Young Girl, Office Gossip ....

[mr-moxie]

Ok I asked a girl out in work last week for dinner (bit formal I know should have said drink but there we are) ... I am 28 she is 21 .... FIRSTLY is that too age gap too big?

... I over heard the word pedophile mentioned between a conversation between her (the girl I asked out) and a jolly ex police officer who also works in the office ... she replyed "thats the second person that has said that ... thats a nasty word I dont like that word" .....

... it is now blatently all around the office now as she is telling people including an older collegue ...

... I am absolutly not bothered about the fact that I asked her out or the fact its around the office ...

... I am bothered that I didnt notice the age gap or saw it as an issue?!!??!

I am taking the fact that she told people as good sign, as she is using me asking her out as a way to demonstrate higher value with her collgues ... does this behavour make sence?

Anyway, my plan is just to ignore the issue until it blows over and becomes old news, continue to be ****y and funny with the other girls and guys and continue to ask other girls out in my social circles....

Bit of a brain dump, not a big issue in my life but comments greatfully recieved ....

 

[DJDamage]

That's why you don't ask a girl at work. You don't need gossip or other problems at work that may arise from your pending relationship especially when the ship sinks.

She is 21 and you are 28 there is nothing wrong with that age gap.

I am taking the fact that she told people as good sign, as she is using me asking her out as a way to demonstrate higher value with her collgues ... does this behavour make sence?

Your reading too much into it. Women love to gossip they treat it like a sport. I noticed when one woman gossips to another, that woman become's her second pair of eyes when she is not around. She will tell as many people as possible making them her watchful guardians and tell her everything you did. Gossiping is like big brother watching you.

 

[MacAvoy]

Everyone else is just jealous. 7 years among adults is nothing. If she was 18, it might be another story.

At least at 28 you can pick up 21 year olds. That is a good thing. Don't let other people knock you off your moxie

 

[Vulpine]

... I am absolutly ...
higher value with her collgues ... does this behavour make sence?

Her making fun of you to the other people in the office makes a lot of sence.


Well, it does to me, but I have a pretty obscure sence of humor.

 

[mr-moxie]

Just to explain I am moving sections next week although admitidly not offices.... I am in no way bothered about the office gossip ... if anything it adds to my street cred in the office ... I work in IT ... all the guys are AFC ... there is one ex army bloke in the office and he projects an image of 'a bit of a boy' ... i want to project that image ... I am projecting that image ... she knows of atleast two other women I have dated over the six months .... the other guys in the office are single and have been for some time ...

 

[Latinoman]

Just to explain I am moving sections next week although admitidly not offices.... I am in no way bothered about the office gossip ... if anything it adds to my street cred in the office ... I work in IT ... all the guys are AFC ... there is one ex army bloke in the office and he projects an image of 'a bit of a boy' ... i want to project that image ... I am projecting that image ... she knows of atleast two other women I have dated over the six months .... the other guys in the office are single and have been for some time ...

Dude...LOL...PRETENDING to be cool at the expense of being called a pedophile?

Don't do things at the Office to impress women. Do things at the Office to advance your career and make LOT of $$$$.

If you want to get laid...that's your problem. But certainly something that should be kept private.

By the way...I'm 38. I wouldn't have a problem dating a woman that is 26. 28 and 21 is more than appropriate...IMO. As long as she knows how to keep her mouth shut.

One more point...WORK =/ SOCIAL CIRCLE.

 

[Latinoman]

Everyone else is just jealous. 7 years among adults is nothing. If she was 18, it might be another story.

At least at 28 you can pick up 21 year olds. That is a good thing. Don't let other people knock you off your moxie

I agree.

 

[mr-moxie]

Dude...LOL...PRETENDING to be cool at the expense of being called a pedophile?

Don't do things at the Office to impress women. Do things at the Office to advance your career and make LOT of $$$$.

If you want to get laid...that's your problem. But certainly something that should be kept private.

By the way...I'm 38. I wouldn't have a problem dating a woman that is 26. 28 and 21 is more than appropriate...IMO. As long as she knows how to keep her mouth shut.

One more point...WORK =/ SOCIAL CIRCLE.

Esh! How come there is no KARMA settings on this Bulitin like the London Seduction Society! ... anyway .... Feedback appriaciated if constructive!

