Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

//The Chronicles of BPH\\

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
You nearly achieved this with a 90 notch count at present. The fact that you've had sex 90 women is more women than you could have imagined seducing back in 2011.
Upon re-reading the post I actually cringed at the part where a goal was "sex with anything that moves"...

I know a lot of guys who have the "any hole's the goal" mentality, and I cannot understand it...if I don't find the woman attractive, why would I want to f*** her?

Anyway, it's been about a month since my last post here and I'd rather ask these 2 questions here than one of the other subs that almost nobody reads.

8/11/2023

Alright so the first question is more straightforward so I'll ask it first:

Guys, do you shave/trim your armpits? I never really gave it much thought, but some people commented on it when I post my Instagram workout videos and I'm wondering if leaving them unkept is what I should be doing. I mean I don't know how I'd measure whether it's "bushy", but it's definitely there - not poking out the front when I have my arms at my sides or anything, but I don't know...what's the norm with this?

Now for the second question, this is in reference to the guy with the flooring business that I started working sales for. I'll try to itemize things here to see what you all think because I want to know if these things are normal. So far this business has been very disorganized and "shoot-from-the-hip", so I'm hanging on by a thread when it comes to putting my effort into this as a way to make money and improve my situation. I don't want to paint this in a bad light for validation, but I do want objective opinions, so I'll try to state all this the best I can:

  • I make 20% commission on jobs that put down their deposit with a $2,000 minimum for us to come out, with an average job being around $3,000. I've been doing this for about a month and so far I only have a couple of leads that I'm nurturing for myself. I shadowed him for a few jobs and he split the 20% commission with me so I would get 10%. This has come out to be $240 thus far.
  • We don't really seem to have a "range" as far as what jobs we won't take at a distance. One of our sales guys lives down near the beach, which is about 2 hours away, and gets some decent work down there. He was out of town this weekend and there were 2 leads he wanted me to do down there that I wasn't willing to spend my whole day doing. I argued that it was too far just to go down and do an estimate on a garage and a screened-in porch, to which he argues that he was trying to help me make money by giving me leads that he thinks are going to be slam dunks (we have a high close rate with the older folks at their beach houses), and that he can't think of anything else where I can make a couple hundred dollars for a few hours of my time. It's worth noting that he reimburses for gas so that expense wouldn't be on, just the time requirement.
  • As far as the rest of the team; he himself has slept through estimates he scheduled that he had to reschedule, forgot about appointments a few times, one of his sales guys couldn't deliver his materials to do the appointment because he was hungover, and one particular morning he asked me to drive down an hour to deliver him a tub of material when I had told him the night before about an estimate he and I were supposed to do together. His proposal was that I push that appointment back, and offered me $50 to bring him the can - I declined and went and did the estimate by myself. Apparently, his crew was 45 minutes late and had forgotten that can of material.
  • For weeks I had been asking him to send me the paperwork so I can fill it out to be paid as a W-2 employee under him, he finally sent me that yesterday via email. I still do not have the gas card, so far he has reimbursed me manually through CashApp. One of his sales guys who is no longer active was in possession of the iPad where we show our presentations, as well as color samples and a measuring tape for the estimates - he had them for 2 weeks or so and this guy only recently went to collect these things from him. I also had to ask over and over again to be added to the CRM so I could see the leads and appointments being scheduled, rather than have him need text or call me to let me know we had estimates scheduled later that same day. I currently have access, but only because he let me use his login...the lady who was supposed to set me up there told me I would have access by Friday, and that was 2 weeks ago.
  • This week he set me up with 2 appointments that he got through referrals rather than the CRM, meaning I didn't see them. He made the appointment first THEN asked if I was available to do them. The first of which I required him to push it back twice; first because I had a doctor's appointment that day, then again because he initially scheduled this at 4:30 PM and traffic began to accumulate from people returning from work. We got there at 5:00 PM and she was upset at our lateness so he just gave her a visual estimate rather than providing measurements The other was yesterday at 5:30 PM, which he scheduled AFTER I had asked him to talk to me about my availability before booking it. I had to shower at the gym, not knowing that my gym doesn't provide towels and has an out-of-order sauna, leaving me soaking wet as I drove in 5:00 traffic in pouring rain...he stated that these were referrals from other happy customers that requested that time.
  • I finally sat down with him earlier this week because of how unorganized this all was to try and iron out these problems. First off, in regards to things like his crew being late or his sales guy being hungover, he stated that "it's contracting, people know they're always late, doesn't matter we got the job done". I mentioned how most of our leads are down by the beach and are an unreasonable distance for me to travel regularly, he responded that these leads are where we make most of our sales because they're older people who have money and that he's giving them to me because he wants me to make a commission. He itemized how much we charge vs. how much it costs to get the job done, and he takes home roughly 30% or more on each job after expenses are paid and how he's on track to make about $90,000 this year so he doesn't take it too seriously, especially when it comes to customers trying to haggle down the price, with my argument being that if we're the least expensive option...and the best and most durable option...why are we going even cheaper? My analogy was that it's like asking for a discount at McDonald's. Again, he doesn't care too much as long as he's profitable, and he has a pretty large margin with little overhead. I also asked him why we don't market to affluent neighborhoods closer to us rather than by the beach. He responded that people in those neighborhoods find their garage coating "tacky". I asked how he targets his market via Facebook to which he says he doesn't really know and pays some woman to handle that (the same woman who's supposed to set me up in the CRM 2 weeks ago).
  • Finally, I want to draw attention to his character...he's a good friend from college, but he has a long-time girlfriend that he's on and off with, habitually cheating on and reconciling with. He's very generous with his friends, myself included, but has a habit of trying to have fun during the week, presumably so he can spend the weekend with his girlfriend...who he says he wants to marry, by the way...This leads to him going to Hooters often enough that he's a regular and inviting me along, where he often will get both of us drunk on a Monday or something...
Anyway, I just wanted some perspective on how "normal" this all is and whether I'm wasting my time and effort. Initially, I was hungry at the idea of earning 20% on $2,000 minimum jobs. But the way it's been going so far, I'm much less certain that the amount of time I spend driving around to these estimates and appointments will even out at a better dollar/hour than what I was hoping for.

