Should threads be approved before posting?

[ManFromTartarus]

This forum and website has a lot of great things going for it, giving men a place to learn, grow, and discuss matters of interaction with the opposite sex. But all too many times they devolve into a trolling/pissing matches over vastly different views, overly authoritarian advice given by inexperienced DJ's, and some threads that are so poor they amount to nothing more than clickbait.

Having threads reviewed and approved by the moderators would be going in a socialist/communist direction, and I doubt they would have the time for it, but I think and feel it might make this forum significantly better, and avoid all the trolling/bickering going on at times.

What say you?

 

[kavi]

I dont know about this. Online forums and discussions can be toxic places at times. Mods and admins can be in a difficult position. Too much censorship however is not good. So I think freedom is good but mods can shut down threads they dont think have value. But if mods have too much control like for instance approving threads it can make their work harder and also contributors wont feel welcome to talk openly.

 

[Luni]

free speech absolutist, leave it be

 

[Gamisch]

I think the power of the forum is the fact that we are free to post whatever.

E.g: a man goes through a break up. Most members would say what we all know. Yet he has trouble to let go and keeps posting about this one woman. By letting him post OTHER men can see what ot looks like to be in the heat of the moment of a heartbreak. If you moderate it the moderator might feel like a certain topic is "not good " ,while it could've been something the next member desperately needed to hear.

Just one example. There are many more. Last thing you wanna create is an echo chamber where only "true manly RP proven men" can post. Because everyone has his own path to becoming a DJ. Some need more time, content, and life lessons before they get it.

If anything, men should MAN up and always view other opinions with an open mind. Filter, take, and use whatever is useful to you, throw away the rest.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

The forum software currently in use does not allow for up and down voting like, say HackerNews and Slashdot of old forums did/do. I've always found that useful it allows the readers to mod.

 

[CornbreadFed]

If these inexperienced djs are so bad, why can’t you call them out and debunk their topics instead of crying insults/trolling their topics and trying to appeal to authority to get your way? This is a classic example of I can’t get my way and I need someone stronger to do it for me.

 

[ManFromTartarus]

If these inexperienced djs are so bad, why can’t you call them out and debunk their topics instead of crying insults/trolling their topics and trying to appeal to authority to get your way? This is a classic example of I can’t get my way and I need someone stronger to do it for me.

Because I don't want to waste my time going back & forth or (reading others) in a pissing match over opposing views, it takes away from the actual learning process, and leads to a lot of negativity around here. I'm involved with a couple other forums (on different subject matter) that ban troll behavior and the positivity and learning benefits are on a complete other level compared to what I see going on here at this time.

I can safely say that I've learned *BY FAR* more from the older posts on the SS website and not the forum itself, and when I see the level of trolling going on at this time here I question if being here is worth my time. (Hence my post count)

You can be mad all you want from what people say, but the wiser thing is to learn from what's going on around you.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

I've been a forum moderator in past lives; it is hard, time-consuming, and uncompensated work. You cannot please all of the people all of the time. You also come across people who are pathetic little shytes that spend inordinate amounts of time writing WALLS of text that you as a mod need to mow through.

Hell, even in a subject I'm interested in if your reply is more than a few paragraphs I TLDR; you.

As a mod you are subject to the terms of service and have to enforce them; you did not write them; you are here to help keep the place in order.

The site owner pays for the forum hosting and bandwidth and last time I checked, there is no fee for this site. Be glad they provide this spot for you, but don't go about trying to tear down the place because you got butthurt. Ask how you can help improve the site and volunteer.

The above is not directed at anyone in specific.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Because I don't want to waste my time going back & forth or (reading others) in a pissing match over opposing views, it takes away from the actual learning process, and leads to a lot of negativity around here. I'm involved with a couple other forums (on different subject matter) that ban troll behavior and the positivity and learning benefits are on a complete other level compared to what I see going on here at this time.

I can safely say that I've learned *BY FAR* more from the older posts on the SS website and not the forum itself, and when I see the level of trolling going on at this time here I question if being here is worth my time. (Hence my post count)

You can be mad all you want from what people say, but the wiser thing is to learn from what's going on around you.

Then why not just use the ignore feature instead of putting barriers up to free speech? There’s a difference between disagreeing with posters you don’t align with and having a meaningful discussion with or ignoring and posters that just troll and derail topics because they are huge cry babies like a certain poster that inspired this topic.

 

[ManFromTartarus]

Hell, even in a subject I'm interested in if your reply is more than a few paragraphs I TLDR; you.
.....................

but don't go about trying to tear down the place because you got butthurt. Ask how you can help improve the site

100% on that statement, some have diarrhea of the fingers, and time is so valuable.

.. but I don't think my idea is tearing down, more asking what would improve.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

"Free Speech" is only viable in public spaces; this is not a public space it is paid for and owned by someone. No shirt, no shoes, no service.

I REPEAT, FREE SPEECH DOES NOT APPLY ON PRIVATE PROPERTY.

 

[ManFromTartarus]

Then why not just use the ignore feature instead of putting barriers up to free speech?

I try not to hide behind that shield, just trying to explore any avenues to improve our experience here. If I'm wrong the thread & poll will reflect that.

 

[The Duke]

If you cant handle the stuff that gets posted here, you wont be able to handle women either. Best to improve your skills.

 

[johnrambo]

Just one example. There are many more. Last thing you wanna create is an echo chamber where only "true manly RP proven men" can post. Because everyone has his own path to becoming a DJ. Some need more time, content, and life lessons before they get it.

