Whats the deal with chicks that have a bunch of male friends

[CuriousGirl]

Let's peel away the onion.

I have never not once met or found a god's honest to truth woman, never not once.

It is like women claim they are vessels of higher virtue, to assume you knew exactly what my GF meant more than I do because she is simply 'female' is testament to the sister hood that goes hand in hand with female speak.

I think I know what my GF meant, you know I have been dating her for nigh on 5 years now.

To assume you know what she meant more than I do due to some female intuition further points out to the dishonest or truth twisting ways of the female mind when it comes to exposing the opposite sex.

Why can't you simply accept what she said was the truth, why does it have to be glossed over, spun and mixed around to have some softer, safer more female friendly meaning? A further illustration to the female double speak that can go on, why even respond to what I wrote? It is like skipping over the fact that I stated 'my GF' and then defending the female gender, because you know, me being a man, obviously read the situation wrongly.

On the contrary I read the situation right in all its female double speak glory, I simply presented the truth, something that women simply do not like to be presented with in situations like this, amongst others.

My GF actually apologised to me the second she said those words, because she knows I wouldn't approve, but they came out anyway, slipped right out of her dainty little mouth - I said to her afterwards "don't worry about it, if some loser wants to impress a woman he is dating by being a mug then that is his problem not mine"

As for dating a girl like my girl, your all pretty much the same, I just wade through your BS and accept what you are - but with a very good filter and in the shape of things the reason she is my girl is because she is up there with a small % of woman that are actually worth dating past simply fuc*ing.

As far as I am concerned, I'd rather date a girl who is honest than one who frequents sites for men offering tips to men on dating woman - but that's just me so take no notice. It is fitting in one paragraph you defended the actions of my GF because she was female, but you know just in case it was a blip then my girl is an exception to the rule and clearly a 'bad choice' because women 'simply are not like that' - let's cut the BS shall we.

That's not what it was like at all, I would have said the same if it was 'your boyfriend' that said it. To me if a man or woman had said that I would have assumed they were joking and would have been shocked if they actually meant it. That's why I doubted your interpretation. And from the content of your reply I am still sceptical about it, your thinking behind it, I don't mean to come across as rude but it seems as though had she been joking you wouldn't have liked it either and her apologising, to you confirmed it as being serious when it might not have been. But I'll take your word for it that she was serious and that's a shame, and I can't believe you think all women are like that and group all women in the same boat. And that's why I'm sceptical, because to me that implies your perspective or attitude towards women and gender divide isn't a balanced one, it's far too absolute in my opinion. There are differences between men and women, yes, but men aren't all this and women aren't all the other, some people are this and some people are the other, it seems to me that you're off-loading too much onto gender.

 

[EA Gold]

Most girls these days are transformed humanoids of the media. They are TV, Music, Movies, Magazines and text messaging incarnate in real life.

They care not about family or Christian beliefs, instead of Christ and parents their role models are Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus and Katy Perry who are Attention W's. They strive for social value by adding as many guys into their friends list, spending hours fixing their hair and make up and texting a much as possible about what they are doing at that moment. They care not for the poor or suffering, what life is all about is who's doing who and where to buy the latest clothing.

Even with all these distractions their life is still empty and who do they fill it with? Dozens among dozens of guys who worship her and every step she takes. Yes, there's even guys who have been turned into girl worshiping humanoids as well. And when she gives her special hand signal, that's when she ready to be F#####.

And that's the deal with chicks that have a bunch of male friends. But as for me I've transformed back into a Human, and I pray that the spell on you will be broken.

 

[jonwon]

That's not what it was like at all, I would have said the same if it was 'your boyfriend' that said it. To me if a man or woman had said that I would have assumed they were joking and would have been shocked if they actually meant it. That's why I doubted your interpretation. And from the content of your reply I am still sceptical about it, your thinking behind it, I don't mean to come across as rude but it seems as though had she been joking you wouldn't have liked it either and her apologising, to you confirmed it as being serious when it might not have been. But I'll take your word for it that she was serious and that's a shame, and I can't believe you think all women are like that and group all women in the same boat. And that's why I'm sceptical, because to me that implies your perspective or attitude towards women and gender divide isn't a balanced one, it's far too absolute in my opinion. There are differences between men and women, yes, but men aren't all this and women aren't all the other, some people are this and some people are the other, it seems to me that you're off-loading too much onto gender.

