Woman and Social Status

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by djbr
I think the biggest issue with money, which I've never seen mentioned around here, it's not the money itself, but the feeling you get when you DON'T have it (or have less than necessary). It kills your confidence big time. When you have it, even when you don't show off, people smell it. Not the money exactly, but the easiness you get when you have a comfortable life.

I completely agree.

When I was a bartender I used to take note of how affluent people looked and acted differently than others.

It wasn't so much that they wore expensive clothes or jewelry, and I couldn't see their house or car that might influence my perception of them. There was just sort of a "glow" about them, a healthy, happy aura that radiated from them when they walked into the room. I'm sure women pick up on the same vibe.

So many people have to struggle with money. When you don't have the burden of having to worry about paying your bills and what you are going to do for money on the future, it takes a huge load off your shoulders and replaces it with an air of security and confidence that can't be replicated by any other means.

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by Bible_Belt
Telling a woman you are a "real estate investor" isn't tangible enough to boost your status in and of itself.

Really? I am surprised. Maybe people in my area of the country are so broke that they are easier to impress. I am impressed, fwiw.

That's because you have been in the financial game and can see someone for who they really are, not what they drive or where they live.

I have an amazing townhouse right smack in the most expensive part of town. People see my place and almost immediately ask "what do you do?".

On the other hand, if I tell someone that I invest for a living, more often than not they say "Oh really?" then promptly change the subject.

People who don't know any better are almost never moved by the fact that I am a full time investor, but when I tell them I also own a retail store that they see on t.v. all the time, now THAT gets their attention. It's something tangble they can actually relate to.

Believe me, I'm figuring out this status game more and more every day.

 

[Egoist]

Originally posted by STR8UP
I completely agree.

When I was a bartender I used to take note of how affluent people looked and acted differently than others.

It wasn't so much that they wore expensive clothes or jewelry, and I couldn't see their house or car that might influence my perception of them. There was just sort of a "glow" about them, a healthy, happy aura that radiated from them when they walked into the room. I'm sure women pick up on the same vibe.

So many people have to struggle with money. When you don't have the burden of having to worry about paying your bills and what you are going to do for money on the future, it takes a huge load off your shoulders and replaces it with an air of security and confidence that can't be replicated by any other means.

for once i agree with you.

and yeah, the most annoying thing in the world is trying to explain to women what it is i do. It's like if i really like a girl, i might take the time and try to explain it to her, but on average, its worthless trying to explain it to her. So i usually just say "I do business stuff"

If i ever do try to explain it, they kind of blank out and later ask some stupid sh!t like "you're not a drug dealer, are you?" :crackup:

 

[al77]

Originally posted by STR8UP
Telling a woman you are a "real estate investor" isn't tangible enough to boost your status in and of itself. When I tell women that's what I do it usually just confuses them. It's not something people look at as being a "job", so it's hard for them to fathom that you do it for a living.

Add a nice house, car, and lifestyle into the equation and it becomes a little more clear, but I have found that the title itself doesn't do much to impress.

Veyr good point about "become more clear". I agree the title by itself may not impress women if you are too direct about it.
In fact some women may think "Ohh.. he is bragging about", some "oh what does he really do?? I dont get it"...
But if you slowly, but by bit reveal what you do... and picture in her mind houses you invest into... oh, it will sure melt her heart.
It all depends how you introduce your title.
It seems to me that a dircet way is not a good one.
Slow builgin her curiosity.. revealing how much money you handle - is the way to go.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by STR8UP
I completely agree.

There was just sort of a "glow" about them, a healthy, happy aura that radiated from them when they walked into the room. I'm sure women pick up on the same vibe.

So many people have to struggle with money. When you don't have the burden of having to worry about paying your bills and what you are going to do for money on the future, it takes a huge load off your shoulders and replaces it with an air of security and confidence that can't be replicated by any other means.

Word!

Women do pick up on this vibe. But there is soe interestng extentin to it: a "bad boy" feels great regardless hwo much money he owe\owns. We all know most women love him.

A tired, stressed but rich guy would not look very appealing to women...

 

[Egoist]

lately i actually try to sort of lower my value in womens eyes, because lately i'm getting sick of little golddiggers..

i just give them a vague answer, but they still manage to put certain things together.

 

[Thomas94305]

Getting it out of being qualified?

Guys.. for us DJs, the issue isn't what social status women want. The issue is how to break out of her qualifying us and back to enjoying things. When I go engage a woman, my social status is fixed. I have so much education, money, etc etc. To be frank, I'm very educated, and I get very turned off by women that look for it up front.

What do you have that works on this front? When asked what I do, I've made up things, busted on her for being boring, etc. But I do notice, especially for a woman over 30, that often she'll keep at it. I'll even give her a dead cold stare, and say "look, whatever I do, I obviously make enough so I don't have to eat out of garbage cans... looking at you, you aren't starving either. This questioning makes no sense. You're being shallow when you could get on with being a friend and having some fun.." That often works because I've said clearly I don't care what you think, you need to drop this or I'll think you're silly.

What are your ideas for how to reframe this getting qualified garbage?

 

[Don-Rocker]

Education/Money NOT needed boys

I dated a girl for a year and half that was a lawyer, CPA and made about $60,000, I during this time was broke and getting back on my feet. She bought me trips, cloths, paid for hotels and so on.

It was because of my DJ skills, and a few other skills too.

So I am hear to say that on a certain level you do not need the money and power, poersonal power and confidence is what does it men.

 

[STR8UP]

I have a standard answer for that question.

Girl: What do you do for a living?

Me: I make money

and I will leave it at that. That's all that they need to know, and they don't NEED to know that.

They can derive from that what they want.. more than one girl assumed I sold drugs, which of course I don't

That's the problem with giving vague answers. LOTS of women are going to assume you are into some illegal sh!t. I think even my last g/f thought that I was involved in some shady dealings, even though she was with me for a long time and KNEW exactly what I do. It's hard for most people to compute if they can't put you into a nicely packaged "slot".

I have found the best thing for me is to just tell them that I am an "investor". That's something they can somewhat comprehend. then if they ask what it is I invest in, I say "real estate, business, whatever makes money". It doesn't really impress anyone but at least it satisfies their curiosity.

 

[Solomon79]

Actually, the status-related problems I find myself falling down on have little to do with money.

It's more to do with struggling against anti-culture.

I mean in any environment where sport or rap stars are worshipped over men of substance or intellect, it becomes a struggle for me.

I find in the US, the novelty of having an English accent and playing the suave debonair Englishman works VERY well. But I don't want a relationship with somebody on the other side of the planet. Ideally, I want another Englishwoman. And our cultural surroundings are in total ruin here. What I mean by this, is that the supposedly educated middle-class women find value in leftism, which is really discouraging and just not that attractive.

People are like ****ing sheep, and they don't value the right things.

This is my biggest problem by far as a DJ. I just won't accept that some ****ing rap star or bone-headed baseball player is a worthy ideal. The great politicians and artists are worthy idols. And some women go for them. But in this age, you really are going against the grain if you have more than the average number of braincells.

So for me, it's not simply a case of economics. It's values, and the way people behave in large groups - in a very anti-intellectual and effectively leftist manner, attacking people who they are threatened by, and shooting for mediocrity.