Any thoughts would be appreciated, I know this is a long read.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
You probably are.
Any opinion on the armpit thing?

8/20/2023

I wasn't sure if I felt like posting this, but I learned something that bothered me tonight, so I figured I'd get it off my chest here.

First...this last Monday I had probably the worst day of my life so far where I came down with appendicitis. From around 7 AM Monday until around 8:30 AM Tuesday I was in inescapable stomach pain and nauseous on the verge of vomitting...I made myself a makeshift bed on the Emergency Room waiting area floor to lie down and constantly shift to try to temporarily relieve the pain while I listened for somewhere around 5 hours for them to call me back and give me a bed.

After a CAT scan confirmed that I had appendicitis, I was on alternating medicines for pain and nausea every four hours until my surgery barely slept, and didn't eat or drink...absolutely miserable experience. For the uninitiated - appendicitis is one of those things that just happens, or doesn't...but allowing it to rupture can quickly lead to death as your internals become septic...fun stuff.

Currently, I have 3 rather ugly sutured holes close to my belly button where they made the incisions, and cannot exercise or perform strenuous activity for 4-6 weeks; coughing sucks, sneezing REALLY sucks, and with the college school year back around here next weekend, I kinda doubt that I could even have sex...

Anyway, let's get to the part I actually wanted to talk about...

I picked up my drunk brother tonight from a wedding he had spent all day at. There was a hot bartender at the bar they were all hanging out at that he had hit on, gotten the Instagram of, and asked me not to flirt with her as well, which I respected. Later we're in the car and I ask him to show me what her Instagram looks like. He refuses, stating he's worried that I'll follow her, DM her, flirt with her, etc.

To my knowledge, I'd never done such a thing, so I wasn't sure why that was a concern - I've never bothered going after a girl any of my friends or family were interested in. So I start asking and he references some random girls from dating apps that we both matched with and ended up following. I tell him that's a garbage excuse because Delaware is small and I can't help it if we happen to both find the same person hot and find out we're mutual matches later. But then he references what I think this reservation ACTUALLY stems from. He claims that he doesn't trust me with girls he's interested in because I had sex with one that he had a crush on about a year ago I think at this point.

Backstory: I met this girl while out at the bar with my friend one night after a bit of a dry spell and we hit it off. I come to find that he and her had a thing several years ago, but clearly, she's into me tonight, and he lets that happen. She's from Delaware and claims to know my brother and sister. She mentions how my brother had a crush on her at some point in high school or early college and later on takes a Snapchat of both of us to him, not in spiteful fashion or anything, more of a "saying hi" kinda thing. I don't remember his exact response but I believe it was just a laughing emoji and something like "lol is that ***** with you?". I think I had a back and forth on how we came to meet, but I can't reference it because of how Snapchat is...

Later that night we have a one-night stand, I spend the night, and leave the next day, no big deal. I don't tell my brother about it until he comes to visit Delaware from New York because he starts mentioning her again and I felt that he should know that we hooked up in case that affects whether he still wants to pursue her. He does not. I didn't think anything else of it.

The way I see it: this is a girl that he had a crush on almost a decade ago that he never mentioned to me, I knew nothing of her until I met her that night and she told me how she knew my brother and sister. He dated a girl from his sophomore year of college until about 3 years ago and has been living up in New York since he graduated. She sent him a Snapchat of us out together and he said nothing that led me to believe he was uncomfortable with what was likely to (and did) happen that night.

The way he sees it: I hooked up with a girl that he likes, knowing he had had a crush on her, which was facilitated by the fact that she only knew of me because of him and my sister. He feels I wasn't forthcoming in not telling him that we had hooked up until a month or two later when he visited home and brought her up in conversation. Because of this, he doesn't want to introduce me to or show me women that he's interested in because he thinks I will do something similar with them.

This actually really pissed me off. As I've mentioned before with that former friend of mine that screwed me over with my ex at the beach, I don't really keep a lot of close friends. Most have either done me dirty in one way or another, or we've simply grown apart after no longer seeing each other regularly at work or school. I consider my brother my best friend; we have no ulterior motives, we can read each other very well, and we have a great time when we go out because we understand how the other likes to operate - I like to get really drunk and look for a woman I'd like to bed, and he likes to have a relaxed time out with friends while chatting up whoever he thinks is cute to see how the night goes.

I'm annoyed because I never withheld anything from him and felt like he was somebody I could honestly count on, and it's only tonight when he's plastered drunk that I find he purposely keeps things secret from me because he's been bothered about this for the better part of a year, without telling me.

Just wanted to get that off my chest. Maybe I'm the a**hole, maybe I'm not, but I was angered by the fact that my own brother, somebody I consider my best friend, couldn't tell me this situation bothered him; whether DURING via the Snapchat response, or AFTER at any point once I told him. Makes me feel like my trust and faith in him might be more one-sided...

That's all for now, goodnight.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
8/31/2023

Might start getting back into this a little bit. After all, journaling helped me analyze my own growth over time, and I did eventually achieve my goals when it came to women, so maybe I can continue that with women, health, and wealth.

I'll split these up into their own sections to make them easier for people to read if they care about certain sections rather than others.

Women

School is back in session, so it'll be fun at the college bar again. I went out last weekend with one of my buddies and my twin cousins had their birthday there on Monday, so I have a few phone numbers I'll hit up tomorrow and see about getting them to come out.

