Looking attractive vs Being attractive (The actual REAL Don Juan)

[tksniper]

Looking attractive (without substance):

6 pack abs.
Handsome face.
Tall.
Rich.
Popular.
Sometimes stuck in his head because he’s constantly seeking external validation.
Seeks to be blessed by the gods.
Takes himself too seriously.
Is constantly “me focused”.
Is constantly judging others.

Being attractive:

Giving value to others.
Positive attitude and mindset.
Tranquil state.
Completely out of his head because he has no need for external validation. He is internally validated.
Seeks to be a BLESSING to others.
Doesn’t judge others because he has enough empathy to realize he once made those same mistakes.
Doesn’t take himself seriously at all.
Is focused on others and not completely self absorbed.

Now let’s take away the whole male-female attraction paradigm. Let me ask you ask you some questions….Who do you want think has more value? Who do you think is more giving? Who do you think people like to be around more? And most importantly, who would you rather have a beer and chill with?

I rest my case. *Drops mic*.

Now here’s the real caveat. A handsome man who exemplifies all the qualities in the “being attractive” quadrant is a real life Don Juan. He won’t even need to approach women. Women seduce HIM. He is HIM. This guy is rare. But who knows, maybe you can be him. Hit the gym and upgrade your looks and riches but try to stay humble and value giving.

I solved it for you guys so that you guys don’t have to do any thinking.

Now go ahead and create the love life you want. You know what you need to do.

 

[BaronOfHair]

There's truth to all that, @tksniper One can even observe this on a macrolevel:

The history of cinema(especially here in The US)is littered with billions of handsome yet anodyne fellas(Josh Lucas, Casper Van Dien, almost every bloke who starred on a long-running teen soap opera... The list could drag on)who were never considered especially sexy, didn't have the talent to get very far

 

[tksniper]

There's truth to all that, @tksniper One can even observe this on a macrolevel:

The history of cinema(especially here in The US)is littered with billions of handsome yet anodyne fellas(Josh Lucas, Casper Van Dien, almost every bloke who starred on a long-running teen soap opera... The list could drag on)who were never considered especially sexy, didn't have the talent to get very far

Thank you, you made my point. My biggest fear was I might be advocating being a nice guy because all of these attributes to being a great guy looks “nice.” The proper word would be “love.” Love of self and others. And love can be fierce. Love would defend with violence if it had to.

 

[Prepostereax]

Funny, I was thinking this just yesterday.
I'd noticed these billboards peddling everyday stuff, and the guys in them weren't good looking, but attractive, if that makes sense.
They look open, friendly, approachable.
Genuine and relatable.
Just as you say, someone you could chill with.

Sure, if a woman had the option, she'd choose to bang a broccoli head over them.
Then again, maybe not..
(ie only a chill broccoli head. Most lookmaxxers seem way too into themselves)
And if one of those billboard dudes approached, only the bitchiest female would turn them away.

Advertising knows.
Be your own walking billboard

 

[Kinetic]

Attractiveness is mostly a mindset. I've seen so many men and women that seem sculpted by the Gods yet have a aura of desperation and neediness for approval. They may get some initial attention but it fades quickly when that inner neediness leaks out into the interaction. True power and attraction comes from within.