Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

when dreams are shattered..

Mr.Positive

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2007
Messages
1,858
Reaction score
100
Guys, I took one of the biggest punches that life has ever dealt me today...and I fvcking need to vent.

I've been busting my ass for the past 2 years for my dream career, out of 3000 people, I was ranked at number 8 on the list to get hired. I just found out today, that they are only hiring 6, the top 6 guys. The whole time they were supposed to hire 10, but due to the economy, budget cuts, etc..I just found this out today.

The past 2 years my life has been focused on this. I gained 20lbs in the gym, ran and trained until I threw up, I actually have scars from effort I've put into preparing for this job....and countless nights studying. Sacrifice. Passing test, after test, for the past 2 years.

Building up, 2 years of my focus...gone, just like that.

My problem, my family and friends see me as a rock. I'm the guy who can take anything, with a positive attitude. Today, man my legs feel shakey ...I feel as though I've got nowhere to vent my frustrations sometimes. I'm so fvcking pissed.

I wanted this one job more than anything. It's going to be tough to break the news to everyone that has helped me prepare.

I think I needed to vent this...it's been building up for me all day, since I found out.

In the grand scheme of things, I guess this isn't a huge deal. But to me it is... I just put in so much effort and hope, and now, I need to start for the beginning.

Anyway, I'll bounce back like always. Today I had one dream shattered...fortunately, I've got plenty more. Nonetheless, life can be crushing at times.
 

iqqi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2003
Messages
5,137
Reaction score
82
Location
Beyond your peripheral vision
Sometimes things really do happen for a reason, and we see the grand scheme when we are able to look back into the past. All that training that you did could be for the next obstacle or challenge that is going to come up. And you may find yourself somewhere better than you were able to imagine, but is now a possibility solely due to what you put yourself thorugh for this dream of yours, that may not pan out (you never know maybe two of the guys won't work out).

In the craziest circumstance, if the world really does end in 2012, then maybe your training will be the reason you are one of the ones out of a million that survive. :)

Anyways, give yourself permission to be mad as hell for a few weeks. Go through the motions. Be open to doors that may open.
 

ThunderMaverick

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
1,946
Reaction score
70
Age
42
You actually believe in the world ending around 2012, Icky?

Boy oh boy.

What did you train for exactly, Mr. P?

All training aside I've found that nothing I do in my lifetime is a waste, even if I get the feeling that it isn't enough. I'm always learning, always evolving, and as long as I'm at peace with who I am and want to be then I know I'll be okay, regardless of "failure".

You didn't fail. You got into the top 10. Out of 3000? How many in the field of whatever you want to get into can say that?

Will you be able to try for it again in the near future?
 

Mr.Positive

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2007
Messages
1,858
Reaction score
100
ThunderMaverick said:
What did you train for exactly, Mr. P?

All training aside I've found that nothing I do in my lifetime is a waste, even if I get the feeling that it isn't enough. I'm always learning, always evolving, and as long as I'm at peace with who I am and want to be then I know I'll be okay, regardless of "failure".

You didn't fail. You got into the top 10. Out of 3000? How many in the field of whatever you want to get into can say that?

Will you be able to try for it again in the near future?
Iqqi and Thunder..thanks.

I was trying for a sought-after public safety position. I'll keep trying, but the competition is tough. Thousands of people for only a few jobs. It would involve a pay cut, but give me the opportunity to get involved in helping the community.

A lot of physical training is involved. I've got a cushy office job, boring as hell, but not my calling you could say. Not all of us are meant for the office. :)

It just sucks. So close, and so much time and effort invested. I'll keep trying though. Like you said, I've got to get it out of my head that I failed, I guess you only fail when you stop trying..
 

iqqi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2003
Messages
5,137
Reaction score
82
Location
Beyond your peripheral vision
Maybe in 2012, when the world ends, because of your training to make the public safer, in which you qualified for out of 3000 other men... maybe YOU will be the leader of the group of men that rise up and save the few of us who survive, against whatever it is that destroys life as we know it today. Or maybe you will just be one hell of a soldier in that tiny army. The right hand man of the leader.

Hey. You never know!
 

