What would you make of this?

[Jon55]

My girlfriend today told me something really interesting that I'm not entirely sure how to feel about.

We've been dating around 6 months and she has been very into me, sex has been great, our relationship is strong. Her previous boyfriends were either controlling, immature, clingy, or all of the above and would make her cry a lot (by breaking up with her, her breaking up with him, etc.). She tells me loves being with me because I'm such a man and rarely ever get jealous. She gets jealous on occasion over things but never throws fits or anything. She's told me before that she knows I am not afraid of losing her because she wouldn't leave me.

But she told me she feels like out of all her boyfriends (me included), I love her the least passionately. Now we tell each other "I love you" (she said it first) and have passionate sex, and are very playful with each other. She said she knows I love her a lot and am faithful, but felt like I loved her the least passionately. So this really threw me off. I don't know what to make of it.

 

[Allurre]

Jon, don't worry about it. Don't even sweat it.

What she's trying to suggest is for you to pump up more 'affectionate actions'.

You don't need to increase the frequency of saying 'I love you.'

Rather, let your actions say it. Do something creative like making a handmade 'business card' that says Jon (loves) yourgirlsname .. Call xxxxx for confirmation.

Originality always melts the heart.

 

[Nutz]

My girlfriend today told me something really interesting that I'm not entirely sure how to feel about.

We've been dating around 6 months and she has been very into me, sex has been great, our relationship is strong. Her previous boyfriends were either controlling, immature, clingy, or all of the above and would make her cry a lot (by breaking up with her, her breaking up with him, etc.). She tells me loves being with me because I'm such a man and rarely ever get jealous. She gets jealous on occasion over things but never throws fits or anything. She's told me before that she knows I am not afraid of losing her because she wouldn't leave me.

But she told me she feels like out of all her boyfriends (me included), I love her the least passionately. Now we tell each other "I love you" (she said it first) and have passionate sex, and are very playful with each other. She said she knows I love her a lot and am faithful, but felt like I loved her the least passionately. So this really threw me off. I don't know what to make of it.

This is actually good. What she's complaining about is this new feeling she's not used to when guys don't put her on a pedestal and worship the ground she walks on. Keep up the good work and leave her wanting more. Remember the 3:2 ratio of affection. For example, for every 3 "I love you" statements you get from her, give her two in return--and her's should be first if at all possible.

Remember, the person who is least invested in the relationship holds the most power. And the person that holds the most power is the one who is most often chased. Just be careful not to overdo it and push her away by making her think you don't care about her or are being deliberate and manipulating her or something like that.

 

[mtlwlu]

the two previous posts hit it right on the head. Its further proof to show that youre unique and different from her past boyfriends, if anything youre doing everything right. If you guys go out for a night on the town, dont tell her where youre going leave her guessing, everyone likes surprises.

 

[Jon55]

This is actually good. What she's complaining about is this new feeling she's not used to when guys don't put her on a pedestal and worship the ground she walks on. Keep up the good work and leave her wanting more. Remember the 3:2 ratio of affection. For example, for every 3 "I love you" statements you get from her, give her two in return--and her's should be first if at all possible.

Remember, the person who is least invested in the relationship holds the most power. And the person that holds the most power is the one who is most often chased. Just be careful not to overdo it and push her away by making her think you don't care about her or are being deliberate and manipulating her or something like that.

Thank you guys. That's pretty much what I figured but just had to have a second opinion. She also mentioned she's only been in weird/crappy relationships so she doesn't really feel like she knows what a normal healthy one should be like, hence when she felt that way. In any case, I figured it wasn't a bad thing. Thanks again guys.

 

[Interceptor]

Jon, what she is describing as "Passion" is actually "OBSESSION".
She's confusing the two , I believe.


She is used to needy/crazy/clingy guys who cannot control themselves.

So she isnt used to this dynamic of you being mostly in control of your moods and emotions.
Be careful of what women ask for , sometimes what they WANT is not what they NEED.
And because even sometimes they dont know what they NEED, you will benefit from paying close attention to your partner and discovering what her needs are.

So for right now, I would also suggest to not necessaily increase the amount of times you say "I love you".
Thats not what she is needing or wanting.

But if I were you I would probably be increasing some of the passion in the bedroom, not writing love notes or saying "I love you" more often. Thats not passion. Thats romance.
She is confusing passon with obsession, but she wants to feel more ravished, more desired, more like losing herself in your passion and lust for her.
So go out and make her deeply feel like a woman.