What To Do When You Have Nothing.

dmvdav

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I am 24 years old, and decided tonight was my last night at my job. I keep getting less hours because my managers don't fire people, just give them one or two hours a week and increase workload so they eventually quit. I am broke, and have bills to pay, but at least I live with my parents so I don't have to worry about being evicted.

I come from a low-middle class family, lead by my mother, while my dad sat silently watching the Lifetime channel. Being taught to "follow my dreams" I went to art school and got a degree in film. I'm sure many posters here know how absolutely useless that degree is. I learned it the hard way.

I've always been able to get along with all types of people, but my introverted personality kills me in the workplace because I can't play the politics game. I don't have many social connections, or family which makes it hard to find work. All I want is personal freedom, and stability and I know SoSuave is full of people who understand the challenges men face in modern society. My family has nothing, and I will inherit nothing. I have nothing to lose, except my car, and without my car I have nothing.

What should I do? With nothing to lose, I have freedom to do anything, but I'm tied down by debts. All I want is freedom. What should I do?
 

Atom Smasher

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Freedom is a fantasy.

You live within a system, and your job is to figure out how to work the system in your favor. Trying to unplug from the world system to attain this mythical "freedom" will perpetuate being an aimless drifter.

Figure out how you can add value to people's lives and then create a business around it.

I have a degree in film making, too. I couldn't stand the sophomoric mindset of the industry so I couldn't stomach being involved with it. However it served me well in tangential ways... you can become a millionaire with a film degree and never shoot another piece of film in your life.
 
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RagingBalls

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I feel ya. I was raised by an alcoholic verbally abusive father. Having to endure my childhood life being constantly bullied by my older brother. I left home when i was 16 and went to my uncle and worked part-time in his business as a utility kid. Life's hard for some of us. That's the way it is. My teen life wasn't fun. Until i saw some priviledge kids and realized how shltty my life. How it svcks. Seeing this kids was a motivation for me, i dunno if there's life after death and we only have one life to live. It motivated me to help myself, regardless of the situation there's hope if you think there's hope. Looking back, i can say i've conquered my insecurities in my own way. It might not that inspiring but for me, i'm proud of it.

Just like TheException said. When you have nothing...make something.
 

Cremasta

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dmvdav said:
I went to art school and got a degree in film. I'm sure many posters here know how absolutely useless that degree is. I learned it the hard way.
First thing you do is try to get yourself a job.
That's the obvious part. Money = Freedom.

What might not be obvious to you, is that while you might think your degree in film as a whole is useless, there may be other industries that you could do.
What you want to think about is your 'transferable skills'... how can you apply them to different workplaces.
Look back over your grades, what units were you good at? What skills did they give you individually?

Your degree might not be opening too many doors for you, but it demonstrates two things about you that employers like to see:
1. You've got the ability to learn
2. You've got the aptitude to stick at something till you finish it.

I'm in a position to employ people, and trust me that these two 'intangible' traits are pretty important and any halfway intelligent employer will know this.
 

SgtSplacker

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Man at 24 years old I had nothing also. Now that I made something for myself the feeling of doing it by myself is awesome. Just keep at it man with a degree like that you need to be persistent to succeed.
 

MOTU

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Yea dude nothing to lose is a powerful position! Maybe it's time to move to some cool foreign land for a while. Learn to tend bar, you can always get by on that wherever you go. See things. Experience things. Live for a while.
 

Epimanes

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Here's the thing. Its very difficult to have a positive outlook when your full of negative energy. Find something that rejuvinates you. Hit the gym or something, anything that puts a smile on your face to bring back a positive attitude. Once you gain this perspective a positive outlook will be a lot clearer. We all have tons of stuff to change/fix/deal with etc. Prioritize the things you need to deal with and take care of them one at a time. If you look too hard at the big picture instead of dividing this big picture into little pictures it gives you a false feeling of doom. Divide up the big picture into bits and deal with only a few things at once. As you take care of all the little pictures/pieces you want to accomplish the big picture will take place and give you a feeling of accomplishment.

Epi
 

dmvdav

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Espi said:
You can walk away from your debts if you want to. You're free to do that...
What would happen if I did that? Realistically, and worst case scenario. Right now I feel like such an idiot, because I'll make a credit card payment, just so I can use the card to pay other payments. It's never getting paid off.
I know it's not relevant, but the credit card debt is because I had to pay tuition for a few quarters. I have student loans, which are currently deferred, but my credit card debt is also from school.

Espi said:
It seems to me that you are depending on others for your freedom and stability.
That's the position I'm trying to get out of. It's hard when there is nothing else to turn to.

There are some really good posts in this thread. I really appreciate it. It's what I needed to read.

Like AtomSmasher said, it seems like I'm moving more towards "aimless drifter" than working towards anything, and I am full of negative energy. Yesterday I was able to write and record some music with my friend, and it felt really good to finally do that again.
My biggest problem is everything costs money, and now I'm at the point where I have to constantly be on my toes, because I know that last dollar is going to be spent soon.
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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You have your health I am assuming, You have political freedom, you have a brain, you have a family.

