This forum isn't helpful to anyone, just depressing...

[Craig Reeves]

I don't complain much, really, I don't. However, this time I am.

I have been reading over this forum for quite some time, now. I've been reading the various posts today more than usual since I've had a little more time on my hands. However, I've noticed some things I wasn't exactly happy with....

No matter what thread I read, almost all of the replies I have been reading have revolved around the "You're not good enough" or "I have this and YOU don't" subject. I have not read one post today in any thread that didn't result in unbridled negativity and it ending in somebody saying "you don't have this and your hopeless" type of remarks.

I personally do not think that this board is very welcoming to guys who are self-concious and just want to get their game together. We need to be more encouraging to guys instead of just telling them "you're not a stud so you ain't getting laid, haus" and telling them that this is reality, because all we are doing is ENCOURAGING them to be even more AFC than they already are. What is stopping them from saying, "well, since this MASTER DON JUAN is telling I'm a chump, I must be pretty hopless"?

AFC's are NOT going to recover through ridicule. Most guys are AFC's BECAUSE of ridicule. I thought our cause was to encourage AFC's to get out there and make their lives better with women, not to step on them and try to make them feel small and hopeless.

AFC's do not feel like they have potential. AFC's don't think that THEY are what women are looking for. AFC's don't need to be told they are failures over and over again, yet that is all I have been reading on this forum. Instead of guiding them, we are further confirming to them that they are hopeless.

AFC's are ONLY going to recover through ENCOURAGEMENT. I personally believe that if we do not have something encouraging to say to somebody on this forum to not say it at all. We need to STOP talking about what WON'T get success and start talking about what WILL. AFC's already KNOW they are AFC's, which is why they are on this site. AFC's need to know what they can do to become successful. We need to stop discussing so much on what AFC's need to improve in, but HOW AFC's can improve in these areas.

I'd like to see more DJ bootcamps run here, too. There's just not enough. Period. AFC's need people to GUIDE them and ENCOURAGE them through self improvement, not just somebody who'll tell them that that will be the only way they're ever going to have a woman give them a second glance.

Now I know what you're about to say....."the DJ Bible does that"....but the DJ Bible isn't alive. The DJ Bible isn't a human being. The DJ Bible can't offer encouragement and a push forward. The DJ Bible can't make an AFC feel better about what he's doing.

Don't you guys get it? AFC's will look for any help they can GET which is why they are on this site! Do you not think that they're going to look to the DJ Bible? C'mon! I can tell ya right now that the DJ Bible is going to be the FIRST place that AFC's who want help look.

The reason why they post this stuff that they should "already know" is simply because they want ENCOURAGEMENT. These AFC's usually KNOW what to do, they just want ENCOURAGMENT from guys they feel may be able to teach them something new.

Don't get me wrong, critcism is a good thing, but if it isn't CONSTRUCTIVE critisism it is only discouraging. When an AFC posts something about a situation he is going through, we need to offer CONSTRUCTIVE critisim. Tell him EXACTLY what it is he did wrong or EXACTLY what it is he should have done to improve the situation for him. "You don't have what it takes" or "you're not a a mac daddy like me" ISN'T constructive criticism.

If you're doing a Field Report, this can be encouraging, but do it for the purpose of encouraging others, not just showing off to your fellow community members. The purpose of this site isn't to show off how big your nuts are, the purpose of this site is to guide honest good guys to success with women.

To the WOMEN of this forum: STOP bragging about how hot you are and how you wouldn't give "average guys" the time of day. Stop bragging about how you can use your b00bs to take advantage of AFC's. This stuff isn't encouraging.

AFC's see themselves as BELOW average, so you saying that kind of stuff on this forum could possibly make people who are just starting out feel intimidated and hopeless. I just ask that you ladies be more careful about the people that could possibly be reading what you write. If you're going to be here, why not instead of talking about the kind of guys that you WOULDN'T date, ENCOURAGE guys who are having problems.

Just because you happen to be female doesn't excuse you from the responsibilites as a member of this forum. This site is not an outlet for you to brag about your body and how unattainable you are, so if you aren't for the cause, it's best that you just not post at all.

I know I have complained a lot, but I'm just speaking my mind.

I just want to see more guys getting the girls of their dreams because *I* know how that feels and it feels so great that I want OTHER guys to experience it too. This is the mindset that the greatest teachers in the history of this site shared. They had a love for bringing AFC's to DJ-hood. They truly wanted to see AFC's become happy with their dating lives. There is no better feeling than seeing a guy who was once an AFC finally able to get a girl who HE thought was out of his league.

Unfortunately, I'm seeing more and more "teachers" who are more concerned with looking cool to gain the approval of others than actually contributing their knowledge to aspring DJ's.

