Thoughts on having money

[Weezy]

What are your guys thought on $$

The DJ Bible talks about how women want the security of it.

I'm at a place where I make a good amount of money.

I have several cars, my own company. I pretty sick pad. Nice clothes, etc.

I tend to always pay for everything on the date. If a chick insists on paying, great. But if they offer to split it's good enough for me and I just pay for it.

Does this weakin my frame by always paying for stuff or making it sound like moneys not that big of a deal?

 

[betheman]

...
I tend to always pay for everything on the date. If a chick insists on paying, great. But if they offer to split it's good enough for me and I just pay for it.

Does this weakin my frame by always paying for stuff or making it sound like moneys not that big of a deal?

Why do you pay? ok no doubt its small change to you, my concern is you may come across as a soft touch, you work hard for your money right? so should she if she wants a taste.

thats my 50 cents worth

 

[squirrels]

It depends.

I personally believe that a guy should pay on the first date...if the girl insists, have her leave a tip or something. Or if you pull a venue-change, get her to buy at the next place. But guy should pay first to establish dominance and independence.

If you end up spending a lot of money on a girl, it's your own damned fault, though. You plan the date, you decide where to take her. You don't take a girl you just met to the finest restaurant and buy her the most expensive meal possible on the first date. First dates should be cheap.

The important thing is that paying should not become an issue on the date. Do whatever you can to make it a non-issue. Pick up the check while she's in the bathroom sending her, "I'm OK, he's not a psycho" text to her friend. Just let her ride the experience you set up for her...all the way into your pants.

This also defines how much money YOU need to run with a given girl...you need enough that whatever you're doing, money doesn't become an issue.

 

[thegenerousjew]

As always squirrels offers sage advice

And yeah for first dates at least keep it fun and reasonable. Its about being relaxed. Hard to do when its a fine dining restaurant and everyone's trying to be on their best behaviour.

OT but I think grabbing a bite at a great junk food place is loads more effective at having fun on a first date. Think awesome ice cream parlours or the best place in town for a great cheese steak sandwich

 

[thegenerousjew]

It depends on some other things too. If I'm not serious about a girl but she's hot and great in bed I don't mind paying for dates [nothing else, no shopping, gifts or holidays] if it allows me to be lazy occasionally meaning I don't have to game her too much to get what I want.

Its just for a couple of months anyway and I love to eat well too

 

[Falcon25]

If you're broke, don't try to date, it doesn't work. Try to fuvk girls at random. Dating requires money.

 

[Annapolis Sailor]

I for one must say there is no such thing as 'security'. Everything in life is a gamble. In my opinion, if a woman wants 'security', she wants a free ride off your a$$. My first date is coffee or meeting at a public place. If we agree on going to a restaurant later on - conversation going great, good rapport - I make it a point we go dutch. If she asked me out to dinner, it is customary that she pay. If I ask, I pay.

I try to get in the first three dates going to venues without having to pay for anything so as to get a feel for her. Is she psyco, selfish, emotionally unstable, has a chip on her shoulder, etc., etc? The last thing you want is to sit at a restaurant knowing within the first 15 minutes that there is no way this person is going to have another date with you and suffer having to talk to this person for a few hours. Not to mention the awkward moment when the bill arrives and she suddenly excuses herself to go to the bathroom. If we both know that there is not going to be a second date, I have stopped a women on their expeditious path to the ladies room and told her in a nice way "by the way, do you want to charge your half of the bill or will you be using cash?" They get the idea.

By the way, this is a pet peeve of mine, if I ever get so much as a whiff that she is texting her friend or fields a call during my time over dinner with her, unless it is an absolute emergency call, and I do mean absolute emergency, I always make it a point to lose her number. Sometimes depending on my mood I may even end the date right then and there.

 

[jophil28]

I for one must say there is no such thing as 'security'. Everything in life is a gamble. In my opinion, if a woman wants 'security', she wants a free ride off your a$$. My first date is coffee or meeting at a public place. If we agree on going to a restaurant later on - conversation going great, good rapport - I make it a point we go dutch. If she asked me out to dinner, it is customary that she pay. If I ask, I pay.

