"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Advice please

vorbis

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 18, 2005
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Location
Boston
I feel that slowly but surely I'm getting better with women, at least I hope so.

So anyways, I met this girl(HB7.5) in a bar / club 2 weeks back on a Saturday. It was her birthday and I ended going back to her friend's place. We slept on the couch and I got as far as fingering her. She seemed up for more but kep worrying about someone walking in on us.

I rang her on the following Monday to try and meet up on Thursday. She said she wouldn't be in Boston till Friday and wasn't sure what she would be doing. I then rang her on the Friday (Paddy's day) and she was driving, she said she'd ring me back. She never did. I was set to give up on her as IL seemed to be fading.

A friend said I should show persistence and ring her again. I did last night and left a voicemail. No response. This evening, I sent her a text saying I shouldn't have bothered trying to ring her and telling her to have a nice life. 20 mins later I get a text from her saying "my bad, I had a crazy busy week".

Whats the deal? Do ye think she's interested. I think I was probably coming on a bit strong before. She was nice but I'm pursuing other prospects as well so its not as if I'm building her up in my mind.
Thanks
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bourne

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 26, 2005
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453
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I would stop calling her. Let her call you and chase you. You did more than enough and she didn't recipricate.
 

S1NN3R

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2006
Messages
680
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Location
Loss Vaygus, NV
The only time you get any attention from her is when you threaten to stop giving her your attention. Walk away.

At best you have a maintenance relationship, where she gives you just enough to keep you interested just in case she's hard up sometime. At worst, she's using you solely for the purpose of feeling better about herself in that she has all of these guys lusting after her constantly (you know you're not the only one, right?).

Either way, cease contact for a week. If she hasn't called (TXTs don't count) by then, delete the number.
 

Blackdragon5095

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 19, 2005
Messages
453
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vorbis said:
I feel that slowly but surely I'm getting better with women, at least I hope so.

So anyways, I met this girl(HB7.5) in a bar / club 2 weeks back on a Saturday. It was her birthday and I ended going back to her friend's place. We slept on the couch and I got as far as fingering her. She seemed up for more but kep worrying about someone walking in on us.

I rang her on the following Monday to try and meet up on Thursday. She said she wouldn't be in Boston till Friday and wasn't sure what she would be doing. I then rang her on the Friday (Paddy's day) and she was driving, she said she'd ring me back. She never did. I was set to give up on her as IL seemed to be fading.

A friend said I should show persistence and ring her again. I did last night and left a voicemail. No response. This evening, I sent her a text saying I shouldn't have bothered trying to ring her and telling her to have a nice life. 20 mins later I get a text from her saying "my bad, I had a crazy busy week".

Whats the deal? Do ye think she's interested. I think I was probably coming on a bit strong before. She was nice but I'm pursuing other prospects as well so its not as if I'm building her up in my mind.
Thanks
I like I told a friend who said this 1 girl is acting wired.

Don't Chase Them, Replace Them.
 

coolguy676767

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 27, 2005
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reply sometime later, not immediately later, with:

You had a busy week, well I had a busy week as well, but that doesnt mean I dont have the time to return a call when I say I am going to. So if you want to get something going your gonna have to work at it, cause for now I am done contacting you first, but I MIGHT give you the oppurtunity to make it up to me if you wanna try to start something up again.

Capitilize MIGHT,

Most DJ's on here would say to next her already and dont even send this message. My idea is that this message could not hurt, either she doesnt ever call you again which would happen either way, or she calls you again and you **** her and then next her which is better, so you dont have much to lose her. If she replies it might be a *****y one telling you that you have a bad attitude, to which you ignore, or she tries to chase you, which you let her do and for the whole rest of the time you know her you have to keep her chasing you like that, otherwise she will immediately lose interest again.

If she sets something up, cancel on her, she sets it up again, be like 10/20 minutes late, she calls you, dont call back for at least like 1 and a half/2 days.

It might be worth a shot, but when it gets to this point chances of ultimate success in the end are pretty low, so dont spend much effort on it at all, and make sure it never gets in your way of DJ'ing other girls.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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