What Is Wrong With This Site.

Grey Fox

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This site does not serve to make men better it merely makes their situation first. Though may here say that the purpose of this site is to happy with one's self first and then attract later. The whole reason why you are here is for one reason: Her.

Maybe she was the girl of your dreams you never got, maybe she turned you down, maybe she is this ideal woman you have not found. The problem is you think you can play games and you think you can have control over women by what you do, say and how you think. I hate to tell you that the rules of the dating game have been written by women and that you are merely being played and not a player. They expect crap like this and sucker you into it because they just want more attention, more drama and to have worn you down so hard from chasing them that you roll over on your back and give into their wishes. You are so out of breath chasing down every techinquie, line and mastering every idea you are to out of breath to say next.

Your confidence is fake, you base it off wheither or not you can seduce a woman. Because ultimately all the things you do are in some way focused on making yourself more appealing to women, so much so that you give up on being you. When you have ten numbers stuffed in your wallet you feel like a king, when you don't you feel like a fool. You belive that if you do A, B and C you will end up with result D, and act things out like a script. You become less real with every time you play games, and you give up on being a man. You turn yourself into a modern ken doll taking on the current style, slang and hobbies that you think she wants to see. And yes ken has no d1ck either and in the end she probably doesn't want to see yours either.

So you come here to be told how to act and what to be like instead of being your self and telling women what you want from them. You come here and have "experts" peddle and hawk their wares at you and prey upon those dark unspoken insecurities, the fears of being alone, the fear of never having sex again, and the fear of not measuring up to the standard of being "male" that is controled by society and the media the pushes towards feminity in males. In the end you march to the same drum beat, you just fill a different role that you are still expected to fill. And yes some of you will have success but what is that success? Is it to be accept by a woman, to have her love and attention by pretending to be someone you are not to get her attention, to spend your hard earned money on gifts and dates for her. You get so worked up about having a woman that you forget about having your respect and pride come first.

-Grey Fox
 

naes

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strange how someone still doesnt understand the website after three years as a member and over 500 posts
 

reyalp

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http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=95632

we were just talking about this, do a search.

and if you're really wanting to convince people that the focus of this site is wrong, don't come into it discouraging the wrong behavior. encourage the proper behavior instead.

i view this site much like a book i own: Joe Weider's Ultimate Bodybuilding.

why do i have this book?
i got it when i was lifting weights.
it helped me realize what i was doing right, and why it worked.
it helped me realize what i was doing wrong, and why it failed.
it helped me find exercises to hit specific areas of muscle. for instance, the outside tricep i had problems developing.

same with SS.net
 

everywomanshero

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My take

Grey Fox I actually agree with some of what you said, and if all men behaved this way it would be damn cool. Unfortunately, we live in a world where:

A) The courts are staunchly anti-male. They exist solely to give your money to women through maintenance and child support. My friend has custody of the kids 45% of the time, yet pays almost third of his salary in child support, had to split his 401k, makes her truck payment, gave her the house, and things got so bad he had to quit his job and start working under the table.

B) As bad as I hate to admit it, 75% of women can attract a male partner 300x easier than 75% of guys. 25% of guys have it easy, and 25% of women are totally screwed. Guys *have* to increase their reproductive opportunities to avoid seeming too desperate.... It's true that if we ALL quit putting up with this nonsense it would change. The problem is there is no way to get enough people to change to make any difference except inside a very small social circle as part of a prearanged plan.

C) IMmigration brings in more men than women. This makes things worse, as men die off we continue to get increased competition through immigration. We need a lot more mail order brides and nurses :)

Women are only as *****y as their options allow them to be. If the courts would be fair and immigration swung chiefly towards female workers, then you'd see a whole lot of grey foxes really fast. Women's dating forums would have 100,000 members, and guys wouldn't bother to post.

Unfortunately, that's not the reality. The only way to increase your options is A) numbers and B) competence.

Now, as more men approach thousands of women each things will get worse. Women will have ever more options with more players gaining competence, dressing up, and spending more and more time and energy devoted to women. As the courts continously levy huge fines against the man regardless of fault, women will have less fear of ditching him for greener pastures.. word is out!

