Troubles of being goodlooking and single

[Crimson Tide]

Barbara Walters: Does it bother you that people talk more about your looks than your magazine?

John Kennedy Jr: Listen, people could say a lot worse things about you than your attractive, or you look good in a bathing suit.

 

[Being_the_Don]

female c*ckblocks are horrible but men trying to cut off convo etc, thats normally them trying to be the dominant (alpha) one, you need to speak up and be heared it sounds like you just dont have status around those men, hit the gym and notice how they dont talk that way when your 2st heavier with muscle

I do hit the gym, I post regularly down in the H&F forum. If I didn't have status they weouldn't be nervous. I can hold my own, but as I said these guys become very uncomfortable when I show up not the other way around. I can walk right up and immerse myself in a convo and these guys will glare, roll their eyes. As I said, I notice that when I come into a room where there are guys with women they guys usually try to end whatever it was they were talking about so that the women won't have a chance to talk to me. They don't cut me off when I'm talking they try to hush up when they see me walk in.

Another thing is that when I'm walking down the street often times people will move aside to let me pass but I also see guys giving me hate looks, mostly it's guys who are less attractive but still why hate like that?

 

[jamescr73]

mostly it's guys who are less attractive but still why hate like that?

Its just AFC jealousy.

 

[LostAndConfused]

I see some merit to what he's saying. One downside of being attractive is that you get resentment from less attractive people-both men AND women. the ugly females will do their best to c*ckblock if they know you're interested in someone they know. It's happened to me and it is not good especially if the woman you are going for is friends with the ugly c*ckblock.

Thats my biggest problem. Every 8-10 I go for has some friends in the area who wants me even more than the hot girl does and so the ugly chick pretty much throws herself at me, and I always never know what to do because on one hand, if I went for the hot girl, the hot girl would think I'm an a** hole for not going for her ugly friend, and on the other hand if I tried to play a game where I seemed more interested in the ugly girl, the hot girl eventually stops showing any interested in me at all.

Plus, I have no idea what to say when a situation like that arises.

 

[mahon83050]

I see some merit to what he's saying. One downside of being attractive is that you get resentment from less attractive people-both men AND women. the ugly females will do their best to c*ckblock if they know you're interested in someone they know. It's happened to me and it is not good especially if the woman you are going for is friends with the ugly c*ckblock.

People will also make assumptions about you based on your looks and can even start rumors about you which despite your personality to the contrary some folks will continue to believe (the lies, I mean). To that you just have to ignore them and know that better people see through the lies and bull.

And have any of you ever come into a room and guys show anger when you show up? They will suddenly stop talking and if women happen to be there, the guy(s) will either try to change subject or end the convo altogether so that the women who are there won't have a chance to talk to you? It does happen and usually it's AFCs or wannabe AMOGs who do it. So I do think there will always be people who will hate you if you're attractive. And women can be nervous around attractive guys, and even flake because they worry you'll cheat on them.

But being physically attractive is important. It is a sign of vitality and mental fitness, too. Most physically attractive people are more confident than less attractive people (unless you get really REALLY ripped on by haters) and often times physical attractiveness is coupled with intelligence. So it's better to be healthy (ie attractive) than the opposite.

As far as getting negative treatment from guys:

I think this is only the case if you are model handsome or strikingly handsome.

Guys who are rude or hating on you because you are good-looking tend to have low self esteem and dislike their own looks.

I am not strikingly handsome, but fairly attractive and for the most part like my own looks. I also prefer to interact with good-looking people whether they are male or female.

I think UGLY people are the ones who are mistreated since nobody wants to look at an ugly face.

 

[Maxtro]

Oh my God people will complain about everything!!!

Help I've got problems because I'm good looking. Help I've got problems because I'm tall. Just shut the fuck up! Being good looking and or tall is MUCH better than being average in looks and and below average in height. You good looking people have it much easier than those that aren't so handsome. I never have women approaching me and very rarely do they even check me out. I have the fucking handicap of being slightly below average in the overall looks category. Most women are not interested in me, based on my physical appearance. I need to struggle to improve my personality, confidence and game, because those are the only things that will get me a girl.

Those that are good looking should be grateful that they have what they have. Don't brag and definitely don't complain. Getting a gift and complaining about it is a sign of selfishness.

