Ideas of where to meet women

[corrector]

U r focusing on the looks.

Focus on what those little girls did to their mindset and how that helped them as they grew into adults.

Don't you think that's a circular argument?

 

[sangheilios]

You are white, and you were an outsider in a white town?



I moved from two different schools. I was weird with some women who were attracted to me (i.e. I didn't reciprocate back to them properly or pursued them) and had insane infatuations to women who absolutely wanted to have nothing to do with me. Do you think you may have unintentionally ignored the woman that you may have had a chance with and was just eying the wrong women?

It would take me a really long time to tell that story in depth, and I'm honestly not going to bother as it really isn't all that relevant to this thread.

 

[sangheilios]

I don't care about any pity stories you might have or didn't have.

Right now you should only care about getting results, so let's focus on the future. Let the past remain in the past.

Dress and groom up to the max, take a picture and let us see if there's any improvements to be made.

Once that's taken care of we'll work on the 80%.

I've already posted pictures on here before, there are no issues with that.

 

[Spaz]

Don't you think that's a circular argument?

Merely facts unless you wish to view it as circular.

 

[Spaz]

I've already posted pictures on here before, there are no issues with that.

Seems like u r more keen to go blogging in SS about ur dismal performances rather then give us an updated picture for us to evaluate further.

If that's the case then carry on.

 

[corrector]

Merely facts unless you wish to view it as circular.

The boys were good looking and popular, which is why they got attention from little girls in the first place. They didn't just get right attention from little girls in space.

If you look at the OP, and even myself for that matter, we were rejected or bullied in the elementary school and weren't in the popular good-looking guys club.

 

[Spaz]

The boys were good looking and popular, which is why they got attention from little girls in the first place. They didn't just get right attention from little girls in space.

If you look at the OP, and even myself for that matter, we were rejected or bullied in the elementary school and weren't in the popular good-looking guys club.

Go back and read my original post, then instead of using that tunnel vision u r so used too, open a little wider that vision and if u r lucky you might be able to see a little better and understand why I wrote that particular piece.

 

[AttackFormation]

I'm 6'4", in really good shape, an attractive and educated good guy and I can't land a date with any of them out here without tons of drama, time wasting, etc.

I've already posted pictures of myself on here, I'm 6'4", I'm naturally broad shouldered and have a fit/athletic body. I'm told I'm a nice looking guy, on here as well as in real life. That isn't the issue, and if it was there really isn't much else I could change.

You keep repeating this over and over and over and over and over and over in your threads. Look dude, we know - and we didn't even need to know, nor is anyone asking. But the fact that you feel a need to repeat this constantly comes across as either socially oblivious or narcissistic. If it's the former then I think you should definitely keep going back to working out your social issues like you just talked about from your adolesence rather than focusing on locations (especially as there aren't any magic locations anyway for cold approaches).

 

[sangheilios]

Seems like u r more keen to go blogging in SS about ur dismal performances rather then give us an updated picture for us to evaluate further.

If that's the case then carry on.

Huh? I've already posted a picture of myself on here lol, you act as if I was 400 pounds, wear sweat pants, don't shower lol.

Makes no sense

 

[sangheilios]

You keep repeating this over and over and over and over and over and over in your threads. Look dude, we know - and we didn't even need to know, nor is anyone asking. But the fact that you feel a need to repeat this constantly comes across as either socially oblivious or narcissistic. If it's the former then I think you should definitely keep going back to working out your social issues like you just talked about from your adolesence rather than focusing on locations (especially as there aren't any magic locations anyway for cold approaches).

Huh, it's a response to a poster who was asking for me to post pictures of myself, as if that is somehow the reason why I have a hard time with dating. I say all that, one because I'm not sitting there in front of you, and two because it's relevant to what was being discussed. The whole point is that is not the issue, and if it is then those women are ridiculously picky.

 

[AttackFormation]

Huh, it's a response to a poster who was asking for me to post pictures of myself, as if that is somehow the reason why I have a hard time with dating. I say all that, one because I'm not sitting there in front of you, and two because it's relevant to what was being discussed. The whole point is that is not the issue, and if it is then those women are ridiculously picky.

I've got that guy on ignore then, but you still bring it up elsewhere so you can't deflect it entirely. Whatever dude.