For a man, it's boiling down to:

1) Have a cool job or a powerful position.
2) NEVER, EVER AGREE TO MARIAGE nless yer state fully recognizes prenups. Even then it's a very bad idea.
3) DOn't waste money on espensive dates for no good reason. Make sure if you do this there is a good reason. I'd rather go into isolation or do something cheap & fun, anyway.
4) Build the best possible social circle
5) Be a cool, interesting guy.
6) Online dating is something you can experiment with, but don't spend too much time on it or expect results. Sometimes it works awesome, then suddently dries up. That's normal.
7) Do not place any expectations on women, because they are flakey due to having too many options. You really aren't important to her until she's invested alot in you. There is another ten losers around every corner she can pick from. YOu can't NEXT someone who isn't even interested in you. Get over it.
8) Most phone numbers will proably not amount to lays unless you *really* have a lot of time on your hands. I prefer the numbers game.
9) Stop thinking about "what's right". When she leaves your sorry butt do you really think she's going to be worried about what is right for you?
10) Understand that women can get away with damn near anything right now. Your only defense will be the number of options you have. If you have no other options, then you have no recourse. Sooner or later, she will call your bluff.


If you really, and I do mean really, did the things above you would have options. It's not needed to approach thousands of women, although I do this and recommend it to anyone socialable.

The good news is I think more men are becomming aware of the dangers of marriage and child support, although religious kooks are working hard to keep guys feeling guilty, and liberals working hard to keep the modern day hoe emplyed with child support money. I very often see mail order brides while shopping. Older men are increasingly turning to overseas brides, this increases the number of women competing for available men. White guys are finally starting to see the opportunities available with black women which decreases the needy male supply, and finally I sometimes run into "donation takers" when sarging that provide really desperate losers with a quick lay that's alot cheaper than child support or maintenance... this also helps reduce the number of overly needy guys who will do anything to get a woman.
 

DJHoolahoop

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Actually this site is great at getting one to become familiar with the opposite sex and the mechanics of how things work. I will agree that it doesn't make you necessarily into the person you may want to be, but it definitely helps you to figure out who that is.

I still struggle with conversation and with keeping a girl interested in me long enough to keep going, but I don't think that has to do with this site.

I had an interesting dream the other day. It starred yours truly and had groups of people. People you'd normally see anywhere. Now the peculiar thing I think about is how my brain can have these groups interact almost perfectly to how it is when I go out in public and yet I still don't interact in the same way. Obviously somewhere deep down my brain "gets it", but somehow I don't. So it's simply a matter of doing what I know I should do, but that I don't do. Like many others, the only true way to "get it" is to do it.
 

Morphiex

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Oh MY FRIKKIN GOD !!!!

for the last time if people use this site to define who they are they have totally misinterpreted the actual Idea of this site....

The hole idea was to make the males who act all needy geeky and put women on pedastals understand that women arent a special fairytale creature that you have to kiss ass to , give gifts or always do what they tell you, to get them.

This site opened my eyes , because i was one of those guys , i was the friend and i always got my heart broken , but after i read the dj bible , it changed my VIEW on girls and dating and flirting. I understood what i did wrong , i understood where i went wrong , i understood how many times girls actually where trying to flirt with me but i was totaly oblivious....
This site didnt define who i am , and what il become , it just made me understand how girls act and what most of them want....

If people use this site to define themselfs , then its totally wrong , your supposed to take what u learn from here and incorporate it to the way you live your life , the way u want to live your life....
If it doesnt fit with your way of life ,then dont do it....

peace
 

\O/

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Originally posted by Morphiex
Oh MY FRIKKIN GOD !!!!

for the last time if people use this site to define who they are they have totally misinterpreted the actual Idea of this site....

The hole idea was to make the males who act all needy geeky and put women on pedastals understand that women arent a special fairytale creature that you have to kiss ass to , give gifts or always do what they tell you, to get them.

This site opened my eyes , because i was one of those guys , i was the friend and i always got my heart broken , but after i read the dj bible , it changed my VIEW on girls and dating and flirting. I understood what i did wrong , i understood where i went wrong , i understood how many times girls actually where trying to flirt with me but i was totaly oblivious....
This site didnt define who i am , and what il become , it just made me understand how girls act and what most of them want....

If people use this site to define themselfs , then its totally wrong , your supposed to take what u learn from here and incorporate it to the way you live your life , the way u want to live your life....
If it doesnt fit with your way of life ,then dont do it....

peace
Listen to this man!! Don't make this site into being more than it actually is. It's here to help us improve, get girls and understand what used to be totally oblivious to us. You are who you are. Only you can change yourself. Not some site on the web. Although it can help!
 

Tomatoes

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Personally this site has helped me. It has given me a difrent way of thinking. I can now apply more logic to a situation involing a girl and therefore not get half as emotional. This in turn has given me better results. I intend to keep coming here to learn more and to pass on what i have learnt. This site is not harming anyone and its certainly not a waste of time.
 
