"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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    I have been messing around with a woman that has a boyfriend and has a child with him. They live together and she tells me that she is no longer attracted to him and that she is not happy with him. She talks about how miserable her life is with him. She is the breadwinner in the family, does...
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