Being disinterested isn't all it's supposed to be?

[Jerry Maguire]

I was reading through Pook's Be A Man article and it got me thinking.
He was advising us to act unneedy because it's the desperation that puts women off.
Well, I am kind of like this, due to being quite shy. I have a kind of sociophobia, which makes me not really want to go out with friends/girls, or really talk to them. So while I'm being quiet, unneedy and have high standards, I've had no women ask me out for a while.
I know I'm pretty good looking with an approach very similar to Pooks, so why aren't girls asking me out all the time?
Surely at least some would ask me out, whereas the truth is, nobody has for a while.

I actually have no idea what girls opinions on me are, except from one girl that's kind of a friend of me, she finds me attractive but finds my personality to be arrogant.


The thing I'm getting at is, it's all fine having this approach, and the looks, but in the end of the day, if it isn't attracting any girls to ask me out, where am I going wrong?

I have issues with my shyness, but I don't see how shyness can be distinguished from being nonchalant at first glance.

Muddled post, insight appreciated.

 

[nishbuk]

I've had no women ask me out for a while... it isn't attracting any girls to ask me out, where am I going wrong?

There's your problem right there...

 

[Jerry Maguire]

Yes, my problem's that no girls are asking me out, but why is that?

 

[johnnyrem]

Jeez. You really expect women to ask you out?

You haven't dated much, have you? You don't even know why.

Women do not like to ask men out. And you expect them to ask you anyway? Have you been living on this planet? The most women do is drop subtle "hints" which are subject to misinterpretation because they are ambiguous. Women prefer to avoid doing anything directly, so they do not ask.

Men need to ask women out if they want to date.
That's the way it is. It's not gonna change just for you.

BTW, Approach means literally that; YOU approach them. You've completely misinterpreted the meaning of the word.

So start asking, Mr. Clueless.

 

[Jerry Maguire]

lol, maybe. It's just at the start of high school a lot of pretty hot, popular girls asked me out, I suppose I was just expecting the same to follow on.

So could you explain how the disinterested/nonchalant Prince Charming portrayed by Pook can remain as uncaring, even after putting himself out there by asking out a girl? By going and asking another one just to prove that she doesn't matter?

I don't know, I've only asked 3 girls out in my life and it's hard for me but I'm just trying to understand the post a bit better.

 

[johnnyrem]

By not being deterred by rejection, and realizing that there are a lot of other fish in the sea if things don't work out.

 

[Jerry Maguire]

k, I'm beginning to understand it a bit better.
Is there any way to protect your image incase a girl rejects you? Or is it just a risk you have to take? I think if I was rejected by a girl I'd take it really personally.

 

[david_r]

dude you got the info. all wrong you have to MAKE the girl want YOU first then you can do all the uncaring stuff, and be uncaring about the girl doesnt mean you cut all sort of comunication with her, you just make yourself less available, give her time to wonder about you.

 

[RipItOff]

Options

Jer, let me ask you this:

If you had three girls that you were talking to at the same time, would you really care that much if one didn't want to go out with you?

The point is, having more options to work with will keep you less concerned about one individual girl, and that by itself will make you more desirable to all girls.

And one more thing, don't even bother asking a girl out if you don't honestly believe that she'll go out with you. This deals with your own self image, not the one you let people see. The power of belief is huge.

 

[Jariel]

Rather than being completely disinterested you need to lure these girls in, but then stay just one step out of their reach.

 

[skeeloo]

its a constant battle, especially when it comes to goodlooking guys i have said manytimes, they are fuking with your mind. girls will go outta their way to flirt with a guy they arnt interested in, to tell you they dont care about you dawg. note not every girl that shows interest is really interested, some girls can see an attractive man they know wouldnt want them and use you as a mirrior to see how attractive she is. better use your looks to your advantage and go for the girls that show you real interest. why bother with the girls that play games, dont you have enough **** in your mind(like work,school, bills and life) to bother yourself about some girl playing hot ot cold.


go to this site
pimposophy.com, it has some good **** .