There are always exceptions to the rule.

But in my whole 35 years from experience of many women, friends, relations, this forum amongst others, paints a picture of how women actually are, rather then what women like others to believe they are.

Your post is expected and typically female, you've not said it in the post, but it is clear it's formed in the manner to try to 'shame me' into compliance, mixed in with the moral higher virtue all women seem to adopt when confronted with truth.

Also leave out the gender argument nonesense this has no bearing on the subject and again is another smoke and mirror tactic to try to shift the debate or argument into an area that has no bearing on the original topic - I like the emotive use of 'unloading all this onto one gender' and tossing in that; men do this too - we are not discussing what 'men' do. We have already covered the part that beta men play in the role, something you've clearly ignored in your need to try to push the debate down a different path - I doubt you've done it intentionally, usually when a women get's into a debate it can shift due to an outbreak of emotional out-pouring that has no relivence to the subject.

 

[xHiGHPoTeniaL]

Damn, i'm still kinda torn about what to think about the chick that i started this post because of. She asked me AGAIN last night about being her boyfriend and I just told her flat out i'm not ready for that. I have no idea how long i can keep that up tho.

As far as this where this thread is going, I only have like one female "friend." We're both attractive ppl and just like IQQI said with her friend, we've gone out to clubs together and hooked each other up with other ppl there/friends. Now I kno, for the most part (besides when she slaps my ass jokingly), she's not rly feeling me in a sexual way(she def wouldn't chill like we do tho if i was some ugly ass dude w/ no game). BUT i am a man so i'm not gunna lie: Deep down I wouldn't mind one bit having sex with her, but thats true of alomst every damn attrative chick i've ever met.

BUT any type of relationship past that would never work cuz she gets on my nerves after we chill for awhile and she has NO LTR potential so it rly doesnt bother me. So in that way i guess we kinda use each other and the dynamic is completely different compared to my male friends. She's also rly flirty and touchy w/ everyone which leads "beta" male friends of hers to believe they actually have a chance. And its crazy the amount of shyt they go thru just to please her. very sad actually. But thats on them. I just find it hilarious that she won't admit to knowing that they wanna fuk her either, just like you IQQI.

Do me a favor IQQI, since u wont answer my q's, ask ur buddy if he would ever have sex with u. U may not like the answer tho lol. (unless like i said ur ugly, but the more i read i dbt that)

 

[Kailex]

High:

The problem with asking satellite boys whether they'd be willing and able to go at it is that most of them are seasoned AFC's who will most likely deny that they are just in it for "sex". Only a handful will accept the fact that they are holding an imaginary number in their hands, hoping it's theirs next.

You've got to stop focusing on one specific woman and her story. Let's say that Iqqi could very well be the exception, but if she is the exception, doesn't that prove the existence of the rule about red flags surrounding women that have too many men in their army of minions?

If a lot of us are telling you about the commonality of a woman with too many MALE friends... isn't that a tell-tale sign of the problems you might face?

Of course, it's generalizing, but do you see this possible target of yours as a woman who would easily ditch you for a night out with her friends? Do you see these guys as very tough competition?


Nevermind that... do you see her as a GREAT potential LTR? As a person... forgetting the red flag of her friends... how is she outside of those parameters?

 

[iqqi]

I predicted your fall out with your last BF and I was right on the money.

IQQI I ment no offence, I personnally think you should stick around your a great example of how women operate, your a great addition to the forum.

You are a great example of how when men get old, they become senile and lose their memory. Me and the BF are still together, and we have never even had a fight, so what are you talking about?

A great example of you twisting things and spewing mistruths. You are really only going to see what you want to see, even if it is a purple unicorn in place of a hot dog stand. I didn't bother to read anything else you wrote.

