For five years, even in my absence, I have been attacked for looking for yourself for structure in the world. When you were young, your parents and friends gave you structure of the world. You knew your role of going to school, of escorting a girl to the prom, doing your chores, doing your work, and so on. After school, you are cast out into the world. What structure should you have? Obviously, 98% of the males and probably 99.5% of the females look for an external voice for structure. Females follow their mother. If they have no maternal figure in their lives, they adopt what society (media) tell them. This site deals primarily with young males. Almost always, these males hear an external voice (women) and adopt a female structure. How do you measure yourself? This is the 'Great Question'. Nice Guys measure themselves based on their degree of chivalry. "I am so nice to her!" they take as pride. They wish only to be nicer to women then they actually are! Materialists measure their masculinity based on their paycheck. "Look at me!" says the salesman, working god-awful shifts. "I am making so much money!" If someone is making less money then they are, they are an idiot. If someone is making more money then they are, then they are to be treated as a demi-god. Citizen Dildos (my name) for the Seducer/ Player types measure their masculinity based on how many girls they can sleep with. They demand 'proof' and 'reports' of "conquests" from everyone. Shining Stars are the type of people who want to be socially superior to others. These type of people start off in life as tattletalers. But they nevertheless end up going into journalism, law, running for political office, not because they want to but because they measure themselves based on how other people see them. These people have some fame but nothing lasting. Many irrelevant rockstars, actors, and artists fit in this condition. They become, at best, a Ben Jonson, but never a Shakespeare. Their success is short-lived. They also become famous because they fall, as shining stars are meant to do. Gentlemen, what do all four of these have in common? They are structures built around women. In a woman's life, she will go through all four of these types, as all four types serve her purposes. The Nice Guy is easily exploited (by her and rest of society). Materialists give her the gifts and things she thinks she 'needs'. Shining Stars give her the illusion of success (why get a doctorate when you can just marry a professor?) And Citizen Dildos are the mutual masturbation as she goes through these guys. All these guys profess they are happy, that they are the ONLY ones living the 'true' life and ALL others are living a life of shame. They are happy but not joyful. Their happiness is that of an addiction, the addiction is to feminine praise. When it is not there, these males become depressed. The four 'structures' are simply means of getting feminine praise, in some form or another. I have been through all four of these structures. Each one gave me pain and pleasure. The pleasure, of course, was pleasing women. I switched from one structure to another when I realized it would gain more feminine praise. People say the objective is sex. Then explain to me why the never-laid Nice Guy will not a) visit a prostitute b) sleep with easy girls c) Etcetera. The objective is not sex, it is feminine praise. Those addicted to it will be so endorphinized to see their lives slouch towards mediocrity. I trace the beginnings of female-centered life structures with Rousseau, who laid the eventual eggs that hatched matria-lineage and matriarchy. Today, it is blind to us because most of us have never been told anything different. My posts and ideas came not just from everyday observations but from the long line of history, religion, and literature that binds us all. It comes from famous biographies, from chats with very successful people you don't know (and some you do), and from looking at the failures in others. What is failure? All four personalities differ on it. But I would define failure as betraying your soul, as living someone else's dream, and having no direction in life. What is success? It is love. Not love for chivalrous relationship (Nice Guy), not love for pu$$y (Citizen Dildo), not love for money (Materialist), and not love for glory (Shining Star). It is the genuine love for life. Find what you love and direct your passions to it. You will know you have found the right mate not because you two love the same hobbies, but because you both love the direction you (and she) are going in life. If you want to live your life working for money, or being nice to women, or working for pu$$y, or being praised by society, then don't be afraid to go ahead. All life is an experiment. I could be wrong. But I am not wrong about myself. I hope you do not choose a path that is wrong for you and your soul. When it is wrong, you will know. Imagine how Jesus would feel if he was cast to play the role of Napoleon. The result is the divided soul which is a classical subject in many works, most chiefly Hamlet (a good natured artistic youth cast in the role of savage revenge by the father? How many families want their offspring to play a role they are not suited for?) What if we make our own structure, completely independent of feminine praise? What if we follow OUR dreams instead of women's dreams? What if the truly smart were not those who read lots of books but those who could read their own heart and soul? Five years I have been off and on this forum. Five years, the same dull dreary mug-wump sayings have been cast at me. I could copy and paste what was talked about me five years ago as it will match the same as today. What are my 'themes' that cause the same old sayings (and when misplaced, its praises)? You are the focus of your world. Not the women. Instead of pissing away your youth trying to 'please' women, why not invest that time in yourself? Such a radical concept! How dare I speak blasphemy to our Female Goddesses the youth sacrifice their lives to. Sex does not make you unique. Another radical concept! Because sex is what women have recognized to give often as 'feminine praise'. How many men think they are the glory of the world because of sex? Live the life YOU want. Materialist- If a man spends his life in a soul destroying job, he is held up as a model for society. Nice Guy- A man discovers 'great love' and throws himself at the girl, putting her on the pedestal, he kneeling, as she becomes his new goddess. Shining Star- Wants to enchant the gossipers, be it newspapers, television or radio shows, and whatever else. They want loud titles to hide that they are not truely men, no matter their scripted appearances. Citizen Dildo- A life full of notches on the bedpost. But then what? All four are addictive because they flood your body with stimulants. What is a Nice Guy's addiction of 'love' but a stimulant? Why don't you just get a needle and jab it in your arm, at least it won't be absurd. Since I am not on the typical scale of Nice Guy or Seducer, everyone wants me to act 'fully' as one or the other. But I'm neither. Most websites can be categorized into the four. This site flaps like a flag caught in harsh winds, not deciding which way fully to go, but wants to keep leaning to the Citizen Dildo. The websites that speak of a different alternative are few, just as few as the men that do it. Since I already have hundreds of pages of posts here, I have found a site that might help elaborate on this viewpoint further. Every post he makes is one I could have made, almost spot on. http://mirrorofthesoul.blogspot.com/ (note: his tone puts off many people. Also, some ideas he has are a bit too isolationsist. But his heart is in the right place: live your life instead of living for women.) Sexuality is rapidly becoming a political and cultural problem, as strange as that may be. Single women are increasing, birth rates are plunging, more people are becoming infertile, which causes secondary reactions (immigration becomes more pronounced, elderly social programs become threatened, governments spend money on marriage promotion and baby promotion). A storm is raging through our age. Too many guys are concerned about not getting wet (simply getting laid, finding a decent girl to marry, etc.) and not getting out of the way of this howling juggernaut that is already destroying nations, cultures, and family lines (of the bigger issues, such as matriarchy, plunging birth rates, etc). http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4112450.stm I wish you guys well. Just remember: you do not dodge a juggernaut by throwing yourself in front of it.