The Freindzone

Bingo-Player

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I see a lot of posts here about guys wanting to get out of the "freindzone" but wouldn't it be better if we talked about avoiding it completely ?

personally im not sure wtf you would even do to get in there , in the first place !?!

men and women are biologically supposed to want eachother and not in a friendly way........

the male must be acting seriously feminine for a woman to place him in the freindzone......
 

Vivacity

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the male must be acting seriously feminine for a woman to place him in the freindzone......
Not the only, but could be one of the reasons. Mostly people get into friend zone because they lack the traits a woman desires in a man or lack the characteristics she sees in her long-term partner.

If you look clean, attractive, and sexy (aka, fukcable), can she put you in the friend zone? If you have the desirable traits of a man such as knowledge, intellect, financial stability, etc. to go along with cleanliness, attractiveness, and sexiness, can she put you in the friend zone?

Can any man put Scarlett Johansson, Charlize Theron, young Sharon Stone in the friend zone?




 

TheMonkeyKing

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Haa. Have you seen the state of Sharon Stone these days?? She wouldn't even make it to the friend zone.

Regards the OP. I think it's always easy to assume that a guy is doing something wrong. Where probably, at least half the time, it's a sh!t test that most will fail. It's a woman's prerogative. So what. I see it as a challenge. I've been friend-zoned by dozens of girls who clearly didn't really mean it; funny how now I'm a bit older and they see my value is going up, they come back around. My guess is that it's a defense mechanism a lot of the time. But granted, guys must just not be up to standards or behaving erratically for 40% of cases.
 

El Payaso

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You only get into the friend zone if you allow it. If she tries to friend you, you tell her to piss off. Metamorphorically speaking, of course.
 

Dhoulmagus

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The friendzone is just a crybaby term for a spoiled beta male. Nobody complains about the friendzone until they want the girl. Sorry, not every girl is going to be sexually attracted to you. Get the **** over it and grow up.
 

dude99

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Haa. Have you seen the state of Sharon Stone these days?? She wouldn't even make it to the friend zone.

Regards the OP. I think it's always easy to assume that a guy is doing something wrong. Where probably, at least half the time, it's a sh!t test that most will fail. It's a woman's prerogative. So what. I see it as a challenge. I've been friend-zoned by dozens of girls who clearly didn't really mean it; funny how now I'm a bit older and they see my value is going up, they come back around. My guess is that it's a defense mechanism a lot of the time. But granted, guys must just not be up to standards or behaving erratically for 40% of cases.

Anyone else find that facebook has brought back dozens of girls that friend zoned you years ago...now suddenly they see your value and want something from you? I find the newly seperated or divorced women suddenly wanting to reconnect.
 

Poon King

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The friend zone is a CHOICE that pathetic men make out of desperation for female attention and validation. Its a form of settling and its extremely beta.

If a woman will not give you the type of relationship you want to have with her.. she is basically showing you that she is not on the same page. So why would you stick around? Use that time and energy to meet and f*ck other women.

The only exception is if the woman has hot friends OR if she is playing hard to get. In that case.. give her some extra time. But if she holds firm on being friends AND you can't f*ck any of her hot friends.. take a walk. Your time is valuable.
 

Vivacity

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Haa. Have you seen the state of Sharon Stone these days?? She wouldn't even make it to the friend zone.
I would still tap that, purely because of the incredible God-given bone structure she was born with.
 

TheMonkeyKing

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@dude99

I have always had a lot of female acquaintances. I work in the health sector so pretty much 90% female. I can't complain. I've friend-zoned a load more than have friend-zoned me. The thing is, it doesn't really bother me. If there's a girl I want and she doesn't want the same, pfft, I just ignore her until she does. Sometimes they never do, pfft. Who cares, maybe one day they will bite.

Facebook is a feeding frenzy for the female imperative and beta orbiters alike. In the last while I have noticed a lot more old flames, 'friends' and random women adding, liking, messaging out of the blue. I have at least 20 women liking my profile picture etc. And most of them are not bad looking. It's quite good social proof actually.