You have many things some people in this world aren't lucky enough to have. As for your career and future? Thats all on you. How bad do you want it? how bad do you want to be successful? Are you constantly making moves to get your closer to your goals? Do you even have any goals set?

Sh1t isn't going to happen on its own, you have to go out there and make it happen. I know it is easier said then done but start off by figuring your passion in life and what makes you happy. Then start setting small goals toward that passion or happiness.

I am in the exact same position as you. Family is lower middle class, my family are immigrants in this country with no other family here to support us, I have no connections to the industries I want to get into because my family is not well connected.

However, I have managed to finish school on my own, get a job in the industry of my choice with other job offers waiting on me if this job doesn;t work out. Take some time off to focus on yourself and figure out what you really want in life. Once you have that mission statement then set goals on how to achieve it.

No company will be successful without a simple mission statement and neither will a human being. I suggest to go read a book called " An undefeated mind" by Alex Lickerman.

Always remember:

Nothing in life is given to you, you have to go out and get it
 

Johnny Alias

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Here's my two cents... Practical advice.

When I was your age I was FOOOKED. Truly. No money. Barely working car. Just screwed. Working some dead end jobs and I had a college degree I could have used for toiled paper...

You have three options and I'll outline the step process for them:

1) Travel. Look up a site called workaway.com. You can find jobs in foreign countries that COULD give you real life experience that is appealing to future employers. You've got to work man. Doesn't matter if its here or somewhere else.

2) Find a New Job - This time you've got to leverage any social connections you have for one that has upward mobility... but that only works if you stay the course at a company and advance through the ranks. NEVER quit a job with less than a two year stay. I know that you might have to bite bullets and fingers during this period but it looks horrible to employers. If you're having trouble getting a job, LIE on your resume and get a buddy to cover for you. I don't care if its unethical. If you know you can do the job and they won't let you in due to your lack of experience rig the system. You'd be surprised how many people have had to do this.

After being there for a two year minimum, if you're not getting the promotions or salary advances you require, get a new job with a higher base pay in the same field, BUT NEVER QUIT YOUR CURRENT JOB UNTIL THE NEW ONE IS READY TO GO! EVER! You need money and options. Don't depend on friends and family to bail you out. They will resent you and women will be majorly turned off.

3) Back to School - Not always great... you incur more debt and most employers would like practical experience over any degree. If you think this is your best option stick to Business/Accounting/IT whatever makes money. Sorry. If you want the fly house/car/trips/dinners with hotties you need cash. Loving what you do is a bonus in this world. While doing any one of these GET AN INTERNSHIP for the experience employers want.

Hope that helped. I have been there and pulled in a high six figures last year. You can do it, but you have to focus. Also stop partying if you are. It isn't going to get you your goals at all...
 

JaegerPilot217

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I feel you, I'm 26 and live with my parents, just working at a grocery store, no college degree just as High School Diploma
 

lover4721

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First - your mind is swelling with depression and worry.

You will fail at any mundane job, and wouldn't feel great.

Social support - you need that! Friends -- online/offline.
Exercise - 15 minutes is better than 2 hours with cardiac activity.

Exercise will help your mind function correctly.
Low social support is a risk factor of depression. So if you get more social friends, it is protective factor and you will feel greater.

Then you can go and find a job in which is well paying, and is something you want to do.
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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Johnny Alias said:
Here's my two cents... Practical advice.

When I was your age I was FOOOKED. Truly. No money. Barely working car. Just screwed. Working some dead end jobs and I had a college degree I could have used for toiled paper...

You have three options and I'll outline the step process for them:

1) Travel. Look up a site called workaway.com. You can find jobs in foreign countries that COULD give you real life experience that is appealing to future employers. You've got to work man. Doesn't matter if its here or somewhere else.

2) Find a New Job - This time you've got to leverage any social connections you have for one that has upward mobility... but that only works if you stay the course at a company and advance through the ranks. NEVER quit a job with less than a two year stay. I know that you might have to bite bullets and fingers during this period but it looks horrible to employers. If you're having trouble getting a job, LIE on your resume and get a buddy to cover for you. I don't care if its unethical. If you know you can do the job and they won't let you in due to your lack of experience rig the system. You'd be surprised how many people have had to do this.

After being there for a two year minimum, if you're not getting the promotions or salary advances you require, get a new job with a higher base pay in the same field, BUT NEVER QUIT YOUR CURRENT JOB UNTIL THE NEW ONE IS READY TO GO! EVER! You need money and options. Don't depend on friends and family to bail you out. They will resent you and women will be majorly turned off.