There are a few familiar faces, which is odd since I assume most of these girls graduated, but remember the post I made about the really hot chick that pulled back from kissing twice because she was "afraid she would want to f*** me"? She was out here. She said hi to me and was friendly, she was there with this same guy both times I saw her out over this last weekend and confirmed that she was here with her new boyfriend.

I had 2 FWBs from last year that I maintained up until the summer. Got kinda bored with one, she's attractive but the sex itself is pretty vanilla and I don't get a lot of feedback in the moment, which I enjoy. The other one was hotter and more fun, but she started bumming it and not putting a lot of effort into looking nice when I visited her, so my attraction kinda waned.

My ex is still in touch, purely for sex, haven't visited her in quite some time, but it's an option. I don't think I mentioned it last time, but she apologized for treating me the way she did and thanked me for putting up with her as long as I did, which was nice to hear. She recently lost her father in prison, who was her only surviving family member. Can't help feeling like despite the sh** she put me through, she doesn't deserve the upbringing and difficult life she's had, feel kinda sorry for her.

This weekend is a new weekend, and it's a long one, so we'll see how things go. I'm on a bit of a dry spell after the appendicitis surgery, so it would be nice to break that.

Health

It has now been 2 weeks since I had the surgery to remove my inflamed appendix. Still have the glue over the incisions, but it's slowly beginning to peel. I feel fine, but I'm told I need to continue abstaining from heavy lifting for another 2 weeks, so I've been trying to supplement that with cardio 30 minutes per day while maintaining my diet.

I had a family friend reach out to me on Instagram to check in on me and suggested I document my recovery and what I'm doing in the absence of exercise. I'll elaborate on that more in the wealth aspect of this post, but I gave it some thought.

Otherwise, I have a tentative surgery date in January to correct a deviated septum, a problem that has gotten more annoying over time for me.

Wealth

I'm planning to leave that floor coating business I went into with my buddy...there are simply too many red flags; he's disorganized, he's a functioning alcoholic, dude regularly cheats on his girlfriend, but the thing that makes him hardest to work with is the fact that he doesn't mean what he says...I have legitimate concerns I won't get paid the commission for the job I closed, or reimbursed for driving him around while I wait for a gas card that he's never issued me.

I voiced some of these grievances (which I had voiced in the past already), and he got a bit drunk again and aired it out in our group chat with our other sales guy. So I started taking screenshots to have some recourse to threaten his business if he does end up withholding my pay. He claims the reason he hasn't paid me is that the payroll company does pay on a biweekly basis on Fridays, so we'll see what happens this Friday.

Outside of that, I'd use the extra free time to really double-down on the ERC thing. I know it's for a limited time, but some of these guys are absolutely killing it, one of which is mentoring me, so I think the problem is moreso that I haven't figured out how to make this cold email outreach work, rather than that it DOESN'T work. Went through a lot of Alex Hormozi's content, for those who might be familiar with him, and have been trying to see how I might apply his suggestions to this marketing campaign while the program is still active.

The last part of the Health section about documenting my recovery...I had toyed with the idea of using a training app to remotely train clients via Instagram, since most of my content revolves around posting exercise videos. Based on Hormozi's stuff, I think what might be a good idea is to catalog my fitness journey to get back to where I was before my surgery.

From this, I would look to take on some clients for free with the caveat that I can use their before and after pictures, and use that to build a reputation where I can market paid services to future clients. Not sure how scalable this is, and not sure how profitable it is since at the end of the day...personal training isn't often a high-ticket service outside of competitive bodybuilding or celebrity trainers, neither of which I think I would do well since I approach this naturally without gear.

But it's a thought.

That's my update for the night, have a good one guys.
 

NorwegianDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 8, 2010
Messages
2,554
Reaction score
80
Try shaving and see how you feel.
Try trimming and see how you feel.
I shaved my body hair for many years until I gave up on it.
I feel great and better and better about my hair growth.
Bottom line is how you feel.

Regarding your health, look into - whatever it's called - minimum dose training.
If you don't know already, you'd be surprised by how little it takes to stimulate muscle growth.
Visualization can work just as well as working out.
There's Tim's 4 Hour Body from 13 years ago, but there have been many developments since then.
There is also ample research on both topics.

Perhaps this is a good time to slow down and look inwards.
It seems that you're being given both a signal and an opportunity.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
9/3/2023

I did end up trimming my armpits soon after I asked about it. I think I went too short, because it was quite uncomfortable, so in the future, I'll try with longer guards on my beard trimmer, but overall I think I like it better this way compared to how it was bushy.

Women

So this was the first weekend since everybody came back to school. The numbers of the girls I talked to last weekend and on Monday when I went out for my cousins haven't amounted to anything - I didn't really expect much and was not disappointed.

Thursday night I meant to make a post, but that got put to the side because I got invited up to NJ by my ex for some late-night sex, so I went and did that instead. But here's what happened before that...there was a girl I met the weekend before, had her number, and invited her out another night that weekend, no response, so I left it alone. She was at the bar and I said hi as I went past, but she stopped and started talking to me and was really interested in hanging out, asking if I wanted to leave and go on a walk with her - so I did.

We'd both been drinking a decent bit and we're walking back to her place, talking about random sh** and making out here and there. We get to her place and instead of going inside she sits down in one of the chairs on her porch, so I join her. We keep making out, but she doesn't remember my name and age; and when I remind her she mentions how she doesn't like my name because it's the same as one of her exes, and apparently I'm as old as her brother, which is where her mind went for whatever reason...she drunkenly forgets this one or two more times (I can't remember) and each time I reminder he she has the same reaction and decides she "can't do this" because me being older reminds her of her brother, in her words. As she goes next door because she wants to "play Wii with the neighbors", her roommate, who has joined us, says "this guy just walked you home, you can't just leave the poor man like that" or something along those lines...I appreciated that somebody there had empathy, but I just got up and walked away. Came back to the bar since there was still sometime before close, and a bunch of my friends on staff there saw me leave with her and asked why I was back, to which I told my unlucky story about my name and age.