It's like they're saying, 'This one is ripe now'. Again not complaining. For fck sake, I literally have married women coming out of my ears at the moment, figuratively speaking. Some random bint added me the other day, I have no idea who she is, pretty sure I've never met her before and have no mutual friends. Clearly married, two kids..... I just don't know where women get off. I mean I am extremely eligible, but there is just no sense of loyalty whatsoever.

@Poon King

I think it's easy to harp back to the early days of game and see everything as black and white. It's fair to say that game has moved on since the days of Strauss et al. I picked up an old copy of 'The Game' recently and just thought how old fashioned it is. A lot of that stuff wouldn't work any more and women even employ those strategies themselves. That's not to directly criticise our esteemed predecessors, they did the human race a great services with their early teachings.

Sure, a massive beta who has never been laid and is a white knight feminist with the intent of banging his 'friend' is simply naive and kidding himself. His 'friend' is also taking him for a ride, using him for attention and other non-sexual favours, for sure.

However, for a successful man, it is possible to have female friends and in fact work the situation to his benefit. The secret for me is agree and amplify. No point being butthurt about it. Though I'm not particularly proud of the fact, and try to avoid it these days, I have lost count of the number of 'friends' I have had sexual encounters with. It's a lot anyway. Though complications and drama can easily ensue, so best avoided in the long run.

As I say, if some bird friend-zones me, it's a challenge, rather than a rejection. I'd say one in two of them wants to be more than friends really. Like all challenges in life, it's about perception. As the old cliche goes, problems are just opportunities in disguise.


I give you the except from my 2016 Journey; a philosophy on the friend-zone I realised over the last while....

*The Benefits with Friends Zone*

As mentioned in March, I had a slight epiphany about the whole friend-zoning thing and why it is sometimes being immediately dumped in the friend-zone is not always the terrible thing. It can be re-worked in favour of the friend; as the old theory goes - 'agree and amplify'. I have dubbed this phenomena, The Benefits with Friend Zone.

Being in the friend-zone can afford many and varied benefits; those being time (to escalate), the access to other women (her girlfriends), practice time, social proof (when you socialise) and female insight. A skill that many men lack is the ability to think like a woman (that, by the way is very different to ACTING like a woman) . Ask yourself how many women you have seduced by drinking beer and chatting football with your mates. My guess is, not too many.

Women will friend-zone a bloke for one and rarely more than one of the following three reasons:

1) Don't like you AT ALL (sexually)
2) Don't know if they like you or not yet
3) Know they like you already and will fall in love very quickly; the friend-zoning is merely a feeble temporary, measure of self preservation. Probably she's been dumped and/or heart-broken in the past and this is protection at least in the short term, but she's already attracted to you on more than one level. This is where you enter the Benefit's with Friends Zone - 'agree and amplify'. An example of this is how this older married woman initially approached me - she later told me she knew exactly what she wanted from the outset (i.e. me).

Now, in order to realise the benefits, one must be at least be in the second group there. And you must be savvy enough to decipher which group of 'friends' you are in. I'm not going to go on about this, but long story short, just because a woman tells you she only sees you as a friend, there's no reason to necessarily believe her and automatically assume disqualification. She may in fact be using it, so you disqualify yourself. A little persistence pays. Pursuing what you want is not only flattering to her, but proves your worth as well; shows you don't fold at the first test. Observation of her behaviour after the fact is what is key - immediate nexting after being friend-zoned may result in a loss, because of impatience.

Two requirements for this to be worthwhile:

A) There has to have been decent ground work laid to bother continuing in the faux 'friend-zone'. Flirtation, indicators of interest, physical contacts and weak resistances should be flowing. As described, one must have a fairly decent idea of being in Friend-zone 2, borderline zone 3 and know that it will take only a little more time/effort to cross the finish line.

B) Once in the friend-zone, the 'friend' must not waver from the flirtation/personality from before the zoning, and should push-pull escalate. Being in the zone pertains to the zoner liking the flirtation and wanting it to escalate at least in part .

4) The Fourth and final term upon which friend-zone is applied, is when a man friend-zones a woman FIRST. The benefits are seen in the story of 'Skittles Man'. I am definitely going to be trying this approach.
 