I believe that ANYONE can become successful with women. He's just got to have the drive and know-how to get there, and we as a community can help him get there so much faster.

Thanks

 

[diablo]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=65502

 

[Craig Reeves]

Hm....looks like we'll have to do something about that then....

 

[Gonzalo]

I can more or less see what you say. I dont think everyone´s style is the same, though I for one think that questions of the type "should I ask for her number???" are just pointless to anyone who has read the bible and has done his homework on Doc Love and DeAngelo (whether their stuff is the way to go is a different topic, but I think every newbie needs to at least know whats up).

I for one don´t post much, mailny because almost every question I could come up had already been covered. It´s also not point of saying "everything has already been said, let´s take down the forum" like someone said, nor "flame away" when someone asks a questions which may be redundant to someone more experienced. But definately, people who say they´ve "studied" the bible are just lying if they ask stuff like "should I talk to her?". I mean, it´s not a matter of encouragement, it´s plain common sense. People who really want to improve should understand that change comes from within, and perhaps the most powerful tool they have access through the net for this purpose is the DJ bible. It´s kinda like knowing that eating french fries will make you fat, and asking "if I dunk them in ketchup, will they still make me fat?".

I share with you the view that everone can also become succesful, and also think flaming and bragging don´t really help anyone achieve that purpose. Best, G.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

No way.

I agree with most of your post but not this time.

These kids are lying to themselves,man.I and many people before me have already adressed that Sosuave virus posters become infected with.Bouncing between fantasies of being Super-man and the realities of there failures.

They brag endlessy and look down upon others who don't share the same Don Juan lifestyle(I don't know what this still).Yet the come back a few months later admitting to lying and being losers.Crying and *****ing constantly like little girls. It's disgusting and it needs to stop already.


I'm sick of it.

These are not teenagers who want to grind some lil over-devolped heffa.These are men deep into there 20's,30's,and 40's crying like little lil *****es because girls find them unacctractive.

^Does that sound normal to you?This site has the potential to help the most people cuz of it's sheer size and it's association with Askmen.com. But it's not.

Every year it slips a little more into the pit of nerd-dom and chessiness and all the veteran posters give up.The rest try to conform and start cuddling the rookies.

Stop it already.

70-80% of guys will never juggle a significant amount of women.Half of that are just so unattractive/socially awkard that they just won't get any..PERIOD.

Let's get serious and let's start helping eachother instead of consoling guys who won't ever make it.That's just bringing in more hopeless people by the dozens.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Reality's a b1tch, ain't it...

 

[Jariel]

The problem is that too many people are using this forum with a closed mind and have been brainwashed with false confidence and optimism.

Instead of accepting that a girl is blowing them off, they would rather think they can win her over with a bit of c+f and neg hits.

Instead of accepting that they need to lose some weight or freshen up their image, they think that a new attitude will turn them into Prince Charming.

Rather than accept that a technique or attitude doesn't work, they keep approaching for months without success.

Yes, it's important that we encourage people, but we need to encourage them in the right direction and stop feeding them false optimism.

 

[PYROTAK]

yeah its the truth.
personality can only go so far you gotta have everything else in order to back it up.

so if you think being more ****y and funny can make up for being 20 lbs overweight you are duely wrong.

instead dont' garner any false optimism and confidence, get off your ass stop reading this crap and goto the gym. get your sh1t in order.

 

[Wyldfire]

Last night I made a joke about my boobs, which was actually entirely on topic, I might add. The topic was about attractive women being able to use that advantage to make things easier for them. I posted about an experience that I had and amid laughing at myself for not realizing my license was almost a year expired, I was insulted...much like what you described. I'm not one to tolerate disrespect, so if someone goes there I'm likely to be sarcastic and seething...that's just how I am.

With that being said...you won't EVER hear me discouraging any poster on here when they ask for advice UNLESS it's discouraging them from going after someone who is a total waste of their time. I might be snarky to anyone who is rude to me, though...and that's justified.

Again...it's entirely appropriate to share a story about an incident where my looks and cleavage got me out of trouble on a thread about women having an advantage because of being attractive. Let's keep things in context, shall we? If I were telling that story on a thread about approaching women then you'd have a reason to be bothered by what I posted...but that's not what happened and your discomfort with my post about my breasts is entirely unwarranted.

Okay, carry on...

 

[Interpol]

I mostly agree witht Tha Realnezz here...The biggest problems with SS in my opinion:

1. 95% of people really have no basis for the advice they're giving, they just recycle the same sh*t from Pook or the Bible or whatever.

2. Some people still try to argue this site is about self-improvement rather than getting women. Whatever, guys. Self-improvement is a means to an end, that end is being succesful with women, that's why we're all here, so stop denying it.

