men who have direction and know how to lead. I DID NOT SAY ARROGANT. YOU made the connection between KING AND ARROGANT, not me. AND NO, WE ARE NOT ALL EQUALS, necessarily.

Consider this: Yes, under the declaration of independence and a bunch of other doctrines, we are all created equal. We all have equal rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. BUT BUT BUT..Consider a man who beats the **** out of people and robs them. Then, works his way up to murdering his victims than robbing them. And begins to rape and torture before robbing. Now, let's consider a man who's homeless and begs for money. He sees a woman drop her wallet, and with the knowledge that he still hasn't gotten enough money to eat that night...still gives the wallet back to her rather than stealing it.

I in no way believe that the robber is superior to the homeless beggar. There ARE superior men in this world based on VIRTUES AND MORALS. BUT. BUT, there is a level of equality among the superior men in this world. So if you're a virtuous person, then you are superior to those who cheat and steal, etc. But you are equals with others who exhibit the same strong moral character.

 

[nateistoraw]

this is how i stay confident.

Well, I tell myself this,"I am too busy being delicious to feel rejected"

 

[Analyzeit]

Thats true you didn't say arrogant king and definitely not all kings are arrogant.

But being a dj or at least something close to a dj isn't hard, there's no need to think your a king, being equal is twice as easy as forcing yourself to think something that isn't true (which you may be able to do jeff but i can't) and your gonna feel twice as less like an idiot if your thinking I'm equal instead of I'm a king lol.

There's no need to think your something your not and the fact is you are equal so why not think that, it's much easier then making things up.

And i'm not going to argue with you weather people are equal or not, thats ridiculous.

 

[Chase12]

Okay listen to this man, it really made me get a different point of view in life..

if you think about whats real and whats not, just think about this... you could die today, tomorrow, next week or maybe next year... would you like to spend your life being afraid of people (cuz thats really what being shy is about, your afraid of what they might think of you, etc.), or having mad fun and just living life... your choice man..

Think about it... you know when you remember way back some situation you could have handled way better, and you regret not taking advantage of it? Well 40 years from now you could be doing the same thing, but you know what? now your here man, you can make whatever you want out of it, dont be a fool..

Remember bro, dont of it as how many numbers you got this night or how many girls you got with, because its not really about that, its about how much fun you had..

You can share the love if you dont love yourself, thank god you didnt come to this world with any diseases and ****, and if your ugly, well you can prolly fix it to a certain extent, theres really no time to cry about it, you just make sure u use what you got..

 

[jeffthechef]

So basically you like thinking you're average. We are not all equal. It's not even a debate.

as for making things up, you're not. There is no true reality, only the realities we choose to live in. So yes, any man can be a king, dj, or GOD.

Never listen to people who tell you you can't or you aren't or will never be...

 

[Analyzeit]

Any man can be a king,dj or god......................

Pull your head out of the philosophical gutter

there is no true reality......

Pretty sure there is buddy.

I'm not saying go round thinking you average i'm saying face the facts, live on the facts, then try to be the best amongst equals.

 

[jeffthechef]

"Pull your head out of the philosophical gutter

there is no true reality......

Pretty sure there is buddy.

I'm not saying go round thinking you average i'm saying face the facts, live on the facts, then try to be the best amongst equals."

LMFAO...THERE IS NO ****ING REALITY..YOU are constraining YOURSELF..and telling OTHERS TO BE AVERAGE..THERE ARE NO ****ING FACTS..

look at all the people in the world who live by facts and statistics..they settle..they have no aspirations and follow the facts...

YOU CAN'T BE THE BEST AMONG EQUALS BECAUSE YOU WILL CEASE TO BE EQUAL..THINK..you can be average..than be better than average..than THE BEST..there are no best amongst equals because everyone is ****ing equal

EVERYONE HERE SHOULD STRIVE TO BE THE BEST AMONGST ALL...being better is fine..as long as you have good intentions and use your skills/life to improve the lives of those around you

If no one was better than mj when he was young, how would he ever get better? There is always someone better but you have to be able to believe you're the best otherwise you CONFINE TO THE "FACTS" AND ALLOW THAT BETTER PERSON TO ALWAYS REMAIN ON TOP.

