Would you LTR a single Mommy?

[myfriendblu]

Just curious. Would you LTR a single mom? My biggest question to you that do is, WHY?
1. Why deal with the bs of being second in line behind someone elses kid
2. dealing with the issues that come about if the ex is still in her life(which he usually is)
3. the fact that you might not get much private time, vacations and getaways are difficult

Wouldn't it be much easier to just find a girl without one?

 

[Matt ala Casanova]

I don't hold it against the girl. It's not like i'm marrying the girl. If I ever feel weird about it, I go.

M.A.C.

 

[Chewy Bagel]

Just curious. Would you LTR a single mom? My biggest question to you that do is, WHY?

Single mothers try harder IMO and realize that they are not in control. You are the shot caller typically in the relationship as they realize that they are damaged goods w/out many other prospects.


1. Why deal with the bs of being second in line behind someone elses kid.

It's not as bad as it sounds. The women fawn all over you the second the kids are put to bed. Also, you can hang w/ your girl while the kids play - she doesn't always habe to be doing something w/ the kids.

2. dealing with the issues that come about if the ex is still in her life(which he usually is)

Again, not too bad - just take it in stride.

3. the fact that you might not get much private time, vacations and getaways are difficult.

I'm a mellow person who doesn't enjoy going out very often, so being a homebody w/ my gf is fun for me. She doesn't expect much from me.

It really depends on weather or not the kids are brats, the girl is a head case, and if the ex is psycho. I got lucky in that only the ex is a psycho, but keeps his distance as he knows I carry a gun.



__________________________________


I've got the hook up for generic Accutane (Isotretinoin). Hit me up if interested.

Madbandit@gandabacha.com

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Chewy Bagel


I've got the hook up for generic Accutane (Isotretinoin). Hit me up if interested.

Madbandit@gandabacha.com

Hey, accutane is a VERY serious drug that should NEVER be taken without proper monitoring from a doctor. Your blood levels need to be closely monitored and you need a psychological and medical evaluation before even considering taking that drug. Im shocked you even posted that

 

[oreo_renegade]

hehehe, I believe....

Sexy Malibu\
my friend blu\
has a crush on you!\



For real man, lay off the poor girl. You've been bringing things up about her in like almost every thread. I think if we were on a playground Blu here would be the guy pulling Sexy's pigtails.



Just what I suspect.... *walks off humming "K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Sexy, and myfriendblu sitting in a tree..." or however that lil song goes. *

 

[myfriendblu]

Re: hehehe, I believe....

Originally posted by oreo_renegade
Blu here would be the guy pulling Sexy's pigtails.

She has pigtails? Mmmmmmm

 

[oreo_renegade]

Re: Re: hehehe, I believe....

Originally posted by myfriendblu
She has pigtails? Mmmmmmm

not only that, but there is a bush you can hide behind that way *points*


have fun you two

 

[Sexy_Malibu]

Re: Re: hehehe, I believe....

I only have pigtails when I'm wearing my naughty school girl costume.

As for myfriendblu "picking on me"... thanks oreo for "defending" me... but it really doesn't bother me. If myfriendblu really thought I was such an annoying attention ***** he wouldn't be bothering me and feeding me all this attention in the first place.

As for this thread, I don't take offense to it. There are a lot of reasons not to date (LTR or otherwise) a single mother or father... but there are also reasons why someone else might want to do it...

Basically, it depends on the two people... I don't think there is any universal answer. Even the guys who say they'd never do it, might meet a girl someday that they totally fall head over heals for and they'd be willing to deal with it for her. There are guys who it is a problem for and there are guys who it isn't a problem for.

Personally, any guy who won't date me just because I have a kid isn't worth dating in my opinion. Not that they're a bad person because of it, but you gotta accept me for me... and if you don't then I don't care about you and I don't have to waste my time thinking about you. I don't judge them for having their own opinions, I just don't let it affect my own self-worth. Just the same as if someone doesn't like my looks, they don't have to look at me.

I'd never be like "oh my god, I'm so crushed that so-and-so doesn't find me attractive/ smart/ interesting/ dateable/ ****able/ whatever..." because I know that there ARE guys out there who DO find me attractive/ smart/ interesting/ dateable/ ****able... And those are the guys whose opinions I care about. So far I haven't had any problems.

 

[marqZAL]

The problem with Single Mothers is that your never really number 1 and if you are shes ****ed up!!!!!

 

[Sexy_Malibu]

Originally posted by marqZAL
The problem with Single Mothers is that your never really number 1 and if you are shes ****ed up!!!!!

Yeah. A lot of guys feel that way. But I think there is something to be said about a guy who is mature enough and secure enough not to need to be number one. I mean, there are parents that have more than one kid... do you think they always have one kid they give all their attention and then #2 gets ****? No... even if they DO have a favorite, they never really give their kids a hugely unequal amount of love/attention/etc (unless they are totally ****ed up parents). So I think the same thing applies. As long as they give you your "required" amount of attention/ love/ sex/ whatever... if you have enough self-esteem to not take it personally, then you're okay. The same thing applies to married couples with children, just because it's not your kid doesn't mean you can't deal with it. A lot of times when someone is dating a single parent, they actually (gasp! ) care about that person's children too. I don't think there is anything wrong with it if you don't feel that way... but I wouldn't say there's anything wrong with a person if they DO... if anything I'd say that person is pretty mature.

