happyhourhero
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2003
- Messages
- 84
- Reaction score
- 0
Alright fellows, i'm back from a sort of personal journey where i experimented with all the stuff i have been reading here as well as other places. It was time to get off the computer and out into real game. And i've learned a lot - from watching, from trying, from analyzing, and from doing some crazy shat that was basically to get over my self consciousness. So here are a few nuggets of wisdom to get that head of yours on straight. This is the stuff that has brought me to my truly confident place.
*Note, i didn't create this stuff, just picked it up here and there so i wanna give credit where credit is due, just can't remember all the different places i got all this
*Also note, looks don't mean jack shat, i'm a guy that girls hit on me because of my looks, yet i didn't kiss a girl till i was 19.
Off we go, enjoy the ride as you (hopefully) work with these things for the months ahead and beyond and find yourself in a much more content and successful place.
1) Ask Empowering questions (this is my number 1 tool as of now)
Your mind, especially your sub-conscious is an amazing thing. It knows, and remembers things that you have long forgotten, partied away, or simply thought was insignificant. It is very smart so when you ask it questions, whether positive or negative it will find the answers for you. You HAVE to quit asking questions to yourself that will yield negative answers. No more "why can't i get a girl to like me or even talk to me?" Your brain and sub-conscious will give you the answers back even though they will reinforce your negative outlook (your shy, not funny, fat, whatever), it doesn't care how the answers affect you.
Instead ask questions such as these:
What about me magnetically attracts the ladies to me?
How do i make others feel so good about me as well as themselves?
Why am i such a confident person?
etc. etc. make up your own for whatever it is you want to improve and then contemplate on the question for a while. Your sub-conscious will start throwing things out and you'll be like "damn, me, i didn't realize how great i am!" Some bomb azz stuff right there.
2) Affirmations
You've heard this before, they work, so do em - in the shower, before you go to bed, in line at the grocery store, before you hit on that hottie. Any time and all the time
3) Only you determine how you feel and what mood you are in
Don't underestimate this one, realizing this fact has made life so much easier to deal with as well not to mention the girls. Face it, chicks are f'd in the head, they pull some of the most unreal and psycho sh*t. And if you don't allow this to affect you, your way ahead of the majority. Also girls can sense this kind of stuff and when they pull something that drives every other guy crazy but not you, it will flip their world upsidedown. Although harder in bummer situations, Realize at any given time or in any situation YOU are the one who determines YOUR mood.
4) Replay screw ups and mentally fix them
Ever had a night with the ladieswhere nothing goes right, or a night where you just said one thing wrong or didn't say something you should have and after the fact its sooooo obvious what you should have done and then you can't stop kicking yourself?? Ya, didn't think so, but in case it ever happens, simply mentally rehearse the whole situation (see it, hear it, feel all the feelings) but instead of screwing it up like you did in real life, mentally fix it and do the right thing. This seems to get rid of that uncontrollable urge to hit your head against the wall a couple times. Also, if that situation comes up again, you'll be armed and dangerous. Watch out ladies
5) Journal (don't call me gay quite yet.....wait till the next one)
I now journal every interaction i have with a girl. I write them out as detailed as possible, then at the end i bullet point out the things that i did right, the things i did wrong, what i could have done to fix these wrongs, and different directions i could have taken the interaction. Writing something down just seems to engrain stuff in my brain, so that the next time i'll come up with the right thing to say/do/not do
6) Keep up with current style and hygiene
This year i completely changed my look. I play music and i used to try and pull off the gritty rock star look and i have news for ya - this doesn't seem to work unless you are actually a rock star (wow, could have fooled me) I now spike my hair (a la brad pitt) keep my face, nails, teeth, ears, nose hair impeccable. I pluck my bushy brows, get regular hair cuts, go for the occasional tanning session in the winter, I dress GREAT, I shower before class, even the 8am ones, and i actually shave now too.There are very few days that i don't look the absolute best i can that day. This alone will greatly improve your confidence. Girls notice these things and i don't know why they are so important to them but they are so you might as well have everything going for you that you can.