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Lol... here we go again. Put aside your ego, figure out what 'you' want in 'your' life not including a woman, and follow your dreams. When you've created your dreams make up new ones. Who the hell wants anyone who has no ambition, except for you? I know I don't. I thank god everyday that I'm not with my last GF. She had no ambition except for us.

The stuff on this site are tools for changing your out look on life, everyone just so happens to be way too focused on getting a girl. (Plus it's V-day and maybe their alone.) Most of the great DJ's were posters of a few years ago. I noticed that there doesn't seem to be anyone posting new idea or reiterating old ones. Just posers who think they 'get it' who should read the bible again.

Grey Fox, you have some great stuff on this site. I'm sorry you feel this way, but your right.

This sums it all up.

you forget about having your respect and pride come first.
 

El MonoLoco

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I think of this site as the ultimate male version of Cosmo....

I take everything with a grain of salt.Only incorporating that which I feel works for me and my style.

There is nothing wrong with self improvement. That is what this place is striving for. Every should have read the bible by now......What is the first thing we learned?.........Improve yourself first.....then get the girls(as that is the goal for the site)

You have to focus on yourself and your life first before you can expand your improvement to other areas of your life.

Grey Fox you have taken this site way to literally by assuming that people will only focus on one part of their life ( getting girls).

Some will.....but they haven't got it either.

Most of us understand that true change can only happen from within first. Sure most of us found this place because of a girl or lack of girls but we found that those troubles weren't the only problems in our lives.......we weren't seeing the bigger picture. Many of our girl problems stemmed from other things, our physique, our attitude on life, our financial situation, our inexperience, etc.....

So we work to improve ourselves as a whole and not just spot checking the problem that drove us here in the first place.
 

ethnomethodologist

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Originally posted by El MonoLoco
I think of this site as the ultimate male version of Cosmo....
As always, I only come to this site for ideas and practice.

I thought about that at 4 O'Clock this morning as I lay in bed with my mind running. I think it actually came through around 2:47 or something when I was thinking of different books to build interpersonal skills off of. Walk by a bunch of girls reading a cosmo, and than turn to em and say,

"IS THIS TRUE?!?!?!"

Yeah, well as everybody has already said time and again and again and again. This site is more than just about women.

Only reason I got entranced with this site is because it digs deeper and more socially into the depths of the human mind. There are thousands of different totally unique people on this board. Their knowledge is being combined in a cesspool of possibilities. Everything that has been said has been scrutinized by at least one person who's mind absorbed the material and spit it back out in the form of learning about a 'new' problem.

This site drags the basics of human emotional and mental troubles to the surface for the remainder to examine. The fact that this has not happened to males before is amazing.

When in history was there a forum for males to come and spill their problems outside of AA?

P.S. I have attended AA meetings and the guys are just like us, spilling their problems. THe problem is the lessons of the groups are never written down concisely. The information given is on a case for case basis, there is no real discussion, there it boils down to yes or no. The worst possible learning scenario.
 

Tha Realnezz

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Well sooner or later it will turn into more than just attracting women for every poster.The emphasis on self-improvement triggers alot of confidence,slowly building into ambition.

Thus,naturally posters here get "beyond" attracting women...usually taking the DJ self-improvement work ethic it to the gym and there proffesional careers.

Now it starts off as "How can I make myself into the ultimate stud" and develops into "I am going to best that I can be at anything I try".

^I don't see how that can be a bad thing besides threads that have nothing to do with women,being on the mainboard.Now you mentioned also how guys shouldn't be trying to turn themselves into what women want.

My question is how else to get women?

Women choose men not the other way around.

This isn't the stone age my freind.We can't walk up to women and insert our fluids in them and walk away.

They have the vaginas and if they feel like shutting there legs ..for whatever reason.. then you're s.o.l.

That's something you need to accept and realize.

The only way to balance things out is becoming a worthwhile mate to women and then you have what THEY want..you see?

What we're doing here is flipping the script on women.Becoming high-status males to ensure women do what we want after courtship has ended.

What you are saying about women running the show is absolutley correct.It's been like that for awhile now and won't change ever again.That's something certain people here need to accept.

Accept it and start working on becoming a better mate.
 

El MonoLoco

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Ethno are you agreeing with me or no?



I know I take the things I learn here way beyond just trying to score with as many girls as possible.....I think we all should....



:rockon:
 

ethnomethodologist

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Originally posted by El MonoLoco
Ethno are you agreeing with me or no?
I agree with you, to a great deal. I made a thread teasing guys on this site for analyzing everything about eachother.

