This Girl Got Game

Pierce

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This girl that I have been dating for 2 months admitted to me that she thought I was passive and that she will at some times push my buttons just to see how mad I will get and what would i do. I can't even lie I aint familiar with relationships when your in love but I feel like I'd do anything for this girl and it seems that has backfired on me. Because of the niceness I showed her and ONLY her. (i am really a no bull**** type of dude and dont take **** so ever). Looking back on it I do see that this girl has whipped me to a T. Like everytime I get mad at her for something somehow I end up apologizing to her.... EVERY ****ING TIME.. She told me this today after I was talking about how I dont run game on her even though my intuition tells me I should. (Basically I stopped running game or being suave and just sounded like a love sick puppy being all emotionall all the time) She even told me that she didnt think I had the balls to break up with her....... Dispite all this bull**** I do love her and she says she loves me too and that she has always been like this.... What do you guys think I should do with this situation?

P.S. She has claimed that I am the one for her and that she loves me with all her heart and that we will get married. (i already asked if she would marry me ..... (without a ring) and she said yes.... so we are engaged technically.
 

Slickster

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Always tough to give advice in these situations.

She seems to have taken the alpha role in this relationship. Even though she says she loves you now the clock is ticking.

How long until she meets someone who doesn't let her take control? Someone who takes charge? Someone who is a challenge? Someone who doesn't get worked up by her little games? When she does this relationship is in trouble.

That is what you have to do. Whether you can turn it around at this point I don't know? Usually when you give a woman the upper hand and show her your a$$ it's tough to get any respect after that.
 

FinalWay

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if you let her speak that useless way of speaking and useless way of language to you and you deal with it than im sorry for you man. you really need to remember to hold the frame ! if she calls you out as a wimp (which she did) than you should put her in her place.
 
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Isko

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Alright you're engaged after 2 MONTHS!?? HOLY **** MAN. I mean, that's highly romantic, but logically your relationship is completely doomed. But it sounds like you aren't serious about it, and are just playing at being in love, which I have done. It's like a rollercoaster ride: A lot of highs and a lot of lows. I predict you're in for a lot of drama. And a lot of learning.

you told her that you don't run game, but that your intuition tells you you should. And she opened up, and actually told you that you were right. You don't HAVE to follow the principles on this site, but it will probably make your life more fun if you do. It's not "running game", it's putting yourself first. Don't be nice to her; it's not nice to be unnaturally nice to someone. That's like feeding your kids until they get obese, just saying "I'm giving them what they want." It's not good for her mental state.

Put yourself first, don't back down from your principles, don't take **** from her, even if she is your fiance. Tough love. Enough to make her feel like you DO have the balls to leave, and to stand up to her, etc.

She told you she doesn't think you have the balls to leave her. Grow those balls. Choose to have those balls =P Fear nothing. You're probably afraid of being alone, that you will never find a better girl, etc... Don't be.

If you change, you might lose this relationship, but seriously I think you should go down this road of growing balls. This relationship sounds unhealthy to me, and doomed. You either grow balls now, or get dumped/cheated on/verbally abused later. This girl is honest enough to tell you how she finds herself treating you. That's actually pretty awesome.
 
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Pierce

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I'm not a passive person just in this relationship. I really do love this girl though. That's why I put up with so much **** with her. I'm definately going to tone down on the niceness to her and just be real with her.
 

MeteorMash

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Pierce said:
I'm not a passive person just in this relationship. I really do love this girl though. That's why I put up with so much **** with her. I'm definately going to tone down on the niceness to her and just be real with her.
No one said you can't be nice to her

But what you are doing my friend is not being nice. You are Catering to her. You can Just being nice because your think it will make her like you more. You are afraid of a negative reaction from her. You are afraid of losing her.

I've been down this road before, and I'll tell you that it seems all good now, but eventually the girl will get tired of it. A girl wants someone who is confident and strong enough to stand up for himself and not allow himself to be run over by his girlfriend. My ex (a girl who sounds similar to yours) told me this exact same thing. She though she could run right through me in the beginning, but now feels like she can't. I'm still nice to her, but I stand my ground when I need too. Be thankful that she loves you enough to tell you this. lol most girls would just be like fvck this.

Don't be afraid to disagree with her. Treat like everyone else, don't take her sh1t. She's a person like everyone else. She might be your girl and all, but dont put her on a pedestal.
 

Pierce

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Heres some more about me.

I'm a Sophomore in college. people say im a pretty boy (and my gf always teases me because i care so much about my appearance)... and I'm also in a divine 9 greek (black greek).

Thanks for the advice MeteorMash. I'm trying as hard as I can not to be "whipped" so I can be real wit her and get my Alpha role LOL. I been listening to a little too many r&b songs and that got me feeling like I should always show her love.
 

jonwon

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When you date a girl, a man has to fight the wuss boy that takes over.

When a girl shows her potential a man can start thinking wuss thoughts like 'I'll have to work hard to keep this one'.

And starts doing things to keep the girl interested and happy.

Most men do it.

The thing is a man needs to check that stuff and make sure he is not turning into a door mat pleading beta boy of the highest order.

Yeh it's ok to be nice, but a guy needs to toss some shi* out too; a nice balance!

Even if your girl is an angle sent, she needs watering and a dose of manure to fully flower. You cant take away the shi* and just add the water, you need to toss in a little bit of both.

The problem is when guys become 'too nice', its the death toll of a relationship, he needs to avoid that 'too nice' puss* drying up label and retain what he was when she was first, attracted to him.

