What if an AFC sat down and pondered directly the question,
How does one attract women?
Well, most of them would reply, “the nicer the better”. You can’t blame them, every movie they’ve ever watched taught them that way.
To tell the truth, even asking the question is something removed from AFC-ness; for somewhere in his heart AFC doesn’t believe a women could feel that sort of feeling for him, and so he focuses on how to “trick” or convince a women into liking him with gifts and compliments, chat-up lines, whatever. Even more advanced seducers have this mindset. They use patterns, negs, lines, whatever new technology they can get their hands on.
That is the AFC’s first mistake: believing a woman cannot feel attracted to him. In words it seems stupid (it is), but this is what all AFCs secretly feel.
Part of this may be simple insecurity. The other part is a little easier to solve: a warped perspective. If an AFC asked how to attract a woman, he’d think of everything that attracts him to a woman: looks, looks, looks, looks, looks, looks, class, femininity, looks. Therefore, he decides that not being Brad Pitt, the girls he wants are “out of his league”. This is an AFC’s second mistake: not knowing how women work.
In fact, men, like women, can be attracted to things other than looks -- however, his sex life consisting of monthly centrefolds and porn sites, AFC wouldn’t know. Not knowing how attraction works then.
If he really thought about it, he would realise that supplication isn’t attractive to him or anyone else. He’d realise that everyone wants someone FUN, POSITIVE, who’s a CHALLENGE, a MYSTERY, EXCITING.
And if he could get into a women’s skin, he’d realise that women want MASCULINE men, want to feel PROTECTED, want to feel loved. That every women’s goal is to find a guy who they can love and who’ll love them back unconditionally. And he’d realise that his masculinity is something a woman finds attractive, even though he obviously doesn’t.
Men aren’t attracted to masculinity. Masculinity repels masculinity – it’s a bit like magnets, but with the difference that femininity doesn’t repel femininity; it’s neutral. Hence women hug each other all the time and hold hands, when men don’t. (David DeAngelo did a test where his audience all stared into each other’s eyes: the men felt “weird” and uncomfortable staring into men’s eyes, but felt powerful staring into women’s eyes. And we all know how eye contact attracts women, check the DJ Bible*). The AFC doesn’t realise that women react to masculinity in the opposite way that he does. He might have heard about the difference between men and women and he might have a better or worse idea about it, but although he might know, he doesn’t feel the difference between men and women. So he thinks his masculinity will repel or “oppress” (thanks Feminism) women, and does his best to act asexual whenever he’s with a woman.
In fact, he doesn’t look for other things that might be attractive to make up for what he doesn’t have. Why? He might not see them. However, more importantly, by this time he’s given up. He’s not trying to get a girl, he’s trying to find an excuse to make it okay for him not to have a girl. This is an AFC’s last fatal mistake: getting set in his ways.
*I'm thinking on doing a more extensive survey on this. (Get men, women and mixed pairs to stare at each other's eyes, and with information on their sexuality, note the reactions they experience).
(Note to self: stop getting off track)
How does one attract women?
Well, most of them would reply, “the nicer the better”. You can’t blame them, every movie they’ve ever watched taught them that way.
To tell the truth, even asking the question is something removed from AFC-ness; for somewhere in his heart AFC doesn’t believe a women could feel that sort of feeling for him, and so he focuses on how to “trick” or convince a women into liking him with gifts and compliments, chat-up lines, whatever. Even more advanced seducers have this mindset. They use patterns, negs, lines, whatever new technology they can get their hands on.
That is the AFC’s first mistake: believing a woman cannot feel attracted to him. In words it seems stupid (it is), but this is what all AFCs secretly feel.
Part of this may be simple insecurity. The other part is a little easier to solve: a warped perspective. If an AFC asked how to attract a woman, he’d think of everything that attracts him to a woman: looks, looks, looks, looks, looks, looks, class, femininity, looks. Therefore, he decides that not being Brad Pitt, the girls he wants are “out of his league”. This is an AFC’s second mistake: not knowing how women work.
In fact, men, like women, can be attracted to things other than looks -- however, his sex life consisting of monthly centrefolds and porn sites, AFC wouldn’t know. Not knowing how attraction works then.
If he really thought about it, he would realise that supplication isn’t attractive to him or anyone else. He’d realise that everyone wants someone FUN, POSITIVE, who’s a CHALLENGE, a MYSTERY, EXCITING.
And if he could get into a women’s skin, he’d realise that women want MASCULINE men, want to feel PROTECTED, want to feel loved. That every women’s goal is to find a guy who they can love and who’ll love them back unconditionally. And he’d realise that his masculinity is something a woman finds attractive, even though he obviously doesn’t.
Men aren’t attracted to masculinity. Masculinity repels masculinity – it’s a bit like magnets, but with the difference that femininity doesn’t repel femininity; it’s neutral. Hence women hug each other all the time and hold hands, when men don’t. (David DeAngelo did a test where his audience all stared into each other’s eyes: the men felt “weird” and uncomfortable staring into men’s eyes, but felt powerful staring into women’s eyes. And we all know how eye contact attracts women, check the DJ Bible*). The AFC doesn’t realise that women react to masculinity in the opposite way that he does. He might have heard about the difference between men and women and he might have a better or worse idea about it, but although he might know, he doesn’t feel the difference between men and women. So he thinks his masculinity will repel or “oppress” (thanks Feminism) women, and does his best to act asexual whenever he’s with a woman.
In fact, he doesn’t look for other things that might be attractive to make up for what he doesn’t have. Why? He might not see them. However, more importantly, by this time he’s given up. He’s not trying to get a girl, he’s trying to find an excuse to make it okay for him not to have a girl. This is an AFC’s last fatal mistake: getting set in his ways.
*I'm thinking on doing a more extensive survey on this. (Get men, women and mixed pairs to stare at each other's eyes, and with information on their sexuality, note the reactions they experience).
(Note to self: stop getting off track)