There was this other girl and her friend who hit on me earlier in the night, they'll come into play later, but they also had the same answer I've been getting when girls ask me my age/if I go here, and I tell them I'm 29, which is: "why are you here?" I do believe women generally like older guys, but a majority of the experience I've had, at least in this college bar environment, has been the opposite.

Friday wasn't really anything special. From what I've seen so far, the girls this year aren't anything special. Furthermore, I've seen some familiar faces, so I guess half these chicks were just old juniors last year.

The girl and her friend that I mentioned above were there again. Thursday I wasn't that interested in her because she was just sitting down - I even hit on another girl in her friend group because I didn't recognize them later that night. Anyway she was celebrating her birthday and was really really drunk, but she still seemed really interested, so I got her number and she left with her friends.

The girl I smashed that I got "double-booked" with at the end of the school year earlier this summer was also here visiting from NY. Came over to say hi, she had another guy all over her and asked me to come tomorrow.

Saturdays are usually a miss, but the birthday girl from last night was asking me to come out, and the NY girl might be out, I had a couple of friends going, so I decided I'd take a look. It was pretty weak, and I'll probably keep the weekend outings to a Thursday/Friday thing from now on.

That said, me and the birthday girl hit it off, now that she wasn't absolutely plastered. Spent a little bit of the night talking and having a few drinks, asked what she was doing afterwards if she wanted some company, but one of her friends came from NJ to visit and is staying with her, so unfortunately that's not an option at the moment. Also, they all went to a winery super early this morning anyway. She texted me later apologizing for her friends leaving early in case she seemed abrupt at the end. I told her it was no big deal and I sent her a text saying "sh** I just realized I forgot something", hoping she would ask what, and I could say something corny like "your birthday gift, I'll give it to you next time ;)". Yeah...I was a little drunk so I'm glad she didn't respond to that first text or I might've sent the second one.

Not sure about her, seems super interested, but I don't know if she wants to f*** me or get to know me. I was considering hitting her up to see what she's doing tonight since Labor Day is tomorrow and they're off, but that's probably a bit too needy a bit too early.

NY girl was there, I think this next part is some BS, because I'm pretty sure she left with the guy from last night. When we initially f***ed she said she wanted a FWB, which I'm cool with, and I'm not a hypocrite so I can't get mad about her sleeping around too. But now she's saying she gets attached and isn't looking to just hook up - though she said if I ever visit in NY she'd love to have me over. I'm not going to test that theory.

There was also like one other attractive girl there, but the chick was tall...like 5'11" not wearing heels. Talked to her a little, and hit it off, she was headed out but gave me her number, probably nothing will become of that.

I think I'm making a lot of little cringey mistakes because it's been a little bit since I've had a new girl. Prior to the sex with my ex, it had been almost a month, and the last time I was with somebody new was a month and a half ago...plus the age thing is throwing me off since it turns into a coin toss on how the girls at this college bar feel about it.

Health

I mean I'm sure three nights straight drinking aren't doing my liver any favors...but at least I'm mostly recovered from the appendix thing.

Wealth

Not much here either, but at least I got my money for the job I worked for my friend. I'll have to pay him back once the payroll company actually makes the deposit, but now that he paid me until they can, I feel a little more comfortable.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
9/12/23

Just wanted to provide a short little update, since I had some things on my mind about why I haven't been pulling anything new lately...

Women

The buddies I go out with kind of agree with me on this one, but it's not looking like there's much new talent. There have been a lot of average girls out this year, and the girls that ARE attractive are usually ones that I know from last year who are either local or entering their senior year.

This in and of itself doesn't particularly matter, but most of the time this means I've hit on them or their friends at some point previously and they're not in the market. So I got introspective as to why things aren't lining up, and I think it really boils down to the fact that I'll only really bother hitting on 1 or 2 girls, sometimes 3 in any given night - so far as finding them hot enough to want to take home. If I strike out with these girls, that's usually it for the night. I noticed I do get hit on quite a lot, but it's just almost never by somebody attractive...maybe average is attractive enough for most guys, but I'm not similarly inclined, even when drunk.

I don't think I'm doing anything different, I still look good (everybody always guesses I'm 23 or 24 and tell me I look good for my age when I reveal I'm 29), and I still behave with the same self-confidence, and aggressiveness, but maybe I'm getting unlucky with who I'm choosing.

Anyway...

Health

Feels good to be back in the gym, I'm not doing heavy weights but the high rep counts make things nice and difficult. Since the surgery, I had lost about 6 or 7 lbs and likely quite a bit of strength.

Wealth

I managed to separate from my buddy's flooring company without issue. He wasn't surprised so maybe he was expecting me to leave with how I had been acting the last few days (not checking in on leads, not following up, etc). Once I get paid by the payroll company I'll reimburse the amount he paid me to cover for them.

In other news, I hate blaming other people for my financial situation, but sometimes I just hate having to rely on people for anything...quick story time:

I finally got a guy interested in filing for the ERC. The problem is his business is very large and the company I do introductions for only handles accounts up to 500 employees. So the guy mentoring me on the email campaigns for this helped me out by forwarding me to a company that DOES handle larger businesses. He set me up with an email and told me to CC this particular rep, and schedule the call with her, and I thought everything was good.