 

[mahon83050]

Oh my God people will complain about everything!!!

Help I've got problems because I'm good looking. Help I've got problems because I'm tall. Just shut the fuck up! Being good looking and or tall is MUCH better than being average in looks and and below average in height. You good looking people have it much easier than those that aren't so handsome. I never have women approaching me and very rarely do they even check me out. I have the fucking handicap of being slightly below average in the overall looks category. Most women are not interested in me, based on my physical appearance. I need to struggle to improve my personality, confidence and game, because those are the only things that will get me a girl.

Those that are good looking should be grateful that they have what they have. Don't brag and definitely don't complain. Getting a gift and complaining about it is a sign of selfishness.

Well, then, the million dollar question is?

WHY DO YOU SEE YOURSELF AS SLIGHTLY BELOW AVERAGE LOOKING?

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR FACE?

 

[ketostix]

I do hit the gym, I post regularly down in the H&F forum. If I didn't have status they weouldn't be nervous. I can hold my own, but as I said these guys become very uncomfortable when I show up not the other way around. I can walk right up and immerse myself in a convo and these guys will glare, roll their eyes. As I said, I notice that when I come into a room where there are guys with women they guys usually try to end whatever it was they were talking about so that the women won't have a chance to talk to me. They don't cut me off when I'm talking they try to hush up when they see me walk in.

Another thing is that when I'm walking down the street often times people will move aside to let me pass but I also see guys giving me hate looks, mostly it's guys who are less attractive but still why hate like that?

Well "ugly" guys get player hated and ****blocked by other guys too. When a guy is trying to talk to some chick if anything other guys will ****block and try to blow you out more if they think you'er lower value and unattractive. You're starting to sound like a crybaby and upset that not everyone is nice and lovey dovey. Yeah it's a competitive world for guys especially. That's because there's, contrary to what some might believe, finite resources (hot available women for example) and infinity demands and wants (almost infinite number of guys wanting all the hot girls).

 

[Maxtro]

Well, then, the million dollar question is?

WHY DO YOU SEE YOURSELF AS SLIGHTLY BELOW AVERAGE LOOKING?

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR FACE?

It's a combination of me being average looking, (face) below average in height 5'6 and I have a "soft" body.

The only things I can do to improve my appearance to women is improve the things I can control, hair, body and clothes.

If was buff, had great hair and great clothes I would still get blown away (based on looks) buy a guy that has the same things I do and is better looking and taller.

So I am doing everything in my power to make myself more attractive to women while I also improve my personality, confidence and game.

 

[mahon83050]

It's a combination of me being average looking, (face) below average in height 5'6 and I have a "soft" body.

The only things I can do to improve my appearance to women is improve the things I can control, hair, body and clothes.

If was buff, had great hair and great clothes I would still get blown away (based on looks) buy a guy that has the same things I do and is better looking and taller.

So I am doing everything in my power to make myself more attractive to women while I also improve my personality, confidence and game.

Well, I agree what you are saying, but what is it that makes your face only average?

Do you have flat cheeks, a big nose, acne scarred skin, a weak chin?

 

[mahon83050]

Well "ugly" guys get player hated and ****blocked by other guys too. When a guy is trying to talk to some chick if anything other guys will ****block and try to blow you out more if they think you'er lower value and unattractive. You're starting to sound like a crybaby and upset that not everyone is nice and lovey dovey. Yeah it's a competitive world for guys especially. That's because there's, contrary to what some might believe, finite resources (hot available women for example) and infinity demands and wants (almost infinite number of guys wanting all the hot girls).

Yea, this is defintely true. When it comes to picking up chicks, there is definitely a pecking order amongst the male mindset. Single Good looking men will get pissed off when they see a guy they are "superior" to in looks with a hot chick when they are getting nothing.

As for your hot women comment, not sure if I agree. Research tells us there are more attractive women out there because attractive looking parents are 38% more likely to have a daughter than they are a son.

While there are VERY FEW women out there who are "smoking, drop dead gorgeous" HOT, I believe there are a large amount of women who are atleast cute/attractive. Not sure about you, but that is all I need to be happy. A nice 7-8 with a good personality, not some 9-10 bombshell that is going to be stared at and constantly hit on by other men. (WHO WANTS THAT?

