"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Attractiveness is finding one's own spot

ilikecharlene

Senior Don Juan
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By saying finding one's own spot, I mean putting on one's best game and using it to one's advantage. I think this is true irrespective of looks, status, confidence, charisma, or any other major factor in dating terms. On many dating forums online, I see men post about how they're too "loserish" to get a date, or how they cannot imagine themselves with anybody. But it is this defeatist attitude that undermines that mentality.

I don't like PC as a concept, but I don't think it's too PC to say that looks aren't everything. Most would say they do matter, but they are not the only or sole factor in dating. A less than attractive guy, if he can play on other strengths, can easily date if he wants to. I also don't think it's PC to say that nobody is undateable. People with disabilities/disfigurements get into relationships. Serial killers do. Even historically evil people like Stalin or Hitler did. I read recently that the world's fattest man is married. If he can, then so can any healthy/normal person.

Leagues exist, it's too PC to say they don't. But they are not absolutes. Given specific conditions, a hottie woman could date an ugly man, or vice versa. A wealthy man could date a poor woman. However, generally speaking, like does attract like.

And let's be honest here, most people one sees on a regular basis (whether in shops, malls, at work, etc.) are not classically attractive. Very few women, for example, have equal looks with Kim Kardashian. But obviously, most people in the world are married, or are in some form of relationship. So looks cannot be an absolute barrier to getting a date.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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