a lil thing i was thinkin about earlier

[aKademIKS KIDD]

hey, this is a great site to get into...but i was thinking a lil bit after i read a couple articles/threads, one of the qualities i picked up on this site, was strategically being unavailable to the girl at certain times, to keep her wanting you, (not always returning calls, drawing them to you, not being the ***** in the relationship) basically, reserving yourself as to not completely give yourself to the girl.
but with this doesnt it make the girl kinda iffy as to why hes not always there? some girls love it when a guy is "always" there for them, and if your not there, wont she look for comfort elsewhere?
i understand why you should play your part and be more of the man in the relationship but it just got me thinkin about the other side, me personally, i tend not ALWAYS be there just so she appreciates it more when i am, but my main question is, how unavailable should a guy be?

 

[spider_007]

1) It's not a matter of being there it is the matter of being a man. You are independent, you have your own life, a buissy life; job, hobbies, friends, family..... it's a great life. A fun life. A life with out a dull moment. And if you don't, you wana come across that way because that to a women is VERY attractive. Second off all, waiting by the phone for her to call is the perfect recepy to end up in a "friends zone". Makes you look wussy, like you got notting better to do. like she is the center of your life. even tho the woman say they want that, every nice guy that did that, never got any azz from her.

2) remember, some chicks have 2-3 call rule, if you don't reply after the second call, they say next. No need to worry, and no need to play phone games. If you'r buissy, great, if you happend to pick up the phone, grat. Just don't seam like you have no life.

3) as for the comment, that you wana be there for her. trust me, you don't. that is another way to got in the "friends zone" if she needs comfort or somebody to be there for her, she can call her gurllfriends, or wussy guyfriends. You wana be there for fun times, hanging out, drining.................. you know, fun.....

 

[MoonieTX]

That is one of the big messages on this board, be your own man. That is what cost me my last relationship and a lot of confidence too. I was completely ***** whipped.

I have started seeing this new girl, who is pretty cool. But, she has started the I gotta see you every night even if it is for only 5 minutes blah blah. I told her straight off Monday I wouldn't see her Tuesday, I had stuff to do at home, the truth. But, she texts me all day, I gotta see ya, I kept saying no. Then she leaves me a message, I am at dinner with a friend and she would love to meet you. I didn't call her back until 3 hours later, then she tries the I had a chance to go out with some guys who are in town looking for a good time, but I didn't. So, I told she should have gone and had a good time, this was hard to say. This changed her mind set, she was all apologetic for calling me and trying to get me out etc. Then told me as she didn't see me last night, she would have to make it up to me with a special treat tonight.

I wish I had found this site a lot sooner, it really opened my eyes to what a complete wuss I was in my last LTR. I am nice guy and would give a friend the shirt off my back, but sometimes you have harden yourself to get what YOU want and not what SHE wants.

 

[frivolousz21]

being your own man is great and all..but you dont have to play as if you are saving the world..more as you are in control of your decisions and actions

 

[spider_007]

Unless your are really outhere saving the world

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by aKademIKS KIDD
hey, this is a great site to get into...but i was thinking a lil bit after i read a couple articles/threads, one of the qualities i picked up on this site, was strategically being unavailable to the girl at certain times, to keep her wanting you, (not always returning calls, drawing them to you, not being the ***** in the relationship) basically, reserving yourself as to not completely give yourself to the girl.
but with this doesnt it make the girl kinda iffy as to why hes not always there? some girls love it when a guy is "always" there for them, and if your not there, wont she look for comfort elsewhere?
i understand why you should play your part and be more of the man in the relationship but it just got me thinkin about the other side, me personally, i tend not ALWAYS be there just so she appreciates it more when i am, but my main question is, how unavailable should a guy be?

You should be as unavailable as you are.

REAL men do not play "hard to get". They do not "make themselves unavailable". They have a life going on that revolves around them and not some girl. MAKING yourself unavailable just to win her affection is as stupid as showering her with gifts. It still puts the focus of your action on HER.

When someone says, "Don't be so available", what they're really saying is, "Get a life".

 

[aKademIKS KIDD]

haha alrite good lookin out guys...thanks mucho

 

[JackPrescott]

Originally posted by MoonieTX
That is one of the big messages on this board, be your own man. That is what cost me my last relationship and a lot of confidence too. I was completely ***** whipped.

I have started seeing this new girl, who is pretty cool. But, she has started the I gotta see you every night even if it is for only 5 minutes blah blah. I told her straight off Monday I wouldn't see her Tuesday, I had stuff to do at home, the truth. But, she texts me all day, I gotta see ya, I kept saying no. Then she leaves me a message, I am at dinner with a friend and she would love to meet you. I didn't call her back until 3 hours later, then she tries the I had a chance to go out with some guys who are in town looking for a good time, but I didn't. So, I told she should have gone and had a good time, this was hard to say. This changed her mind set, she was all apologetic for calling me and trying to get me out etc. Then told me as she didn't see me last night, she would have to make it up to me with a special treat tonight.

I wish I had found this site a lot sooner, it really opened my eyes to what a complete wuss I was in my last LTR. I am nice guy and would give a friend the shirt off my back, but sometimes you have harden yourself to get what YOU want and not what SHE wants.

You can still be a nice guy and get laid, you just have to be nice to women the one you want, cant stand in front of her!