 

[Maxtro]

Well, I agree what you are saying, but what is it that makes your face only average?

Do you have flat cheeks, a big nose, acne scarred skin, a weak chin?

Big nose, weak chin. I don't have what is needed for a face to be considered good looking, what ever that is. I never had a woman tell me I was good looking so I know I'm missing something.

Why do you ask? I just realized that it's not a good idea for me to even post in a thread like this because it forces me to focus on my faults. Doing that causes low self confidence.

I'm just here because I'm bored and I don't want to do my math homework.

 

[mahon83050]

Big nose, weak chin. I don't have what is needed for a face to be considered good looking, what ever that is. I never had a woman tell me I was good looking so I know I'm missing something.

Why do you ask? I just realized that it's not a good idea for me to even post in a thread like this because it forces me to focus on my faults. Doing that causes low self confidence.

I'm just here because I'm bored and I don't want to do my math homework.

I guess I get annoyed when people complain about facial features that can be fixed through surgery. I also have a weak chin like you claim. It makes my already prominent nose look bigger than it really is. I am seriously thinking about getting a chin implant or a sliding genioplasty (they cut the chin bone and move it forward) to correct this.

Is it expensive? Yeah, sure it ain't cheap (3K-5K) but maybe I just won't take a vacation for three years.

Remember, your looks (facial looks) affect every part of your life. It affects the way you feel about yourself (duh), the way others treat you, how successful you will be in a career and how physically attractive your partner will be.

If there is a way to fix these "facial defects" through surgery, I AM ALL FOR IT!!

 

[Maxtro]

Fixed through surgery?! LOL I wouldn't go that far. My looks aren't a bonus but they are not a handicap. I might spend 3-5k if it would make me 3-5 inches taller but my face isn't that big of a deal. I know I'm not good looking, just average and I try to not let it bother me.

If I had that much money to blow I'd spend it on pick up workshops and seminars. That would be much better and more useful than trying to make me good looking.

 

[mahon83050]

Fixed through surgery?! LOL I wouldn't go that far. My looks aren't a bonus but they are not a handicap. I might spend 3-5k if it would make me 3-5 inches taller but my face isn't that big of a deal. I know I'm not good looking, just average and I try to not let it bother me.

If I had that much money to blow I'd spend it on pick up workshops and seminars. That would be much better and more useful than trying to make me good looking.

Well, sounds like you are saying you are not good looking because you are short? Take it from a tall guy who is 6'0": Height is overrated and I sure as hell don't have girls throwing themselves at me because I am taller than 80% of all other males. I would rather be 5'6" and handsome than 6'3" and ugly any day of the week.

 

[Maxtro]

Consider this. The average male height in America is 5'10. Being above average in height is definitely a good thing. If you check out match.com or the yahoo personals, most women say they want their man to be at least 5'8. I'd say being tall (within reason) is more of a plus than being good looking. BTW being 6'0 and average is much better than being 5'6 and average. You are a good 6 inches taller than me.

Both a mans height and his looks also affect his self confidence. Anyways I've gone off-topic.

 

[mahon83050]

The average American male height is 5'9" actually (according to most websites). I am not going to disagree with you and say your 5'6" stature is not a disadvantage, but height is far from the end all be all of things.

A good looking face is more important than height (unless you are 5'2" or something)

I actually read a book recently by dating "expert" Rom Willis who is African American.

He NEVER mentioned once the importance of a mans height in attracting women. He seemed to emphasize physique, dress, shoes and confidence as the most important.

 

[Maxtro]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_height#Average_adult_height_around_the_world

USA 175.8 cm 162.5 cm 5 ft 9.2 in 5 ft 3.77 in 20+
USA 178.2 cm 164.1 cm 5 ft 10.1 in 5 ft 4.6 in 20-39 Whites
USA 177.8 cm 164.0 cm 5 ft 10.0 in 5 ft 4.6 in 20-39 African-American
USA 169.7 cm 158.1 cm 5 ft 6.8 in 5 ft 2.2 in 20-39 Mexican-Americans
USA 179.25 cm 165.05 cm 5 ft 10.6 in 5 ft 5 in '80 - '83 born Whites (measured)
USA 178.22 cm 163.65 cm 5 ft 10.2 in 5 ft 4.4 in '80 - '83 born African-Americans

I'm white and Cuban. I'm shorter than the average Mexican (The second set of numbers are for women.) Oddly enough my dad is 5'10. I got no idea how come I turned out so short. Turns out the average height of a Cuban is 5'7. I wonder why my dad is so tall?