 

[pipeman84]

Just last week, I cold approached a cute girl on the subway. She was into it. I could tell she was attracted to me. I made her just the right amount and kind of nervous. We rode the same train and sat next to each other and talked 20 mins. Got into some great topics that were deeper than "where do you work" etc. Shared some things about myself. We had a ton in common, in terms of work, dogs, and hobbies. Nearing her stop, I suggested we connect so I asked for her FB. She instantly said yes and took my phone and searched herself then requested the add. Later that day, she DM'd me (I had not reached out yet) and she said that it was really nice meeting me, that she loved our convo, thanked me for approaching her, and said it made her morning, with a big smiley face. Later I responded it was good to meet her, and I referenced something from our convo that I was impressed by and that I'd love to learn more, and we should get together. I gave her an activity, a date, and a time I was free. She read the message and never replied!

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a tiny bit frustrating, especially because I would give my game and our interaction that day an A+, coupled with her reaching out to initiate further contact. But this is just how 95% of women are. It's not the location. They are like this everywhere. You just have to roll your eyes and keep approaching. Most won't stick but some will. The ones that do make the effort worth it.

The bolded part is one way of looking at it. The other way, which is much more probable is that you didn't read the room correctly ... she made conversation with you because she was polite and a captive audience. Giving you her FB upon your request was the logical conclusion of that....what else was she supposed to do, after 20min of polite conversation, tell you to your face that she's not interested? that would've been weird. Then, when she no longer was a captive audience, she had 3 choices: 1. ghost you right away 2. send a polite message then ghost 3. tell you what was really on her mind and then ghost. She went for the second one, which is congruent with her behavior during the subway interaction.

 

[SW15]

It is good to see this thread revived. @sangheilios, the OP, is still an active participant on this forum and is still facing similar issues to the ones he raised on this thread in 2019.

I've already posted pictures of myself on here, I'm 6'4", I'm naturally broad shouldered and have a fit/athletic body. I'm told I'm a nice looking guy, on here as well as in real life.

At 6'4" and fit/athletic, that's some serious top tier potential there. That's the foundation of what certain guys like to call a "Chad".

When I was in the 8th grade we had moved to this white trash town and literally no one would talk to me, even on just a friendly level. I dealt with years of abuse through high school, none of the girls would flirt with me at all because I was this outsider. Every single new kid that had moved there dealt with the same issues I did, the difference was their parents pulled them out of there within a year. Even after I had graduated high school I heard tons of stories about the same things. Anyway, that stunted me socially to a horrible degree, including with developing "game". I do have friends now but I'm still very awkward with women and it doesn't come across as natural.

This is relevant. Childhood relocations are very damaging to children and often have lifelong social repercussions, including repercussions in development within mating and attracting women.

You mention the parents that pulled kids out of a bad school within a year. Those kids were likely also socially stunted after leaving that school due to multiple relocations. You were not the only one.

Children who experience one poor relocation experience or multiple childhood relocations often develop social issues, which are related to mating issues. Childhood bullying from other males will affect self-esteem and self-perception. This starts their off at a disadvantage dating in their teenage years. Poor dating experiences as a teenager can carry over later into one's adulthood.

Additionally, with childhood relocations, you don't stay in one area long enough to develop a social circle, which makes it more difficult to find dates, both in high school and in adulthood. The guys who play the social circle game best are the ones who rarely relocate. The guys who are able to live in the same area K-12 (and were not oddball social outcasts) and stay in that area as adults usually have no problems with getting relationships, usually in the form of longer term girlfriends because of the strength of their local social circle. The biggest problem for these type of guys is failed marriages down the road because these are generally blue pill men who only have gotten women based on their social circle and maybe having a good job. If these men have their social circles dry up, then they are in a world of hurt.

Guys without social circles become dependent upon app swiping, social media DMing, and approaching strangers, which are all more challenging paths in finding one girlfriend.

If you come off awkward with women, that's likely a disappointment for them. They are expecting a 6'4" stud to bang them. When women imagine a 6'0"+ guy with big muscles, they are not imagining someone who gives an awkward impression. With that said, being 6'0"+ and muscular reduces the amount of social skills a man needs in order to pound some vag.

Change your location to fish in a bigger pond, but don't think you aren't catching fish because your current pond is empty, or that the fish will behave better in the other pond.

The pond where @sangheilios was in 2019 and is still today is large enough. Men who live in metro areas with less than 150,000 can make the claim that their home city is too small. The city where @sangheilios lives is above the 150,000 population threshold, so it meets the minimum criteria. I'm not saying that this city is a good dating environment, but that's it is at least minimally acceptable.

