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Women are so stupid..(**** test thread)

Manonamission

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Okay, so this chick that I've been seeing for 2 months tried to pull some bull**** last night, I didnt think I'd have to deal with any **** tests considering that I'm going back to school in a week, and I'm assuming she knows that I'm not getting involved in a LDR since she's 19 and I'm only 20.

Anyway, last weekend she told me she couldn't see me because she had some type of family business to attend to. My gut reaction was that she was distancing herself, but I decided not to do anything too drastic. I told her that I was actually in a ****ty mood and that it was fine since I didn't want her to see me in a bad mood, we agreed to meet a week later since I have work all week. (We were supposed to meet yesterday).

Yesterday while I'm at work she texts me and says "I can't make it. My dad won't let me go out." I then offered to come visit her, she texted back "He said I can't have any visitors."

That was it. After I got off work, I called her told her that she was being extremely disrespectful, and that she had made a committment to me, and by not keeping it it was one of the most disrespectful things she could have done. I told her I do not tolerate sh!t like this, and if she wants to see me she has 5 days to make it up to me before I leave for school. I then just hung up the phone.

She called back 4 times in the next 10 minutes, I finally picked up on the 4th one, where she told me "How do you think I feel? I'm stuck in this house all alone?" and the "How come you just hung up, you didn't let me explain myself, and you didn't give me the benefit of the doubt."

I told her I had to get my point across, and the only way to do that was to hang up, I then told her I was sorry about the ****ty situation she was in, however that's a terrible excuse and she could have talked to her parents sooner about seeing me. She agreed to see me tonight, I'm not getting my hopes up. (I'm making her drive to come see me, she lives 40 minutes away)

My gut instinct is that the whole story she used last night was bull****, and that she's trying to distance herself from me before school starts. (or she's ****ing another dude). Your thoughts and comments would be helpful, I also would like to know if I handled this situation correctly, considering this is one of the first girls I've had try to pull bull****.

Thanks Guys

Man on a Mission.
 

Lucas718

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Just a thought... maybe she was telling the truth. You're really assuming a lot and blowing up at her without any proof that she did anything wrong. If you had called her and she was out then ok, but she was home just like she said she'd be.
 

Manonamission

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Lucas718 said:
Just a thought... maybe she was telling the truth. You're really assuming a lot and blowing up at her without any proof that she did anything wrong. If you had called her and she was out then ok, but she was home just like she said she'd be.
Lucas,

That's besides the point. She knew about hanging out with me for a week. All she had to do was tell her parents about it, and I'm sure they'd be fine with it. It was the second time she cancelled on me on short notice. I refuse to let a pattern like this develop.

Also, I never blew up on her. I calmly told her how I felt and just hung up the phone. In no way did I raise my voice.
 

Marlimus

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You overreacted.
 

Manonamission

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Marlimus said:
You overreacted.
I disagree. Can you provide more detail behind your reasoning?

I went with my gut feeling, and my gut feeling has always been right, especially since she flaked on me last weekend as well at the LAST MINUTE.

I had plans for this girl, and she knew that we were supposed to go out, FOR A WEEK. Yet she cancels on me anyway???

No one else finds it disrespectful that she could have told me at least a day in advance? She had a week to tell her parents...

Oh well.
 

Flabbergasped?

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You should have just next'd her. Girls who flake a lot using their parents as an excuse generally aren't genuine, esp at age 19, since by then parents become more lax on their children going out with friends/dating. The ultimatum over the phone was probably too much, but you should have just allowed herself to distance, while you do the same, so you can have a clean slate to skeet on in college XD
 

Manonamission

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Flabbergasped? said:
You should have just next'd her. Girls who flake a lot using their parents as an excuse generally aren't genuine, esp at age 19, since by then parents become more lax on their children going out with friends/dating. The ultimatum over the phone was probably too much, but you should have just allowed herself to distance, while you do the same, so you can have a clean slate to skeet on in college XD
I was about to next her, but she called me back and asked to hang out today.

I do agree I may have been a little drastic, however I felt that I had to let her know where I stood. I really didn't yell at her, i told her calmly about what i thought and acted like i didnt give a ****, but i wanted her to realize that i dont tolerate flaking at the last minute at her conveniance.
 

Local Celebrity

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I don't know if I would've handled it that way, you did show her where you stand, but also came off like you were dependent on her.

One thing, you NEVER say sorry to a chick..never man.

If you have a gut feeling this chick is cheating or distancing herself from you, you distance yourself as well. If she's pulling away, and your still going hard after her, you'll come off like your a chump, and she'll lose attraction for you.

Just look at the situation, than make your move.
 

DJ4Life

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What i have learnt is that in casual relationship with a chick, never compensate for a substitude when she said she can't make it to the date.

When she said she can't come out, you said alright, see you next time and hang up, that's it. When you offered to visit her house instead, whether she was telling the truth about her parents not letting visitors or not, you protrated the image of your dependence and neediness in her subconsious. Automatically it allows her to be the dominate role of the relationship and do any bs she please, because she knwos she has the power over you.

and then you overreacted by being pissed on the phone, when she flakes, pretend it doesn't affect you in any way and carry on with your life, it will have much of an impact on her. she will be scratching her head wondering why you aren't sad or angry that she didn't turn up on the date, thus increasing her interest level on you

and local celebrity, i disagree with the no sorry to the girl thing, i did that to the last girl i had, it brings the girl down in the long run that it seems like you are disrespecting her, and besides us being DJs it is not shameful apologizing to a gal when the circumstance is appropriate, but what chumps do wrong is that they mutter sorry every 2 min for everything they do
 

Hitman10000

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Well let's see. She seems to give you mixed signals, flakey behavior, and cancellations on date.

And you do some thinking...get pissed...and finally your gut tells you she might not be interested in you.

Your gut is right, I would just cut her off and not waste any further time with her unless she asks you out, in the way where she wants to visit you (not her calling you to get you to take her out somewhere.)
 

Obie

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That ***** is just ****ing screwing with you man! **** her, you don't need that **** in your life!
 

SamePendo

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Cry me a ****ing river, you love the fvcking drama man. You surely are the type of (man) that gossips with his friends about who hooked up with who and all that **** right?

ps- someone should ban black-dragon.
 

Manonamission

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SamePendo said:
Cry me a ****ing river, you love the fvcking drama man. You surely are the type of (man) that gossips with his friends about who hooked up with who and all that **** right?

ps- someone should ban black-dragon.

You don't know me. Stop trying to bust my balls.
 

Manonamission

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Local Celebrity said:
I don't know if I would've handled it that way, you did show her where you stand, but also came off like you were dependent on her.

One thing, you NEVER say sorry to a chick..never man.

I told her I was sorry that she was put in a ****ty situation (with her dad in ****) but I told her that cancelling on me the last minute was unacceptable. I never apologized for my reaction.

I was in no way dependent. We were meeting another couple for a date, and now I had to cancel on them too. That makes me look like a flake, I don't appreciate that either.
 

Manonamission

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and then you overreacted by being pissed on the phone, when she flakes, pretend it doesn't affect you in any way and carry on with your life, it will have much of an impact on her. she will be scratching her head wondering why you aren't sad or angry that she didn't turn up on the date, thus increasing her interest level on you

I forgot to mention my post that I did not raise my voice level, and I was very calm. I simply told her what I expected, and how it was disrespectful and hung up the phone.
 
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