Most men look for the red pill only after a heart break. We all have those relationships where it was hard to let go.

 

[HaleyBaron]

In consensus, let it be. I want everyone to come here and ask stuff. That way, when it seems ignorant, we can at least comment on it. They can choose to listen or to vehemently oppose like cornbread does.

What we do need is when users constantly spam thread creations without learning from what people told them in previous threads. Some of us remember the user who kept spamming threads about his porn situation of being in a house ****ing a mom and her two daughters. At that point, mods would be best to intervene. On some forums, they have thread creation cooldowns, forcing users to be deliberate of their advice and discussion seeking.

 

[CornbreadFed]

In consensus, let it be. I want everyone to come here and ask stuff. That way, when it seems ignorant, we can at least comment on it. They can choose to listen or to vehemently oppose like cornbread does.

What we do need is when users constantly spam thread creations without learning from what people told them in previous threads. Some of us remember the user who kept spamming threads about his porn situation of being in a house ****ing a mom and her two daughters. At that point, mods would be best to intervene. On some forums, they have thread creation cooldowns, forcing users to be deliberate of their advice and discussion seeking.

and also keep posters from emotionally trolling other topics and posters due to simply disagreeing with them

 

[Serenity]

I doubt they would have the time for it

You're right. We wouldn't have the time for that, certainly not with the activity level of this forum.

You seem to think things would change for the better with this approach, but given the same forum rules you'll see 99% of the same posts you don't like. It would only be worse because NOTHING would happen on this forum unless a mod is online and actually we aren't at all times, we do have lives to live.

This is a forum where pretty much any opinion is allowed and only a couple of general topics are not allowed to discuss (politics and religion). It's only natural that there will be strong disagreements, that one side will think the other is a complete moron and shouldn't be allowed to post. Well, the admin and the mods value free speech, this is just a consequence of this freedom. It's a far lesser evil than restricting opinions which would just simply kill the forum in the long term because the mods would be viewed as tyrants if we did decide such matters.

The best way to mitigate trolling and bickering is through the reporting system. We rarely respond to a report, but every single one is viewed by at least one mod. We as mods don't read every single thread and post all the time, as I said, we have lives. If everyone knew the rules well and reported stuff they thought violated the rules, then you'd contribute to raising the quality of this forum. I know stuff slips through the cracks here, the violation is there, no mod happens to read it and nobody else bothers to report it, so it stays like it's ok even if it isn't.

Trolls are everywhere until you have the responsibility of making sure a troll really is a troll and not some incredibly clueless dude legitimately in need of help, this isn't as easy as it might seem. Some guys really just are that naive, even if you aren't. Some guys are also just trolls, but they'll become obvious to us mods sooner rather than later anyways.

I totally see the problems you're mentioning, but I don't agree with your solution. As it stands we don't receive as many reports as we probably should, so I suggest reminding yourselves to report whenever you see trolls and bickering. We usually do get around to it rather quickly.

 

[BadBoy89]

Because I don't want to waste my time going back & forth or (reading others) in a pissing match over opposing views, it takes away from the actual learning process, and leads to a lot of negativity around here. I'm involved with a couple other forums (on different subject matter) that ban troll behavior and the positivity and learning benefits are on a complete other level compared to what I see going on here at this time.

You are saying “I don’t like the thread, and I don’t want to waste my time going back and forth arguing about it.”

No one is forcing you to read the thread. If you don’t like it, don’t read it.

when I see the level of trolling going on at this time here I question if being here is worth my time. (Hence my post count)

What you consider a troll may be helpful to a man hurting from heartbreak. You can’t define what a troll is.

 

[ManFromTartarus]

You seem to think things would change for the better with this approach, but given the same forum rules you'll see 99% of the same posts you don't like.

...............

Some guys really just are that naive, even if you aren't. Some guys are also just trolls, but they'll become obvious to us mods sooner rather than later anyways.


..................


I totally see the problems you're mentioning, but I don't agree with your solution. As it stands we don't receive as many reports as we probably should, so I suggest reminding yourselves to report whenever you see trolls and bickering. We usually do get around to it rather quickly.

I appreciate you chiming in and *ALL THE REPLIES* from members whether we agree or not, or if I've put you in check over your statements here on other subjects.

The key in my eyes is your first point I quote, "you think things would be better", which is exactly that, just a thought and opinion. Most of the bickering back & forth I see is coming from members triggered by threads that are too literalistic in nature stating "this is how it is" or "this is the truth" when it's simply a viewpoint, and sometimes not based on a wide field of experience.

I don't and never proclaimed to have the "solution", simply an idea and viewpoint which the poll reflects is not the answer for this forum.

 

[ManFromTartarus]

You are saying “I don’t like the thread, and I don’t want to waste my time going back and forth arguing about it.”

No one is forcing you to read the thread. If you don’t like it, don’t read it.



What you consider a troll may be helpful to a man hurting from heartbreak. You can’t define what a troll is.

I understand your points but many times you have to waste time reading them before you realize how invalid some threads and posts can be, and time is precious. My idea came from other forums that have less drama and are very efficient at sharing & conveying knowledge.

.... and yes I've seen a lot of naive broken hearted members here in need of some tough love, some so bizarre that I have a hard time determining if they're trolling. I should have left that term out of my equation as it's the bickering that I find the most unproductive.