Be a "cool guy" or a "Man?" There is a BIG difference!

[jancarlo000]

I've been realizing this so much, and I need help as well, so correct me if I'm wrong. I'm been and seen a lot - men who get a lot of attention from women, and also men who get a different attention.

A cool guy is one who is always funny, animated, in a way childish and immature sometimes - at least from what I have seen - he's unapologetic on his actions, and he always follows whatever he wants to do. he gets a lot of laugh, and attention from women... this guy is very energetic... very animated... very lively... he can be a leader, and can be fun, yet not really taken seriously as much as the "man." from what i've seen, this guy usually gets the girl who is not really that "feminine" in terms of affection, submissiveness, gentleness, and the girl usually has her own world... compare this with the "man"

a man from my experience and awareness, is someone who instead of a lot of animated energy, has presence... he doesn't speak as fast as the cool guy, but he has presence... he doesn't get as much general attention as the "cool guy," lets say in a group setting, but he is the one that the women want to marry. he is seen as someone more as mature, and dependable. he is often picked to be a leader, and the king. the girls that usually are after him are the ones who are quite opposite than what the "cool guy" gets - the girl usually is a "princess" - she is submissive, gentle, affectionate, secure, and looks up to the man...

i've been bouncing between both, and have been confused a lot... these are two distinct paths...

i know i need to be the "man" but i also want the attention...

it's SOOO bad you guys that i have been so incongruent that the women have lost respect to me, so what i am going to do is start over and pick my true values and principles and stick to them.

 

[Jitterbug]

Outwardly in most social settings, I'm similar to the "cool guy" you mentioned and I'm with an ex-choir girl, the submissive type. That's the type of girls I usually date too.

I'd be similar to the "man" type in your description when I'm with a group of older folks.

Don't think your theory is very sound, mate.

Being a man doesn't mean you're boring & quiet.

 

[MisterMcGee]

"these are two distinct paths..."

No they aren't. Your theory isn't very sound, as jitter said.

 

[Furyguy]

Haha, dude I really have to say I'm amazed at how much you hit the nail on the head here. I know exactly the kinds of people you're talking about and they fit the description down to the letter. Even with the different kinds of women that go for each one.

The man doesn't speak as often, but everything he does say is golden and no words are wasted. Gives his attention sparingly so it feels like a gift when you have it. Reliable, always solves problems. I know what you mean.

Good analysis in my opinion.

 

[TheRealSupreme]

I've been realizing this so much, and I need help as well, so correct me if I'm wrong. I'm been and seen a lot - men who get a lot of attention from women, and also men who get a different attention.

A cool guy is one who is always funny, animated, in a way childish and immature sometimes - at least from what I have seen - he's unapologetic on his actions, and he always follows whatever he wants to do. he gets a lot of laugh, and attention from women... this guy is very energetic... very animated... very lively... he can be a leader, and can be fun, yet not really taken seriously as much as the "man." from what i've seen, this guy usually gets the girl who is not really that "feminine" in terms of affection, submissiveness, gentleness, and the girl usually has her own world... compare this with the "man"

a man from my experience and awareness, is someone who instead of a lot of animated energy, has presence... he doesn't speak as fast as the cool guy, but he has presence... he doesn't get as much general attention as the "cool guy," lets say in a group setting, but he is the one that the women want to marry. he is seen as someone more as mature, and dependable. he is often picked to be a leader, and the king. the girls that usually are after him are the ones who are quite opposite than what the "cool guy" gets - the girl usually is a "princess" - she is submissive, gentle, affectionate, secure, and looks up to the man...

i've been bouncing between both, and have been confused a lot... these are two distinct paths...

i know i need to be the "man" but i also want the attention...

it's SOOO bad you guys that i have been so incongruent that the women have lost respect to me, so what i am going to do is start over and pick my true values and principles and stick to them.

I disagree with your definition of a cool guy.

Go watch the old tv show Happy Days for a character called "The Fonz."

Now he was the definition of cool. He wasn't the court jester trying to get folks to laugh cause he was too cool. He didn't tap dance for people and entertain them, they did that for his attention, cause he was too cool.

The guy your talking about is a class clown or super social friendly dude. Cool guys don't talk fast. Look at the very definition of the word COOL. It is cool not hot and spicy.

 

[MoveYourAss...]

i know i need to be the "man" but i also want the attention...

it's SOOO bad you guys that i have been so incongruent that the women have lost respect to me

Seems to me you are wasting too much of your energy in trying to be something you think you should be.

Relax more and hove more fun.

 

[Alphamale1821]

While your comparison is ok it has it's flaw, imo a cool guy is one who is simply "cool" The clown, or try hard guy is the one who feels like he has to perfrom. I personally consider myself a "cool man" a combination of both. Then again i'm just CHUKE(my name) not really into labels, they in a sense are self limiting, and i have limitless potential.

 

[J Roc]

i'm a cool man

 

[Dannyrt34]

I like to think of myself as a "great guy"

 

[SXS]

a man from my experience and awareness, is someone who instead of a lot of animated energy, has presence... he doesn't speak as fast as the cool guy, but he has presence... he doesn't get as much general attention as the "cool guy," lets say in a group setting, but he is the one that the women want to marry. he is seen as someone more as mature, and dependable. he is often picked to be a leader, and the king. the girls that usually are after him are the ones who are quite opposite than what the "cool guy" gets - the girl usually is a "princess" - she is submissive, gentle, affectionate, secure, and looks up to the man...

Be carefull on being the reliable guy, my friend...

Women will use you if they think they can. I used to be that guy long time ago. I thought it was strange that girls wuold talk about other men like "Oh, I must be with him, I have to do this with him", while with me was always "Iam doing this for you because you deserve it", or things like that. Be sure they lust for you, or just go look for soemething else.

The man you are talking about is the men they wanna merry really, but never right now... Except when they need it.

And your values mean really very little when it comes to women. Unless you have cash...

 

[edu11]

I'm currently hanging out with two guys that are good with women (not puas). Before i met them i would bet that they were the class clowns and that was the reason they got laid. Now that i have, i see that they are very friendly guys who make jokes and it's just fun to be around them. They are not clowns and they certainly don't "force the ball" when it comes to jokes. Being a clown (= "forcing the ball") is a human repellent because it shows desperation and insecurity.

Just don't be afraid to make a joke if the moment feels right.

 

[Lush]

I agree with pretty much everyone here. You can be both. No one is one thing all the time. Besides, this is a bit of an abstract theory of yours and not exactly proven fact. You need to look inside and find out who you are and what makes you great. And then you need to enhance those qualities. Making what you already do awesome even better will not only be easier and faster, it will also get you laid quicker because you'll actually be a genuine person. We all know what qualities girls are looking for. There's ****ing tons of them. Take the ones you have and make them stronger. Don't worry about whether your "a man or not" because at any moment if you think you may not be a man, reach down and grab your nuts. It's been said that when a boy becomes a man is the moment he asks himself which he is. Congrats...you're a man now.

Lush.