 

[Don Ronny]

No problem here.

1. Single Moms need lovin too
2. They are usually (hopefully) not selfish
3. A great mother is attractive to me.
4. I love kids and they love me because I happen to be a Big Kid myself.

THese are just personal preferences, which are always subject to change. A good friend of mine swore he would never date a single mom. hehe..you´ll never guess who he married!

 

[Kwah]

Nowadays if you get them after high school your not going to be #1 regardless, so why worry about it?

 

[Dell SkyCat]

I never been involved with a single mother nor plan to anytime in my existence here on earth. Realisticly though, I can accept the possibility of being different sum years from now and I can not see the future. So I won't curse myself by saying " I'll never get in an LTR with a single mommy' and come to realize down the line that's exactly what I'm be doing. SO I really, really, really, HOPE that will not be the case.

 

[ZeeOwl]

Honestly, for a LTR, I prefer a single-mother. For a STR I don't think it matters so much. Base conditions must apply of course...
A) You gotta first qualify her. Make sure you find out why she's a single mother. i.e. that she's not a nut-case. But then that should be done for all potential partners. Childless women can also be single because they're nut-cases.
B) You gotta love kids. But that's obvious, isn't it?

Reasons why I prefer single mothers (in my experience):
A) They love kids. And since I have kids, that's a must.
B) They're more mature.
C) They're more flexible and accomodating.
D) They're more giving, sweet and affectionate.
E) They're less superficial and materialistic.
F) They're more stable.

All qualities essential for a successful LTR.

 

[ZeeOwl]

Originally posted by marqZAL
The problem with Single Mothers is that your never really number 1 and if you are shes ****ed up!!!!!

I beg to disagree. And I speak from experience. You are not #1 all the time, of course. But if you act like a Man around her and her kids, she will treat you like a king at every possible opportunity (unless she's messed up). Like when the kids are asleep, or off at grandma's house, or you two are away for the weekend, etc. But it takes some effort on your part to get this. You have to treat her well, be supportive. Be good to her kids. I think it's worth it, because it's not an much of an effort for me, it comes naturally. In fairness I have to mention that I've been married and have kids. So I can understand that this isn't for everyone.

Childless women will rarely treat you so good, unless you get really lucky and find a gem. At the risk of ruffling some feathers here, they are usually all about me, me, me. In their universe, you will always be #2. She is #1. Especially if she's young.

I'm generalizing here of course. Exceptions exist, but they're exceptional.

 

[Dell SkyCat]

Originally posted by ZeeOwl
Honestly, for a LTR, I prefer a single-mother. For a STR I don't think it matters so much. Base conditions must apply of course...
A) You gotta first qualify her. Make sure you find out why she's a single mother. i.e. that she's not a nut-case. But then that should be done for all potential partners. Childless women can also be single because they're nut-cases.
B) You gotta love kids. But that's obvious, isn't it?

Reasons why I prefer single mothers (in my experience):
A) They love kids. And since I have kids, that's a must.
B) They're more mature.
C) They're more flexible and accomodating.
D) They're more giving, sweet and affectionate.
E) They're less superficial and materialistic.
F) They're more stable.

All qualities essential for a successful LTR.

NOT ALL WOMEN...not wait... NOT ALL SINGLE MOTHERS...

A) They love kids. And since I have kids, that's a must.
B) They're more mature.
C) They're more flexible and accomodating.
D) They're more giving, sweet and affectionate.
E) They're less superficial and materialistic.
F) They're more stable

Just like SOME single women who don't have children DO have all these qualities. Generally I agree. When they do become this wonderful person it is after giving birth. And that's the reason for these qualities... from you're experience of course. Looking back at what I wrote, If I too became a single daddy, I'd definitely want a LTR with a single mommy because we will both understand what it will be like. And understand that being with someone who doesn't have a child of thier own will NOT love yours or hers as much as you. Even when you both have a child of you're own together, you can not see the one who isn't yours as the one who is.

 

[NMMWCR]

It used to be verboten for me but my little brother has found a real gem thanks to being more open minded than I.

 

[Shiftkey]

Only if I was a single dad.

 

[drixsa]

yea i gotta say im into the MILF thing

so NO LTR unless you wanna be Giovanni Casanova

ONS is the better way to go

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by ZeeOwl
Reasons why I prefer single mothers (in my experience):
A) They love kids. And since I have kids, that's a must.
B) They're more mature.
C) They're more flexible and accomodating.
D) They're more giving, sweet and affectionate.
E) They're less superficial and materialistic.
F) They're more stable.

Dude your nuts

A. They do? I know A LOT of single moms who wish they NEVER had that kid in the first place and would take it back if they could. I be willing to bet that most single moms under 25 feel that way

B. No way. If anything, there less mature. A mature person would've used birth control or waited to get married to have kids

C. LOL ridiculous. There WAY F'IN LESS FLEXIBLE. They can't go anywhere or do jack squat without a sitter. there whole f'in world revolves around there kid.

D. I have found single moms to be more giving..affectionate? its a toss up

E. Thats not by choice. They have a MUCH SMALLER pool of men to chose from so they HAVE to be less superficial. A single mom is NOT going to get the creme of the crop DJ's.

F. stable in what means? There WAY LESS stable financially and emotionally because of the kid.