sosilky said:
This girl i dated I had totaly pinned wrong. She used to date a guy I know and everyone thought she was this little sweetheart that he just treated like crap. I've known her for years and it wasn't until i strted dating her that I realized she was kind of a barfly promiscuous girl. Shes brilliant at hiding it. almost sometimes convinces herself otherwise. Totaly threw me off.
Why does this happen? How come I can't see this girls for who they are right away? usualy i'm pretty good at that. It sucks to because grls who are realy good girls i doubt now.
1) Some people are really good at hiding who they truly are.
I'm feeling ripped apart because I was lied to by this one woman. Man, I knew women lie. But I thought I knew her. And I took her at her word when I shouldn't have, but I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt.
And near the end, she made promises, and I was skeptical, but hopeful that she was telling the truth. And I ended up more angry that I had fallen for it for even a second.
And one of the biggest things that piss me of is feeling manipulated.
And I'm still deeply hurt because I fell for her manipulation. And everyone else is manipulated by her, and it ticks me off. I want the world to see her for the liar she truly is, but, in all reality, it most likely won't happen. She'll keep being the filthy stinking liar she's always been, and because she's pretty, everyone will continue to kiss her ass and let her lie to them.
But maybe there's a little silver lining. She's marrying one of her own kind. A boy (not a man) who's a liar and a cheat. He's a former druggie. Unfortunately, they get everything in life handed to them on a silver platter. But maybe it won't always happen. One of these days, he'll cheat again, or she will, or he'll get back into drugs because of stress... whatever the situation may be. But, they both chose this.
My father was physically and emotionally abusive for 15 years. He only stopped being physically abusive because he thought I was getting big enough to become a threat should I choose to start a fight (and I chose to defend myself). He's never known how to be a true man. And I pity him, and his level of stupidity. But he doesn't deserve my sympathy. He deserves what crap he gets.
But to anyone outside of the family, he's this scrawny little put upon kindly old man who couldn't (or wouldn't) hurt a fly. He's quite good at keeping up the little picked on nerd game. Once in a while (not nearly enough) he will show his true colors in public, however. It's rare, but it happens from time to time.
But you know what? Once I'm out of the house, I'm pretty much done with him. He's f'ed up almost any possible healthy relationship with his son, and he probably won't get much time with my kids, should I have any. He'll be lucky if I choose to go to his funeral when he dies off, if we're speaking at all.
2) Alternatively, sometimes we overlook those things or see them in a different way because we want to. Sometimes it can be our fault. Sometimes. Even our radars can be off kilter, and we fall for it. We're human.