I was attracted to her, I asked her out ... I MAKE NO APPOLOGY for that to her or anyone ...

I have never tried to IMPRESS anyone ... that has never been my way ... infact my boss does that and he hasnt been laid in years, he is 29.

... I have never prentended to be COOL... I date women she knows that ... I am not some wet AFC embarested by the fact that I am a man ...

Moxie

 

[joekerr31]

nothing wrong with the age gap, although it is HIGHLY advisable NOT to ask out chics under 24/25 in the office.

they are green behind the ears and still aren't anywhere near mature enough to handle such an occurance appropriately.

once they are over 25 or so, and assuming they exhibit a fair amount of maturity, you can bang them on the photocopier machine on the weekend and they won't go around telling anyone.

younger women are find to get laid and fool around with - but pick them up outside of work. that way when they pull some immature bull**** like telling people sh*t about you, it doesnt impact your livelihood and its generally to people you could care less about anyway.

and in the office i STRONGLY STRONGLY STRONGLY suggest you never ask a woman out directly.

you can easily ask a girl out WITHOUT asking her out. you can have a conversation with her and then act like you have to rush off and say 'want to continue this over coffee sometime?"

if she's into you she will jump at hte opportunity. keep upping the social contact and changing the environments you have it in, and eventually she will start dropping major hints that she wants you to officially ask her out.

the work place is not hte place to be mackin unless you are a C-level executive and people fear you. even then they will talk about you behidn the scenes, but you'll never have to worry about becuase they are too worried about your approval of them.

 

[thissucks003]

Moxie,

You just have to neutralize the age gap before it really becomes an issue. Talk about how you dated other women her age or a year younger than her. That should neutralize other people's c0ckblocking. She must feel that or know that you are not embarassed at the age difference. It would put her at ease knowing that you have done this before.

TS

 

[mr-moxie]

Anyone have experience of handling the situation her on in?

Just to give a bit of background on the girl ... she is very good at gaming guys ... she has my boss wrapped around her little finger and several of the other guys in the office, I have teased her on this on the odd occasion just to indicate to her that I know her game and am on to it. She is also very good at kicking off and **** testing guys.

What should I do how should I act the way I see it I have two options ....

1) Behave as a was before ... ****y and Funny, the odd neg, keeping it light and fun ....
2) Behave Professional ... Only talk to her when I have a job related reason to do so ....

My instinct is to do 2 which means I should do 1.

Any other advice ???

 

[warpy]

Moxie,

You just have to neutralize the age gap before it really becomes an issue. Talk about how you dated other women her age or a year younger than her. That should neutralize other people's c0ckblocking. She must feel that or know that you are not embarassed at the age difference. It would put her at ease knowing that you have done this before.

TS

i dont think so, he should not qualify to her. she should say those things to him as if she wants to climb to his status. he should however try to tease her about it. maybe he should slap a wet one on her at the office, that will neutralize the whole situation of embarassement

 

[realsmoothie]

God, there is no age gap here. 28 and 21? No big deal.

 

[drZaius09]

They're not calling you a pedophile because you asked out a 21-year-old. She's been a legal adult for several years. Whatever.

They're calling you a pedophile because you are creepy. You creep everyone out-- the women, the men, everybody. They use such cruel language because they think you're a creep.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Dude, those old dudes, the older ex cop, and anybody else, would be all over that young piece of a$$ if they had a chance. As sexually frustrated older guys who want to jump her, off course they will be hatin on anybody with a chance.

 

[joekerr31]

there is a saying

'if there's grass on the field play ball'

:crackup:

BUT only play ball in the 18 and over league.

 

[Latinoman]

They're not calling you a pedophile because you asked out a 21-year-old. She's been a legal adult for several years. Whatever.

They're calling you a pedophile because you are creepy. You creep everyone out-- the women, the men, everybody. They use such cruel language because they think you're a creep.

LOL.

I agree.

 

[thissucks003]

i dont think so, he should not qualify to her. she should say those things to him as if she wants to climb to his status. he should however try to tease her about it. maybe he should slap a wet one on her at the office, that will neutralize the whole situation of embarassement

He is not qualifying himself to her. He is pacing her reality. Since other's brought up the age difference, he should diffuse the situation. There are many ways to skin a cat. My favorite is alive.