****y & funny = smartass?

[bb213]

So I was at this party the other night and I was intoduced to this hot girl that goes to my school. We were talking for a little while and I was working on the whole ****y/funny thing, but trying not to overdo it since I'm still trying to get it down. Anyway, at one point she said I was such a smartass. Well, she didn't seem like she was upset about that or anything, but I didn't get the impression she was turned on by it either. I didn't see her for the rest of the night so I don't know how she took it.

Here's the question: when does ****y & funny become just being a smartass? Is that a good thing? Is being a smartass the ultimate goal of that anyway? I have seen people use the ****y & funny approach and I know it works for them, but it is completely opposite of how I am. I tend to come over as just being mean or not funny with that approach.

Any advice from those of you who have learned how to do this (when it didn't come as second nature)?

 

[Player_Supreme]

There is a big difference between a lowly smart ass and doing a well elevated game of c&f.

If you don't know the difference you should tread lightly until you do.

I have a nerdy friend who tries to do c&f but because he is so smart and disconnected from the real world it comes off as being wierd and smart assed.

You may want to watch for examples when your around others. Look for the ****y kinda guy and try to listen in on his conversations to learn the difference.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

As not to send you out searching for something you wouldn't recognize if you found it, I will actually tell you the difference between ****y/funny and being a smartass. The difference is that one will draw people closer to you while the other will just piss people off.

Consider substituting the word 'confident' for the word '****y.' Being confident and funny should not poke mean fun at anyone but when done well should draw people nearer to you. Confidence is something that is conveyed most effectively with ones actions and not by what he says, talk is cheap.

Being funny works best when it makes the other person feel good, simple as that. Being a smartass does neither.

 

[Starman]

smartass is not good if she said it in a condescending way..if she was laughing or teasing when she said it ..its a good thing

What exactly did you say that made her call you a smartass? c/f can sometimes come out being rude and insulting..which like the guys said can push people away from you rather than towards you

It also depends on the girl..some are ultrasensitive and interpret c/f as insults..then they get defensive..most of these girls have no sense of humor and are too damn serious to DJ anyway

the last thing you want is to walk on eggshells with a sensitive chick..because of fear of insulting her

 

[bb213]

****y + funny

Actually, I don't remember exactly what it was I was saying to her. She rolled her eyes and laughed when she said that. After she said I was a smartass, I said Hey, it's better than being a dumbass...

My question, when I think about it, really is can you really learn to be ****y & funny if you just don't have a ****y sense of humor? I can't imagine Woody Allen being -****y- and funny (no comment about his personal life). Sense of humor seems to be something you're born with. Or does it just take practice to get up to the level where you can be ****y and funny without girls perceiving you are making fun of them (to their face)?

 

[Starman]

dude,

you are totally confusing c/f with being insulting..when you said that "dumbass" remark..you insulted HER..you called her a DUMBASS

now step back..if a girl called u a dumbass, would you consider her playful , funny, ****y in a attractive way?

here is a simple test to see if you are humourous by nature..or if you have to work to develop it..

when you go out to see comedy movies..or see something funny in real life..do you laugh? or do you follow the lead of others laughing?

when others are telling a joke..do you compare your laughing/amused level to others around you?

YES, being ****y and funny can be learned .. but you have to begin to really FEEL ****y and FUNNY

today I was driving..and saw 2 mexicans on a bike..one was sitting on the seat..the other was sitting on the frame of the bike getting a "ride"..he looked like a little midget/puppet sitting on the bike...that made me LOL

you need to find out what your view is on the world first..are you more serious and stiff? or do you have a hilarious side that is just dying to come out?

because typically, those who are serious, angry, frustrated underneath..and try to portray a ****y/funny attitude wind out coming off as insulting

 

[simplyme]

I cannot see, why this thread exists.There is absolutely no problem at all. If you are making her sincerely smile and laugh, keep it up the same way. What she says, doesn´t matter, as long as she is having fun.

 

[bb213]

****y & frustrated

So I've seen people do the ****y & funny thing, but it seems to me that it has more to do with confidence than the ****y & funny thing. The things I've heard are more insulting than I am, yet they work. I think my problem is that I am extremely frustrated.

Is there any example of ****y & funny (that would work in real life) in the movies?

Yes, I do have a sense of humor, but I'm not even in the slightest bit ****y. Me trying to be ****y comes across as this totally fake and completely rediculous act that people see straight through. It just isn't me. How about just funny?

 

[King Rat]

I would have to say your attitude has a LOT to do with it. When I was first trying C+F out, I would make remarks I kind of thought were funny, but I made 2 mistakes. One was I was just trying to do it "to get a date" or whatever-not natural. Also, I wasn't very confident (understatement ) and didn't know that my expression was totally deadpan most of the time, which resulted in me looking like a complete d!ck when I tried to "neg-hit"on someone. The times I've used it successfully and when it came most naturally was when I DID NOT GIVE A SH*T and just concentrated on having fun.
One time recently when a girl acted shocked and said "I'm never talking to you again!" I just grinned and said "Your loss" and started walking away... she chased me down . Fun when its done right.

 

[The Business Man]

For those who still have no clue:

C&F accentuators