I've been coming to SS for almost two years now. It has helped me in ways I can't even articulate. And though I still enjoy coming here to help others, it's mind-boggling how little substance is actually here. I've been visiting mASF more often lately, and the difference is like night and day...Those guys really know their sh*t! I learned more there in 20 minutes than I have in the last 2 months at SS.

I think one step to fixing these problems would be to add a "Field Reports" forum like they have at mASF. This would encourage sharing actual information, and hopefully discourage the vague, abstract, redundant "psychology" posts that have lately dominated the HS forum.

Agree, disagree?

 

[PYROTAK]

lol there is nothing wrong with woman using what they got.

anyone who thinks otherwise is lying to themselves and being not practical.

 

[Centaurion]

i dont think this is a site where we should stroke their (AFC's) ego and go all fluffy on their asses. They got to learn that they basically suck, and that they need to change.

 

[Juan_Man]

Wyldfire, get over yourself. You're not all that attractive if I recall correctly. Not to be rude, but guys will go for anything. Just a bit of reality that most women need to hear.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Juan_Man
Wyldfire, get over yourself. You're not all that attractive if I recall correctly. Not to be rude, but guys will go for anything. Just a bit of reality that most women need to hear.

See...this is a perfect example of why I end up posting about myself. If I get insulted and attacked I am going to respond and defend myself. For the love of Christ some of you need to wake up and smell the coffee. The very same guys that try to impress the other guys on this site by being rude and insulting to anything and everything female are the ones we all see crying in their teacups over some girl, showing insecurity and their weaknesses a few days later. Who on earth do these guys think they are fooling by fronting in such a way? Some women come here because they are interested in the subject matter, want to keep an eye on what guys are up to or like in my case, have a considerable amount of experience and am honest enough to offer good advice and realism regarding women. I'm here to damn help you guys because I feel bad for men today. Feminism has done some damage to society and interpersonal relationships and left men feeling like they're lost at sea without a life raft.

With that being said...if the men here would just stop trying to put on a phony front with the women who post here and just treat them like they do the guys there would be no need for me to make posts such as this.

 

[PYROTAK]

how about we not have these silly frivolous conversations.

its a dog eat dog world, do whatever it takes to get ahead.

you think that you wouldn't screw over someone you know, but the fact of the matter is that someone probably would screw you over given the chance.

its kinda like that cow analogy.

im a republican and i have two cows, and my neighbor has none. sucks to be him, but there is no way im giving him my cow.

 

[00Kevin]

Originally posted by Interpol


2. Some people still try to argue this site is about self-improvement rather than getting women. Whatever, guys. Self-improvement is a means to an end, that end is being succesful with women, that's why we're all here, so stop denying it.

Self improvement should never be a means to an end. You don't actually improve until you do it for yourself. I disagree with anyone that thinks that this site is promoting self improvement for the sole purpose of being successful with women. Anyone who is doing that is fooling themselves and is basically just an AFC who hasn't improved at all.

I will argue that this site is really just a wake up call. It should help a man realize that he is on the top of the food chain when it comes to women and just about every other aspect of his life.

A lot of men don't realize this and are very confused and depressed because of it. All throughout their childhood they have never been told what it means to be a man. In fact most media totally discourages men from being men. Now that I realize this I can hardly watch tv anymore. It is so feminized it makes me sick.

I think that every man should strive to be free from the chains of women. If you are a man you don't need a woman. You don't need to get married. Get yourslef to this state of mind and the women will be the ones after you. They will be the ones who want you for your strength.

All the young guys with old ideals are the ones who are successfull with women.

 

[PYROTAK]

yeah you shouldn't be improving yourself for anyone but yourself. be selfish otherwise you will quickly becomed bored of it.

i dont' work out so i get chicks attention, i work out since i love looking good .

i will not be happy until i can bench 215 at reps of 10 and 4 sets and be at 10% body fat and have a back of steeel muahahahahahaha. squat 250 and deadlift 300 muahhahahahaaaa

and then its time to set another goal and go for it.

just like how i gotta learn how to play the guitar better to be like joe satriani muahahahahaha.

meh im good enough at tennis already to ever play with my boss.

next its time to get my golf swing nice and straight at 250 yds. my chip shots more consistant! and learn how to putt proper and not like a fool.

finishing learning how to play george winston's variations on pachebels cannon and of course tchaikovsky's violin concerto.

i don' do this **** for chicks, i do this because i enjoy being an exceptional at many things. if chicks like that, thats fantastic.

i agree this place is just to wake guys up to the world and make sure that their mind is in the right place and learn some things. don't waste life being mediocre =P

well thats just my own philosophy
don't get me wrong i love the chicks too

 

[Interpol]

Originally posted by 00Kevin
Self improvement should never be a means to an end. You don't actually improve until you do it for yourself. I disagree with anyone that thinks that this site is promoting self improvement for the sole purpose of being successful with women. Anyone who is doing that is fooling themselves and is basically just an AFC who hasn't improved at all.