I try to get in the first three dates going to venues without having to pay for anything so as to get a feel for her. Is she psyco, selfish, emotionally unstable, has a chip on her shoulder, etc., etc? The last thing you want is to sit at a restaurant knowing within the first 15 minutes that there is no way this person is going to have another date with you and suffer having to talk to this person for a few hours. Not to mention the awkward moment when the bill arrives and she suddenly excuses herself to go to the bathroom. If we both know that there is not going to be a second date, I have stopped a women on their expeditious path to the ladies room and told her in a nice way "by the way, do you want to charge your half of the bill or will you be using cash?" They get the idea.

By the way, this is a pet peeve of mine, if I ever get so much as a whiff that she is texting her friend or fields a call during my time over dinner with her, unless it is an absolute emergency call, and I do mean absolute emergency, I always make it a point to lose her number. Sometimes depending on my mood I may even end the date right then and there.

This post is perfect as a thread starter over at Loveshack...nice job Sailor !

 

[Wilko]

This post is perfect as a thread starter over at Loveshack...nice job Sailor !

Unplugging a few AFC's from the Matrix eh Morpheus?

 

[sodbuster]

It depends on WHAT you expect to get in exchange for buying. IF she senses you aren't "enough" without your money,it weakens your frame[you know, you are buying her dinner,spending money on her BECAUSE you need to impress her with your money ..... otherwise you can't get laid]

I gave an old[****ty picture-sons hated it]TV to a single mom with a cerebral palsy kid so the kid had her own TV to watch[I'd hate to watch Barney,etc. all day with a kid].Getting a date or getting laid wasn't any part of the decision[don't care either way,but it probably won't hurt]

 

[jophil28]

Unplugging a few AFC's from the Matrix eh Morpheus?

I was thinking that Sailors' post would be like tossing an M67 into their AFC bunker . It sure would be fun.
( Maybe an M69 might be more effective -anyone remember which one was the trainer ?)

 

[Zunder]

If you're broke, don't try to date, it doesn't work. Try to fuvk girls at random. Dating requires money.

Agree.

 

[lifeislearning]

If you're broke, don't try to date, it doesn't work. Try to fuvk girls at random. Dating requires money.

BS. Why do people say this? It certainly isn't true. If you can't think up a date for less than $10 you are boring and no wonder you can't find a girl to date!

Seriously though, here is the formula for one of my favorite dates:
FYI: I live in a high tourism city so some of these things may not work for you, but if you really try, you can think up something just as good.

1. Meet downtown, and take a quick walk through the historic district (I make sure to tell a good story about the historic brothels down there) FREE
2. Sneak onto a ghost tour for a story of two (if you get caught its just something to laugh and joke about) FREE
3. Press a penny and give it to her $0.51
4. Get 1 huge bowl of ice cream (to share of course. Bonus if she uses your spoon) $5-7
5. Give an impromptu tour through a fancy hotel lobby/historic house/expensive restaurant (make sure to go up and down stairs or elevators, make up incredibly false history and facts) FREE
6. Walk by a season specific public event: lights in the winter, street music, window shopping, etc $0-3 for candy, trinket, or tipping a musician

Total cost under $10. Lots of fun, things to talk about, laugh about, and most importantly: opportunities to lead her by the hand, and pull her in for a kiss.

 

[JD57]

I, just out of a 22 year stint in hell (aka marriage), just got punked by a 23 year old broke college student. She's 32, a broke an in debt student, and I'm a 51 year old professor (although not her professor). She took very little in material things from me. But what people don't understand is that for older guys, money is in reasonable supply; it's time, heart and emotion that are scarce. And she took a lot of the latter 3 from me. I am devastated over this. I might start a thread about it but the relevance here is that broke + game annihilated money and no game.

 

[Zunder]

BS. Why do people say this? It certainly isn't true. If you can't think up a date for less than $10 you are boring and no wonder you can't find a girl to date!

Seriously though, here is the formula for one of my favorite dates:
FYI: I live in a high tourism city so some of these things may not work for you, but if you really try, you can think up something just as good.

1. Meet downtown, and take a quick walk through the historic district (I make sure to tell a good story about the historic brothels down there) FREE
2. Sneak onto a ghost tour for a story of two (if you get caught its just something to laugh and joke about) FREE
3. Press a penny and give it to her $0.51
4. Get 1 huge bowl of ice cream (to share of course. Bonus if she uses your spoon) $5-7
5. Give an impromptu tour through a fancy hotel lobby/historic house/expensive restaurant (make sure to go up and down stairs or elevators, make up incredibly false history and facts) FREE
6. Walk by a season specific public event: lights in the winter, street music, window shopping, etc $0-3 for candy, trinket, or tipping a musician

Total cost under $10. Lots of fun, things to talk about, laugh about, and most importantly: opportunities to lead her by the hand, and pull her in for a kiss.