The day of the call I started getting emails from the guy asking if he was supposed to call up or something, it's 15 minutes past the scheduled time. I ask my mentor what happened and he brings me into a group conversation with the rep where I find out SHE doesn't handle accounts of that size and claims she can't reach him by phone because it goes straight to voicemail, meanwhile the guy is emailing me that he's sitting in front of his phone and it has not rung.

They told me I had to schedule the call with another rep who could handle an account of his size, and I apologized to the client and confirmed with him that I rescheduled him for another call slightly later in the day. Apparently, the issue was that my mentor didn't tell me that I had to include the employee count when I scheduled the call - I was not made aware I had to enter any of that information since the calendar link only required a phone number, email, business name, and time.

Furthermore, I have no idea how that call went because somebody entered me in this company's database as a client rather than a rep, and I haven't heard a word from anybody about whether that's been corrected so I can be paid if they end up helping him. I'd also simply like to know what the result of the call was.

I just really hate having to put any faith in anybody, but also can't do these things myself...

That's all for tonight, take care guys.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
9/23/23

Women


Not gonna lie, things are kinda rough right now, I haven't been with a new chick since the end of July when I went to Ocean City. I'm seeing the same 3 or 4 good-looking girls out at the bar as I've been seeing since the start of the school year - and they're the same chicks from last year. I want to emphasize "good-looking" instead of "hot" because I think these are the best-looking girls HERE, rather than girls I'd consider really hot. I've gotten a couple of numbers, but it always devolves into something along the lines of "here with friends" or "my friend is visiting from out of state", whether that's true or not. It's starting to get frustrating...I'm having a good time with my friends there but man it's been a long time since I've had something new...

Furthermore, I don't know what it is about this class but I have never seen this bar die down quite so fast as I've seen this year. I usually go out with about 2 hours left till close, so that's around 11 PM, as I've found the girls who are out at that hour are the ones who are single and more down to go home for a one-night stand. However, by midnight I'd say the population gets cut in half and all that remains are leftovers and dudes...

Dating apps are about as good as they've always been - supplementary at best.

One thing that caught my attention was a recent Wheat Waffles video that showed up in my feed:

Now I'm not black pill, but watching this video and seeing all these average girls rate dudes like Chris, Ian, and Fred so low despite being absolute Chads was quite disappointing. He talks about the "age pill" and shows how Chris and Ian, despite being very attractive for their age, and in Ian's case, wealthy, were rated very low because these girls found them "too old". Whether this is just something they're doing for the camera as kind of an "anti-slut defense" where they'd jump on these guys in person is a separate story, but if I'm to take this video at face value, it's a little demoralizing. I've come here before about having girls who were otherwise interested in me go cold when they found out my age. One such case I just learned last night; there was a really hot girl I met at the end of last year and went home with, and as we were getting undressed to f*** she got sick and started puking. I stay the night, nothing happens, I leave in the morning and we never seal the deal. I've been seeing her at this bar as one of the 3-4 good-looking girls I mentioned, and I asked her what changed after that night that she didn't want to see me. Her response was that I'm "like 30".

Anyway, I don't really know what I'm going to do about this, I could try different venues, but everything is more expensive, further away, or both. And that's before I find out if hot girls even go to these places.

Health

I'm mostly recovered from the surgery at this point, my trainer told me to resume my regular workout with my regular weights next week, so it'll be nice to return to that. Not much else has changed, really looking forward to fixing my septum since I'm getting really tired of the post-nasal drip.

Wealth

So this one's gonna suck...I found out last week that the IRS has issued a moratorium on any new claims for the Employee Retention Credit. I tuned into a weekly call with the company I do these referrals for, and they're operating business as usual, but for me, not so much. Basically, they're not processing any new claims until "at least" the end of this year. Beyond that, they've extended the processing time on new applications to 180 days...so if I were to help anybody get their refunds I wouldn't be able to get paid until June of next year AT THE EARLIEST.

Because of this, I decided to stop my subscriptions to do my outreach, as I'd just be bleeding money at this point. So I need to find a new vehicle...
  • My mentor buddy introduced me to a company called RAC Financial which tries to sell payment processing to businesses. Their allure comes from doing an actual onboarding and underwriting process and offering lower processing fees. He brought some other guys onto this as well since they seem to be pivoting, but I'm much less excited about jumping into another "great idea". I probably won't put much thought into this unless I see some of the other guys having success with it.
  • I have a guy who lives in NJ that I've been collaborating with on copywriting stuff for the past year. He does a lot of contracting work and wants to get me paid, so I've been finding emails and names of higher-ups in companies that he wants to reach out to and plans to cut me in on any deals that close. No real details for this one yet, but I have a lot more free time without doing ERC, so why not?
  • I still plan to try the online personal training thing with the app once I've finished compiling my recovery routine. I've already gone through a full day's worth of eating and plan to post that and my workout routine in my highlights on Instagram. From there I'll try to take on some free clients to use them as testimonials.
  • Stocks/futures is still something in the back of my head...it would be extremely difficult and time-consuming to learn, but I wouldn't be at the mercy of any other person or event, like what's happening with ERC, when it comes to my income - it would all come down to my ability.
  • I could just start working full-time at the medical marijuana clinic I manage. I hate my boss, but it's easy to work with minimal supervision. Still, working full-time there is only like $35k/year...I've also considered just checking in on Indeed to see if there are any jobs that don't sound miserable.
The fact that student loans resume at the beginning of next month isn't particularly fun either...doesn't really get me any closer to getting out of my parent's place.

So yeah, not much good news here, but maybe somebody will read this and have some insight - whether in terms of girls or when it comes to business.

I'll tag @RazorRambo24 in this one since I know you're one of the credible guys on here to see if you have any pointers on any of this. Hope things are going well with your current girl.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
10/9/23

Women


So luckily things have improved a little bit here.

