Are some break ups a test, what do you think about my sitauation (long story) ?

[MrWorldwide1]

Hey, college student for the past 3 years, i take care of myself, work out and eat well, always dress and look good, neat beard and nice hair, and girls always compliment me (heck even guys sometimes) i went with plenty of girls in the past few years but havent dated any cause i didnt feel the need to , so attracting women was never an issue for me .

noticed her on campus, after a while of her eyeing me all the time i decided to give it a try and approach her , ended up talking on and off she was acting hot and cold and messaging me when its convnient for her ,i got annoyed and moved on, i was ignoring her at this point, i literally would turn my head away when i see her coming my away, she messaged me few times apologizing and asking for another chance, i told her " Look I dont bother with people who annoy me and dont wanna give me the time of the day " and she basically freaked out i was gonna give up on her and apologized even harder , then i asked for her number and we went out, after the date we kept talking but i felt her getting a bit distant, i was furious and one day threw some words that hurt her, she was hurt but knew she f*cked up big time by being distant, and started basically chasing me harder, from there on it was how i would describe as amazing, we went on another date, then she invited me out on my birthday and paid for the entire dinner, we had a nice cuddling session afterwards, then another date, and another, we made out, cuddled, talked about literally everything and texted day and night, she even admitted to crushing on me so hard and really wanted to get to know me and be close to me .

i wasnt clingy at all nor needy infact she thought i was too cool and wanted me to be more emotional (i was opening up slowly, iam that kind of a guy) she asked me twice about "us" and told me she wants it to work out, and both times i told her i liked her and i see this relationship becoming something serious and i meant it i wasnt lying or making up stories i want her for real, she seemed to like my answer .... one day after meeting and chatting for an hour or so suddenly we just felt some serious urge to devour each other, we made out like crazy, kissing every inch of each others bodies, i gave her a good nip sucking action and i kid you not she was glowing afterwards, very happy and satisfied, and the next day i made sure to stay in contact and show her iam not using her just for sex, all seemed good and we kept texting and talking ....

a couple weeks after that (Due to our busy schedule) i asked her on a date, but she seemed a bit distant and hesitant, we met, had some food, sat in her car for half an hour and then she went "alright, i have stomach ache iam going home", leaned in and kissed me 'i didnt even move or object but i looked unsatisfied with her behaviour, and she picked up on that and tried to play it cool and not upset me , but i told her if she feels like going home iam not gonna stop her .

a few days later i messaged her out of curiousity and asked "what am i for you ", her response ?
Her : "Look i had a great time with you, in the begging it was amazing but i just dont find myself being able to continue doing this
youre a great guy and all but i feel were different and any thing serious will not work out between us, iam really sorry and i really wanted it to work out
but it just didnt ... "

needless to say i was pissed but kinda nice, i told her that she has no idea what she wants and can never be satisfied (which she didnt take well) but after that i messaged her some sweet and nice things and told her we had a great time, i mean no harm and wish her good luck finding what shes looking for and understand her reasons and maybe its better to end it now .
she calmed down and messaged back telling me shes sorry and iam right she doesnt know sometimes what she wants and shes sorry if she ever hurt me, and everything happened so fast and she got scared and things happened in the past and hurt her and now shes always so cautious .... basically it ended well and no one was hurt emotionally, she even asked to be friends cause she doesnt want me out of her life, i told her i will say hi when i bump into her but iam sorry we can never truly be friends because i like her .

I thought to myself "Well i guess this relationship came to an end, time to move on" and cut contact ... a couple weeks later i run into her, she waves from a far, another two weeks pass and we bump into each other again, this time she says hi and stops for a min to talk to me, next week the same happen .... the 4th time she was with her friend and i was working on an eassy in the library, she left them, walked up to me and started chatting and asking me about school and my life and giggling, and the way she looked at me, she wasnt even hearing what i was saying she was staring deeply into my eyes, and before leaving with her friendsthey stayed for a bit longer observing me from a far before leaving .


You see, i told myself that this girl told me she sees no future with me, she left and its useless to think about her (which is why i am always keeping myself busy with friends and school), but the last couple interactions were a bit weird, at least from my point of view cause when you decide to break up with someone and tell them " i see no future with you, and i dont think we can ever work out" i expect you to just do your best to stay far away from them especially if youre a girl, but she isnt exactly doing that ..... i guess iam asking for advice on what you think this means if it even means anything, we dated for 3 months and met 6 months prior to dating, i have to admit i have never literally never clicked with any girl like i did with her and i felt she had the same experience as me so the break up with abrupt and kinda weird, and then this behaviour ... not to mention that her friends literally are always staring at me whenever they see me, always following me with their eyes and watching me ...

 

[The Duke]

This is no test. She isn't interested. Be thankful you got this:

Look i had a great time with you, in the begging it was amazing but i just dont find myself being able to continue doing this
youre a great guy and all but i feel were different and any thing serious will not work out between us, iam really sorry and i really wanted it to work out
but it just didnt ... "

Women only confuse you when they aren't that into you.

 

[HankHill]

Nah. You're reading too much into it. She wants to stay friends/friendly, very typical of women especially if you see her on campus. If I were you I'd cut her off (don't tell her anything just never initiate a convo etc) if she says hi just treat her like someone who asks you the time at a Starbucks, just a casual to the point response. If my ex really wants me back she'd have to put in a good amount of effort to get my attention now.

 

[MrWorldwide1]

Nah. You're reading too much into it. She wants to stay friends/friendly, very typical of women especially if you see her on campus. If I were you I'd cut her off (don't tell her anything just never initiate a convo etc) if she says hi just treat her like someone who asks you the time at a Starbucks, just a casual to the point response. If my ex really wants me back she'd have to put in a good amount of effort to get my attention now.

I agree with every word you said, usually when i leave a girl or a girl decides to leave I cut contact and move on, this girl told me " i dont see us dating but i want you as a friend, i dont want you out of my life and i didnt know how break the news to you " .. my response was that its cool and break ups happen but we cant be friends and any true friendship will never happen between us ... and that was two months ago, as i mentioned bumped into each other 4 times but every time i treat her like someone who asks for the time at starbucks because , 1- my emotions are mine and i should be the one controlling them and moving on, 2- she made it clear what she wants so why should i even try ? I have my dignity to protect even if i love her more than anything, for me Dignity > Love , a man with no dignity is a loser, we all make compromises and overall iam a pretty nice person but sometimes you have to put a stop to it and protect yourself .

basically what iam trying to say is, iam not gonna make any effort to get her back unless she does it first( idoubt it, which is why iam improving myself and looking for another gf), and even then i will not make it easy for her, she has a lot of questions to answer before i trust her again .

 

[MrWorldwide1]

This is no test. She isn't interested. Be thankful you got this:

Look i had a great time with you, in the begging it was amazing but i just dont find myself being able to continue doing this
youre a great guy and all but i feel were different and any thing serious will not work out between us, iam really sorry and i really wanted it to work out
but it just didnt ... "

Women only confuse you when they aren't that into you.

idk about confusing me, casue i had some women act weird and show mixed signs and eventually it turned out they were head over heels for me, sometimes a little effort goes a long way (and being confident and assertive never hurts ) .

as for the rest of your answer ... yep she aint interested, she had good reasons to stay but still decide to leave, it says a lot about how much she valued me .