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Casillas

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Most men follow the easy way and start hanging out with the girls as their friends so they cant reject them to easy, but they forgot to flirt and all that stuff and suddenly they realize that they're are trapped in the Friend zone.

In conclusion avoid being that kind of man, and make clear from the beginning your intentions with her.
 

Poon King

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@Poon King

I think it's easy to harp back to the early days of game and see everything as black and white. It's fair to say that game has moved on since the days of Strauss et al. I picked up an old copy of 'The Game' recently and just thought how old fashioned it is. A lot of that stuff wouldn't work any more and women even employ those strategies themselves. That's not to directly criticise our esteemed predecessors, they did the human race a great services with their early teachings.

Sure, a massive beta who has never been laid and is a white knight feminist with the intent of banging his 'friend' is simply naive and kidding himself. His 'friend' is also taking him for a ride, using him for attention and other non-sexual favours, for sure.

However, for a successful man, it is possible to have female friends and in fact work the situation to his benefit. The secret for me is agree and amplify. No point being butthurt about it. Though I'm not particularly proud of the fact, and try to avoid it these days, I have lost count of the number of 'friends' I have had sexual encounters with. It's a lot anyway. Though complications and drama can easily ensue, so best avoided in the long run.

As I say, if some bird friend-zones me, it's a challenge, rather than a rejection. I'd say one in two of them wants to be more than friends really. Like all challenges in life, it's about perception. As the old cliche goes, problems are just opportunities in disguise.


I give you the except from my 2016 Journey; a philosophy on the friend-zone I realised over the last while....

*The Benefits with Friends Zone*

As mentioned in March, I had a slight epiphany about the whole friend-zoning thing and why it is sometimes being immediately dumped in the friend-zone is not always the terrible thing. It can be re-worked in favour of the friend; as the old theory goes - 'agree and amplify'. I have dubbed this phenomena, The Benefits with Friend Zone.

Being in the friend-zone can afford many and varied benefits; those being time (to escalate), the access to other women (her girlfriends), practice time, social proof (when you socialise) and female insight. A skill that many men lack is the ability to think like a woman (that, by the way is very different to ACTING like a woman) . Ask yourself how many women you have seduced by drinking beer and chatting football with your mates. My guess is, not too many.

Women will friend-zone a bloke for one and rarely more than one of the following three reasons:

1) Don't like you AT ALL (sexually)
2) Don't know if they like you or not yet
3) Know they like you already and will fall in love very quickly; the friend-zoning is merely a feeble temporary, measure of self preservation. Probably she's been dumped and/or heart-broken in the past and this is protection at least in the short term, but she's already attracted to you on more than one level. This is where you enter the Benefit's with Friends Zone - 'agree and amplify'. An example of this is how this older married woman initially approached me - she later told me she knew exactly what she wanted from the outset (i.e. me).

Now, in order to realise the benefits, one must be at least be in the second group there. And you must be savvy enough to decipher which group of 'friends' you are in. I'm not going to go on about this, but long story short, just because a woman tells you she only sees you as a friend, there's no reason to necessarily believe her and automatically assume disqualification. She may in fact be using it, so you disqualify yourself. A little persistence pays. Pursuing what you want is not only flattering to her, but proves your worth as well; shows you don't fold at the first test. Observation of her behaviour after the fact is what is key - immediate nexting after being friend-zoned may result in a loss, because of impatience.

Two requirements for this to be worthwhile:

A) There has to have been decent ground work laid to bother continuing in the faux 'friend-zone'. Flirtation, indicators of interest, physical contacts and weak resistances should be flowing. As described, one must have a fairly decent idea of being in Friend-zone 2, borderline zone 3 and know that it will take only a little more time/effort to cross the finish line.

B) Once in the friend-zone, the 'friend' must not waver from the flirtation/personality from before the zoning, and should push-pull escalate. Being in the zone pertains to the zoner liking the flirtation and wanting it to escalate at least in part .

4) The Fourth and final term upon which friend-zone is applied, is when a man friend-zones a woman FIRST. The benefits are seen in the story of 'Skittles Man'. I am definitely going to be trying this approach.
You are correct that a friendzoning is not always a true friendzoning. You are also correct that everything is not black and white. Men need to make a judgement call based on the unique situation.