ThunderMaverick

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
1,946
Reaction score
70
Age
42
iqqi said:
Maybe in 2012, when the world ends, because of your training to make the public safer, in which you qualified for out of 3000 other men... maybe YOU will be the leader of the group of men that rise up and save the few of us who survive, against whatever it is that destroys life as we know it today. Or maybe you will just be one hell of a soldier in that tiny army. The right hand man of the leader.

Hey. You never know!

I will now waste a post, just to smack-a-ho.

*smacks Iqqi for being st00pid*



Don't give up, Mr. P!!
 

ElChoclo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 6, 2005
Messages
593
Reaction score
11
Location
Sydney
If the job is so sensitive to budget cuts and other vagaries it is unlikely that you would get much security of tenure, so getting it might be one thing, but holding it another.
 

Señor Fingers

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 4, 2003
Messages
760
Reaction score
61
Location
Wherever I am.
Yo Mr. P,

Right now the biggest temptation is to listen to the voice inside your head that says "You just wasted the last 2 years of your life for NOTHING". This pure and utter BS and a form of self-sabotage. That voice wants to punish you for even trying and will do its best to convince you that your efforts are worthless.

I just put in so much effort and hope, and now, I need to start for the beginning.
^^ See, that is exactly what I am talking about. This is a LIE!

The foundation you've worked so hard for is still there. It's not like you failed the test, gained 50 pounds and lost all your strength/endurance. Remember man, you have surpassed your limits and beat out THOUSANDS of other candidates - that is pretty damn impressive!

In situations like this I always like to think of a young Michael Jordan who interestingly enough did NOT make the cut for varsity team at his school. We all know how he turned out!

The path to success is rife with speedbumps and setbacks. In the moment you hate the resistance, but looking back you will be grateful for the strength and personal resolve it formed within you.

This stroke of "bad luck" is really a gift in disguise!

NEVER stop fighting for the life you dream of!!! :box:
 

hithard

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 23, 2005
Messages
608
Reaction score
84
Location
Australia
Mr.Positive said:
Guys, I took one of the biggest punches that life has ever dealt me today...and I fvcking need to vent.

I've been busting my ass for the past 2 years for my dream career, out of 3000 people, I was ranked at number 8 on the list to get hired. I just found out today, that they are only hiring 6, the top 6 guys. The whole time they were supposed to hire 10, but due to the economy, budget cuts, etc..I just found this out today.

The past 2 years my life has been focused on this. I gained 20lbs in the gym, ran and trained until I threw up, I actually have scars from effort I've put into preparing for this job....and countless nights studying. Sacrifice. Passing test, after test, for the past 2 years.

Building up, 2 years of my focus...gone, just like that.

My problem, my family and friends see me as a rock. I'm the guy who can take anything, with a positive attitude. Today, man my legs feel shakey ...I feel as though I've got nowhere to vent my frustrations sometimes. I'm so fvcking pissed.

I wanted this one job more than anything. It's going to be tough to break the news to everyone that has helped me prepare.

I think I needed to vent this...it's been building up for me all day, since I found out.

In the grand scheme of things, I guess this isn't a huge deal. But to me it is... I just put in so much effort and hope, and now, I need to start for the beginning.

Anyway, I'll bounce back like always. Today I had one dream shattered...fortunately, I've got plenty more. Nonetheless, life can be crushing at times.
So there is absolutely no way of getting a job in this position there?
What if some of these guys don’t work out what happens?
Maybe keep in touch or something about this job, keep em buttered at least.
Never give up hope so easy (keeping in mind I have no idea what the details of said job are or how the process works)
 

Max Power

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 29, 2007
Messages
340
Reaction score
4
So you were either trying to become a firefighter or were auditioning for American Gladiators.

I know this sucks. I also was in a very competitive field where thousands apply for a single or few jobs. I'm just going to tell you that you have to continue trying and never give up on your dream.

But .... the day will come when you do get your dream job and guess what. After about 18 months it becomes a job. And if you're taking a pay cut it will only make it more of a job.
 

romangod

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2004
Messages
1,072
Reaction score
48
Location
Canada
Mr.Positive said:
Anyway, I'll bounce back like always. Today I had one dream shattered...fortunately, I've got plenty more. Nonetheless, life can be crushing at times.

