Anger and resentment towards women

[WrEcKLeSS2000]

Hey guys,

I'm in my mid-20's and never had a girlfriend and am still a virgin. I really want to find a quality woman that has maturity and isn't a total idiot. I've tried online dating and it has been awful beyond belief. The girls on there are so immature and skanky.

It seems to be a total joke to them. Most don't reply and when they do, they reply like they are texting and sound like total twits, then they will disappear all together. Just the other day, I sent a sarcastic message out of frustration when this woman seemed to have disappeared, then she replies and blows me off.

That really pissed me off because she is just hiding behind her keyboard like the rest of them. They are just ghosts and nobodies to me.


I just want to have a meaningful relationship with a woman who isn't a total twit. Honestly, this generation seems to have produced the largest load of texting anti-social immature skanks and they are not being held accountable for their behavior. So they just keep on acting this way.


Honestly, I'm just really pissed off right now because I've been told that I'm good looking and a "nice" guy but I have so much trouble meeting a woman in person because I'm working all the time and don't have as much time anymore.


I have high standards but there is just so much crap out there and I always seem to run into the worst of the worst.


I'm just hoping for some advice to put things in perspective because I am really angry and sick of these idiot women. They are only good for one thing and that is getting laid. Maybe it's a bit sexist but I think women are taking advantage of men and getting away with it too much because of wimpyness and beta behavior and online dating where they have all the power.

 

[Desdinova]

I'm in my mid-20's and never had a girlfriend and am still a virgin. I really want to find a quality woman that has maturity and isn't a total idiot.

Should you REALLY be picky at this point? What you need to do is go out there and start interacting with women. You need to gain experience on how to make them attracted to you so when you DO find a quality woman, you'll have the necessary skill and experience to attract her, keep her attracted, and satisfy her in the bedroom. With no experience on how to do any of that, you cannot expect a woman like this to just fall from the sky. It's like going onto a baseball field expecting to hit a home run when you've never even played the game.

I've tried online dating and it has been awful beyond belief. The girls on there are so immature and skanky.

And how many of them have you dated? I've dated five women from the internet and NONE of them have been skanky. Four out of five of them were quite nice.

Most don't reply and when they do, they reply like they are texting and sound like total twits, then they will disappear all together.

You should NEVER rely on online dating to be your only source of meeting new women. If you cannot attract a woman in the real world, you won't be able to attract a woman on the internet. You should ONLY use online dating during the hours when you cannot get out in the real world to meet them.

I will tell you the odds of getting a date off the internet. I have to message somewhere between 25 and 50 women for one date. Do NOT expect the first ten women you message to fall for you.

I'm just hoping for some advice to put things in perspective because I am really angry and sick of these idiot women. They are only good for one thing and that is getting laid.

You have absolutely no right to say this about the women you're "meeting" because you're still a goddam virgin. You wouldn't be one if they were good for getting laid, now would you?

 

[WrEcKLeSS2000]

Thanks for the reply.

I am just very frustrated lately. I've been in a huge rut. You are right, I completely agree with just about everything you said. I shouldn't rely on online dating so much. Those odds are pretty bad.

I guess my biggest problem is that I get friend zoned all the time in person and that contributes to my annoyance and anger. I have no game and that is something I need to work out. I'm pretty clueless in terms of attracting women which is pretty evident.

Forget online dating, I'm talking about in person. I don't know how to attract women and the more I try, the more I keep failing.

I have alot of work ahead of me. I just get really scared that I will be alone forever and being a virgin is not the easiest thing to deal with. I don't want to miss out on the prime of my sex life in my 20's.

 

[btownbuck2012]

Hey Mods,

delete this. my bad.

 

[backbreaker]

Hey OP,


Besides being a super smooth lady killer in my spare time, I'm also a drug addict. Recovering/recovered drug addict, actually my 8th year anny was 5 days ago on the 12th.

The reason I'm telling you this is beucase a big reason I used drugs, well not used but became a daily user to the point where I had to have my drug of chioce was beucase i was extremely angry at everyone and I had bad resentment issues. The biggest thing you do in AA/Recovery is to deal with the resentments and angers that you have towards others. We all have them. My father tried to have sex with a woman i was living with and was thinking about becoming engaged to. This after I took him in after his wife kicked him out the house. My mother has disowned me, more than once, fot the simple reason that i dont' believe in the same god that she believes in. I had resentments against my grandparents, friends, women, associates, clients, you name it i had it. ****, alot of them were justifiable.

This is something we talk about in AA alot which is why I am drawing on this particular type of experience, but what you have to understand OP to bring this back to the specific post about women is that, even if you wanted to, you can't change ****. Acceptance is the key to all your problems.