This is why I said to give the woman extra time in SOME cases when you know there is obvious attraction but the woman doesn't want to look slutty or easy. But every relationship with a woman must pass the cost/benefit analysis. This means you must be happy with the relationship and it must be on terms you agree with. As long as the benefits of the "friendship" exceed the costs.. there is no problem. However, this is rarely the case with women you are not sleeping with but want to sleep with.

Any man who is in a relationship where the woman dictates all the terms is a pathetic beta.
 

DiegoSantori

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I see a lot of posts here about guys wanting to get out of the "freindzone" but wouldn't it be better if we talked about avoiding it completely ?
The best way to avoid it is to tell her "I just got out of a bad friendship and I'm not looking for new friends right now."
 

TheMonkeyKing

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You are correct that a friendzoning is not always a true friendzoning. You are also correct that everything is not black and white. Men need to make a judgement call based on the unique situation.

This is why I said to give the woman extra time in SOME cases when you know there is obvious attraction but the woman doesn't want to look slutty or easy. But every relationship with a woman must pass the cost/benefit analysis. This means you must be happy with the relationship and it must be on terms you agree with. As long as the benefits of the "friendship" exceed the costs.. there is no problem. However, this is rarely the case with women you are not sleeping with but want to sleep with.

Any man who is in a relationship where the woman dictates all the terms is a pathetic beta.

Well absolutely. I never said that I allow myself to be taken for a ride. I think we are on a similar page.

Classically 'friend-zoning' harps back to the imperative that being 'friends' necessarily means anything more than that. It's largely the fault of weak men who don't understand their own conditioning. No wonder some people exploit the situation.
 

TheMonkeyKing

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Rejection #1: She acted strange/low-interest when I number-closed on Wednesday.
I mean, this is huge. It seems this is the point at which most men are oblivious and miss blindingly obvious low interest. The initial meeting and exchange, wherever and however it comes about is highly indicative of how things will transpire in the future. Thing is, when a man is faced with a woman for the first time, panic sets in, so he is not concentrating on her behaviours, which he should be. We are screening them just as much as they are screening us.

It doesn't surprise me that the following encounters went the way they did. I had a similar experience with a barmaid the other week. Seemed fairly dissinterested at the time, ended up sending a few texts back and forth the next week, but there was clearly a level of mutual dissinterest. Why bother continuing; no point being annoyed at her - she can't help not being attracted to you. And you can't project your attraction on to her.

As is always said, when a woman is really interested, it won't be difficult. She'll make it easy for you.
 

3agle 3yes

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The REAL problem here isn't being friendzoned, it's just that the mindsets of most men when it comes to sexual relationships are wrong.

When meeting an attractive woman, most men begin immediately making the attempt to get the woman to like them.

Getting women to like you isn't the same as getting women to feel attracted to you.

Getting women to like you involves being friendly, which means never disagreeing, mostly giving compliments, trying to help her out with her issues, doing things for her and "getting to know her".

Getting women to feel attracted to you involves mostly being different to most men she knows (i.e. her male friends). Which usually means provoking her (in a mostly playful way) in order to spark chemistry. This includes disagreeing with her when you have a different point of view, putting HER in the friendzone (playfully), no compliments unless they're genuine, not getting involved with her issues and generally not caring whether she likes you or not.

It's no wonder that the former puts men into the friendzone.

When you want to get involved with a woman concentrate on building attraction...I'm sick of this "low interest" bs that's recently become popular in this forum. Too many men prioritise physical sex over having chemistry with a woman...if there is no sexual rapport/chemistry the physical sex will be sh!t anyway. If you talk with a woman you just met and you feel there is no sexual rapport/chemistry within ten minutes WALK AWAY, prioritise chemistry above all else.
 
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LiveFreeX

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Who cares what women think? The reason you get friend zoned is because you do. As a married man, I have to be really careful with the women I speak to because getting friend zoned is nearly impossible for me. When you don't give a sh1t about what women think, they fall all over themselves to be around you. You could dress up like a clown and carry around a pokeball and a tamgotchi and as long as you are not willing to put up with her sh1t, she'll pave the way to her pvssy.
 
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