We take things beyond trying to pick up women. Thing is though, today's society has a language, that is the language I want to learn. I want to be able to describe what I have learned on this site to my friends and family.

I have learned so much from you guys. So these days I am running as much as possible through my system. I know so many people who have the same problems as you guys, but the process of finding what it is about people that they want to change is hard.
 

treefingers

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Re: My take

Originally posted by everywomanshero
Grey Fox I actually agree with some of what you said, and if all men behaved this way it would be damn cool. Unfortunately, we live in a world where:

A) The courts are staunchly anti-male. They exist solely to give your money to women through maintenance and child support. My friend has custody of the kids 45% of the time, yet pays almost third of his salary in child support, had to split his 401k, makes her truck payment, gave her the house, and things got so bad he had to quit his job and start working under the table.

B) As bad as I hate to admit it, 75% of women can attract a male partner 300x easier than 75% of guys. 25% of guys have it easy, and 25% of women are totally screwed. Guys *have* to increase their reproductive opportunities to avoid seeming too desperate.... It's true that if we ALL quit putting up with this nonsense it would change. The problem is there is no way to get enough people to change to make any difference except inside a very small social circle as part of a prearanged plan.

C) IMmigration brings in more men than women. This makes things worse, as men die off we continue to get increased competition through immigration. We need a lot more mail order brides and nurses :)

Women are only as *****y as their options allow them to be. If the courts would be fair and immigration swung chiefly towards female workers, then you'd see a whole lot of grey foxes really fast. Women's dating forums would have 100,000 members, and guys wouldn't bother to post.

Unfortunately, that's not the reality. The only way to increase your options is A) numbers and B) competence.

Now, as more men approach thousands of women each things will get worse. Women will have ever more options with more players gaining competence, dressing up, and spending more and more time and energy devoted to women. As the courts continously levy huge fines against the man regardless of fault, women will have less fear of ditching him for greener pastures.. word is out!

For a man, it's boiling down to:

1) Have a cool job or a powerful position.
2) NEVER, EVER AGREE TO MARIAGE nless yer state fully recognizes prenups. Even then it's a very bad idea.
3) DOn't waste money on espensive dates for no good reason. Make sure if you do this there is a good reason. I'd rather go into isolation or do something cheap & fun, anyway.
4) Build the best possible social circle
5) Be a cool, interesting guy.
6) Online dating is something you can experiment with, but don't spend too much time on it or expect results. Sometimes it works awesome, then suddently dries up. That's normal.
7) Do not place any expectations on women, because they are flakey due to having too many options. You really aren't important to her until she's invested alot in you. There is another ten losers around every corner she can pick from. YOu can't NEXT someone who isn't even interested in you. Get over it.
8) Most phone numbers will proably not amount to lays unless you *really* have a lot of time on your hands. I prefer the numbers game.
9) Stop thinking about "what's right". When she leaves your sorry butt do you really think she's going to be worried about what is right for you?
10) Understand that women can get away with damn near anything right now. Your only defense will be the number of options you have. If you have no other options, then you have no recourse. Sooner or later, she will call your bluff.


If you really, and I do mean really, did the things above you would have options. It's not needed to approach thousands of women, although I do this and recommend it to anyone socialable.

The good news is I think more men are becomming aware of the dangers of marriage and child support, although religious kooks are working hard to keep guys feeling guilty, and liberals working hard to keep the modern day hoe emplyed with child support money. I very often see mail order brides while shopping. Older men are increasingly turning to overseas brides, this increases the number of women competing for available men. White guys are finally starting to see the opportunities available with black women which decreases the needy male supply, and finally I sometimes run into "donation takers" when sarging that provide really desperate losers with a quick lay that's alot cheaper than child support or maintenance... this also helps reduce the number of overly needy guys who will do anything to get a woman.



HHHHHMMMMM I know what you are saying but if you look at the raw numbers you'll see that the US sex ratio is 1/1 male to female(this is from the cia world factbook) where as in most of europe and japan it's about 104 males for every 100 females. So it would seem european women would be even more *****y because they have even more choices yet on the contrary they seem less *****y than US gals.
 

A-Unit

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Re:

The only thing wrong with anything is the fact it just doesn't fit your reality (beliefs, values, ideas, expectations, etc), but it MAY fit the other 5,999,999,999 people on the planet, making it OK.

-I don't agree with all the posts, and some might be children, disinformation spreaders, or trolls, but all in all, the site SERVES its purpose.

