Weird Dilema. Single vs Taken Women.

[IM0001]

Well ive been off and on being the DJ around here. But lately Im just getting burned out with soo much going on this summer. 2 jobs, Racing Autocross, Water Skiing, Dancing, Etc. Its hard to find women that are worth any of my time around here. I have 3 im working with right now but sadly the only one that is awesome to be around and a great friend is also the one taken by another... guy right now. He has her love and for now im not going to try anything. She is a great dance partner and friend and im going to keep it on the edge just in case she dumps him eventually. If not well she is the only girl that doesnt have to think sooo damn much about things I want to get together and do. I can always count on her for Dancing on sunday nights and ocasional get togethers during the week here and there.

Now thats it. The taken one is sane, smart, and fun.

Then I get the 99.9% of the rest of the girls I meet who are complete nutcases. Sure they are fun and funny to be around, but it seams that they cannot get out of their own damn way and have a good time like my dance partner. Why are they soo afraid to take a chance to have a good time with me.
One just finally got out of a stupid relationship with a guy that got jealous about everything and even read her text messages which made contacting her kinda suck. (we were in the same study groop at school but he didnt seam to care lol). I asked her to dinner once and she said it would be fun, but while trying to pick a time she is free she really is hard to keep the info coming. Still debating if thats just her normal self or she isnt into me. She always seams to ask why I dont text her or call her yet she always ends up with a MOTD that makes planning out something ahead of time a PITA.
She did just get a new phone but im still going to wait this out one last time.

The other I met while autocrossing. Her and her grandpa both race in his C6 Z06.. There is just something hot about this hot and young girl driving a car with 505HP well that just turns me on lol. Anyway also we have a lot in common but like every Seinor HS girl they think soo much that when I plan something out to meet up later in the week. They just dont reply. No message saying they can or cant. I am a planing kinda guy. I have a lot going on and girls do not take a focus on my life yet because i have no GF so there is no need yet. Still Id like to make some time here and there but when i cannot plan it out for at least 2 to 3 days ahead of time then when i do i jsut get flaked on, it just really burns me.

Im not looking for anyone to just get laid with. I want a LTR girl and Im really searching for a girl that holds some certain standards like I have yet the only ones the seam sane, reliable, and fun are all the taken ones. All the single ones i meet, of any age, are just tooo damn corrupt with this flake, thinking too much, attitude that it really just makes me not want to waste any time at all on them.

Yet for some reason Im wired soo damn much for a woman I cant help but want one lol.

I can easily DJ some lesser women that I could easily just hang with and do whatever but im not like that. I was raised up as a Christian with good morals and I want a woman hopefully similar in standing. At least a Virgin would be all im asking here lol. I hold women in Respect and do not want to hurt one by doing anything I shouldnt before marrage.

I know im missing something here but this should be enouth for thoes willing to read and maby give me some insite on my problems.

Thanks

Bob

 

[mrRuckus]

What are you talking about?

 

[ObieJuan]

The taken one is sane, smart, and fun.

I agree wholeheartedly with this statement. It seems that girls whom are happy, have great personalities and values always give off a vibe that they're taken. I work for a company that is chock full of positive people who are a delight to talk to- 85 percent of the people are women. I've struck up conversations with many of them and took a guess on which ones were taken(without looking for the ring) and was shocked to find out how many times I was right!

A lot of single women out there are usually single for a reason, it seems- not necessarily true for all single women but the generalization seems to be, more often than not. You just have to explore all venues, keep talking to all sorts of people and not place too much emphasis or hope on any one person. I can't really see any problems- just keep doing what you're doing!

 

[Le Parisien]

I can easily DJ some lesser women that I could easily just hang with and do whatever but im not like that. I was raised up as a Christian with good morals and I want a woman hopefully similar in standing. At least a Virgin would be all im asking here lol. I hold women in Respect and do not want to hurt one by doing anything I shouldnt before marrage.

Bob

This is where it's gonna be difficult...:nervous:

I'm not the kind of guy who's after random lays either, I praise people with "morals" (although people have different definitions for this word).

But the religion part and the being virgin part might be a big obstacle, you might end up doing things that are either extreme or hypocrite (like "as long as there's no vaginal penetration, it's not sex" kind of crazy "christian youth" sh*t).