Relocations rarely solve dating problems. The only times where a relocation can solve a dating problem is if someone moves from a sub-150,000 population to a larger point. Moving from one 150,000+ population pond to another 150,000+ population pond rarely solves the issue.

Until you are approaching 25+ girls a week, consistently, you just need to keep hammering through it.

That's the problem with approaching strangers vs. building a viable social circle when considering the short to medium term. Most men aren't doing 25+ approaches a week for multiple weeks at a time. Additionally, that volume of approaches without getting results will often psychologically damage a man. Imagine doing 25 approaches a week for 6 weeks and only getting 2, "one date, no sex, no second date" type interactions out of it. That would be bad.

It takes massive volume in approaching strangers, app swiping, and social media DMing to see meaningful results, which is why larger population pools are needed in the absence of a social circle.

Gym is just far too limited of an environment to rely upon, though it is an option to keep open.

Any 6'0"+ man with fit/athletic body is well positioned to have success in approaching at the gym or fitness classes from the gym.

 

[RangerMIke]

Where to meet women? Everywhere. Just try and go though life without seeing women.

 

[SW15]

Where to meet women? Everywhere. Just try and go though life without seeing women.

A lot of men struggle with that question. A lot of women are getting more closed off to getting approached by strangers due to smartphones and earbuds. Earbuds have made outdoor approaching and general gym floor approaching more difficult. @sangheilios is better positioned than most men to meet women on the general gym floor due to being 6'4" and being fit/athletic. Being 6'4" and super fit enables him to get past the earbud thing since women wearing earbuds are excited to meet Chad-like guys. When a 5'8'-5'11" guy approaches a woman wearing earbuds on the general gym floor, it's less likely to go well.

Fitness classes are a more reliable way at a gym to meet women for most men because it solves the earbud problem. However, women at most fitness classes are somewhat anti-social before and after classes. A lot of this depends on the location (class at a big box type gym vs. dedicated fitness studio). The least sociable women are women who go to classes at gyms like 24 Hour, LA Fitness, etc. Women at classes at brands such as SoulCycle, Title Boxing, or a Crossfit box are more likely to be open to an approach, but even these women aren't particularly social.

I think basing efforts to meet women around in-person ways of doing it are better than using the swipe apps or sending DMs on Instagram/Twitter.

The grocery store, the mall, bookstores, and coffee shops are classic options for cold approaching.

Lots of men join co-ed sports leagues in order to try to get their penises wet. I've covered that topic before. It's a challenging path and most men end up disappointed in making the effort via co-ed sports leagues for the purposes of getting dates.

 

[sangheilios]

A lot of men struggle with that question. A lot of women are getting more closed off to getting approached by strangers due to smartphones and earbuds. Earbuds have made outdoor approaching and general gym floor approaching more difficult. @sangheilios is better positioned than most men to meet women on the general gym floor due to being 6'4" and being fit/athletic. Being 6'4" and super fit enables him to get past the earbud thing since women wearing earbuds are excited to meet Chad-like guys. When a 5'8'-5'11" guy approaches a woman wearing earbuds on the general gym floor, it's less likely to go well.

Fitness classes are a more reliable way at a gym to meet women for most men because it solves the earbud problem. However, women at most fitness classes are somewhat anti-social before and after classes. A lot of this depends on the location (class at a big box type gym vs. dedicated fitness studio). The least sociable women are women who go to classes at gyms like 24 Hour, LA Fitness, etc. Women at classes at brands such as SoulCycle, Title Boxing, or a Crossfit box are more likely to be open to an approach, but even these women aren't particularly social.

I think basing efforts to meet women around in-person ways of doing it are better than using the swipe apps or sending DMs on Instagram/Twitter.

The grocery store, the mall, bookstores, and coffee shops are classic options for cold approaching.

Lots of men join co-ed sports leagues in order to try to get their penises wet. I've covered that topic before. It's a challenging path and most men end up disappointed in making the effort via co-ed sports leagues for the purposes of getting dates.

It's interesting to read this pre pandemic thread I made a while back.

I'd honestly say that the pandemic had quite a few negative impacts on the overall social atmosphere that have just not quite recovered. I believe that now more than ever young adults are more glued to their phones and are overall less social, especially with total strangers. I feel that this was already an issue for younger millennials and gen zs that was made worse by the lockdowns. It's not a great time for well meaning young men to meet women, rather unfortunate but it's just the reality of things.

