weird problem

[boghi13]

hello !
I`m new on this forum and I`m posting about a problem I have encountered recently.
I`m 29 and my GF is 25 , we are together for 3 years and we sort of gotten to the talking about marriage. This was so slow since i have a lone mother I`m sort of taking care of.. so me and my GF still don`t leave together, we were about to change that , get a place of our own when the following event occurred.

She lives with her sister and for a couple of days some male friend came into town and they offered him lodging. after the friend was gone back to his place.. she came and told me that he made some sexual propositions to her and she accepted , nothing to heavy she pretends "just kissing and petting" on the spot I was inclined to forgive her even though she didn`t agree to may request to cut of all connections to the said male friend, so I did forgive her.. we even had make-up sex.

Afterwards knowing that she continues to chat with him i sort of sneak out and read their conversation, both leading to the events and the conversations after he went back to his place, they were pretty heavy in sexual, but i did sort of gotten the impression that she was telling the truth only kissing and petting although some foreplay was involved. She did kept telling him that it was over the adventure and she wanted to stay with me. So without telling her I knew the content I confronted her again and asked for the full story without the sugar coating.

She agreed and told me that since I`m her first serious relation she kinda regrets not having more previous experience and with other males and she just conducted an experiment to see how it is without thinking to much about consequences.
She even agreed to let me read the messages I`ve already read. We talked a lot and we concluded that our relation is stronger than this and she just ..sort of went and had herself the equivalent of a "prostitute" in terms of emotional involvement with the guy. The thing that bothers me the most is that even when i asked her again to stop communicating with the man ..she refused.

I figure I should stay true and not show jealousy, and try to prove myself worthy, both by impressing her and not falling into a work - sleep routine and by taking some time for myself.
What is your assessment of the whole situation and any advice about how to proceed.

Thank you and sorry for the long post. Also sorry for the poor language, English is not my native language.

 

[Die Hard]

Man, she totally disrespected you. Besides, I can tell that this girl has HUGE psychological problems, which makes it impossible to have a worthy relationship with her.

THROW HER IN THE TRASHCAN, YOU DESERVE BETTER!!

 

[BeDJ]

Detach from her emotionally.
Use her for sex until as you find other options.

You're relationship is not stronger than this. She already check out of it. She wants to see how far she can get away with and your reactions. Currently, she is looking for an upgrade and you are disposable.

The truth hurts, but not as much as imminent betrayal.

 

[Bokanovsky]

She lives with her sister and for a couple of days some male friend came into town and they offered him lodging. after the friend was gone back to his place.. she came and told me that he made some sexual propositions to her and she accepted , nothing to heavy she pretends "just kissing and petting" on the spot I was inclined to forgive her even though she didn`t agree to may request to cut of all connections to the said male friend, so I did forgive her.. we even had make-up sex.

I stopped reading after this. No self-respecting man would have reacted this way. I sincerely hope the OP is a troll.

 

[visions]

she definitely disrespected you, and still does by continuing to talk to him.
she needs to be put in her place.
i doubt she's worthy of a serious relationship.

some ideas:
1) toss her aside and seek a higher quality female for a long-term relationship
2) keep her around just for sex, but with less of an investment in her while continuing to do 1)

 

[Colossus]

She agreed and told me that since I`m her first serious relation she kinda regrets not having more previous experience and with other males and she just conducted an experiment to see how it is without thinking to much about consequences.

Man you got dissed big time. But the quote above says it all---let this be a lesson to her. The CONSEQUENCE of her actions is you unceremoniously dumping her without discussion. Also providing a valuable lesson in manhood for you.

 

[Alvafe]

I agree, she wanted to do the test? now she get the conseguences, dump the dumb hore, and find a better woman, if she was really into you she wouldn't risk that also take note, only reason she teold you was to let her not feel bad, and well since you know already she are still talking to that guy she will do that again with another if not doing it already

but really don't matter you should have kicked her just for kissing someone

 

[the_untold_history]

get your emotions out of this relationship. make it strictly a sexual relationship for as long as it lasts. you should be open to seeing other women. If she is curious about other guys, that incident did not satisfy her male curiosity. given that she is 25 that's a strange excuse anyway. women start when they are 18 or younger nowadays.

 

[Valentino14]

What a fool. You mean you still want to stay with a chick screwing another guy?

 

[Slickster]

Boghi13

The relationship is over already.

She will do this again.

The sooner you break up with her the better.

Find a woman that respects you.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Bhogi,
Be positive,don't see this as losing your leading Lady,but more a case of gaining a Plate.....No one has raised the possibility that she could be playing a silly game,hoping your jealousy will firm up the deal on moving in...Either way,this relationship is on ice,just enjoy the good bits.

 

[Threepersons]

Use her for sex until as you find other options.

keep her around just for sex, but with less of an investment in her while continuing to do 1)

get your emotions out of this relationship. make it strictly a sexual relationship for as long as it lasts.

Be positive,don't see this as losing your leading Lady,but more a case of gaining a Plate.

I really hate how some people think this way. Is a person really that desperate for sex? Where are your fibers as a man? He needs to leave her now. Sticking around for sexual favors while your woman is riding the c0ck of another man is the most pathetic thing a guy can do. You should never accept this as being okay.

 

[BeDJ]

I really hate how some people think this way. Is a person really that desperate for sex? Where are your fibers as a man? He needs to leave her now. Sticking around for sexual favors while your woman is riding the c0ck of another man is the most pathetic thing a guy can do. You should never accept this as being okay.

Holier than thou much?

Thanks for quoting me and leaving out the most important part -

Detach from her emotionally.
Use her for sex until as you find other options.

It's alright if you haven't experienced a heterosexual relationship, but 3 years can do critical emotional harm on a man. Especially if his GF is looking for an upgrade. Why not play the same game while leaving her clueless? Priceless.

I hope you're following, the OP's GF thinks she can get away with it. Not different from women these days, it just takes one swift Heisman to the face. The entitled GF thinks she is hot sh*t, until OP jizzes on an HB-Hotter than Thou and dumps her.

OP, please deliver....