7) Laugh...Every morning
I got this from this board, can't remember who ya are, but thanks. Every morning when i wake up, I laugh for like 5 minutes. Just get it going and you'll think of funny stuff and have no problem keeping it going. I read somewhere that laughing releases a chemical 10 times stronger than heroine and this chemical zaps stress away. This chemical is extremely addicting but in a wonderful way. Trust me after a while, you won't be able to cope without your morning fix
So there it is, its been working for me so take it for what you will. When i first came to this place i could have never imagined how far i'd come and this is some amazing stuff that i hope you will use and will help you. Again thanks and props to whomever or wherever i got each of these little yet oh so powerful tools
Take care y'all
*Note, i didn't create this stuff, just picked it up here and there so i wanna give credit where credit is due, just can't remember all the different places i got all this
*Also note, looks don't mean jack shat, i'm a guy that girls hit on me because of my looks, yet i didn't kiss a girl till i was 19.
Off we go, enjoy the ride as you (hopefully) work with these things for the months ahead and beyond and find yourself in a much more content and successful place.
1) Ask Empowering questions (this is my number 1 tool as of now)
Your mind, especially your sub-conscious is an amazing thing. It knows, and remembers things that you have long forgotten, partied away, or simply thought was insignificant. It is very smart so when you ask it questions, whether positive or negative it will find the answers for you. You HAVE to quit asking questions to yourself that will yield negative answers. No more "why can't i get a girl to like me or even talk to me?" Your brain and sub-conscious will give you the answers back even though they will reinforce your negative outlook (your shy, not funny, fat, whatever), it doesn't care how the answers affect you.
Instead ask questions such as these:
What about me magnetically attracts the ladies to me?
How do i make others feel so good about me as well as themselves?
Why am i such a confident person?
etc. etc. make up your own for whatever it is you want to improve and then contemplate on the question for a while. Your sub-conscious will start throwing things out and you'll be like "damn, me, i didn't realize how great i am!" Some bomb azz stuff right there.
2) Affirmations
You've heard this before, they work, so do em - in the shower, before you go to bed, in line at the grocery store, before you hit on that hottie. Any time and all the time
3) Only you determine how you feel and what mood you are in
Don't underestimate this one, realizing this fact has made life so much easier to deal with as well not to mention the girls. Face it, chicks are f'd in the head, they pull some of the most unreal and psycho sh*t. And if you don't allow this to affect you, your way ahead of the majority. Also girls can sense this kind of stuff and when they pull something that drives every other guy crazy but not you, it will flip their world upsidedown. Although harder in bummer situations, Realize at any given time or in any situation YOU are the one who determines YOUR mood.
4) Replay screw ups and mentally fix them
Ever had a night with the ladieswhere nothing goes right, or a night where you just said one thing wrong or didn't say something you should have and after the fact its sooooo obvious what you should have done and then you can't stop kicking yourself?? Ya, didn't think so, but in case it ever happens, simply mentally rehearse the whole situation (see it, hear it, feel all the feelings) but instead of screwing it up like you did in real life, mentally fix it and do the right thing. This seems to get rid of that uncontrollable urge to hit your head against the wall a couple times. Also, if that situation comes up again, you'll be armed and dangerous. Watch out ladies
5) Journal (don't call me gay quite yet.....wait till the next one)
I now journal every interaction i have with a girl. I write them out as detailed as possible, then at the end i bullet point out the things that i did right, the things i did wrong, what i could have done to fix these wrongs, and different directions i could have taken the interaction. Writing something down just seems to engrain stuff in my brain, so that the next time i'll come up with the right thing to say/do/not do
6) Keep up with current style and hygiene
This year i completely changed my look. I play music and i used to try and pull off the gritty rock star look and i have news for ya - this doesn't seem to work unless you are actually a rock star (wow, could have fooled me) I now spike my hair (a la brad pitt) keep my face, nails, teeth, ears, nose hair impeccable. I pluck my bushy brows, get regular hair cuts, go for the occasional tanning session in the winter, I dress GREAT, I shower before class, even the 8am ones, and i actually shave now too.There are very few days that i don't look the absolute best i can that day. This alone will greatly improve your confidence. Girls notice these things and i don't know why they are so important to them but they are so you might as well have everything going for you that you can.
7) Laugh...Every morning
I got this from this board, can't remember who ya are, but thanks. Every morning when i wake up, I laugh for like 5 minutes. Just get it going and you'll think of funny stuff and have no problem keeping it going. I read somewhere that laughing releases a chemical 10 times stronger than heroine and this chemical zaps stress away. This chemical is extremely addicting but in a wonderful way. Trust me after a while, you won't be able to cope without your morning fix
So there it is, its been working for me so take it for what you will. When i first came to this place i could have never imagined how far i'd come and this is some amazing stuff that i hope you will use and will help you. Again thanks and props to whomever or wherever i got each of these little yet oh so powerful tools
Take care y'all