3) Back to School - Not always great... you incur more debt and most employers would like practical experience over any degree. If you think this is your best option stick to Business/Accounting/IT whatever makes money. Sorry. If you want the fly house/car/trips/dinners with hotties you need cash. Loving what you do is a bonus in this world. While doing any one of these GET AN INTERNSHIP for the experience employers want.

Hope that helped. I have been there and pulled in a high six figures last year. You can do it, but you have to focus. Also stop partying if you are. It isn't going to get you your goals at all...
Hey Johnny, thanks for sharing that workaway website , its a really cool idea. Might even consider it myself.

Especially if you are in the situation as the OP , going on one of these workaway trips would be ideal. Travelling builds so much life experience, and wisdom.
 

Frogster

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If I had it to do over, I would consider starting my own business.

At 24 with no wife or kids, you can make a go of it without having the overhead of a family. If you FAIL, you are just starting your life, so its "easy" to recover.

Once you get hitched, and have a career, you long to become an entrepreneur, but the risk to your lifestyle is tremendous. So few people have the balls to leave a full time job and start a fledgling business.

Hope this helps.
 

RedScorpion

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dmvdav said:
I am 24 years old, and decided tonight was my last night at my job. I keep getting less hours because my managers don't fire people, just give them one or two hours a week and increase workload so they eventually quit. I am broke, and have bills to pay, but at least I live with my parents so I don't have to worry about being evicted.

I come from a low-middle class family, lead by my mother, while my dad sat silently watching the Lifetime channel. Being taught to "follow my dreams" I went to art school and got a degree in film. I'm sure many posters here know how absolutely useless that degree is. I learned it the hard way.

I've always been able to get along with all types of people, but my introverted personality kills me in the workplace because I can't play the politics game. I don't have many social connections, or family which makes it hard to find work. All I want is personal freedom, and stability and I know SoSuave is full of people who understand the challenges men face in modern society. My family has nothing, and I will inherit nothing. I have nothing to lose, except my car, and without my car I have nothing.

What should I do? With nothing to lose, I have freedom to do anything, but I'm tied down by debts. All I want is freedom. What should I do?
I'm going to recommend a slightly different route, than probably what is expected and advised. Of course depending on which country you're from, I would advise joining the military as whatever you would like. Many people think of the military as infantry, shooting, living in the field, etc. - but that is more reserved for basic training and combat arms trades. There are many different fields that cover a wide range of tasks and responsibilities. Clerk, Supply, Fix planes/ships/vehicles, electronics, you name it.

I will not say it is exactly easy, or always fun - there are times where you have to push yourself and go through hardship. But for the most part, after the initial training, you basically live similarly as in civilian life. 9 to 5 (or rather, 7-3) work hours, 5 days a week. Sometimes shift work.

The main reason is you can fulfill all your needs at once from it, potentially. You make friends as you go, you get your schooling as you learn your job and courses. You'll have random friends all over the country. Your confidence increases as you overcome challenges that most would balk at. Money can be good (depending on which country). You do and experience many things. And you can go officer with your degree.

I can't guarantee that it'll be a great thing, I've certainly have had ups and downs with it. But I don't regret it. Probably the best thing I did. But do your homework and research too about it, if you do think about it.
 

Frogster

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I joined the Army in 1988, and did my time.

Given today's geopolitical environment, I would never recommend to my son that he should join the military.

The lunatics are running the assylum.
 

_sideways_

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I'm working per diem...or on call basis. I never know when I will get a fulls week of work. All I have is credit card bills and a car I can't afford to drive because I'm struggling to pay rent to my parents.

Now they want me to move out...I guess it's true that resentment sets in sooner.

OP u need to start making money....and keep looking for full time work.

Your negative mind at the moment saying u have nothing is partly true. You have nothing yet...but if u keep dog pedaling. ..eventually your swimming.

If my mom wants me out...fine..have it her way. If I lose my car...fine...but that's not going to stop me from at least applying for jobs. And I take at least 5 minutes to laugh each day because you have to keep ur spirits up now.

You're not alone. And remember. ..A good man can re start his life multiple times and he just gets cooler.
This is probably the 3rd time I'm starting over financially. ..but I have a wealth of experience and stories to keep good friends and girls always calling on me to see what I've been up to.
 

skinnyguy

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Look, I lost everything when I was 27. I lost my apartment, my job, and went through suicidal depression. I was hospitalized. But guess what? I bounced back.

You can do it my friend. Things happen for a reason, and there is a reason you're stuck in this place now.

At that time, I thought my life was over. But something kept me alive and now I have a much better life. You have to be willing to try different things, and look deep into your soul to figure out what you're good at. I went on to get my Master's in the field that I have a passion for, and now I have a good job.

I agree with the guy who said you should be a bartender - you gain good life skills through doing this. But make sure you keep your eye on a bigger goal.

I disagree with the person who said you should start a business. Now is not the right time. Unless it's something that doesn't require a bank loan you'll have to pay back. Defaulting on a loan will hurt you for several years.
 
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