"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

"Are you a virgin" neg from a woman after IOIs?

sneakypete

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I was in a practice room and a girl who I was hanging out with and complimenting+negging earlier decided to visit me in my practice room and said something I was playing sounded really nice, so after I say "It's not anyting, just messing around, you like it?". She stand there a minute, leaning foward and breathing through her mouth, she ask "are you a virgin" in a somewhat jarring tone, so I say "really...heh", and comment that looking trustworthy really comes in handy, and she says "don't go for any *****s, ok?". Since I didn't answer her, she might try that neg again. So what should I say back? There's not too much privacy here, so what's the safest way to escalate? I wasted too much time before acting but I was able to loosen the tension a lot with the compliment+negging, and I don't want to let it petrify. I want to nourish this avenue before going direct cause it's fun and it's building anticipation.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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trajhenkhet02

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if she asks you this more than once change up the answer. Hell ask her to tell you if she is one.
 

Smack

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It really doesn't matter, you are being far too analytical. Do you like her? That is the question, and what ultimately matters.
 

sneakypete

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So how should I proceed in upping the tension? I kind of have a crush, but I don't feel as stupid, considering I've been getting IOIs, I've heard things, and sort of odd questions that lead me to believe there's something she's interested in about me. Thing is she's number 1 on every guy's "to do" list, and I don't want to remove the tension by treating her the way she expects every guy to treat her, like a wussy.
 

Buddhist Warrior

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The main problem here I think maybe is your delivery and tone.

You can say all the greatest lines/ openers in the world. But if it still reeks like " I must have your approval so I can feel great about myself". Then it is all basicaly useless.

Its more really a question of one's inner beliefs were talking about here. Before one can take, he must learn how to give.

Women are not stupid creatures. They are 10 times as good in reading people's bodylanguage than Men.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

nightcrawler

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you probably sound like a virgin..I bet your tone and body language reflects this.

I've tried pretending I'm a virgin before to get sex but they don't believe me
 

Matty

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sneakypete said:
I was in a practice room and a girl who I was hanging out with and complimenting+negging earlier decided to visit me in my practice room and said something I was playing sounded really nice, so after I say "It's not anyting, just messing around, you like it?". She stand there a minute, leaning foward and breathing through her mouth, she ask "are you a virgin" in a somewhat jarring tone, so I say "really...heh", and comment that looking trustworthy really comes in handy, and she says "don't go for any *****s, ok?". Since I didn't answer her, she might try that neg again. So what should I say back? There's not too much privacy here, so what's the safest way to escalate? I wasted too much time before acting but I was able to loosen the tension a lot with the compliment+negging, and I don't want to let it petrify. I want to nourish this avenue before going direct cause it's fun and it's building anticipation.
You should have just turned it into a joke. It doesn't really give a direct answer, which is illusive, and proves to them you don't give a ****.
Example (poor one):
Are you a virgin?

Do animals count?

Like I said, not the craftiest example. Maintain eye contact, smile, and show decent body language, and it won't really matter that you've made a relatively stupid joke.
 
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