 

[MatureDJ]

When I was in the 8th grade we had moved to this white trash town and literally no one would talk to me, even on just a friendly level. I dealt with years of abuse through high school, none of the girls would flirt with me at all because I was this outsider. Every single new kid that had moved there dealt with the same issues I did, the difference was their parents pulled them out of there within a year. Even after I had graduated high school I heard tons of stories about the same things. Anyway, that stunted me socially to a horrible degree, including with developing "game". I do have friends now but I'm still very awkward with women and it doesn't come across as natural.

I didn't ask out a girl until I was 19, it was embarrassingly awkward but what ended up happening was she made fun of me for it and gossiped about it with tons of people, who then continued to mock me for literally stumbling over myself and my words.

I've already posted pictures of myself on here, I'm 6'4", I'm naturally broad shouldered and have a fit/athletic body. I'm told I'm a nice looking guy, on here as well as in real life. That isn't the issue, and if it was there really isn't much else I could change.

Are you asking someone like me, who went to an all-boys middle & high school (like Kegger Kavanaugh) to have sympathy because you couldn't hit on chicks in your high school? And you have a Chad frame?

 

[AureliusMaximus]

. I had posted a thread almost 2 months ago about a speed dating event I had gone to, an interesting experience but filled with women I had absolutely no interest in.

I'm a regular gym goer and several times have tried approaching girls there and it resulted in nothing more than just wasting my time with attention seeking women. I'm not completely closed to approaching at the gym but I feel that it is fairly unrealistic for me to expect anything to come from that at this point.

I posted a thread a couple nights ago about an evening I had out at a local nightlife venue at my area and saw I actually was getting some attention from women, though as I had mentioned on there I'm getting myself reacquainted to that type of environment. Also, sometimes I'm just not really in the mood to go out on a given evening, and outside of Friday and Saturday evenings the nightlife is pretty much dead out here.

OLD has never really worked for me, I'd generally get no matches or messages back but with the ones I did it just turned into me messaging them to no avail. Also, OLD has been discussed on here relentlessly and it's pretty well accepted that it overall is just a waste of time.

I have and can do approaches in public, but this has netted me a fairly low success rate and it's not really something I can rely upon due to it being such a relatively uncommon occurrence.

I'm trying to come up with some ideas as to where I can possibly meet women. Right now I'm planning on going out on weekend nights on a more regular basis, even to just work on approaching women, but I need to be doing more than that.

Maybe you should ask yourself what does girls do when they are not working etc. and then maybe join in to activities like that?
Many times there isn't many guys there so the competition is low. its not a sprint game though, as you need to get to know people. I was once doing hip hop dance classes because I wanted to learn it and it was only me and about 25-30 girls and I pulled a few of them, but it took time because you cannot run around like a horny dog.

 

[SW15]

Are you asking someone like me, who went to an all-boys middle & high school (like Kegger Kavanaugh) to have sympathy because you couldn't hit on chicks in your high school? And you have a Chad frame?

Going to an all-boys high school is Game on hard mode.

There are 3 ways to have a decent high school mating experience at an all-boys school

1. Have a top tier physique and be a decent athlete
2. Have strong social ties in that region, particularly from the K-8 experience.
3. Your personal charisma must be amazing for the few school mixers with the all-girls schools.

If you don't have a top tier physique at high school age (8.5+ in looks compared to peer group), you'd better have #2. #2 happens from geographical constancy, school constancy (either the same K-8 public feeder pattern or the same K-8 private school) and have been semi popular during K-8 years. When that happens, you can socially network in with girls either at all-girls schools or at co-ed public schools.

@MatureDJ had neither of those 2 factors. For @MatureDJ , his lack of height would have made a co-ed high school bad too. I do think that an all-boys high school made his initial mating experience worse.

I have observed more long term negative effects in terms of mating from males who went to all-boys schools as compared to females who went to all-girls schools.

Kourtney and Kim Kardashian went to Marymount High School (all-girls) in Los Angeles. Both have gotten more penis than a urinal at McDonald's. I don't think going to Marymount affected their mating experiences.

 

[kavi]

At the end of the day, its upto men to create the social events and culture where they can meet women. Women DEFINITELY want to socialise with and meet men for dating. Women actually care more about relationships than men. Its not that women are not socialising or dont want to, its that in our current social and economic system there are no good ways for people to socialise.

So this is a basic problem that men need to solve. Then, the manoshphere is the best group to be able to solve this problem.

But its not easy to do this. Its true that it is currently very hard to meet and socialise with the opposite gender, hence men are attempting to talk to women out in non-social environments ie cold-approach which is often seen as a faux-pax by society.