PrinceCharming
Senior Don Juan
This is something I realized a few weeks ago, and I'd like your thoughts on it. It seems to me that the labels "jerk" or "nice guy" don't really mean anything. What matters is the intention that you put behind your approach. The actual approach is simply a reflection of your intention.
Say for example you see a hot girl and think "hmmm, I wonder what she'd be like in bed" Then you approach her with the intention of getting her into bed. Your approach will be the same as the approach when you approach a girl to ask for the time, but the intention is going to make the whole thing important to you, and make you nervous or stubborn, something that is decided by your personality.
It seems like the intention somehow exposes itself every time. If you are careful about the words that you say, your body language will give it away for you. Some people are really good actors and have learned to hide their intention even with a behavior so unconscious as body language. Whenver you are feeling nervous, and thinking "it's okay It'll pass with practice" then you haven't examined your intention.
This is why AFCs or nice guys get nowhere with women. Because all of their "nice" behavior has the intention of getting women in bed, by buying them with dinners, movies etc. You can still do those things with a different intention and they'll have a different meaning. Now the reason why jerks seem successful in the beginning is mostly due to the fact that women are so tired of these "nice guys" that they'll do anything to have something different.
So the jerk's real intention is covered for the time being. But not for all women. Only the frustrated ones, which so happens to be the hottest ones. Why? Because they are the ones that get hit on all the time by "nice guys" whose tactics and intentions are completely transparent. Yet jerks hurt women emotionally too, since thier intention was also to get them in bed as well, and then leave them. I want to show you how frustration and intention are linked together. The middle letter in AFC stands for Frustrated. Frustration is a byproduct of having the intention of getting women in bed with you, and not achieving it. The reason why jerks are not frustrated is because they have no problem getting sex.
Somehow, the first time they tried to score, they found the right woman, and their approach combined with her frustration, to give him sex. Then he developed an eye for that particular kind of a woman and scored almost each time. The nice guy instead, used the wrong approach - being nice - and it didn't work. after the third or fourth time, frustration developed. However intention is very unconscious. We don't even know what it is, and some of us never know what it is. It is a decision to do things a particular way. Sometimes I even think I know what mine is, and try to change it ahead of time. Yet I'm not really changing it. I think I am, but somehow it reverts back to the original one.
Some guys only really change their intention towards women, after they have been successful for some time and know for sure they can get any girl they want. Then it becomes what it should have been from the very beginning. It is a status only few guys experience. Once in that status, they are neither jerks, nor nice guys. They are men with a purpose other than getting laid. Life takes a whole new meaning. Now as I said, I'm not sure how to change one's intention. It is possible to project the intentions that you want to project, but it seems that for many guys it is the circumstances that contgrol their intention, and not them. Maybe if you became aware of it while doing an approach, and then simply decided to have another one in place, it could work.
Say for example you see a hot girl and think "hmmm, I wonder what she'd be like in bed" Then you approach her with the intention of getting her into bed. Your approach will be the same as the approach when you approach a girl to ask for the time, but the intention is going to make the whole thing important to you, and make you nervous or stubborn, something that is decided by your personality.
It seems like the intention somehow exposes itself every time. If you are careful about the words that you say, your body language will give it away for you. Some people are really good actors and have learned to hide their intention even with a behavior so unconscious as body language. Whenver you are feeling nervous, and thinking "it's okay It'll pass with practice" then you haven't examined your intention.
This is why AFCs or nice guys get nowhere with women. Because all of their "nice" behavior has the intention of getting women in bed, by buying them with dinners, movies etc. You can still do those things with a different intention and they'll have a different meaning. Now the reason why jerks seem successful in the beginning is mostly due to the fact that women are so tired of these "nice guys" that they'll do anything to have something different.
So the jerk's real intention is covered for the time being. But not for all women. Only the frustrated ones, which so happens to be the hottest ones. Why? Because they are the ones that get hit on all the time by "nice guys" whose tactics and intentions are completely transparent. Yet jerks hurt women emotionally too, since thier intention was also to get them in bed as well, and then leave them. I want to show you how frustration and intention are linked together. The middle letter in AFC stands for Frustrated. Frustration is a byproduct of having the intention of getting women in bed with you, and not achieving it. The reason why jerks are not frustrated is because they have no problem getting sex.
Somehow, the first time they tried to score, they found the right woman, and their approach combined with her frustration, to give him sex. Then he developed an eye for that particular kind of a woman and scored almost each time. The nice guy instead, used the wrong approach - being nice - and it didn't work. after the third or fourth time, frustration developed. However intention is very unconscious. We don't even know what it is, and some of us never know what it is. It is a decision to do things a particular way. Sometimes I even think I know what mine is, and try to change it ahead of time. Yet I'm not really changing it. I think I am, but somehow it reverts back to the original one.
Some guys only really change their intention towards women, after they have been successful for some time and know for sure they can get any girl they want. Then it becomes what it should have been from the very beginning. It is a status only few guys experience. Once in that status, they are neither jerks, nor nice guys. They are men with a purpose other than getting laid. Life takes a whole new meaning. Now as I said, I'm not sure how to change one's intention. It is possible to project the intentions that you want to project, but it seems that for many guys it is the circumstances that contgrol their intention, and not them. Maybe if you became aware of it while doing an approach, and then simply decided to have another one in place, it could work.
