"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Be upfront and straightforward

Jariel

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Not a long or revolutionary tip, but important nonetheless.

Simply put, people respect those who are straightforward and upfront. And by straightforward I do not mean blunt or confrontational! Just tell people what you want them to know.

If a woman is messing you around, there's nothing wrong with telling her "hey, I feel like you're messing me around". If you're being asked for favours and feel used, just say "I'm starting to think you're taking me for granted". No wit, no insult, no confrontation, just simple honesty...and you will be respected for it.

Of course, people will always deny using you or messing you around because it makes them look manipulative, but they know it's true and what's more, they know you're onto them.

We can't expect to share the same opinions as everyone else either so if you disagree on something, don't pretend to agree! Stop worrying about causing offence.

The trap of the "nice guy" is that they're afraid of being upfront because they fear losing approval. So they usually end up doing things to please others, yet feel used and walked over. Or they will lie or make up excuses not to do something. Others will give in because they think they'll be rewarded and then hold it over a person like a debt and get frustrated and resentful because they don't see anything in return. However, no one primised them anything.

THIS is why women dislike "nice guys" and this is why they don't feel guilty using and manipulating them. The fact is, they deserve it.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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tactic

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some girls, in fact, do like nice guys.. maybe you're speaking of those who have experience with bad boys, etc.. but good post.
 

Jizamurai

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Yea, women like nice guys... but Jariel means they usually don't feel "attracted" to them... big difference here..
 

Deus

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Heh, I'm living proof that "blunt" doesn't work :D , me being as subtle as a sledgehammer...

Well, I guess I'll try to swing the bluntness with a little more caution next time, so i'm just "upfront and straightforward" eh.

Good tip, I'll try it and bring back some feedback to ya.

//Deus
 

Duke

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Good post! A couple good "natural" players I talked to both said that what separates them from most guys is their honesty.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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