I never said I'm not improving for myself - I certainly am. But that doesn't change the fact that the purpose of THIS SPECIFIC FORUM is self-improvement with the end goal of being more succesful with women.

If you really want to break it down, everything in life is about self-improvement, because we all strive to move forward and better ourselves. But we don't come to THIS FORUM to get better at sports, or get a higher-paying job, or to become better writers, or any other of the myriad forms of self-improvement. We come HERE to be more succesful with women, period.

Everytime someone tries to take the focus off that and throw it on to something else, it's just diluting the relevance of the information here.

I understand when guys come here fresh off the AFC boat, the first thing they need to do is focus on motivation, what they want from theirselves, etc. But at some point, we have to remember why there is a picture of a girl in the top left corner of the screen.

I've read posts from guys who have said that as a DJ, women should have no value whatsoever to you, because you don't need them. If you truly believe that, then you might as well go become gay because you're saying you would be equally as happy if you NEVER GOT FVCKED IN YOUR LIFE. We all know this isn't true, so let's stop repeating that same tired BS.

 

[Juan_Man]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
See...this is a perfect example of why I end up posting about myself. If I get insulted and attacked I am going to respond and defend myself. For the love of Christ some of you need to wake up and smell the coffee. The very same guys that try to impress the other guys on this site by being rude and insulting to anything and everything female are the ones we all see crying in their teacups over some girl, showing insecurity and their weaknesses a few days later. Who on earth do these guys think they are fooling by fronting in such a way? Some women come here because they are interested in the subject matter, want to keep an eye on what guys are up to or like in my case, have a considerable amount of experience and am honest enough to offer good advice and realism regarding women. I'm here to damn help you guys because I feel bad for men today. Feminism has done some damage to society and interpersonal relationships and left men feeling like they're lost at sea without a life raft.

With that being said...if the men here would just stop trying to put on a phony front with the women who post here and just treat them like they do the guys there would be no need for me to make posts such as this.

I apologise, Wyldfire. My post was a bit uncalled for. I just get annoyed with girls that think they are hot sh!t because a guy wants to fvck them. This kind of sh!t was prevalent at my college. A 5 starts thinking that she's a 9 because a couple of desperate guys want to sleep with her. This has got to stop.

Anyways, getting back to the original poster. A good attitude is the only way you are going to succeed with women. AFCs are the guys that are afraid of approaching the girl they want because they can't take rejection or the ridicule that follows. Grow the fvck up!!!! Are you living a life for yourself or for other people? The game is a numbers game. The more you put yourself out there, the better your chances are of success. If you think a face like Brad Pitt or a body like Arnold is the only way to get the ladies then I feel sorry for you.

My brother is a pimp. He's goodlooking but he's no Denzel. And yes he has had his share of rejections but that doesn't stop him from pulling females left and right. Something to think about.

 

[Juan_Man]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
See...this is a perfect example of why I end up posting about myself. If I get insulted and attacked I am going to respond and defend myself. For the love of Christ some of you need to wake up and smell the coffee. The very same guys that try to impress the other guys on this site by being rude and insulting to anything and everything female are the ones we all see crying in their teacups over some girl, showing insecurity and their weaknesses a few days later. Who on earth do these guys think they are fooling by fronting in such a way? Some women come here because they are interested in the subject matter, want to keep an eye on what guys are up to or like in my case, have a considerable amount of experience and am honest enough to offer good advice and realism regarding women. I'm here to damn help you guys because I feel bad for men today. Feminism has done some damage to society and interpersonal relationships and left men feeling like they're lost at sea without a life raft.

With that being said...if the men here would just stop trying to put on a phony front with the women who post here and just treat them like they do the guys there would be no need for me to make posts such as this.

I apologise, Wyldfire. My post was a bit uncalled for. I just get annoyed with girls that think they are hot sh!t because a guy wants to fvck them. This kind of sh!t was prevalent at my college. A 5 starts thinking that she's a 9 because a couple of desperate guys want to sleep with her. This has got to stop.

Anyways, getting back to the original poster. A good attitude is the only way you are going to succeed with women. AFCs are the guys that are afraid of approaching the girl they want because they can't take rejection or the ridicule that follows. Grow the fvck up!!!! Are you living a life for yourself or for other people? The game is a numbers game. The more you put yourself out there, the better your chances are of success. If you think a face like Brad Pitt or a body like Arnold is the only way to get the ladies then I feel sorry for you.

My brother is a pimp. He's goodlooking but he's no Denzel. And yes he has had his share of rejections but that doesn't stop him from pulling females left and right. Something to think about.