 

[iqqi]

Do me a favor IQQI, since u wont answer my q's, ask ur buddy if he would ever have sex with u. U may not like the answer tho lol. (unless like i said ur ugly, but the more i read i dbt that)

I never once said that my male friends would not have sex with me. They are men! Most of them would probably love to! And some of them might actually decline, considering some things I won't even bother to try to bring up here.

The thing you fail to realize is that for most of them, sex or no sex is not the motivating factor in our friendship! That is just too crazy of a concept for you to understand. And maybe some of my male friends are using me and vice versa for social life reasons, just like some of your male friends are using YOU and vice versa. I would consider them seasonal friends. Has nothing to do with gender. Then again on the other hand of that, some of my best friends are men, and this would be decade+ relationships, through hell and high water.

 

[jonwon]

You are a great example of how when men get old, they become senile and lose their memory. Me and the BF are still together, and we have never even had a fight, so what are you talking about?

A great example of you twisting things and spewing mistruths. You are really only going to see what you want to see, even if it is a purple unicorn in place of a hot dog stand. I didn't bother to read anything else you wrote.

The last post I read from you over a year+, was you posting how the BF was boring you to death and you was seriously thinking about ditching him.

This was the nice guy who told you, you was his world after meeting him for a short time, wanted to spend every waking moment with you, spent most of his time trying to contact you (almost sufficatingly so) and was sickingly nice - about god dam everything.

But then again I also stated that you'd love that sort of attention, hence why at the time I stated you'd probably keep a guy like that around because it feeds your ego and you have rather a large one (not a bad thing, the world would be boring if we where all the same).

So if your still with the guy, fair enough but still doesn't take away from the fact you was posting very negatively about him the last time I checked, that forum is dead now so I cant pull the post, but if I get that impression you seperated it's because you gave it.

The reason I say my post was spot on was because I predicted the fall out from the final post I read from you about the guy - It was text book girl on her feelings about the nice guy in her life - you have to admit this guy took this piss when it came to being a bit of a door-mat, the only saving grace for the guy was in your own words 'he is very good looking and well built and has pritty much everything a guy could want' - hence if your with him I suspect he is counter-balancing the door mat persona, or since the relationship has gone on, he's probably toned it down (not that you'd ever admit it) - or you ignored it because, you know he is just 'that hot' -

Women shallow? Never.

I don't for one second think you'd respond to this post with actual truth, what you will no doubt do is spin the truth like your protecting the president - women would make great spin docters, now good luck to you and your relationship, but the reason your with this guy is has you stated many a time, is because he is attractive and has good financial standing, not because he is doormat nice, but no doubt you've most probably rationalized his puppy dog love to be actually great, so I doubt you'll respond about that issue, but to me that's a good thing, if he is your bloke you should hold him to the highest regard, but in terms of your posting history that as not always been true.

This must be your longest relationship, I can see wedding bells.

 

[Commandante]

I dont think all of a womens guy mates are trying to get with her.

Every time I hung out with chicks I have one of the following 3 thought in my head:

- Wow, it would be nice to fvck her!
- Wow, my buddy wants to fvck her!
- Wow, she may have hot girlfriends. It would be nice to fvck them.

If you have a job, hobbies, friends and you do sport on regular basis then you wouldn´t waste your precious free time on chicks you are not interested in!

i hooked them up with a couple of my girl mates and they are both in LTR's and still good friends.

Yep, the 3rd point.

 

[zekko]

Me and the BF are still together

Wait a minute. So you have a boyfriend but you go out on "dates" with your friend and go dance in the club and meet guys. Nice.
As stated below:

Tonight I have a "date" (as in plans) with my friend Shan. We are going to go grab some food and drinks (on me), then we will probably go to a new club in town and dance. I will probably dance with boys, he will probably dance with girls. If there are no good guys to dance with or creepy (I said it!) guys, or if a girl turns him down, we will dance with each other and show her what she is missing. He will probably buy me a drink or even two since I bought dinner.

Or is the boyfriend just A boyfriend and not supposedly exclusive (emphasis supposedly)?

