why do women on the rebound come on so strong?

[derby1]

ill be honest i'm a bit pissed off these last 3 weeks, It seems an ever growing amount of women who are in sneaky LTR relationships that you would hardly tell.

What annoys me the most is how they basically love bomb you, send you paragraph messages, first to initiate. real feel good interactions. Only for them to vanish like you were the one coming on strong. when they make up with their chap

one even had the audacity to plot the future, and say stuff like "dont worry I wont scare you off". Then ironically she vanished on me, once she made up with her ex

Literally OTT HOT, to ICE Cold within a day...

All 3 are back in their LTRS, so i can presume its nothing i did. I've been here long enough.

Just a bit tedious at mo.

 

[derby1]

“Sneaky women” are never genuinely concerned with showing men respect or treating them well.

what i mean is there all in some kind of relationship, its becoming the norm

 

[derby1]

Please say more. I am not understanding what you mean.

my main question is why women come on so strong, when their on the rebound, then they have the audacity to vanish like youve been the needy one.
(obviously we know theyve rekindled their LTR)

 

[RickTheToad]

ill be honest i'm a bit pissed off these last 3 weeks, It seems an ever growing amount of women who are in sneaky LTR relationships that you would hardly tell.

What annoys me the most is how they basically love bomb you, send you paragraph messages, first to initiate. real feel good interactions. Only for them to vanish like you were the one coming on strong. when they make up with their chap

one even had the audacity to plot the future, and say stuff like "dont worry I wont scare you off". Then ironically she vanished on me, once she made up with her ex

Literally OTT HOT, to ICE Cold within a day...

All 3 are back in their LTRS, so i can presume its nothing i did. I've been here long enough.

Just a bit tedious at mo.

The need and want to feel desired. They feel empty inside.

 

[metalwater]

my main question is why women come on so strong, when their on the rebound, then they have the audacity to vanish like youve been the needy one.
(obviously we know theyve rekindled their LTR)

ever seen kids playing Mario, they get power-ups and then can progress. it is like that. and guys are so predictable when they do that it is no risk for them.

 

[Lookatu]

This can all go back to actions over words.

It seems like you might be giving their words way more value than you should be.

Hot-Cold-Hot isn't congruent with what they are telling you or expressing to you. All BS unless proven otherwise.

 

[derby1]

This can all go back to actions over words.

It seems like you might be giving their words way more value than you should be.

Im well aware of all this, what im asking is why they do it, because its god damn weird & tedious. it seems to be a common theme women on the rebound come on super strong, then they have the audacity to vanish

 

[Lookatu]

Im well aware of all this, what im asking is why they do it, because its god damn weird & tedious. it seems to be a common theme women on the rebound come on super strong, then they have the audacity to vanish

Because they are women. Learn to accept their nature and eventually not have it phase you. It's taken me over 2 years to get to that point. You will be eventually be immune to it once you accept it and are aware of it.

 

[derby1]

Validation. They want to feel desired as stated above. They vanish if they don't need you any more.

all this still doesnt explain why they would send paragraph messages of interest, meet up, give of girlfriend vibes.

They can get validation with a lot less effort

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Because they are women. Learn to accept their nature and eventually not have it phase you. It's taken me over 2 years to get to that point. You will be eventually be immune to it once you accept it and are aware of it.

Can your responses and or reactions be what "they need to see "?. I'm gonna guess when the wool is pulled from our eyes they notice us either non reactive or quick to anger. So they can tell.

 

[derby1]

I don’t understand why one would ever expect healthy relationship behavior, to come from a woman, who is actively cheating on another man?

theyve split recently was my point,

 

[Kotaix]

They're taking advantage of the fact that they're free to have sex in the days between when they break up with their guy and when they get back together. They come on strong because they want to have sex and don't have the time available to play coy.

 

[Lookatu]

An unhealthy woman may love bomb you, to see if you will up your intensity of affection for her. She doesn’t just want validation from men. She will often crave intensity too. She will want to feeeeeel that she is intensely desired.

Along similar lines, I found this statement that Gemma said from Son's of Anarchy series to resonate with me.

 

[KindredSpiritzz]

womem cant stand to be alone, even for a day. They have to always have one hand on a branch some place as they are swinging thru the trees. You're like the "in case of emergency break glass" guy to them. You'll do in a pinch when their emotions are running wild but they are looking for something better the whole time.

 

[Bigpapa]

@derby1 i feel you , but maybe this means that you should talk less with them over the phone , and escalate things in person

I think that you just thought that you have her because she is giving you a lot of attention , and did not escalate things . Or not as fast as you could have

always mold the iron when is hot

 

[derby1]

I think that you just thought that you have her because she is giving you a lot of attention , and did not escalate things . Or not as fast as you could have

I couldnt have done anymore, I met them twice within a week. I find their intensity interesting that's all. then they have the audacity to do a 180

You'll do in a pinch when their emotions are running wild but they are looking for something better the whole time.

I consider myself twice the male of their current partners, however they have the emotional investment, I didnt.

 

[Juanto]

If they come on really strong, just call their bluff and arrange a meetup ASAP. If they refuse or act coy, you know they are playing games.

 

[Bigpapa]

I couldnt have done anymore, I met them twice within a week. I find their intensity interesting that's all. then they have the audacity to do a 180



I consider myself twice the male of their current partners, however they have the emotional investment, I didnt.

if Things were so intense , did you try to escalate to sex ?

you should have jumped on them in the car , in the park , in a filthy gang next to a hobo that is taking a sh1t

them being intense is a green light to push hard for sex , nothing more

even though they were just testing the waters , it is also your fault for not having logistics and a proper objective when meeting them

 

[derby1]

even though they were just testing the waters , it is also your fault for not having logistics and a proper objective when meeting them

each time i tried i was met with **** blocking excuses, we made out and both women gave me hand jobs however didnt stay longer than an hour.....

this leads me to believe the women involved all had partners still sniffing round/or in their houses (well ofcourse they did because all 3 are back with their chaps lol)

 

[Modern Man Advice]

ill be honest i'm a bit pissed off these last 3 weeks, It seems an ever growing amount of women who are in sneaky LTR relationships that you would hardly tell.

What annoys me the most is how they basically love bomb you, send you paragraph messages, first to initiate. real feel good interactions. Only for them to vanish like you were the one coming on strong. when they make up with their chap

one even had the audacity to plot the future, and say stuff like "dont worry I wont scare you off". Then ironically she vanished on me, once she made up with her ex

Literally OTT HOT, to ICE Cold within a day...

All 3 are back in their LTRS, so i can presume its nothing i did. I've been here long enough.

Just a bit tedious at mo.

Let's get the important part off the way first. You are reacting too strongly about this. Don't let your emotions take over you, keep them in check.

Secondly, not sure how experienced you are with women but this is really common. It happens to the best of us. It's not a reflection of you, so do not take it personally. Women for so many reasons, but the main and most common one is attention. They simply want attention, stand your ground, and do not easily give your attention away.

Lastly, going back to our first point. Women are not attracted who do not control emotions and have them in check. They might say the opposite but the reality is they do not respect a man who can easily be triggered. And this is triggering you.

Hope this helps.

Best,
Modern Man Advice