 

[TheEnergizer]

[because i typed all this before the last 2 posts were made (yeah it took a while lol) it doesnt really account for them. at the bottom is my reply to them after i refreshed the page to see if there were any new replies. there were.]

lol jeffthechef said something i actually agree with for once ^. except for the first paragraph that just depends on who you talk to. in my opinion theres no such thing, no ones superior or inferior nor is anyone equal. everyone is different, equality just doesnt exist. morals has nothing to do with it, nor does how many skills you have and how good you are at them, etc. both of you are wrong on that one imo.

but yeah the reality thing is true, you cant disagree that people have different realities of the world around them. its just a fact. so sometimes you can just make something up on the spot that helps. thats what i do sometimes. tell yourself whatever you want that could help and believe it. who cares if its true or not? isnt that why most people are religious? imo who needs to know why for sure, no one on this earth knows the real answers anyways, so just believe something that you'll settle with and go with it. reality is what you make of it. nothings for sure. all we have is just believing in whatever we choose and living with it. no one knows the big questions like how the universe was created and things like that. i hate people who think they do, especially if theyre religious and think its god (no offence if you are). so just stop annoying other people by being so adamant about it and just keep it to yourself. everyone has their own beliefs and they certainly dont care about yours, because neither one is true for sure as far as anyone knows. for all anyone knows life is all just a virtual reality and your the single test specimen. but thats not something id recommend believing cuz thats kinda depressing lol. so believe whatever you want just dont try to convince other people that its actually true cuz its not. it only is to you. hell you dont even have to think its true, your naive mind will fall for anything you tell it. it doesnt matter whether you think youre a near perfect brilliant center of everything or just a lowly creature in a depressing world. its all in your mind. you wanna be king, youre king, you wanna be equal, youre equal. everyone thinks different things. why shouldnt you? believe what you want, no one cares but you, just dont stick with something thats gonna be a hindrance like as analyzeit said, thinking your the king of everyone and just looking like a loser in the process. time to make up a new reality for life. or it could actually work for you and you take it the right way and end up not looking like an arrogant arse. same goes for thinking youre equal to everyone else, it could work and you could have an easy time talking to people or like jeff said you could end up thinking youre just an average joe, and you can do better than that dude . what im saying is, accept that there is no right answer. god isnt the right answer, neither is anything else. i had to point that out because so many people insist that it is and should be to everyone. just accept that everyone, even you, is wrong, but right at the same time. accept that it isnt true but at least its better than no explanation and works for you right?

sorry if that was a little deep, but thought i had to spill that one sooner or later lol. it definitely is a great and important thing to really understand because once you do, you can really start to control and change your outlook on life and experiment with different things until you get something that really works toward what you want. its just something that will really benefit you to have control over, and by it i mean you mind. if you can get your mind to believe in what you will it to believe you have total control over it and this is a very good thing.

ok now for the last 2 posts which i totally ignored in my post because it was written beforehand. analyzeit my friend... my holmez, i gotta take jeff's side on this one(partly). he's not in a philosophical gutter. he may not explain things in the best way ever (shouting at people in caps isnt the best tactic) or even have a complete and calm understanding of it, but he is on to something. i know for sure there is no true reality, and if there is, then no one out there is actually 'in' this reality because the truth is, everyone has a different reality. so its kinda impossible for there to be one true one except for the reason i just stated. (no one actually being in it). it might be sorta hard to grasp. im just trying to help you understand what im saying. if you wanna debate i'm up for it as long as we all remain calm jeff ahem and make some reasonable points. you might actually change my mind but thats kinda losing for your own side because even if you did, you would be changing my reality which would be supporting my own argument. so its kinda ironic actually. i'm not trying to argue, i just want people to understand what actually happens in peoples' minds. and if you dont, i'm fine with it, cuz i dont know you and you dont know me and we can just talk about other things that arent as deep.

hopefully this'll end this though. with any luck this will click for people and they'll get it. or maybe they wont. oh well. i hope they do. i think i explained it well enough. if i didnt then my bad. i'm really not here to debate about this or take anyone's side i'm here to give people some excellent neutral advice that they can take or leave. i actually wanted to end this debate with a well thought out unbiased post from my own point of view that everyone can hopefully accept and come to terms with. i'm just hoping people won't argue and agree with it. have a nice day. happy labor day.