In which case, pay attention guys. Because hasn't it been said that ALL girls have boyfriends? Iqqi here would probalby tell you she has a boyfriend, but obviously she's still willing to club it up with you. This is the sort of behavior that earns an instant "next".

 

[iqqi]

Jonwon, you always have a backup explanation for everything, doncha? :crazy:

You even covered every base you could think of in this past explanation. It's a bad thing if the relationship didn't last, it's a bad thing if it DID last. And here are Jonwon's many reasons why! Pick one, any one! They all come with something damning to say about iqqi. Brother, get a grip.

And no, this is not my longest relationship. Which I guess is a bad thing once Jonwon brings his paintbrush to my post again! Either way, I think you've made it clear in this thread to at least a few nonjaded readers that you see everything with sh!t color glasses. And once you have made a statement proving your position, and it is proven wrong, you have another statement to cover your position regardless. That's pretty much an impossible argument to have with someone. In Jonwon's cyber world, iqqi is definitely one of those soul destroying woman-beasts.

Fare thee well, bitter old man.

 

[iqqi]

Wait a minute. So you have a boyfriend but you go out on "dates" with your friend and go dance in the club and meet guys. Nice.
As stated below:

In which case, pay attention guys. Because hasn't it been said that ALL girls have boyfriends? Iqqi here would probalby tell you she has a boyfriend, but obviously she's still willing to club it up with you. This is the sort of behavior that earns an instant "next".

OK, first of all, a lot of what I wrote was "in general". Maybe that will clear some of that up for you. NO I do not go to the club to meet guys, but even when I was single, I wasn't going to the club to meet guys. I was going to dance. I am usually only open to friendship with people, I value my freedom when I am single and it takes a lot to even get on my radar like that. Second of all...

Dancing in a club is a next to you? Or are you just insecure about your girl having guy friends? Guy friends that they dance in a club with?

I love to dance, my boyfriend does not. If he was really insecure, or on some footloose preacher parent type sh!t about NO DANCING IT IS THE DEVILS WORK, then yeah, we might have problems. But that is not the case. My boyfriend is even a very jealous BF at times, but dancing, whether it is by myself (a majority of the time), with a male friend, or even with a male stranger, doesn't really bother my boyfriend. I don't see why it would?

I mean, for the record since you might not know and it's natural for people to read into things in the worst light here, I do not "grind" or hump or anything retarded when I dance at a club. The times my boyfriend has come to the club with me and seen me dance (AND hung out with my male friends), he has enjoyed watching. I am a good dancer. And I personally don't consider dancing a form of cheating, but I guess some do here?

And this is really besides the point, but I really don't dance with anyone very much. I like to dance alone more than I do with someone else. If and when I DO dance with someone else, I usually end up dancing away before a song even ends. My partners are nameless and faceless to me. YES iqqi is USING guys here!

So as far as this statement goes: Iqqi here would probalby tell you she has a boyfriend, but obviously she's still willing to club it up with you.

First, I think you made this statement a little bit out of context.

But YES you have it right, my friend. I WILL tell you I have a boyfriend, and I WILL still go out to the club and dance the night away! But this doesn't really apply because my guy friends are already aware of my relationship, so I wouldn't need to actually "tell" them. ? As far as my boyfriend goes... if I ever met a guy who had a problem with me dancing then they would probably get nexted, too! So it is safe to say that we (iqqi and zekko) would not even make it to BF/GF stage, sadly enough.

DISCLAIMER FOR INNOCENT LURKERS: at this point in time it has been made to seem like iqqi is an AW, with a bunch of male orbiters, with a boyfriend, whom she leaves at home every weekend to go dance with AND MEET! random guys at the club.

The true story is that iqqi has only met a handful of people in the new city she moved to a year ago, that she would actually consider as friends. MOST of these are indeed of the male variety, as stated in my opening post here in this thread. And all of these friends were met well before the BF came into the picture. There has never been any hanky panky, and all of these guys friends (not many but I know how the sosuave male mind works here when they here such a damning word as ALL) are well aware that we are FRIENDS, not friend with benefits down the line.

iqqi also rarely hangs out with her friends, is with her BF 95% of her life these days, and probably makes plans with her friends 1-2 times a month. When out and gasp dancing, she NEVER meets new and random guys. She is one of those snobbish girls you hate because she either won't make eye contact with you if you are trying, will act like she did not hear you, or will engage you in conversation, but drop the boyfriend bomb on you if you come across as wanting to continue the conversation at another time, and NO, she will not follow it up with "but we can be friends and still hang out."