Mr. Positive................. I have total faith that you will bounce back. :up:


Life can be crushing but it is what it is and nobody said it would be easy. Look at the bright side.............. You got into great shape and disciplined yourself by studying and working hard. Don't underestimate your effort. You're not starting from the beginning again. Everything you put into this effort will pay dividends in the future and this will just be a blip on your road to a healthy, happy life. I wish you the best and most of all stay "Mr. Positive".



Cheers!
 

decades

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2004
Messages
1,224
Reaction score
34
Location
sf ca
the dream is not shattered, just deferred. :up:
 

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,376
Reaction score
4,401
Most successful people share a Mantra,

"Everything happens for a Reason"

Now go find your reason. :yes:
 

reset

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2007
Messages
2,202
Reaction score
59
Mr.Positive said:
The past 2 years my life has been focused on this. I gained 20lbs in the gym, ran and trained until I threw up, I actually have scars from effort I've put into preparing for this job....and countless nights studying. Sacrifice. Passing test, after test, for the past 2 years.
Dude I admire the self-discipline. From my perspective, you accomplished quite a lot. The same qualites you developed can't help but stay with you, you can't help but apply them to the other parts of your life and your future. You trained for SOMETHING...
 

MacAvoy

Banned
Joined
May 10, 2003
Messages
2,940
Reaction score
35
Location
Northern Ontario
Here's my advice. Take a week off. Either just relax or go and blow off some steam. Maybe take a trip or do something crazy / off the board that you normally wouldn't do or spend a little bit of your savings on something that you've always wanted.

Then after that, come back and reflect upon what happened. Then decide where you want to go from here. Life sucks, it isn't fair. You put in a lot of hard work, made the cut, only to have the system fvck you over. Thats life. The good thing is like a few others have eluded to, look how much you improved yourself these past two years. Out of 3000 people who made the committment, your in the top 8, thats means that your better than 75% of the people in the top 1%. Your in a very elite class.

Not many people can make that type of committment and stick to it, let alone do so well. Now the next question is, where do you want to harness these talents for next. Is there a class next year. Can you go to a different city.

I'm not good at citing specific examples but many people have had colossal failures before they made it big. So take a break, enjoy some of the things that you sacrificed for the last two years and enjoy life my friend.
 

The Bat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 12, 2007
Messages
1,035
Reaction score
60
Here is a great thread about failures and successful people:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=133908

I always liked to think that it is not your dream that gets shattered, rather it is your spirit that gets shattered. And in circumstances as this, understandably so. It's alright to come here and vent to strangers with text for faces. Get the frustration off your chest awhile.

What is your next plan? Are you planning on re-applying?
 

Latinoman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
4,031
Reaction score
57
Mr. Positive,

I hope I did not use all my ten posts in the last 24 hours as I want to make sure I post in this thread as time is of essence.

I am very sorry to hear that. Don’t lose hope. Don’t lose your dream. Top 8 out of 3000 is impressive. In fact, typically there is not too much distinction between #4 and #10.

Instead of cheering you up…I will tell you what I would do. This is what I would do…I will write a “thank you” letter (very professional, etc.) to the hiring authority, the management, the interviewer and any other person with hiring authority.

In that “thank you” letter you will obviously thank them because they considered you for the job. Tell them that this was your dream job and all those hours sacrificing your body, sacrificing your time to study, sacrificing other things in the last two years were NOT done for nothing. The fact that you finished number 8 in the list and did not make the final cut by a mere two applicants has made you stronger and more determine. You are thanking them because they have made you a better person.

Also tell them that you still very interested in future openings, etc. And why it was your dream to work for them.


You see? By sending that letter, you are putting yourself ABOVE the other 7 applicants. In fact, you will stop been a number. You will in fact become a person. And anything can happen. Maybe somebody got hurt or changed his mind or fail the drug test or lied in his application…creating an opening. And you will position yourself for the opening.

The worst thing that could happen is that they create new openings next few months...and you reapply (assuming they don't contact you directly as a letter can be a powerful tool). But here is the thing...no more #8 or #20 or # 50. You will become Mr. Positive instead.
 

DJ Noble

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 7, 2008
Messages
36
Reaction score
0
Location
Philadelphia
"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career.
I've lost almost 300 games.
26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed.
I've failed over and over and over again in my life.

And that is why I succeed."

- Michael Jordan
 
Top