Probably the reason he didn't mention hight is because it is not something you can control. Ask any women if she prefers tall or short guys.

Anyways we are just going in circles now. You wish you were better looking. I was I was better looking and taller. Those are things that none of us can control, not counting surgery.

 

[Being_the_Don]

Oh my God people will complain about everything!!!

Help I've got problems because I'm good looking. Help I've got problems because I'm tall. Just shut the fuck up! Being good looking and or tall is MUCH better than being average in looks and and below average in height. You good looking people have it much easier than those that aren't so handsome. I never have women approaching me and very rarely do they even check me out. I have the fucking handicap of being slightly below average in the overall looks category. Most women are not interested in me, based on my physical appearance. I need to struggle to improve my personality, confidence and game, because those are the only things that will get me a girl.

Those that are good looking should be grateful that they have what they have. Don't brag and definitely don't complain. Getting a gift and complaining about it is a sign of selfishness.

I hear you but you know something that came to my mind while reading your post? That whether you know it or not you represent exactly what I'm talking about. And I'm not accusing you of being a hater only you know what you are inside. But your words fit a type. The type who look at me and just hate for the very fact that I happen to be around. I'm not the only guy who goes through this as I've read others in this thread talking about similar things. When a person talks about things that concern them it's not boasting, it's a life experience. That should also be respected, no?

I prefer to treat people as I wish to be treated but I don't let people walk across me either. And I'll admit that when I see the discomfort in the eyes of certain haters-espcially when I know that they're the ones who are going the extra mile to try to make me look stupid, I'll smile and insult them and watch them turn red faced before they walk away.

And yes, women can find a handsome guy to be very attractive but their defense mechanisms can intensify all the more. Because usually you're expected to behave a certain way, to have had so many girlfriends, and that if you're not involved with anyone long term you're lying about it, "too picky", "arrogant", "player", etc. Just on assumptions.

The problem with haters (of any kind) is that they refuse to put themselves in other people's shoes. Everyone has things that concern them, but people who make false judgements never see it all they want to do is project their own hostilities, resentment onto other people. That's a terrible flaw in human nature and a source of so much of the world's problems.

 

[aliasguy]

I hear you but you know something that came to my mind while reading your post? That whether you know it or not you represent exactly what I'm talking about. And I'm not accusing you of being a hater only you know what you are inside. But your words fit a type. The type who look at me and just hate for the very fact that I happen to be around. I'm not the only guy who goes through this as I've read others in this thread talking about similar things. When a person talks about things that concern them it's not boasting, it's a life experience. That should also be respected, no?

I prefer to treat people as I wish to be treated but I don't let people walk across me either. And I'll admit that when I see the discomfort in the eyes of certain haters-espcially when I know that they're the ones who are going the extra mile to try to make me look stupid, I'll smile and insult them and watch them turn red faced before they walk away.

And yes, women can f
ind a handsome guy to be very attractive but their defense mechanisms can intensify all the more. Because usually you're expected to behave a certain way, to have had so many girlfriends, and that if you're not involved with anyone long term you're lying about it, "too picky", "arrogant", "player", etc. Just on assumptions.

The problem with haters (of any kind) is that they refuse to put themselves in other people's shoes. Everyone has things that concern them, but people who make false judgements never see it all they want to do is project their own hostilities, resentment onto other people. That's a terrible flaw in human nature and a source of so much of the world's problems.

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ENOUGH, man.........

This is stupid. Grow up. BE who you ARE (or better yourself into who you WANT to be.)

Quit bellyaching about "haters." Run your game, use your gifts (i.e., "looks," I guess, and whatever else you've got.) And quit crying about how rough it is.

We've been beating the HELL outtta Wutang over this same kinda mindset (although he isn't blaming his lack of success on his GOOD looks, but his weird obsession with how BAD he looks.)



Man up, you GIRL!!!!!

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