 

[iqqi]

Since there is so much distrust on this forum towards women, and anything that comes out of their mouth, I will in good faith illustrate all of my guy friend relationships to you caring forum members, and see if that possibly lightens up your viewpoints.

There is Tim. Tim is an old coworker from iqqiville, who moved to the NewCity years ago. We catch a blues club together once in a blue moon to catch up and talk sh!t about our former place of employment.

There is Shan. I met Shan at a gay club, he was there with his gay male friend, who tried to hook us up since we were both straight. Unfortunately, the stars were not aligned in that aspect however we did like each other enough to be friends and hang out repeatedly, as friends.

Then there are the Portuguese guys. (Note: nationalities may have been changed to protect the identities of parties.) I met these guys one night when I went to a jazz club alone when I first moved to the city. I had taken up a large booth, and there was nowhere to sit for anyone else coming in. I shared my booth first with a bickering couple, and then I shared the last few seats with the Portuguese. We have been friends ever since then.

I used to have a gay male friend, but that ended once it became clear he was struggling with his sexuality. And I had another male friend from iqqiville, but he was clearly used to the hookup culture between so called "friends", and we aren't "friends" anymore either.

All of these friendships began (or in two cases ended) before I even met my current BF.

 

[wait_out]

iqqi... didn't you just give me some valuable advice about not letting the judgements of other people, get inside my head?

 

[iqqi]

iqqi... didn't you just give me some valuable advice about not letting the judgements of other people, get inside my head?

You are right, WO. I just hate to see so much distrust towards women in the forums. It always gets me, every time! Especially when they take what I have said and paint it some way to illustrate another sad way of thinking. I think I have said enough here, people are going to read into it how they want, or in some cases, the only way they are socially/emotionally equipped to.

My parting words to this thread: Guys and girls can be just friends, and oftentimes GREAT friends. There is more to life, and women, then just sex. If you are questioning a woman's friendships with men, then either it is because she is not trustworthy indeed, OR the case may be that you are yourself very insecure. Work on that. Either the part where you are dating loose women, or the part where you are insecure. Sometimes being insecure will make you THINK that you are dating a loose woman. You will need to see through that if you are going to make the correct adjustments to live a better, more suave life.

Adios.

 

[zekko]

Iqqi, I checked your age on your profile, and you're 28.
Now I have to admit that people in their 20s are generally more casual about this sort of thing, partly because their commitments are not usually as solid. I was spinning plates at your age myself.
But at 49, I have no patience for a girlfriend going out clubbing with other men, not if she's going to be considered LTR material. I would consider that disrespectful.

I've seen women go into marriage and try to keep this "free" attitude from their youth, where they still will want to go out and do stuff with "male friends", and it usually ends up causing trouble. Eventually they will find one they're attracted to, the temptations start, and they end up cheating.

I understand your mindset, especially if you like to dance. I probably had a similar mindset at one time myself. But as I've gotten older and seen what's happened with people, I've moved away from it. It's too much of a case of having your cake and eating it too. Feminism has probalby encouraged this idea in women also, telling them they're entitled to everything.

iqqi also rarely hangs out with her friends, is with her BF 95% of her life these days, and probably makes plans with her friends 1-2 times a month. When out and gasp dancing, she NEVER meets new and random guys.

Are you aware you're starting to refer to yourself in the third person?

 

[EA Gold]

You are right, WO. I just hate to see so much distrust towards women in the forums.

Actions speak louder then words iqqi, 15-20 years ago I would say most people here including me would be more trusting and respecting upfront toward women since they dressed like normal people and were more conservative.