You have to accecpt people for who they are and just as importantly, who they aren't. Let me ask you this, at the end of the day after you are done talking with these girls do you thiunk they give one ounce of thought to the fact that you think they are silly or shallow. do you think they honeslty give a **** what you think? Or do you think they are giong out doing their own thing not giving a **** what you think. I understand your frustrations, I would not have found this forum in the first place if I didn't, but you can't let people rent space in your head like that.

I usually don't do this but there is a passage in the big book that I think hits home with your issue and i'm going to paste it here.

Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way. If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous. He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing. On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits.

What usually happens? The show doesn't come off very well. He begins to think life doesn't treat him right. He decides to exert himself more. He becomes, on the next occasion, still more demanding or gracious, as the case may be. Still the play does not suit him. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying. What is his basic trouble? Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well? Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants? And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate, snatching all they can get out of the show? Is he not, even in his best moments, a producer of confusion rather than harmony?

You have to first and foremost give up trying to place YOUR expectations on other people. I'm not saying that things aren't hard, I'm saying you should never get to the point where you allow your self to become angry and bitter about someone else's mindset or actions for the simple reason that they don't coincide with what you want.

Your problem in reality is that you are the exact same thing that you say you don't want. I don't mean this in a negative way but you are being selfish and inconsiderate of others. These people are happy doing what they want to do. Your problem is that you want everyone to do what you want them to do so that you can be happy


the FIRST thing you need to do, is to learn to accecpt people, and situations for exactly what they are and not getting angry about it. Until you do this, nothing positive is going to happen for you.

I don't want to miss out on the prime of my sex life in my 20's.

:crackup:

 

[WrEcKLeSS2000]

Hey OP,


You have to accecpt people for who they are and just as importantly, who they aren't. Let me ask you this, at the end of the day after you are done talking with these girls do you thiunk they give one ounce of thought to the fact that you think they are silly or shallow. do you think they honeslty give a **** what you think? Or do you think they are giong out doing their own thing not giving a **** what you think. I understand your frustrations, I would not have found this forum in the first place if I didn't, but you can't let people rent space in your head like that.



the FIRST thing you need to do, is to learn to accecpt people, and situations for exactly what they are and not getting angry about it. Until you do this, nothing positive is going to happen for you.

:crackup:

I'm sure they are not thinking about the interaction that they had with me and they totally forgot and are onto doing something else probably right after the message which is what I should be doing.

You are totally right. I need to be cool about things and not get angry. These people are totally unimportant. They don't care or think about me so I shouldn't think about them.

Sometimes, it just gets tough. I'm really looking for companionship. I've been a labeled a nice guy since forever and I'm trying to shed that image but it seems like acting like a douche online isn't helping either. I'm always getting friend zoned. I'm going to stop this online crap and get out more and try to meet women in person even if I have to go by myself.

 

[yyc12]

I'm always getting friend zoned.

Are you actually pursuing these women from the beginning or are you waiting around trying to build something first? Are you pretending to be friends while wanting more? I don't get how someone can be friends with someone they secretly want more from.

 

[WrEcKLeSS2000]

Wreckless2000 I hate to start beating you especially when you're already down, but you've been on this site for 11 years and you're still a virgin with no prospects?? how is this even possible?

This site is an absolute gold mine of information and tells you exactly what you need to do to avoid getting friendzoned, and how to be more sexual and direct. Are you not applying anything you've read here?

You need to work on yourself here. You need to be the best person you can be, and you need to find more positive places to meet women. I happen to be great at online game, but if you're not good at it either (1) find some good pics and get better at gaming women through online discussion, or start joining some clubs where you meet them. Are you still in school? That's a great place to meet them. Start meeting more friends, outgoing guys are often a great way to meet even more people, and when you're in the dumps a lot of the time watching your friends pick up women can be a great motivator. When i was in my teens one of my best teachers was going out with older guys and watching them in action as they picked up chicks, it showed me how easy it was, and that if they could do it, i could do it too.

You need to improve your looks, get rid of this negative attitude, and maybe your expectations and standards are a little too high. I mean, it's good to have high expectations but if you're getting absolutely zero women and you're upset about it then you need to lower your limits a bit until you get good at it and can then raise the bar.

I haven't been active on this site in a long time. I originally was most active during my teens in high school and I improved considerably. I guess you can say ever since I left this site for a long period of time, I've fallen back into AFC behavior and total frustration.

At this point, I'm going to get more caught up with the Don Juan lifestyle again. I'm going to have to transform myself and stop all this desperation and neediness that I am displaying.


I'm not in school anymore but I have a full time job which is great. I really don't have too many friends at this point. I had some friends but we drifted apart. I need to go to more organizations and meet people.

It's not easy to make friends. People are really busy and it takes time to establish a friendship with someone and the person has to friendly as well. Can't be one-sided.

I think it's important to stop this online "zero date" nonsense for a while and go out in the real world and have some fun and talk to some women even if I have to go out by myself.