 

[jeffthechef]

NO I WILL NOT ****ING BE CALM...I LOVE TO SHOUT

AND YES I DO HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS...

I actually mentioned this in my thread..the third post

right now, we're looking at the finger rather than the moon...we're trying to analyze why things are the way they are and how we should live and experience things

when we should be experiencing..simply living rather than thinking baout how...the thing is, afc's can't experience life because they're too busy thinking about hwo to do it right..when in reality the dj bible makes it pretty simple

and i could exp;alin it better and DO HAVE A CLEAR UNDERSTANDING..i simply don't want to write a ****ing 5 page report with a thesis and all that ****

...so yes, i'll agree with whatever you say..but i will defend myself..since this is a forum..

so as i mentioned, i love to shout...i love being shouted at to be honest
i'll shout and i'll speak softly..it really depends on my mood...the posts i've gained most from on this forum have been by guys who have swore and typed in caps a lot..like dbot's obey your **** post

Sometimes i do feel as though we're becoming too sensitive...at school, my teacher was told by the principal to stop yelling nad scolding as harshly though it was common in her native country..and guess what students started to slack..look at american kids in hs..even in middle school..lots of kids talk back to their parents/teachers/etc...i'm not saying we should be compliant *****es to authority..but there is a certain amount of respect they deserve..they're trying to make us better people and help us develop...yet some of us, are *****es when they yell or scold us...the guys on this forum aren't at that point..but it's evident in society...in china, the kids are so ****ing disciplined..it's amazing..the problem abotu them though, is that some of them fail to man up later on because they're so used to obeying orders..Nonetheless, chinese and other international kids are quickly taking over the higher paying jobs and getting into more competitive colleges...so as many often say..TAKE IT LIKE A MAN.

we need people to kick each other in the ass..you guys see that commercial for the chewy bars..where all the kids are putting keys in each other's backs and starting them up..it's the same idea..but instead..we need to get our foots up each other's ass to kickstart everybody:kick:

so if you see me typing in caps and swearing a lot..it's never directed at you in anger really..or hate..disdain..etc...it's me emphasizing points and enjoying my time on the forum haha..when i direct something at you, please don't take it personally..it's me trying to help you and myself...feel free to shout back and swear...sometimes i need a kick in the ass to learn something that's foreign to me...SO HAVE A ****ING GOOD DAY :flowers:

 

[Analyzeit]

I'm not arguing with your points Jeff

And I'm definitely not going to attempt to change you views on reality, it's good that you think like this but not every one can.

I'm arguing with the fact that you seem to believe everyone can mentally treat things as you do.

To the first problem me, I CAN NOT go round thinking I'm the king, i can not push myself to believe something that isn't true (some say this is why I'm a bad liar lol) but it's a good point right.

Now here's my three last questions answer them well jeff lol

VAboi has 9 posts, he's asking this question, so he's 99% AFC (might not be but i'm pretty sure you answered question as he was AFC so my point remains anyway) Now so he can pick out that this guy in not confident and very nervous, when you were an AFC and nervous and not confident could you force yourself to think you were king and actually genuinely act like it?

Now what I'm gaining from asking this is getting your perspective, do you honestly think a Nervous, not confident AFC can automatically change his views to thinking he's a king?

I say no to both the above questions, but thats my perspective, we are different people, so does that make my answer any less right then yours?

