A Question for the experienced

[Tommy87]

I need help. I have no problem most of the time getting girls number. It's just I don't know what to do with them when I have them. I am too self concious and because of lack of experience, I am afraid that they will look down on me. Is there a natural order of things after you get a girls number? I am always afraid of being too needy and interested, so I act reserved and distance which of course never works. I am not a bad looking guy that lacks a personality I am just too self concious and inexperienced. So a confidence boost and advice would be much appreciated.
Thanks so much.

 

[Metaphysical]

why would these women look down on you for getting their numbers? you are a man and they are women. it's natural to want to fvck them..

 

[Igetit!]

I don't understand why you would think that the girls would look down on you.
Why would they do that? How is it that you have the confidence to approach a woman who you've never met before,risk rejection in asking for her number with no hesitation at all,but calling her up and suggesting getting together sometime frightens you? I don't get that one man. Look,just wait a day or two,and with the same confidence that you approached and asked for her number,simply ask her out. But DON'T say,"Do you wanna go out sometime?". That's lame. Let her know that you are going to such and such place,then invite her to come along. The impression you want her to get is that you ALREADY had plans to do something,that even before you met her,you were going to go to this place. And since you already had plans,you are just inviting her to come along. Oh,and one more thing. You should base your confidence on yourself as a person,not on whether some chick who you've never met before agreeing to a date with you.

 

[slaog]

I need help. I have no problem most of the time getting girls number. It's just I don't know what to do with them when I have them. I am too self concious and because of lack of experience, I am afraid that they will look down on me. Is there a natural order of things after you get a girls number? I am always afraid of being too needy and interested, so I act reserved and distance which of course never works. I am not a bad looking guy that lacks a personality I am just too self concious and inexperienced. So a confidence boost and advice would be much appreciated.
Thanks so much.

Eliminate the fear and negative thinking. What are you afraid of? Afraid they won't like you? If your fear is in control then you won't get the chance to find out if they like you or not.

When people don't like you don't take it personally. Just accept everybody is different and some people get on better with others. A goth girl would more likely go for a goth guy even if the other non-Goth option was nicer, had better personality and had more money.


Instead of focusing on your bad points focus on your good points. Be more positive.


2 things for you to keep in mind
1 - Assume attraction. Check the link in my signature. You're assuming the worst.
2 - Be more positive. What you focus on expands. You think negatively of yourself so think more positive.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

You are over analyzing yourself and worrying too much about you fvcking up. Just have fun, ask questions about the girl and whatever else.. Just enjoy being with her and have fun! That's all its about.

 

[Tommy87]

Thanks alot guys this has helped me.