First off, I had my first new girl in a while last weekend. Met her at the bar on Thursday with my buddy. Unfortunately by the time I met her, I was way too drunk and was being stupid, but I did end up getting her number...I got like 2 others I think but those didn't turn into anything so I'll disregard them.

What's funny about this is it was way too loud where I was talking to her and I thought she had told me her name was Carly because I asked her "is it spelled with a C or a K?" So when I texted her saying "have a nice night Carly" she thought I was just some a**hole that lost track of which girl he was texting. Now, while she's not wrong, it was an honest mistake that her friend pointed out later when she was talking about how I texted her the wrong name because she reminded her that I asked the earlier question about her name spelling.

Anyway, she came out the next night and texted me asking where I was. Once she found me we hung out, her friends left, I kissed her at the bar, and asked if she wanted company tonight. Brought me back, had sex a few times, talked for a while to the point where I sobered up, and left her place at 4 AM to drive myself home. Kept in touch and texted once in a while, actually saw her this weekend as well as well, except I stayed the night this time.

I felt a little dirty last weekend because I also saw my ex on Saturday night the day after, but that visit was fine and we both enjoyed ourselves, so no harm there.

The current girl of interest is a Brazilian chick I met out in West Chester last night. I never go out on Saturdays, but my buddy's girlfriend was out of town and wanted to go out for a change, so we did. The background on this girl is that she's been in the US for around 4 months, and was there with 2 other Brazilian girls who were doing the same; one who had been here about 3 months, and the other who had been here a little over a year.

Met her at the first bar we were at that night and got her number. She seemed in a bit of a rush to get back to her friends, who I saw watching us have out conversation, so I told her I'll let her know when we get to the fun bar at the end of the night and she's and her friends want to come, to text me.

That's exactly what happened at the end of the night, except she and her friends wanted to go to a different bar instead, so I told my friends what I was doing and accompanied them. I forget at which point I went for the kiss, but she was receptive and her friends were pretty hands-off, so we were having a good time. Had a few drinks at the after-hours bar where I found out she's almost 27 and stays with the 2 other girls at their host family's place.

By the time that bar closed her friends walked up the street a bit and gave us some privacy. I'm making out with this girl but she feels a little uncomfortable just making out in front of all these random people, so I walk her down this alley right in front of us (classy I know) and start really getting into it making out. She unzips her shirt and I suck on her t**s a little bit before she decides we can't do this here and we return to her friends.

After that, she and her drunk friends were wandering around having fun and figuring out where they wanted to eat and stuff. The basic gist of it with this girl is that I can't come home with her because she and her friends' host family wouldn't allow that, which is understandable...and I'm a half hour away at my parent's house so I don't have anywhere to take her either. The current plan is she wants to see me on Monday, so I figure if I can close this it'll probably either be in my car or at some hotel/motel. One thing I did notice was that she says she doesn't like to "have sex" she likes to "make love"...so I'm not sure if that'll factor in.

However, I didn't know tomorrow was Columbus Day, so I imagine a lot of places will be closed...what I'd like to do is grab a few drinks at this rooftop bar out there in West Chester, but I'm not sure it's open...we'll figure it out.

Health

Last two weeks I was able to do my old workout routine with my regular heavy weights. I've lost a little bit of strength, but it feels good to have recovered enough that I'm not just sitting at home doing cardio or using light weights.

Right now I'm around 198lbs and haven't lost muscle definition - still lean and look good, but I need to get my strength back a bit more.

Wealth

I'll be honest, I don't really have a plan right now...everything I've put effort into has gone to **** in one way or another, so I feel a little unmotivated and lazy at the moment. I still don't want to work a typical job for the rest of my life, making mediocre money, but the fact that I'm still at home and almost 30 is really driving me nuts.

I don't know...I'll explore the fitness app route and see if there's enough interest among my current followers to warrant putting thought into this avenue. Beyond that, I don't know...maybe I'll post in the Wealth subforum and see if anybody can offer some insight.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,271
Reaction score
10,527
I'm still at home and almost 30 is really driving me nuts.
Why? Five minute of basement dwelling alpha status beats 5 years of being a boring beta male.


I still don't want to work a typical job for the rest of my life, making mediocre money,
If you can figure out how to pull that off, good for you. Most white and blue collar working men don't enjoy what they do and most make mediocre money doing what they do. If they are unmarried, they do it to have their own place for having sex with women. If they are married, they do it to keep the wife happy and often times to support a child or children.

I didn't know tomorrow was Columbus Day, so I imagine a lot of places will be closed...what I'd like to do is grab a few drinks at this rooftop bar out there in West Chester, but I'm not sure it's open...we'll figure it out.
Most places are open for Columbus Day. It's a rather minor holiday.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
Why? Five minute of basement dwelling alpha status beats 5 years of being a boring beta male.

Yeah I've read Roosh's thing, and while I'm sure it's possible to capitalize on that, it's my inner disappointment that my ventures have failed and I still have to rely on my aging parents that bothers me...beyond simply not having a place to bring women I meet.

Additionally, even if I WERE to go this route, my parents are semi-hoarders and the house is usually in disarray outside my bedroom. My dad is artistic and designed each room with a "theme", mine being circus-themed; we're talking a full-sized tiger jumping through a flaming hoop as a clock...a full-sized lion corkboard in front of my computer desk on the wall...a tightrope with a man walking it on my ceiling in the likeness of my father...a dresser that's been designed to look like a cage with a mandrill inside...point being: it's not happening here. It's cool and unique I guess, but it is not conducive to sex.

If you can figure out how to pull that off, good for you. Most white and blue collar working men don't enjoy what they do and most make mediocre money doing what they do. If they are unmarried, they do it to have their own place for having sex with women. If they are married, they do it to keep the wife happy and often times to support a child or children.
True, but most people also only have sex with like 10 or fewer women in their lifetime before getting married in their mid-late twenties, oftentimes with an ex or high school sweetheart.

