Three big words.

[diceman]

Hey everyone!

OK, I've been seein' this girl who is, well, slightly plump. I know in terms of looks, she's not my ideal. But at the time when we met, we had lots in common, & it was just lots & lots of rampert sex, which was fun! Then after a while of this she wanted a relationship.

After some soul searching, i decided to give the relationship a go & we officially became an 'item'. It's coming up to almost 2 years now since we started having sex with each other. In this time, she's said she loves me a few times, & she genually does i think.. But i haven't recipricated. I know this is beginning to get to her, that i won't say 'I love you'.

For one thing, there was a time when i think i did love her, but after 2 years, things aren't as fun as they used to be, & we're falling into routine. I think at heart i liked being single & don't like the responcibility involved in being in a relationship.

Plus i KNOW i can do better. I mean, i REALLY like her company.. but loving her is a completly different matter. Sayin' that kinda cements use together, & i don't want to do that. With a 2 year relationship, am i just bein' an arse for doin' this?

She asked me why i wouldn't say 'i love her', and i couldn't give a real answer, just that "thats a huge thing to say, i don't think i'm ready" which REALLY upset her.

So.. what d'ya think?

 

[Vlad the Impaler]

Hey everyone!

OK, I've been seein' this girl who is, well, slightly plump.

It's coming up to almost 2 years now since we started having sex with each other.

2 years and you never tried to get her into the gym? If I ever date a fattie she'll have a gym membership soon.

As for saying I love you, I wouldn't say it unless you mean it. Then you are really in trouble.

 

[sexy_kuta]

fuk go ahead and say it man, say whatever the chick wants to hear.

now adays that word is soo abused, it has no meaning anymore

 

[romangod]

She asked me why i wouldn't say 'i love her', and i couldn't give a real answer, just that "thats a huge thing to say, i don't think i'm ready" which REALLY upset her.

So.. what d'ya think?

Not bad but I'd change it to........................... "that's a huge thing to say to such a huge girl."



Cheers!

 

[Interceptor]

Why arent things as fun as they used to be?

Did she change her behavior, or are you looking at her differently?Are you applying new standards on her that you didnt before and all of sudden she is not measuring up?
Just because a woman is plump does not mean shes unloveable. But you need to be very honest with yourself and find out if you never really were attracted to her, and were just with her because you got easy sex out of it.
If you accepted her before with that kind of figure, changing your standards isnt truly fair to her.
You can suggest to her to lose some weight, but you should approach it with respect, and consideration.
Examine closely her character and behavior. If they are agreeable and attractive to you, then you can have a good future with her.
If she is truly physically attractive to you if she didnt have the excess weight, then you might consider suggesting she lose some of it.
But if you were never really attracted to her, then you owe her an explanation and should cut things off.
Never be with a woman out of pity. Or to 'save' her.
And being with a ( apparently unattractive) woman for easy sex is something every man should examine and decide if it's truly high character to do so for them.




Why are you in a routine?
If shes good company then you should take advantage of that and plan fun , interesting things together.
You can also plan things she likes to do.

If you dont have a heavy workload and school load, there really shouldnt be much of an excuse not to go and do fun, interesting activities.
And going to the gym together can be a fun and rewarding experience for both of you.

I also believe that after being with her for two years and not being sure if you love her is not a good sign.
It means you havent been reflecting and learning about relationships.
It means you havent been paying attention, and growing and learning from this experience with a woman.
While I think it is pretty inconsiderate being together for that amount of time and not reciprocating the words, if you dont feel it, you dont feel it.
But dont say it out of guilt.

Ideally, you should feel love for a woman for who she is.
And admiration and respect for her should also be there.

This is an extremely important lesson for men to learn. So they can avoid just falling into a relationship out of convenience.