Now, when you go out to the malls and clubs and 3 out 4 women you see are replicas of britney spears, lady gaga and look like prostitutes. Its more harder to give women respect and trust generally unless they have earned it, in a committed relationship without outside interference also known as orbiters or guy male friends.

And its not your fault, it has alot to do with the media agenda through music, tv and magazines. They wanted a more loose and sexual promiscuous society, and it took them a few decades to do it but they got what they wanted. And you and countless women are the result of that agenda.

 

[jonwon]

My parting words to this thread: Guys and girls can be just friends, and oftentimes GREAT friends. There is more to life, and women, then just sex. If you are questioning a woman's friendships with men, then either it is because she is not trustworthy indeed, OR the case may be that you are yourself very insecure. Work on that. Either the part where you are dating loose women, or the part where you are insecure. Sometimes being insecure will make you THINK that you are dating a loose woman. You will need to see through that if you are going to make the correct adjustments to live a better, more suave life.

First off, bitter old man? Your almost the same age, and me being a man, we age better. Men age like fine wine, women age like milk - whilst my financial income increases, you marketability decreases. I ain't bitter, but you maybe when you push 40.

Anyway.

I wasn't going to reply, but I had to after seeing this so called piece of wisdom from you.

You describe men being insecure whilst you think nothing wrong at all with going to clubs with a male friend and dancing with other men.

Yeh a real catch.

Your ok for a quick fling a rumble in the sack, but you aint exactly marriage or mother material (who will be left holding the kid) now are you. So in parts let's cut the shaming language on; 'if a man chooses to not date a woman with male friends'! More often than not that woman is EXACTLY LIKE YOU, In that she can't see anything wrong with going out with the male friends and if you don't like it your an insecure man.

I aint suprised your still with your BF I can't see how any other guy would put up with that shi*, I know I wouldn't.

My girl doesn't have male friends and she definatly wouldn't call me insecure if she turned up one day and said "hey you know I've met this cool guy, we are hitting a club, I love to dance and since you can't dance, i'll be doing it with other men, you ok with that" - "WHAT YOUR NOT OK, WITH THAT, you must be INSECURE". A man can see the irony, but you, never! (BTW why can't you go to a club and dance with FEMALE FRIENDS, my girl does it I dont mind one bit, and she not once dances with other men, because I cant dance)

LoL.

And you come on here giving advice.

For the love of all things good, guys if your reading this, if you want a life of drama, shaming language and compliance with a party girl - date girls like IQQI, but if you want a girl you can last the long haul with who wont be spinning you drama like an episode of Eastenders - avoid like the plague.

IQQI your a perfect example of a typical western female -

That's not being insecure, that's having the OPTIONS to pass over girls like you, i've slept with more girls like you than I can remember, your exactly the type of girl why I remained single for about 6 years and just fuc*ed about - thankfully not all girls think like you do.

Edit - we've almost had the full range of shaming language. If any guy needs more evidence of how a woman will shame you into compliance, look no further than this thread.

We've almost had the full spectrum, well done IQQI you couldn't have done better if I'd handed you a script.

This is a great piece on shaming techniques (I'm not a MRA, I just found this from google, and it's right on the money):

http://exposingfeminism.wordpress.com/shaming-tactics/

P.S. IQQI I'm never Jealous about my GF she gives me no reason to be, unlike your BF it seems "My boyfriend is even a very jealous BF at times". But I suppose him being a MAN that's his problem, after all you seem to lay it down like it's a GOOD THING.

 

[blueline]

My current girl literally has like two female friends and a gay bff she hangs out with on weekends. If she isn't the center of attention at a party, she feels left out and might come to me crying asking to leave the party because "nobody likes her there."

She's one of those girls that's always been super awkward conversationally and never figured out how to have a conversation that isn't self-centered. So, naturally, most girls will not want to talk to her. Guys will put up with the self-centeredness and emotional wonkiness simply to **** her. She needs to do a lot of personal development.

 

[EA Gold]

Since girls are texting at even younger ages, its easier for them now to have dozens of orbiters at their finger tips. Basically they put their number out there like its an ad, and the moment of boredom or frustration they can summon one of her minions to comfort her, and buy her stuff.