Is my giving him the facts that he's no less then these other people, and that he doesn't have to justify himself to these people (which is 100% true) worse then your made up fantasy land (sorry i say that for lack of better words lol) of going round thinking your a king (a non arrogant one)?

The way i see it being a dj is a bit about facing the simple facts

Such as my one above or the fact such as why should you be afraid of approaching, you've got nothing to lose everything to gain so why not.

If you can face these simple truths your a large jump to becoming a dj and not thinking your king, but actually being king

 

[eaglez1177]

Wow this turned out into a very interesting thread

 

[jeffthechef]

"VAboi has 9 posts, he's asking this question, so he's 99% AFC (might not be but i'm pretty sure you answered question as he was AFC so my point remains anyway) Now so he can pick out that this guy in not confident and very nervous, when you were an AFC and nervous and not confident could you force yourself to think you were king and actually genuinely act like it?"

Yes, the thing is, no one ever told me to think like it. No one told me **** about confidence and all that. So I never had a new idea. But once the idea was given to me, i ran with it. I have a strong enough mental capacity to think and KNOW it. AFC's on this forum should train their mental capabilities.

"Now what I'm gaining from asking this is getting your perspective, do you honestly think a Nervous, not confident AFC can automatically change his views to thinking he's a king?"

Why not?..."Impossible is nothing" "Just do it"

"I say no to both the above questions, but thats my perspective, we are different people, so does that make my answer any less right then yours?"

It doesn't make it less right. But in my mind, I'm still right.

Is my giving him the facts that he's no less then these other people, and that he doesn't have to justify himself to these people (which is 100% true) worse then your made up fantasy land (sorry i say that for lack of better words lol) of going round thinking your a king (a non arrogant one)?

Nope. Why preach mediocrity when we should strive to be extraordinary?
That's the problem, people follow society's beliefs. Create your own damn beliefs and rise above society. Join the elite. Now, to do this, you can't just think you're a king. You have to have or develop the same qualities. Noble, just, moral, etc...When you think you're something or someone, you should then begin to pursue to develop the same qualities. That's why you aim to be a king and not an equal, as society wishes.

The way i see it being a dj is a bit about facing the simple facts
Such as my one above or the fact such as why should you be afraid of approaching, you've got nothing to lose everything to gain so why not.
If you can face these simple truths your a large jump to becoming a dj and not thinking your king, but actually being king

No...If it was as simple as facing the facts, then there would be no afc's. The facts don't exist.

How many times have you told an afc, "Don't be afraid of approaching, you've got nothing to lose and everything to gain so why not?" And then seen them the next week on this forum asking if they should do it?

Stop telling people the same facts. Tell them to be great. "Shoot for the moon and land among the stars" Yeah true. Everyone isn't on earth anymore. Everyone is on a star. Great Great... But I say to that, "Shoot beyond the moon and land on the moon. Then you're above the stars and in good company because you are with others who aimed to be the best not just great." Now, you're gonna come back with the we're all equal ****. To which, i have already responded to in my previosu posts. We are not all equal. The problem that arises in your thinking is that you think the elite in society are the wealthy and popular. The ELITE IN SOCIETY ARE THE VIRTUOUS. VIRTUES ARE LACKING NOWADAYS SO IT'S BECOMING EASIER TO RISE ABOVE SOCIETY. I see people in hs all the time, breaking laws, breaking rules. Without one bit of shame, they proudly GOSSIP about it to their friends. I have only met a select few in high school after years who i can say are worthy of being deemed the elite of high school. And the majority of them aren't popular or rich, they come from poverty and know the true meaning of life. They know what they should be doing (studying, going to college, supporting their parents who suffered to give to them). Yet i see the popular kids. The kids that society admires. The kids that smoke, drink, lie, cheat, etc. Not all the popular kids are bad or anything. Most have good hearts yet they need more guidance because they aren't moving in the right direction. The popular kids shouldn't even hold all the blame as it's also society that deserves much of the shame for admiring these traits.

SOCIETY IN GENERAL IS A SHAME. SO RISE ABOVE IT.