What does she mean?

[BigFoot]

Unfortunately, I think I'm at the end of a relationship I've had for some time. But she said something yesterday that I don't understand: I'm not "adventuresome" enough? It's possible she used the wrong word here, but any idea what she means?

 

[Fatality]

maybe boring?

 

[BigFoot]

That could be it. I'm not that boring I think, but possibly in the things we do together .... Wouldn't she just say 'boring' then though?

 

[BigFoot]

Here's another clue I just remembered. She didn't like the fact that I looked at the menu of a restaurant before we went in.
Somehow this is all significant to her.

 

[Disconnect]

It means she thinks you dont wanna try new things. As in, your relationship had fallen into its own pattern. Variety is key here.

EDIT: What the hell? What if you don't know what kind of food they have?

 

[BigFoot]

Disconnect, that's it I bet !

 

[MacDiddy]

Bigfoot:

It means nothing..... Its as meaningful as

"No its not you its me!!!"
"I need some space"
"I need to find myself"
"you deserve better"

Don't be a clown by trying to be "More" adventursome or correcting whatever she says you lack...

You are just an AFC and fortunately for you...that is curable....

 

[PRMoon]

Originally posted by Disconnect
It means she thinks you dont wanna try new things. As in, your relationship had fallen into its own pattern. Variety is key here.

EDIT: What the hell? What if you don't know what kind of food they have?

I'm inclined to agree with this...yes, even the part I really don't understand.

 

[Wyldfire]

She feels like you're stuck in a rut and that she's stuck in it with you. Start doing things out of character for you once in awhile that will surprise her. I'm not talking gifts or that kind of thing. The next time you go out to eat, go to an ethnic restaurant that serves food you've never tried before. Don't look at the menu ahead of time and just try something off the menu you've never even heard of before. Things like that. And if you always do the same song and dance sexually, then think up something new to do...anything from a simple can of whipped cream to finding a tarzan costume and come into the
livingroom beating your chest and doing a Tarzan yell, scooping her up and carrying her off to the bedroom. Just mix things up a bit...

 

[MacDiddy]

Bigfoot wrote:
Disconnect, that's it I bet !

Oh mercy me!!!

Is your intention to win her back?

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by MacDiddy
Oh mercy me!!!

Is your intention to win her back?

They aren't broken up. She just basically is trying to tell him that he's too predictable. He just needs to mix things up a bit and things will be fine.

 

[belividere]

I think I'm at the end of a relationship I've had for some time.

I think the key word was END.

It means nothing..... Its as meaningful as

"No its not you its me!!!"
"I need some space"
"I need to find myself"
"you deserve better"

Don't be a clown by trying to be "More" adventursome or correcting whatever she says you lack...

Seriously this is great advice. This girl is thinking that she knows what she wants and really doesn't. She will leave you to chase what she thinks she wants and then fall on her face, many times, before realizing that your boring self is better than what she can find.

If you really are happy with the person that you are right now than the worst thing that you can do is to try and change. Accept yourself and realize what you want or dont want. If she is not going to fit in to your plan then you are best to just walk away realizing that. Putting on an outfit for a night or eating something that you know you dont like is going to get you no where fast. Best to fess up to what you are and what you expect because if it isn't her than I am sure you will have a better chance meeting someone compatible when you are single again.

 

[Paradox]

She wants her hair pulled while he spanks her. Right Wyld?

Originally posted by Wyldfire
They aren't broken up. She just basically is trying to tell him that he's too predictable. He just needs to mix things up a bit and things will be fine.

I have to agree with Wyld here. This is the solution.

 

[BigFoot]

Guys, I'm truly amazed at the insight you have displayed. We're not broken up yet, but the warnings are there.
Wyldfire really hit the nail on the head with his practical advice ! This quote here could have come from her:

go to an ethnic restaurant that serves food you've never tried before. Don't look at the menu ahead of time and just

She had complained in the past that I just like American food.
And

This girl is thinking that she knows what she wants and really doesn't. She will leave you to chase what she thinks she wants and then fall on her face, many times, before realizing that your boring self is better than what she can find.

from Belividere is so right on I'm stunned. She IS confused (and has said so), actually did go out with another guy briefly and came running back to me. I think she may try this again , which is what I'd like to avoid.

 

[Royal Elite]

Originally posted by BigFoot

And from Belividere is so right on I'm stunned. She is confused, actually did go out with another guy briefly and came running back to me. I think she may try this again , which is what I'd like to avoid.

If a chick ever tried this to me, I wouldn't waste my time twice. Im not a bus that a chick can get off of and back on whenever she feels like it.

 

[BigFoot]

She wants her hair pulled while he spanks her. Right Wyld?

This might not be so far-fetched as it sounds.

 

[topher]

Originally posted by Disconnect
It means she thinks you dont wanna try new things. As in, your relationship had fallen into its own pattern. Variety is key here.

EDIT: What the hell? What if you don't know what kind of food they have?

I usually like to look at a menu before eating at a restaurant due to my food allergies, i do like to try new things so long as theyre lacking certain ingredients. is that some sort of turnoff for women too? i mean its not cause im closed minded, its cause i don't want to be in agony for 2 days.

I keep picturing myself like ben stiller in along came polly when hes eating at that restuarant.

 

[MacDiddy]

I'm really surprised by the quality of feedback on this thread... It sucks...

Bigfoot's problem is that his gf does not view him as a long term prospect anymore... She wants to find someone else and just string him along for companionship till she does.. while using such excuses as
"I'm confused" or
"your not adventursome"
to mask her her current behaviour...

You've allowed her to jump the fence and comeback home... she knows how to do it now and she'll wait till the grass is greener on the other side before she goes again and she won't be coming back...

No amount of change in you is going to do it... She'll just see you as trying too hard!! Your suplicating and being AFC.. thats unattractive... If I was you, I'd be less concerned about her and start making plans for yourself... Start seeing other woman... and give her the "I'm confused" line too.... Start creating value in her eyes by being more or a man... in charge of his life... by being someone she looks up to.

Many moons ago, as one of my relationships was almost at an end, my gf told me I was too h0rny... As a desperate AFC, I tried anything to hold on to her and that included being less sexual... seriously.... how stupid was that!!!!
She told me she was confused as a pretext to start seeing someone else...

Anyway... your now acting like a wife who needs to go buy lingerie to impress her man.... This supplicative behaviour only works on a man... not a woman...

 

[S0LID]

How long was you with her for mate?

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

It means you haven't been doing enough to keep her interest level up. That's all you need to know.