A Sex Worker Shares Why Men Pay For Sex

[SW15]

This is the TED Talk mentioned in the first post.

At 4:57, Nicole Emma says that "men believe their value is in their money, their muscles, and their mojo"

Does that sound familiar?

Rollo Tomassi has often said "Money, Muscles, and Game"

3 Attached men who have sex available at home but simply need variety in terms of women or preferences.

That's a legitimate 3rd segment of men. Some of those men in that 3rd segment have enough Game to get extra-relational sex through more conventional means. Some men in this segment would find it more convenient to get their side sex through direct payment and not approaching or swiping.

 

[corrector]

That's a legitimate 3rd segment of men. Some of those men in that 3rd segment have enough Game to get extra-relational sex through more conventional means. Some men in this segment would find it more convenient to get their side sex through direct payment and not approaching or swiping.

Really?

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Do you remember a random cashier you spoke with 8-10 years ago.

Not random cashiers. But I do remember plenty of friendly workers I interacted with from over a decade ago.

Yet I write about just two escorts I visited 9 years ago like they were yesterday.

Your experience is not the experience of others.

However, I think you are missing my point on purpose to justify spending money on hookers, which, of course, is none of my business.

 

[corrector]

Not random cashiers. But I do remember plenty of friendly workers I interacted with from over a decade ago.

That is too vague.

Your experience is not the experience of others.

Everyone has different experiences so why bother discussing anything then?

However, I think you are missing my point on purpose to justify spending money on hookers, which, of course, is none of my business.

Your point is only valid by your own experience.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

That is too vague.

Then let me be specific.

I still remember specific conversations and interactions with staff members from over a decades ago.

The words we said, the context etc.

Everyone has different experiences so why bother discussing anything then?

That's the whole reason for message boards like this.

To discuss all the different experiences we have.

And my experience is that cash exchange based transactions don't need to be sexual to create a lasting impression and a very human, albeit contextual, experience.

And that only "sexual" exchanges allow for that is a false point.

Your point is only valid by your own experience.

Everybody's point is only valid by their own experiences.

My original point is very simple.

Financial transactions do not need to be sexual in order to create a lasting impression or a contextual feeling of an authentic connection.

The TED talk lady's point, therefore, I disagree with.

But as you said, this is my own experience.

And, as you said, your own opinion on the matter is based on your experiences.

 

[corrector]

Then let me be specific.

I still remember specific conversations and interactions with staff members from over a decades ago.

The words we said, the context etc.



That's the whole reason for message boards like this.

To discuss all the different experiences we have.

And my experience is that cash exchange based transactions don't need to be sexual to create a lasting impression and a very human, albeit contextual, experience.

And that only "sexual" exchanges allow for that is a false point.



Everybody's point is only valid by their own experiences.

My original point is very simple.

Financial transactions do not need to be sexual in order to create a lasting impression or a contextual feeling of an authentic connection.

The TED talk lady's point, therefore, I disagree with.

But as you said, this is my own experience.

And, as you said, your own opinion on the matter is based on your experiences.

The staff were your coworkers? You were on the same job? How was your example a financial transaction comparable to using an escort.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

3 Attached men who have sex available at home but simply need variety in terms of women or preferences.

I have a very good looking girlfriend which not only never turn down sex but more often than not initiates herself to the point where sometime I have to find ways to skip it.

Despite that I still feel the desire to bang those hot chicks from the gym, the girl working in the cafeteria and many more I see around just like when I was single.

As men we can fight many dangerous battles and win but fighting against our own biology is beyond the limit.

Then why not just be single and not have to worry bout all of that?

It is easy to justify cheating...but it should be even easier to not get involved in a monogamous relationships and thus having to fight these urges to not cheat, while at thr same time running the risk of being cheated on.

 

[NealIRC]

There are very few instances of free sex and they are more outlier type cases. Men either pay for sex directly or indirectly. A man can be an incel for more conventional means of sex but able to get sex by directly paying for it.

Here are examples of ways that men pay for sex indirectly.

1. Buying a Rolex or other luxury watch brand to get attention from women.

Will a Rolex Get You Laid? Will a Rolex Help You Get a Longer Term Girlfriend?

it’s mostly other men who notice the watch. Men are more likely to notice watches and cars, though men have a propensity to think watches and cars will get them female attention. I feel that girls notice my whip ,shoes and tallness more than the watch though. My sense is that a Rolex...

www.sosuave.net

2. Buying a luxury level brand car vs. having an adequate car (in car dependent cities)

Car Ownership and Game

Since we have Home Ownership and Game here, car ownership and game seems like a natural accompanying thread. Simply put, has your car helped you get laid more, either through securing more short term bangs or help you achieve more extended boyfriend-girlfriend type relationships? If so, which...

www.sosuave.net

Any car ownership costs with the luxury level brand would also be associated with getting laid

3. Buying a boat
4. Buying real estate/renting a more expensive apartment in order to impress women with a bachelor pad
5. Any sort of fitness cost. This could be a gym membership. Some gyms are inexpensive whereas others are expensive. Some men even get more expensive personal training to have a better physique to get them laid. Sport training lessons like tennis lessons or surfing lessons can be indirect costs for getting laid.

Men do all this before a 1st or 2nd date?

 

[NealIRC]

Sex worker visitors are not a uniform group. When I think about it, there are 2 main groups.

1. Attached men (usually married) who are lacking sex
2. Unattached men who are lacking sex

Hmm, I'd like to see someone do 1 for sex workers. Can there be upper-class women who are also sex workers, but would be for very different reasons.

 

[SW15]

Men do all this before a 1st or 2nd date?

Men don't do all of those things, but they'll do some of them. I have upgraded apartments in part to impress women.

Hmm, I'd like to see someone do 1 for sex workers. Can there be upper-class women who are also sex workers, but would be for very different reasons.

Sex workers are also not a uniform group.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

How was your example a financial transaction comparable to using an escort.

When I said a "financial transaction" I meant me buying something from a shop, and training money for services.

And none of these were me and other people working at the same shop.

But they all did involve me creating "authentic relationships" with people who worked at shops that I frequented.

For example, for a while I would go running every morning and end up at a donut shop a block from my house.

I developed a very "flirty" relationship with the cute college girl who worked there.

And this only involved me paying for a cup of coffee.

Another example is the lady I used to see to get my hair cut from.

We had a very friendly, "flirty" relationship that I still remember today, more than 20 years later, just like the donut girl.

We talked about many things and our own personal lives, etc., a very "authentic relationship" that didn't require any sexual encounters.

My point is very simple.

You don't need see an escort to create an "authentic connection."

These kinds of "authentic connections" happen all the time between staff and customers.

So again, my point is that TED talk lady doesn't provide anything that normal humans can't get anywhere else.

And again, she's trying to spin "being a hooker" as being a noble profession that provides men with what they can't get elsewhere.

However, I understand that some folks are not socially capable of creating relationships with normal people (bartenders, donut girls, barbers) and see hookers for that purpose.

But I would guess that most dudes don't see hookers because they lack relationship building skills.

It's because they want to easily and efficiently bust a nut into an eager cooch.

And I would also argue that nut busters make up the bulk of TED Talk lady's customers.

 

[corsica]

I thought TED talks were cool when I was young and fool.

A prostitute teaching us about connection? Clown world at its finest.

 

[NealIRC]

Sex workers are also not a uniform group.

That's the point..