The SMS thing gets on my nerves

[Challenger]

The damn SMS thing gets on my nerves. I have at the moment just 2 women who I date but unfortunetaly both of them have my mobile nummer . . .

Women in general don't seem to have the courage to ring you (if you don't know them well) but they have guilty conscience about SMS you all the time . . .

I have told both of them cleary (!) that I don't like the SMS thing, jus for setting up meetings or so.

But they want to talk talk talk , have a discusion just by this little messages, which is: expensive, ineffective (no romance in it), costs a lot of time and just gets on my nerves ...

So probabyl I am going to tell the next girl I meet that I don't have an mobile . . . even though if she finds out I have she thinks I am a lyer ...

The basic problem is:You have your mobile around you all the time and you get the messages at once. There is no chance like you have with mail to just not check it for a few days.

So does anybody has an advice for this situation or has the same problem ?

 

[Ser_i]

once the first message comes in, I don't respond for a day or 2.. then call them up and say something like:

I won't reply to sms' it's to time consuming, don't get me wrong, but I barely have time to have a conversation over the phone, not to think about writing down an entire story with the short message system.


it might be a bit negative and all, but it certainly brings over the message

 

[MrNiceGuy]

a friend of mine, she gets free SMS messages with her phone contract type thing, so basically whenever she contacts me.. (which isn't that often) its always by text..

It annoys me a bit, I'd much rather have a conversation over the phone with her, but its always texts that she sends me if ever she wants to tell me something or arrange something.

I try not to contact her too often but the thing is now, that our little SMS conversations have become so much like the protocol of communication of our friendship (when we're not face to face) that if I initiate contact, phoning her and not SMSing her seems like a big deal. So now if I do contact her I just end up SMSing her.. when obviously I'd much rather speak to her.

I guess I should do like ser_i says and just let her know that I much prefer talking over the phone. If I just start phoning most of the time from now on then it won't seem like such a big deal. And apart from everything else its cheaper for me than SMSing, even if it isn't for her.

The other thing to remember with texts tho, is that you can get away with not replying or even ignoring them for a while.. there are plenty of excuses.. your battery was flat, you left your phone at home, you were somewhere with no signal, or just claim the network was screwed up and you didnt get the message till 5 hours later, (this does happen sometimes)

 

[Lone_raider]

Yeah I don't know what the deal is with girls and SMS? I've got about 30 on my phone from one girl! She's to afraid to call me up sometimes I guess, so she takes the womenly passive route of sending a text message if she wants to meet me, or tell me something. And man, sometimes she types out a novel which I have to scroll down 3 or 4 times to read!!! What's the deal? lol

 

[echo1212]

I would refer you to this post for a complete discussion of texting and just how lame it is.

http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?threadid=31341

 

[DreamyChick]

I have to agree with you guys. I don't like text messaging for those same reasons. It's much more personal and helpful to hear the person's voice.

I have a question dealing with a guy and what my move should be? Okay he and I exchanged numbers last week bc he wanted to hang out and I told myself I would wait a week to call him, but in the meantime he texts me three days later. So I call him instead of texting a reply. He was drunk having just come back from a bar but almost immediately asked when we are going to hang out and was all you have to let me know a day in advance bc I go day by day, and I was trying to ask when was good for him but he wasnt focused so I gave up.

The next day I im him just to see how he's feeling. Kept it short. Then its the weekend. He told me that he had plans to go out of town but he was online. I again kept the convo brief asking what happened to his plans. I told him I was just about to go lay out and say if his plans don't work out to give me a call later and he tells me hes planning to go later, but to call him if I get bored. I don't call.

I finally call the next day Sunday bc I haven't called him too much etc. This would be the second call. So hes friendly on the phone says he's hanging with friends where he goes to college about 85 miles away. We chat about the summer and he tells me about his job and mentions that hes close to being considered and assistant manager. Then after about 7 minutes he says well I need to let you go my friend's giving me the evil eye. So we say our gbs.

I haven't heard from him since last sunday. So what should my move be, as far as he's considered I assume this is normal for a guy, but do you see any fallacies so far where I could have gone wrong. I know IM communication bad, but for the past few days I have resisted the urge to contact over IM. Is it safe to assume hes still interested in getting together?

Help would be appreciated.

 

[MrNiceGuy]

Take everything I'm about to say with a pinch of salt this is just my take on things, I could be completely wrong..

When you contacted him on IM you should have brought up arranging to meet I reckon.. he was the one who raised it first so its no shame in reminding him of that... the main problem is him going to college so far away.

Anyway, my next move would be to phone him and try and sort something out to meet ask him his plans.. if he keeps fobbing you off (then hes probly not interested) just tell him to call you when he thinks he can see you and leave it to him to make contact.

---------

Back to the SMS topic, I was bored today, and as most of my friends where busy I decided I wanted to hang with this chick I mentioned before.. so I SMSed her saying I was bored did she want to meet me in town.. she replied saying she was really hungover and couldnt think about moving.
So the I thought I have 3 options I can either continue having a tedious sms conversation about why she's hungover that will probably go over, I can leave her message as the end of the contact or I can take the bull by the horns and call her...

So I phoned her.. had a bit of a chat about her night out.. then I moaned saying I was bored, she should come meet me and she'd feel better if she got up, she said no I'm not moving but feel free to come to my place to watch tv/videos if you want. So I did, if I'd not phoned her I'd have got nowhere. I've just decided from now on.. If I can do it easier by phoning or I feel like talking to her I'm just gonna phone, no more of this SMS crap unless its something small and trivial..

 

[DreamyChick]

Thanks Mr.Nice Guy.

I just called and left a message on his cell, whatever happens now is in his hands. I am not going to worry about it.

PS Guys please stop texting girls and phone them. It's quicker and it's easier to make a judgement based on the girl's interest.