There's a chance I may lose my best friend...Any help?

[Mr. Sarcasm]

Man, I'm a ****ing artist at screwing things up, it seems. Haven't been out of the hospital for two days and I'm already screwing up friendships...

Here's the situation:

Day before yesterday, I went to school for the first time after two weeks due to health problems. Yadda yadda yadda. So there's this girl I hang out with, and I'm not attracted to her, I think of her as a good friend, and she thought of me as a good friend too. Anyway, she made me mad with a comment and I walked away not telling her the reason for my anger. She afterwards said she was in a terrible state that day, since she considered that big of a friend.

Erm...yeah, being on an anger-rush, when I got home, I went online and sent her a mail that detailed EVERYTHING I didn't like about her.

Here's the mail in it's translated form:

You wanted to know why I'm mad at you? Here you go:

Reason number one: You don't respect me, as a man or as a friend, and it shows. You parade me around when you need me, but the second you get the opportunity, you undermine me, no matter the surroundings.

Reason number two: Everything I tell you, I can be sure that within an hour, the whole school will know, that pisses me off.

Reason number three: You treat me like a kid, which wouldn't irritate me if you didn't act different towards others (read: male classmates (two of em))

I don't give a **** anymore, because whether you want it or not, I'm not a toy and you will NOT treat me like one, that clear?

That's it, I guess. There's more, methinks, but I don't want to waste any more time on you.

Enjoy the rest of the day

Love, Mr. Sarcasm

...Yeah, I blame it on the adrenaline. Thing is, half of the stuff was either me pulling things out of context or imagining things.

Anyways, yesterday she apologized to me and during the day, my anger lessened. At the end of the day we had a confrontation and my mind just went into a blockade. I couldn't deal out ANYTHING, it was as if she was right and I was wrong. That simple.

Out of guilt, I wrote another mail, in which I apologized for the harshness of the other, but not for the contents.

Here's the deal, I want to apologize, but not for what I said, only for the way I said it.

While I was writing the other e-mail, I was just trying to hurt you (yes, I'm an idiot) since I was too angry. But I stand by what I said, you do treat me like a kid and that grates on my nerves.

I honestly apologize if I hurt you, but I stay with my opinion.

I just received her response.

it's like this...our relationship just went a bit cold.........
you hurtme and i can't describe how much i hate you right now.......
i told you everything yesterday....and once again....thank you...for everything......
o, yes...i'm angry....very.....
noone ever insulted me like you did......
which is why....you can say whatever you want about me....because you'rewrong

I tried to keep everything in the same style it was written.

Yeah, that's it. I really don't want to lose her as a friend, but I WON'T admit I'm wrong, especially not after the way I said all those things--

so yeah, I am in dire need for help...

 

[War Against Betaism]

You probably shouldn't have written that second email, right now I'd let things cool off, no more apologizing and no more email exchanges, just let things cool and then after a while, maybe a month, she will be all over it. The concept behind letting things cool off is that people will remember all of the good things about you when they haven't seen you in a while. So let things cool off and then talk to her again as if nothing happened.

 

[Mr. Sarcasm]

I shouldn't have written the second email, period. It only made the arguement I was stressing sound cheaper.

But hey, it's easy being smart after everything is said and done, thing is...it's useless then XO

 

[KontrollerX]

Yeah you shouldn't of sent that second letter of apology.

What you said to her the first time you should of stood by if thats the way you really felt.

Anyway every now and again I think Penkitten posts a good piece of advice someone once told her and I think it goes like this...

"Never apologize for someone elses mistakes".

Your friend fvcked up in the way she treated you or else you wouldn't of been that angry at her.

She doesn't have the right to be angry at you now for pointing out her poor treatment of you but you just enabled her to be angry with that pitiful apology letter which puts the power over the entire situation back in her court.

Seriously us guys while in a self destructive AFC mentality of viewing women as poor little victims can be fvcking stupid at times because we think oh no we've crushed the poor little innocent flower with our righteous anger when no she can tolerate righteous anger just the same as a guy friend of ours who fvcks up.

Women are stronger than we think.

 

[Mr. Sarcasm]

As for letting things cool off...

I see her every day, as she goes to the same class I do.

 

[War Against Betaism]

Just ignore her then, tell her you don't really wanna see her anymore, as a friend of course.

 

[Mr. Sarcasm]

Hmmm, I'll try.

 

[Mr. Sarcasm]

So, I went to school today.

She asked me if I checked the mail, I replied yes while only briefly glancing at her. She then asked me "What, so you're not talking to me now?" I said, "Where'd you get that from?" And concentrated on schoolwork.

Later, a friend of mine (female too) came over to my desk with her and asked us whether we made up, I smiled and replied no. Then she started to talk about the email and I told em about how I almost started laugh when I read it. She grinned weakly.

During the day, I noticed her looking at me quite often.

Well, that's all f'r t'day...

 

[War Against Betaism]

It sounds like you're getting the results that you want, it may not appear that way but you're making her realize what she is missing out on.

 

[Pdizzzzzzle]

Show her your the alpha male.

 

[Conquer]

You don't have to explain a damn thing bro. When ever a man reveals emotions there are repercussions. So pick your emotions wisely next time. No chick friend is worth putting up with. Trust me

 

[Mr. Sarcasm]

So yeah.

Today, there was supposed to be a students strike, so fourteen of us ditched school. In the end, there wasn't a strike so we all got ****ed, but oh well.

Anyway, at the beginning, when we were supposed to meet up at a cafe, she was surprised when I showed up, when I asked why, with a weak smile, she replied: "Well, because you're angry at me..." Well, seems she forgot that she was s'posed to be angry at me or something. So I replied "You thought I wouldn't show up because I'm angry at you? Not everything revolves around you, y'know..."

Anyway, after a seat next to me freed up, she took it, rested her head against my shoulders a couple of times, but I ignored her.

Then, we went to the mall, sat in a cafe, where I ordered some coffee and a sandwich. She asked for a bite, I let her. Eh, yeah. Then, an arcade was nearby, the girls practically robbed me, her included. "Can you pay for this?""Lend me a couple of bucks"

I felt like a tool, but oh well...

 

[War Against Betaism]

Well other than that last part at the cafe and arcade, you did a pretty good job and it is pretty evident seeing the results. I think by now you can start opening up more little by little, just don't let incidents at the arcade happen again

 

[Mr. Sarcasm]

I know, but well, when you get 13 hawt girls begging for something...it's kinda hard to say no, ESPECIALLY if you're a teenager.