-There are those who talk about the 'heyday' of SS.com, as if it was some glorious time. Of course it was! All new ventures, per the ego, are wonderful times, because they're NEW. That doesn't mean better, even though it was a temporary change, it just means NEW. To say it isn't like it was is to be naive, because you can't measure the SHORT_RUN productivity of such systems.

~What you garner from such sites are the following...

+Problems are VERY apparent in the dating world, both for men AND women.

+That MOST guys don't want change, they want the world to change.

+That guys want to bytch, but do nothing about it.

+That some guys are just juvenile and use sites like this to have fun.

Isn't the WHOLE world just like this? Libraries have ALL the info you COULD possibly need to become like the top 1%, are FREE, and yet, people STILL search like HUNTERs with a hunger pains, for the holy grail of LIFE.

Get a Grip.



A-Unit
 

JHeights83rd

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I don’t see where youre going with this. I agree that the media stresses a standard of femininity a little but

They expect crap like this and sucker you into it because they just want more attention, more drama and to have worn you down so hard from chasing them that you roll over on your back and give into their wishes.
Some Drama and playing games makes it interesting. What are you going to keep talking about, day after day when you see her. How your day went, ok that’s nice, but it gets boring and you will get predictable. Girls run their tests on guys not to be a ***** but because they want to see how far you’ll go. They want to see how you handle situations, whether you handle it like a ****h or a mack.

prey upon those dark unspoken insecurities, the fears of being alone, the fear of never having sex again, and the fear of not measuring up to the standard of being "male" that is controled by society

on the women have options thing, this is because women can go up in age, far. 20 year olds have 30s, even 40s men trying to talk to them.

yo if u know your game is such that you cannot get azz from a female to save your life, you will feel like less man compared to your friends who get lucky sometimes. If you go out and pay for sexual gratification, you will feel like you are throwing in the towel on yourself, admitting that you have no game at all. And you will feel like less of a man, even if you try to talk yourself out of it.

The rules of the dating game have been written by a woman.
Women cannot choose what they emotionally respond to. Think about abusive boyfriends, she has an emotional attachment to him she cant just leave. Ofcourse if you ask a woman shell say she doesn’t care about game. But if your game is on point enough, and shes emotionally attached, you can tell her what you want from her.
You can change your behavior. Not just with women but in other stuff too. Many of us were conditioned to the wrong behavior, that’s being yourself will get you nowhere until you become sure of yourself with women.
 

84karat

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This site is a resource. Like any other resource, you can either use it, or choose not to.

I think only a select few here are actually congruent with what they claim online. If anything, this site made women a higher priority in my life. Sure, I made efforts to get more women, and I did at the time. But is that really what matters? Not really. I have a real life now. Balanced, healthy, passionate about what I'm doing...and I'm loving it. I see a woman by herself or a few sitting together, I no longer constantly think about approaching them. Sure, I could, and I could do it so effortlessly...the last time I asked for a number and got rejected was over 3 months ago. I don't get rejected not because I'm not trying, but because women are not my life. I have a life. If women enter it, then fine, I'll take the opportunity. But I don't go looking for them.

I think once you get very goal-oriented, you begin viewing the whole world in terms of your goals. Every single detail, action, whatever...it either moves you one step closer to your goal, or one step farther from it. I've naturally become more selective in the types of women I associate with. I'm not just going to throw myself at a girl because she's hot. I'm not saying that doesn't work...but what do you really want? Sex? If that's your life goal, I don't even care to pity you.

I think I've finally crossed over from boyhood and become a real man for once. I want a quality of life, not just sex and late nights and the drama that comes with it. I don't go to club/bars or drink anymore. Sure, it cuts out a large number of potential girls/opportunities, but I don't care to associate with those girls or that lifestyle anyway.

I think what guys on here need is self-respect. I have it now. I actually feel terrible when I do something that is not valuing my time. Like writing this post for example. Of course, I have fun, etc...but when you value yourself over others and hold your goals highly...you look at life differently.

Basically, it's tough to explain, but you realize all this after you're at that next level. Believe me, just do it. Don't think about it, overanalyze, just make some goals...replace your bad habits with good ones...

Learn some time-management...I doubt that even 80% of people practice good time-management. How many people do you know that can get 8-9hrs of sleep a night? Start doing these things, get your life in order, live a healthy, balanced life...and things will just fall into place...

goodluck
 

I_Only_Live_Once

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Grey Fox, you're totally right, but don't expect people on sosuave to get it. They would rather hear trendy things like how to pick up girls on myspace or some post on theoretically placing your mindset on something.
 
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