Taken it slow

Cpal

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Hi there im 22 girl im seeing is 24. Right the thing is this fancing her went on a while. I was goin through a tough relationship and so was she and we work together and talked about the relationships with each other and helped each other through them. Now mine ended at start of november and hers a week before valentines there now 2016 and we been texting because i was helping her deal with and for last week we've got real close 3 nights ago she aske me why i was helping her and i send because you know i like you and we been helpng each other deal with them and then she said she did like me to an wanted to take it slowly meet here and there which i understand and said in order trust me i would have to work for it and show her i meanr whatsaid about the feelings and that night then she got thick saying if i did why didnt i ask her did she want meet up and that and hang out and i basically said because your not long out relationship and didnt want yiu thinking i was trying get the ride or using her when she vulnerable and then we sorted that out following night we agreed that we would meet up after she finsihed work and then another argument started from her over nothing and then she sent me at least 5 messages on snapchat basically put short saying she didnt want be friends or have anymore contact with me and just barely pass each other in work. Now this pissed me off and i said why cant we be mature about like she was the one who said she wanted a mature person to suit her and like after telling me she liked me and has feelings for me night before and deep chats but to say no contact not even friends i just basically was hurt and said like be mature about this and why cant we at least stay friends and carry on way we are as friends. Anyway i got no reply to this message other than one saying she got two more days in work.. ill be finishef at 8... Now this was message i got so i just text back saying you still calling down at 8 and then she said ye and did. Now while i was waiting for her i was thinking im saying it to her about the row last night we had and her saying no contact until that messge bout finishing at 8 when she came down then she talked bout work for first few minutes and then i said it to her we talked things out she said that if we were to hook up that cant tell anyone and that we take it slowly whifh i understand because i never went to make the move or ask her down because she was long out of it n i didnt know how she felt but anyway she said taking it slow and seeing what happens but if we did hook up she still wants be free and able to what she likes which im not stopping her doing i just want be on same page so i know where she stands feeling wise and i to but then she keeps saying it wont work and then we agreed that we would meet up a friends here an there an that at some stage we should kiss so we know if there really is anything there and i said how about now an she said ano to soon and giggled then we said we go in sitting room do somehing or watch something and played gta i showed her the buttons and then one thing led another an i kisse her an that kept goin then we moved it upstairs and kept at it and the drying humping then she said it felt good and so did i but she still says she wants take it slow and i understand it but its just her heads messed and she takes things up arse ways and gets thick or upset and when i explain more she gets it but goes from all wanting hook up and this and that but same time to be not texting all time or hanging out and see what happens but she keeps gwtting these anxious states and i dont know how to approach what moves shoukd make wheb to text or that if we have be real private moving slow yet not been contact much because she doesnt know what do and afraid of her getting feels and me not having them or other way around and then it been awkward and i said but we can still be adults and friends and still get on to but i dont exactly where i stanf or she stands ir what i should do or how often i should text or be in contact because she did say i have to show im willing to fight for her and show her that i do like her as much as i say i do which i alot but i didnt that to her i just said i do like ya an have feelings for her but like when i was breaking up my girl friend at time there was alot goin on with me an her but first time i seen hazel i was like omg wow and then when we were helping each other with relationships at time i was developing feelings for her and that was another reason i broke up with x but like ive like hazel for a good while but recentlt they gone up since we been getting much closer an she said she does have strong feelings for me and really likes me as friend and that an doesnt want ruin friendship either and neither do i but thing is i respect her and like her good bit that i would like see something happen down line but at minute i duno what do bout how often should contact her if have show how much i like her an that i would fight for her but same time she needs time be alone and single. Like i really dont know what to do ive been overthinking our last few nights and rows and then the kissing and all so i really do not have clue what to do.
So please no stupid replies i need genuine hand with this because dont want do wrong thing and would really appreciate some good advice because even thinking that ive wrote all this that my feelings are that bit more than i thought haha so please and thanks guys
 

cola

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Too hard to read without being broke into paragrapghs.
But she doesnt like you that much.
Women make it perfectly clear when they are into you.
They wont have you writing essay questions on dating sites
 

Reykhel

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A stream of consciousness : "also known as an interior monologue, is a narrative mode or device that
depicts the multitudinous thoughts and feelings which pass through the mind."

Unless you are James Joyce, consider editing your steam of consciousness if you want your post
to be read and answered.
 

Lozboss

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tl;dnr

Learn to write like somebody with the ability above a 6 year old and we'll try and help.
 

RangerMIke

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Okay for what I can get out of that... poorly written submission.

It is VERY hard to move from emotional tampon to boyfriend. When she was in a difficult relationship you two would commiserate about relationships.... she doesn't see you as a guy... you are a girlfriend.

The Book of Pook explains all this and why it happens...

She also told you to go away. The only proper response from you is "okay", telling her to 'be mature' is a waste of time and will only tick her off.

You were a gay male girlfriend that she told to leave her alone. YOU ARE DONE. Move on and go find other women, learn from this.
 

Cpal

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Right basically she wants meet and take it slow shift and meet up and hang out but same time doesnt want be texting whole time and that but says she wants see how we go but enjoy been single which i completely understand.
But like how the **** am i suppose know what to do like when to text or ask to meet up because she also said if i liked her and wanted somwthing i have show i will fight for it and not talking **** n lying... but same time wants be alone and that now thats as simple i can go without extra details so that who ever helps might pick up on something thats why my last one was so awkward to read so look just once again only honest answers about it please and thanks guys
 

salinechow

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I couldn't read the post. I just couldn't. Maybe one day, when I am willing to brain train. Yet, given the responses, And what little I could make out from the post itself...Oneitis.

Reset, reframe, talk with other girls and revisit this one when you have gone on at least three other dates.
 

Xeon21

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Despite my massive experience in looking at screens and text all day long, even my eyes couldn't decipher that entire block of text. Some paragraphs and punctuation would be quite helpful in eliciting some help from others in the forum.

From the few things I could read along with others' responses, I would have to say just move on and don't waste your time. It's not worth the effort and beating yourself up emotionally over.
 
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