I don't want to be like most people.

Most places are open for Columbus Day. It's a rather minor holiday.
I thought so too, but the place I wanted to bring her tonight is a Latin rooftop bar that I found out about after taking this one chick there a few years ago. Online it says they're closed today, so I'll have to call to double check.

What I'd like to do is hang out with her over a few drinks then either f*** in the car or go to some hotel/motel, which I'd prefer not to do seeing as it's like $100 for just a few hours when I don't really have money like that...

Also she texted me good morning today and asked how my day is going...that's sweet and all but I don't know if she's going to be DTF like that. Plus seeing as she lives with a host family I assume she doesn't have a car and I'll have to pick her up my "awesome" Prius. She sounds like she might be looking for something a little more serious than what I am...not sure, what do you think?
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,271
Reaction score
10,527
my "awesome" Prius.
Your Prius is not going to get you laid.

I don't want to be like most people.
Good for you. I like men who challenge conventions.

most people also only have sex with like 10 or fewer women in their lifetime before getting married in their mid-late twenties, oftentimes with an ex or high school sweetheart.
Fewer people are marrying a high school or college sweetheart now.

Median age at first marriage now is around 30 for men and 28 for women. The typical guy marrying is some Average Frustrated Chump who is marrying some mid woman he met from a swipe app or bar approaching if he's a Greater Beta. These are guys relenting to the societal pressure and individual pressure from his woman to marry because a relationship has managed to last 2 or 3 years.

Yeah I've read Roosh's thing, and while I'm sure it's possible to capitalize on that, it's my inner disappointment that my ventures have failed and I still have to rely on my aging parents that bothers me...beyond simply not having a place to bring women I meet.

Additionally, even if I WERE to go this route, my parents are semi-hoarders and the house is usually in disarray outside my bedroom.
A messy environment at your home due to your parents isn't going to help you get laid.

she texted me good morning today and asked how my day is going...that's sweet and all but I don't know if she's going to be DTF like that. Plus seeing as she lives with a host family I assume she doesn't have a car.... She sounds like she might be looking for something a little more serious than what I am...not sure, what do you think?
What happened with her? Were you able to have sex with her?
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
Your Prius is not going to get you laid.
I'm well aware lol. Though it has been christened at least twice that I remember.

Fewer people are marrying a high school or college sweetheart now.
Yeah, that kinda ties in with the "don't want to be like most people" thing. I haven't been getting around as much lately but that's mostly because I took on a full time job and am doing something on the side to try and build to make money and change my situation.

A messy environment at your home due to your parents isn't going to help you get laid.
Beyond getting laid, it is a legitimate problem. I've thought about asking around on Reddit or something to get advice on how to intervene...they both blame each other and end up not doing much of anything every time they go on a kick to get things straightened up. I want to rent a dumpster and just start throwing things away because we have so much s*** because my mom would rather donate things to Goodwill or potentially hold onto items that could be given as Christmas/birthday gifts.

It is honestly one of the things that infuriates me most about living there and I'm not sure the solution. I'm beholden to them because I'm living under their roof, and I've offered my services as far as moving heavy s*** out, but they just make excuses and the s*** accumulates...

I don't know if they'll bother getting rid of stuff until one of them dies, in which case the excuse that they'll have to consult with the other before getting rid of things wouldn't be viable anymore. I don't know...

What happened with her? Were you able to have sex with her?
Nothing.

She hit me up drunkenly one night in January asking me to come out, I said no, and her reply was something like "lol ok".

Found her on Tinder a couple weeks ago and hit her up seeing if she wanted to finally meet for drinks. She never answered my text to confirm and expecting the same as before, I didn't go and I assume she didn't show up. Haven't heard from her since.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,271
Reaction score
10,527
You need to get out of your parents' pad and get a bachelor pad with a roommate in either Wilmington or Philadelphia.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,271
Reaction score
10,527
Realistically how much would you think you'd need saved up/to be making to afford something like that?

My main thing is I want to move out and STAY OUT this time.
I'm not sure. It depends on rents in those areas. You also want to have some degree of stability in your employment.

The least expensive, non-ghetto 2 bedrooms/2 bathrooms that are available in Dallas near Downtown are around $1,800-$2,000 a month. That's $850-$1,000 per roommate. You are able to get a better price on a 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom apartment but then you're sharing a bathroom.

If you went out into the Dallas suburbs, you could reduce that 2 bedroom/2 bathroom price range by around $200-$300 ($100 to $150 per roommate) but your logistics would stink for meeting other unmarried people.

Philadelphia and Wilmington prices are likely similar.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
1,941
Reaction score
365
Location
Wilmington, DE
3/18/24

It's a bit slow at work here, and I have about a half hour before I leave and go to the gym, so I'll update this and see how long it ends up being or how far I get.

Women

Not much has really happened on this front. Back around December if I remember right, ended up adding another notch to my count. Girl from Bumble. Had low expectations, being a dating app, but we ended up meeting, having some drinks, and f***ing my car since she lives with her mom and I had driven about an hour to see her. She was above average, but nothing amazing, so I wasn't too interested in setting up another meeting where I'd be driving an hour each way just to see her. She was understanding and not clingy, which was refreshing, but she RAVED about how I got her off with just my fingers. I got this down to a technique and could tell when she "finished", which she thought was incredibly hot, stating she usually had to fake it with guys. In case anybody's interested; middle and ring finger inside, hook upwards, pinky and index finger on the outside, use your elbow and wrist to leverage your hand to go faster. Very little actual finger movement.