$10 won't even get my cars petrol meter above "empty".
And be fvcked if I am going to "meet a girl downtown". Maybe when I was 16.

 

[Falcon25]

BS. Why do people say this? It certainly isn't true. If you can't think up a date for less than $10 you are boring and no wonder you can't find a girl to date!

Seriously though, here is the formula for one of my favorite dates:
FYI: I live in a high tourism city so some of these things may not work for you, but if you really try, you can think up something just as good.

1. Meet downtown, and take a quick walk through the historic district (I make sure to tell a good story about the historic brothels down there) FREE
2. Sneak onto a ghost tour for a story of two (if you get caught its just something to laugh and joke about) FREE
3. Press a penny and give it to her $0.51
4. Get 1 huge bowl of ice cream (to share of course. Bonus if she uses your spoon) $5-7
5. Give an impromptu tour through a fancy hotel lobby/historic house/expensive restaurant (make sure to go up and down stairs or elevators, make up incredibly false history and facts) FREE
6. Walk by a season specific public event: lights in the winter, street music, window shopping, etc $0-3 for candy, trinket, or tipping a musician

Total cost under $10. Lots of fun, things to talk about, laugh about, and most importantly: opportunities to lead her by the hand, and pull her in for a kiss.

I'm not going to even respond to the possibly dumbest post I have ever read. I am 33 yrs old. I want to spend more than 10 on a date. I want to be able to show my girl I am secure, emotionally and financially. Get out of here with these dating tips for 17 year olds.

IF YOU DON'T HAVE MONEY, YOU CAN'T AND SHOULDN'T DATE. YOU SHOULD FOCUS ON MAKING MONEY. THEN YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.

 

[Jitterbug]

I don't have that much money, but when I pay for things on a date (I often do, I don't have a tight attitude with money), it's for my own enjoyment and comfort. The thought of impressing the girl with my cash never crosses my mind. I'm not rich and there are plenty of guys she likely knows who would be richer than me, so why do that?

 

[Falcon25]

I don't have that much money, but when I pay for things on a date (I often do, I don't have a tight attitude with money), it's for my own enjoyment and comfort. The thought of impressing the girl with my cash never crosses my mind. I'm not rich and there are plenty of guys she likely knows who would be richer than me, so why do that?

I'm the same way. It's just how I was raised. And, I will not befriend anyone who is cheap. Sorry, but it aint happening. I feel exactly the way you do. My point is that if I don't have money, I DON'T feel comfortable. The key word there is I. I'm a man in early thirties. There's no way I'm going on dates if I'm broke. I wouldn't enjoy myself, and it would show, and she would leave.

 

[Lateralus]

BS. Why do people say this? It certainly isn't true. If you can't think up a date for less than $10 you are boring and no wonder you can't find a girl to date!

Seriously though, here is the formula for one of my favorite dates:
FYI: I live in a high tourism city so some of these things may not work for you, but if you really try, you can think up something just as good.

1. Meet downtown, and take a quick walk through the historic district (I make sure to tell a good story about the historic brothels down there) FREE
2. Sneak onto a ghost tour for a story of two (if you get caught its just something to laugh and joke about) FREE
3. Press a penny and give it to her $0.51
4. Get 1 huge bowl of ice cream (to share of course. Bonus if she uses your spoon) $5-7
5. Give an impromptu tour through a fancy hotel lobby/historic house/expensive restaurant (make sure to go up and down stairs or elevators, make up incredibly false history and facts) FREE
6. Walk by a season specific public event: lights in the winter, street music, window shopping, etc $0-3 for candy, trinket, or tipping a musician

Total cost under $10. Lots of fun, things to talk about, laugh about, and most importantly: opportunities to lead her by the hand, and pull her in for a kiss.

I think this is ****ing good! But more as an appetizer, actually. I would give a short tour around my city to a girl from another city, before we go to a café to get a drink. Would I pay for her drink? Well... if it is a 'date' maybe. But I would never say the word 'date'. I'd rather say 'get together' in which we both benefit. With a free tour of my city's historical center, haha.

 

[Buddha_Mind]

Just make sure you are getting what you want...genuineness should be a part of that...I wouldn't worry too much about who pays what if those two things are being met and if you are happy.

OP -- happy you are in a state of abundance, keep that flowing.