It's a fine balance, too much of a dic* she may walk, too much of a nice guy, she will walk all over you and not respect you.

A man needs to learn that balance.

If anything I will advocate a man being MORE of a dic* then being Too nice. Being more of a Dic*, will get your girls hamster in her head spinning that wheel and flood her with emotional drama that women love like a addict loves crack. Too much of a nice guy, her puss& dries up and she starts getting feelings for that cute guy who just told her her bum looks big in that dress!

Dont be afraid to embrace this side of you, women are naturally programmed to be attracted to that bit of manure. They crave it in a way, they actually want it, if you really want to please her, toss out some shi* now and again, stand up to her, make the choices, stand your ground. Women want it, they flow towards it, women want to be lead, THEY WANT A MAN TO LEAD THEM. It may not seem so but THEY WANT IT, they wont admit it, they just do it, they simply slot in to that frame.
 

MeteorMash

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Pierce said:
Thanks for the advice MeteorMash. I'm trying as hard as I can not to be "whipped" so I can be real wit her and get my Alpha role LOL. I been listening to a little too many r&b songs and that got me feeling like I should always show her love.
No problem man

But yea, There is nothing wrong with showing your girl love. Girls love to be loved, But they also like to be protected. She ain't gon feel protected by a guy who can't even stand up to her.

What she is doing is calling you out. She saying that you don't have balls and that she can do anything to you and you'll take it. Do you just let her say these things about you? Stand up for yourself and don't let your own girl put you down. Would you let your Boss put you down day after day even though you work hard?

love her with all your heart, but love is tough when it needs to be. It is forgiving, caring, and nice, but also has backbone. If she does something that doesn't please you, then let her know and don' stand for it.
 

Slickster

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Your woman needs to believe that you could walk away from her at any given moment and feel no loss whatsoever.

It is that uncertainty that will keep your relationship strong. I know it sounds backwards but that is how it works. As soon as she thinks she "has" you then you are in big trouble.

It has nothing to do with being nice.

Be a man. Next time she is talking sh!t or acting like she is in control of you, get up and walk out. Let her know that YOU are the boss not her. She has something to lose, not you. You have to do this with absolute conviction. No pvssying around.

Otherwise this relationship is doomed.
 

Pimp-sicle

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Pierce said:
This girl that I have been dating for 2 months admitted to me that she thought I was passive and that she will at some times push my buttons just to see how mad I will get and what would i do.

Bad sign #1 .... in other words she's calling you a wussy, a she-man, someone without a spine. Secondly this is a warning from her that she can get away with anything she wants and you'll still be there. None of this is attractive and your relationship is on the ropes.


I can't even lie I aint familiar with relationships when your in love but I feel like I'd do anything for this girl and it seems that has backfired on me. Because of the niceness I showed her and ONLY her. (i am really a no bull**** type of dude and dont take **** so ever). Looking back on it I do see that this girl has whipped me to a T. Like everytime I get mad at her for something somehow I end up apologizing to her.... EVERY ****ING TIME..

For some reason I'm picturing that Ronnie dude from Jersey Shore always apologizing to that dumb byatch he was dating on the show even though he usually did nothing wrong.

You are a chump right now bro.... she will play your @ss bad if she hasn't already.



She told me this today after I was talking about how I dont run game on her even though my intuition tells me I should. (Basically I stopped running game or being suave and just sounded like a love sick puppy being all emotionall all the time) She even told me that she didnt think I had the balls to break up with her.......

WTF are you thinking talking to her about "running game??" That's not something your ever suppose to talk about with a girl. Its something you do and that's it! This is AFC behavior to the max...



Dispite all this bull**** I do love her and she says she loves me too and that she has always been like this.... What do you guys think I should do with this situation?

She loves you? LMAO!!! You guys have been dating 2 months and your 19! You have NO IDEA what love is yet. Your infatuated with her; big difference between love and infautation.

P.S. She has claimed that I am the one for her and that she loves me with all her heart and that we will get married. (i already asked if she would marry me ..... (without a ring) and she said yes.... so we are engaged technically.


Wow.... your badly burned toast here dude. She will break up with you within the next few months unless she's comfortable dating you while cheating behind your back.




I sincerely hope this post is a joke, but my gut tells me your for real.







PIMP
 

starplayer

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Pierce said:
I'm not a passive person just in this relationship. I really do love this girl though. That's why I put up with so much **** with her. I'm definately going to tone down on the niceness to her and just be real with her.
Not love. Just oneitis.

It doesn't matter whether she SAYS she loves you. Does she ACT like it?

You talked to her about marriage after 2 months? I hope this is a troll post.

Your emotions are probably too fvcked up to regain the upper hand with her, and if you do manage to grab the frame she'll probably take it back soon enough anyway.

Sorry to sound so pessimistic, but I think this one is basically over for you - it's just a matter of time now. Now you know how important it is to keep control with the next girl.

Oh and like pimp-sicle said above, don't talk about game! Seriously dude. First rule of fight club...
 

Pierce

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Pimp-sicle said:
I sincerely hope this post is a joke, but my gut tells me your for real.







PIMP

this **** probably true folk. wat can i do to fix this **** cuz i really do like her!!!! ALOTTTTTTTT
 

CarlitosWay

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Tell her you need some time separated. Get your **** together and reevaluate yourself. Your setting yourself up for some heartbreak later on down the road. smh......
 

Slickster

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Pierce said:
this **** probably true folk. wat can i do to fix this **** cuz i really do like her!!!! ALOTTTTTTTT
You've already been given all the advice you need.

Can you follow it?
 
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