Outside of that, I'd been visiting my ex on some no-strings-attached type stuff until recently. The sex is great, I can still love her without being IN LOVE with her, and we were able to enjoy each other's company without drama. The key phrase there, however, is "until recently". I visited her a few weeks ago, and it was like any other weekend, but this time I was asking her about her family and life in general while we chilled and drank, and things were going well until I caught her in a lie...when we were dating, there was a period early on where she was supposedly getting DMs that I was cheating on her whenever I returned to Delaware. She never told me who it was, and based on some descriptors, I ASSUMED who it was at the time and confronted them. Obviously they didn't know what I was talking about and thought I was nuts, but eventually we just moved past that since she wouldn't tell me and claimed it wasn't an issue if I wasn't cheating.

Fast forward to this weekend and she mentions, among other random things, that she had recently had another conversation with that girl and still had the messages in her phone. This time her descriptors were different, and she still wouldn't tell me who it was, so I had to make the assumption again, this time asking if I guess correctly whether she would confirm it. I guessed right - it was a female friend of mine that I'd known since I was a junior in college. Always completely platonic, and I'd even slept with her friend, which she knows about. I demand to see the messages my ex supposedly had, and she refuses because "it doesn't matter anymore", it was "2 years ago", and "she tried to talk to me about it then but I didn't want to see it". That last part in particular pissed me off, because that was a straight up lie. I get very angry, calling my friend and saying that I need her to type my ex's name into her Instagram messages and send me a screenshot. She's confused, and annoyed because of how late it was at the time, but sends me a screenshot of her typing my ex's name and not even knowing who she was on Instagram, with no results showing up. So at this point I'm very upset at this lie and the fact that my ex refuses to show me these "messages", and eventually leave, block her on everything, and delete her number. She kept making arguments like "why would I lie about this", "you think I'm just making this up?" and when I tell her to show me the proof she defaults to "I tried to talk to you about this 2 years ago when we were dating, now we're not, so I don't owe you this".

I cannot understand why she would do this...and part of me thinks she believes her own lie.

Anyway, the bar scene has been lacking and I've spent most weekends focusing on my business, which I'll explain later, so this last weekend I stayed with a buddy down in Dewey Beach for St. Patty's. This further reinforced that I need to get out of Delaware...just guys everywhere with a small handful of girls that are like 6s or below and maybe 1 or 2 8s to go around, where everybody's been daydrinking since like noon...I think I need to find places that have clubs or something rather than bars; places where you can drink AND dance rather than just be crowded as hell surrounded by frat bros and dad bods. I got a couple numbers, and had 2 prospects that I thought something would pan out with, but at the end of the night they stopped responding and I went back with my buddy alone. They both texted me the next morning, but at that point I was already headed back north to get ready for work.

Without my ex in the picture, and without a decent bar scene, I anticipate getting cranky as this dry spell gets longer and longer. Not looking forward to that.

Health

Right now I'm about 202lbs, which is really nice to be this big while still being lean. At the beginning of the year I had a septoplasty to fix a deivated septum, which absolutely sucked...but at least I can breathe easier. Soon I'll be increasing my cardio to get ready for beach season, but otherwise there's no much to report here.

Still healthy, still fit, still strong.

Wealth

I can't seem to catch a break here...around late November I came across SMMA and watched some videos by guys who wanted to offer how they "made it" for free, rather than charging for it like it's some proprietary information, a la Iman Gadzhi & Co. I signed on with a community built around this business model with a variety of niches and spent the last couple months figuring things out.

I decided to focus my business on the mortgage niche, specifically loan officers. I figure that since I had spent some time working at a lender, and as a real estate agent, that having this background would help me speak their language. I was considering the gym niche, but figured they didn't have as much money to throw around in comparison. It is not mid-March, and I cannot seem to get even a little lucky. I've spent a lot of money running Facebook ads, constantly ducking into a side office room to take intro calls from leads while at work, and rushing home from the gym after work to hop on the computer and pitch any scheduled demos.

Over the last 2 weeks I "closed" my first 2 clients that WEREN'T test run/free trial clients, and thought my effort was finally paying off. I say "closed", because I am no longer as optimistic as I was...one guy I closed on a performance model, and he hasn't launched yet because he can't seem to get into the Facebook ad account and somehow managed to get his account disabled...I don't even know how he did this, and I'm not sure I can guide him how to figure it out, since he wants to be able to see the ads before launching...even though I can show him on my own screen share...The other guy was closed on retainer, but before I invoiced him he ended up in the hospital for the 2nd time that week (the first time was why he missed out initial demo appointment). He responded to me today that he thinks he's going to take a step back and focus on his health, and therefore won't be proceeding.

So my initial excitement is gone, and I'm wondering whether I just need to stick with it longer, or if I'm just throwing money down a hole at this point. I'm considering just marketing myself online via Trainerize as an online personal trainer. Maybe I'm approaching the right business model, but am using the wrong vehicle - maybe I should focus on something I know and love (health and fitness), rather than something I kinda know and think can pay me good money (loan officers). I don't know...just been feeling defeated after reading that today, thinking I had finally found some success, but instead am still sitting at square one. The one saving grace is that I'm working full-time at my job now, which pays me about $46k/year...but I'm still just living at home with my parents and most of the money I've been saving has been going towards this...I really want to be able to move somewhere and stay there, ideally somewhere warm with decent-looking women and a nightlife; I imagine Philadelphia, Florida, parts of Arizona would have what I'm looking for.

I think that's about it. Unfortunately not a lot of positivity, but I think that's partly my current state of mind, and partly because I'm looking at what I need to improve rather than what I have going for me.

Anyway, glad I got this all out before my shift ended, curious to read if anybody has advice to offer on any of this. Thanks for tuning in.
 

FlexpertHamilton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
2,348
Reaction score
2,814
Location
US
Is your name short for benign prostate hypertrophy?
 
Top