Concerning the taken ones vs single ones thought, I think almost everything happens for a reason. Most likely, those girls are taken for a reason. If you or I or the next guy thinks of her as LTR material, it's very likely that many other guys think the same. Because she is a great girl and LTR material.

I like to quote this anecdotic French saying a lot: "girls are like parking spaces, the best ones are always taken." Sometimes you just need to be on the right spot at the right time. Or you can choose the easier path: low quality ones. Just like parking spaces, if you accept to lower your expectations, when you go far enough, there are always some badly situated spaces that are available all the time.

 

[IM0001]

Thanks for the responces. Definitly good to see some people can see what im trying to say through all the giberish... Being tired, working my ass off, and kinda lonely just racks the brain if you know what I mean lol.

It is so true that all the good ones are taken. I mean even as young as 18 they are taken and the rest are just not what im looking for. Heck they might be worth looking for if they could just get out of their own way and give me a shot. In no way am I needy or desperate but its a serious annoyance seeing her have a great time, talk positive to all her friends about the fun she had, always sounds game to go again or maby take it to a date level and then all of a sudden just completely cuts contact.. Why they do this is soo confusing to me. partially I think its due to this damn Sacramento Culture. The ones I find amazing are the ones that havent read the Girly magazines and live on MTV. Heck the one Im dancing with didnt even have the internet untill just a week ago lol. (Sex ed for her was American Pie with her mom to answer questions lol.) thats how innocent I want em and yes its 1 in 1000 but as this ones prooves there out there.

Im not one of the many christians like i meet who think anything outside of Intercourse is ok.. But damn do i want to do everything else. Hey im a man too. But i hold the respect for women that makes me have a hard time just touching a women. Since I have been doing a lot of dancing. (Mostly Salsa) I have learned how to touch a women with respect but its tough for me to do anything else. Grind dancing and whatnot just makes me uncomfortable seeing im grinding someones wife someday. Untill she is at GF status ill probably always be like this.

I guess im just searching for help on meeting and initiating enouth interest in a woman that like the one I have now, to actually follow through with a meeting wether its just for some coffee or going dancing or even racing. How can women be afraid to just go have a good time in a public place where they can have fun doing things that arent like every other guy they have met.

Im unique and it sure shows compaired to my other friends. though they have gotten together with many women and done a lot of things i do not regret being the outsider a bit.

 

[ObieJuan]

Im unique and it sure shows compaired to my other friends. though they have gotten together with many women and done a lot of things i do not regret being the outsider a bit.

Even though you don't regret being an outsider it's going to be hard to get a good relationship going with your beliefs in today's society. I believe that women have to view you in a sexual way to be attracted to you- whether or not you actually engage in the act is your decision, but that element has to be there. Also I believe many women that find you attractive would not want to be kept waiting for sex if they pursued you.

Heck they might be worth looking for if they could just get out of their own way and give me a shot. In no way am I needy or desperate but its a serious annoyance seeing her have a great time, talk positive to all her friends about the fun she had, always sounds game to go again or maby take it to a date level and then all of a sudden just completely cuts contact..

I'd say she probably DID have a great time with you but her saying that meant more along the lines of "I had a great night out that night". Girls love attention, that of which you were providing. Once the night was over she wasn't thinking about you at all. IMO don't even hint at dating, just ask for a number if you're so inclined as long as you have good rapport and are getting good signals that she's into you...that way there's no pressure by labeling it "a date".

I would say your beliefs will make it most difficult to meet girls at the places you've been going. If you want to increase your chances of meeting a genuine girl then go to places that are likely to bring out qualities in people you're looking for- any places that have volunteer work, charitable organizations, churches, schools, even christian bookstores might be good places to visit.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

I meet a friend through lavalife who is a virgin, who is a Christian (of some form, but not actively going to church), and seems to be sincere with me. I'm romantically into her and hope to have an LTR with her. She's around 25 and is a virgin.

I've meet one person through a referral of a past client. While, I'm not that much into her, she' over 30 and she's also a virgin. She's a movie buddy.

Don't lose heart, try online dating, Christian online dating sites, have friends, family or co-workers who know you well to be on the look out for quality women.

 

[flexion_]

Its all a numbers game.