"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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A bit stuck.

voyageur101

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So I met this 7.9 B at school through a friend, it all happened during a noisy event but we still had a bit of conversation. I spontaneously chose to ask for the girls AOL Instant Messenger name, and she gave it to me.

A few days later, I instant message her, and after a brief exchange invite her to lunch with me. She says no, because she already has plans with friends. I talk a bit more, and then get offline.

Maybe about 6 days later, I instant message her again, this time I ask for her phone number, she also declines. Then we start talking about other things, and I end up flirting with her a bit. She seems receptive, and generally makes conversation. I only wish I could talk to her on the phone...:mad:

Now my question is, am I wasting my time, or should I ask her out somewhere else a few days after the second conversation? If so, should I do it online? Or do I insist on getting her number?

It would be very hard for me to spontaneously meet her in person somewhere, since she lives a bit far from me.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Ratisson

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u aske her out and she says she is busy doing something with her friends, people she has been friends with for 10-20yrs and who she will probably be friends wioth for the rest of her life. guy, i think this girl just doesnt dig u. U are wasting ur time. Since she didnt want to give u her phone number it means that she just isnt interested. Find a new chick to party with. Forget her, delete her from ur MSN and stop contacting her because it just isnt going to happend. Sorry, i dont mean to be a d!ck, its just that that is the truth of the matter.
 

ViensViens

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Your antics are hopeless. She clearly does not like you.

But of course, she has the courtesy to accept your invitation for Friendship. She has no interest in you romantically.

Or perhaps the girl is warding off negativity.
It seems like there must be something wrong with you, voyageur. Examine yourself, because maybe your soulless insides reflect a deviant visage. Sorry to sound spiteful, but maybe you come off as a fraud because you are one.

Fraus omnia corrumpit. Fraud unravels all.
 

Ramon04

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Asking for a date or her number too soon can also kill off her interest. Of course, some may say that she has already made up her mind about you in the first few seconds of meeting you. And that if she declines early on it means that she would not have given you her number later either. Don't know how much truth is in that.

It seems that some girls do not want to feel too slutty by giving out numbers to people they did not get to know at least somewhat well. That is, talking about stuff and not asking her for the number in the second sentence. Especially on the net, it seems well advised to first talk a bit with the ladies and only then ask for the phone number... It will be just more relaxed and authentic that way.
 

ViensViens

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Sure he has the tactics all wrong.

But maybe on a more profound level, he is not an attractive person on the inside. Females can sense a rotten, fraudulent pansy. Maybe you are on of those. Maybe.. You should examine yourself before you enter a relationship next time.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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DJ Alejandro

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lose her. or use her ---- as a pivot, of course. :)
 

ViensViens

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You're not getting anywhere in life. This, I assure you, and everyone listening to me on this bloody pulpit.
 
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